*****YES!!! I got ALL of the files from my old computer back, including chapter
two. Thanks to all my reviewers; Kaoru Kamiya, Chiad, Gami-chan, Yameno
Tenshi, Hime Pisa, *Azumi Yui*, Demos the Battousai, Sailor Lala no Baka (I've
know her since grade 3. I have a right to say that. Especially since it's true!),
Ryuen, DemonicCatGirl, The Demon Princess, Chibi_ukyou, Abby, and Lanen. I
hope everyone likes chapter to!
Selph*****
Great.More Wierdos
Chapter Two
By Selphine
"OUCH!!!" Akane landed on the hard dirt road, in the middle of someplace that
was definitely NOT Jusenkyo. Great, she thought. Where the hell am I?
She stood up, dusting the dirt off her skirt, and looked around. People hurried
around the marketplace, wearing clothes that somewhat resembled Ranma's.
China? She glanced again, and noticed no strollers, hi-tech message boards,
or trendy clothing stores. ANCIENT China??!!
She sighed, and picked up her fallen backpack, flicking a bug off of it. Slinging it
on her shoulder, she gripped the straps with both hands, and began to walk.
***********
A figure in a trenchcoat watched Akane from the trees, grinning like the drunk
idiot he was.
***********
"Um, excuse me, miss, but could you tell me where jusenkyo is?" Akane tapped
an elegant woman on the shoulder.
"Jusenkyo?" The woman repeated.
"Yeah," Akane replied. "Jusenkyo." The woman had no clue. "Drowned springs?"
she supplied. "In the Bayankala Mountain range?"
The woman thought for a second, then replied. "I don't know much about
geography, but the closest mountain is Mount Leikaku, right over there."
"Thank you," Akane said, turning.
"Be careful," the woman warned. "It's packed with bandits."
***********
The figure in the trees pulled some paper out of his pocket, eyeing Akane's large
backpack.
***********
***********
"Um," Ranma said from his horse. "Chichiri left."
"Damn!" Nuriko shouted. "I'd go back, but that would take too much time..."
"I'm huuuuuuungry." Miaka was practically falling off her and Nuriko's horse.
"Decision made," Nuriko stated. "There's a town up ahead."
***********
***********
Akane had been wandering for quite some time now, and was beginning to lose
hope. She had no idea where she was, and no idea why she had wandered into
a forest. Either way, she was tired, and when fangs glimmered in the distance,
she made a mistake and ran to greet the owner of the fangs.
"Ryoga!"
The figure gave a grin and hoisted Akane over his shoulder, leaping into the
night sky.
***********
Akane awoke in a small room, and felt ropes around her wrists. She was glad
she wasn't gagged, because if she had, she wouldn't have been able to do the
following:
The figure entered the room, scratching his head. Before he even had a chance
to spea-
"BAKABAKABAKABAKABAKABAKABAKABAKA!!!!!!!!!!!"
Man, that felt good! Akane thought. She could now make out the appearance
of her captor. Flame-red hair flew wildly around his face, reaching golden eyes
that had a touch of mischeviousness. He smirked, with a fang poking out over
his bottom lip. He was dressed simply without his trenchcoat, in a plain white
shirt and beige pants tucked into black boots. The only jewelery he wore was a
beaded necklace and earrings.
Before she knew it, the man had began fishing through her backpack. Out came
clothes, books, a wallet, bras-
"DON'T TOUCH THAT, YOU HENTAI!!!!!"
"What th' fuck are you talking about? I can't stand women. So why th' hell would
I want one of." He dangled the lacy yellow bra by its strap- "these??!!"
He turned it over in his hands, then reached in the bag and pulled out a rolled up
sock. "Is this a slingshot?"
Placing the sock in one of the cups, he pulled back and let it fire. "Fuckin'
Awesome!" he cried as it thunked Akane in the forehead. "I want one of these!!!"
"That's not a slingshot, you dummy!"
"Yeah? Then what the fuck is it, then?"
"It's-" Akane blushed. "-a brassiere. Women use it to.to."
He tossed the bra on the floor and shrugged. "Whatever. If it's got something to
do with women, I don't want to have anything to do with it."
He fished out a package of instant ramen, flipping it over. "What the fuck is
this?"
"Instant ramen. You put it in boiling water and eat it."
The man sighed. "You got anything valuable in there?" He gestured at the bag.
Akane shook her head.
"Damn! And I thought strange looking people were usually loaded!"
Akane kicked him.
"Owwwww!" He wailed. "Figgers. Another reason I hate women."
"So what? I hate men."
He looked at her. "Good. Hey, if I untie you, don't go tellin' on me or nothin', k?"
Akane nodded. "I'm Akane Tendo."
He looked up from untying her hands. "Genrou. Call me anything else an' I'll kill
ya."
As it so happened, Genrou was fascinated by the instant ramen. He was also
unsuspecting when Akane offered to make some, and baffled when she got all
excited.
***********
***********
Miaka plopped down a sack of money on the table. "Give us lots of food, we
have the money!"
"Um, Miaka," Nuriko whispered. "Maybe that's not such a good idea."
"Of course it is," Miaka chirped. "We have more than enough to pay for it."
"What I mean is, if they see we've got cash, well, you know, and there's lots of
bandits around here and all."
Man! Ranma thought. Nabiki would have her head! He went back to
observing the conversation between Miaka and Nuriko. "Why are you so damn
cheerful? You don't have to pretend!!"
CRACK! Nuriko had broken the table.
***********
"Yay!! Food! Let's eat!"
Ranma gazed at all the food that Miaka had ordered for them, and began filling
his plate, shoveling it into his mouth and repeating, while Miaka did the same,
except she skipped step one. Nuriko managed to grab a bowl of rice and some
potstickers.
"Great," Nuriko mused. "TWO people with bottomless stomaches."
It wasn't long before Miaka and Ranma had cleared the table, Miaka keeling
over. "Miaka!" Nuriko cried. "Food poisoning!"
A fat ugly man who appeared to be a waiter pulled a knife out of his pocket and
swung it down, barely allowing Nuriko to catch it. Nuriko lay on the floor, knife
clenched between his palms. Ranma dove for the man, but another caught him,
holding a knife up to his forehead. If it had been Kuno with a bokken, Ranma
could have beaten him easily, but he had little experience with actual swords.
He stood there in fear, until one swinging flash of silver cut both men off. Behind
them stood the emperor Hotohori, dressed in common clothes, his long chestnut
hair fastened with a tie at his back.
"Hotohori-sama!" Nuriko cried, glomping onto the man that had saved his life.
And the bandits took that moment to capture them.
***********
***********
Akane sighed. Genrou was leaning out the window, throwing up. She didn't want
to kick him in the face like she usually did to Ranma, she actually felt sorry for
the poor guy.
Ranma. I never thought I'd miss him. And I have no idea where I am.
Genrou shrugged on his trenchcoat. "I'm going out for a while. Goin' back to th'
hideout."
And with that, he leaped out the door.
***********
***********
"Knock-knock." "Who's dere?" "It's Kouji, with one of the keptured girls for th'
boss." "Oh, Kouji, so nice t' see ya, come right in." "Thenk you."
Miaka looked up at the navy haired bandit talking to himself. Opening the door,
he shoved her into the room, then promptly shut it and left.
***********
"Exactly how did we get ourselves into this?" Nuriko whispered to Hotohori.
"We're in a room full of drunk bandits, who happen to think we're both GIRLS?"
"They recognize true beauty," Hotohori replied in a falsetto voice from across the
table. "Of COURSE, with a face like mine, it would be hard not to."
"Of course, your majesty." Nuriko loved the man, but he was a bit vain
sometimes. "Hey, where'd they take Ranma?"
"No idea," replied Hotohori, as a very female Ranma walked in with her hair
loose and hanging down over her shoulders.
"Hey boys," she cooed. "Who wants to get me a drink?"
"I think I'm going to be sick," Hotohori mumbled under his breath as dozens of
bandits threw themselves at Ranma's feet.
"One at a time boys, one at a time."
"Ranma!" Nuriko called. "Lead them over here!"
"No thanks!" Ranma replied. "I'm doing it my way!" And with a large football
kick, she sent them flying towards Nuriko, who slammed them into the wall with
a table.
"You are.men?" one of the bandits said in awe.
"Thank you, captain obvious."
************
"Yummy.double yummy. alright!"
Miaka slowly inched away from the fat pervert who was eyeing her body. Ok,
Miaka, you can do this. Remember, Hotohori, Nuriko, and Ranma's situation is
probably a lot worse than yours.
"'Ey Eiken. Seems you've found yourself a bride already." Standing in the
windowsill, his face silhouetted in the moonlight, was a lanky youth with flame-
red hair.
"You got it all wrong!" Miaka cried. "I'm not his bride!"
"Miaka!" Miaka turned to the door, seeing Hotohori, Ranma, and Nuriko with his
fist in the disassembled door. Nuriko promptly removed the door from his fist,
and proceeded to show off just how strong he was, by picking up random
bandits, and tossing them over his head.
From behind the stranger, wolves leapt out. They lunged on Nuriko, Hotohori,
and Ranma, attacking them. Hotohori sliced one with his sword, to reveal a piece
of paper in its place, cut in half.
The stranger took these moments of distraction to leap out of the
window, Miaka slung over his shoulder.
"PUT ME DOWN!!!" Akane could swear she heard a girl's voice, and sure enough,
Genrou soon landed with a girl on his back. He sighed and set her down.
"Holy fuck! D'ya think ya coulda screamed just a bit louder??!!"
The girl responded with a high-pitched shriek, and Akane covered her ears. "I
think that was a rhetorical question."
"Nani? Reh - toh- ree- call? What's that?"
"A question that's not supposed to be answered."
"Oh." The girl smiled, noticing her. "Did he kidnap you, too?"
Akane nodded. "Yeah, kinda. But I'm kinda lost here, so he's helping me out."
Genrou lit an oil lamp, and Akane saw the girl squinting.
"I'm Miaka Yuuki," the girl replied.
Akane extended her hand. "Akane Tendo."
Miaka thought for a moment. "Akane tendo. somehow that name sounds
familiar." A lightbulb went off in her head. " You're Ranma's fianc‚e!"
Before Miaka could react, Akane had rushed over to her and was gripping her
shirt. "How do you know Ranma??!!" She demanded.
"A-A-Akane, let me breathe."
Akane loosened her grip. "He was right when he said you were a violent girl,"
Miaka said, panting.
'He said that about me?' Akane thought.
"Any ways, while we were in Kutou, he kinda fell into a pond at the palace and
Nuriko rescued him. He said he was from my world."
"Where is he now?"
"Back at the bandit place with Hotohori and Nuriko and a few dozen drunk and
violent bandits."
"So," Akane said, taking this all into thought. "You're from Tokyo, too?"
"Yup!" Miaka chirped. "I'm Suzaku no Miko! I gotta find the seven seishi of
Suzaku and then make three wishes!!"
"Ok," Akane said, not quite understanding all of that.
"Hey, that reminds me," Miaka said. "Mr. Bandit-guy, do you have any symbols
on your body that swell up an' grow?"
"No!!" Genrou said from the corner, still feeling quite nauseous after eating
Akane's cooking.
"Knock-knock." "Who's dere?" "It's Kouji." "Oh, Kouji, so nice t'see ya, sorry fer
ingnorin' ya back at the place." "Dat's okay."
The door opened and Miaka recognized the navy haired bandit from the hideout.
As soon as Genrou saw him, the two linked arms and ran around in circles, the
two girls staring at them, bewildered.
"I have seen a lot of crazy shit since I came her, but that tops it all."
Ranma stood in the doorcase, now male and grinning wickedly.
*****YAY!! Another chapter done. How'd you like that one? I'm debating
whether or not to do the whole mitsukake/shouka thing. I might not even do the
whole evil tamahome thing. What happens depends on you. Give me your
ideas!!! Things that definitely will happen: Nuriko NOT dying, Happosai's
encounter with Soi, some ranma/akane romance, Hotohori chopping up Kuno's
bokken, Miaka and Akane cooking dinner, and Ranma freaking out about Tama-
neko.*****
two. Thanks to all my reviewers; Kaoru Kamiya, Chiad, Gami-chan, Yameno
Tenshi, Hime Pisa, *Azumi Yui*, Demos the Battousai, Sailor Lala no Baka (I've
know her since grade 3. I have a right to say that. Especially since it's true!),
Ryuen, DemonicCatGirl, The Demon Princess, Chibi_ukyou, Abby, and Lanen. I
hope everyone likes chapter to!
Selph*****
Great.More Wierdos
Chapter Two
By Selphine
"OUCH!!!" Akane landed on the hard dirt road, in the middle of someplace that
was definitely NOT Jusenkyo. Great, she thought. Where the hell am I?
She stood up, dusting the dirt off her skirt, and looked around. People hurried
around the marketplace, wearing clothes that somewhat resembled Ranma's.
China? She glanced again, and noticed no strollers, hi-tech message boards,
or trendy clothing stores. ANCIENT China??!!
She sighed, and picked up her fallen backpack, flicking a bug off of it. Slinging it
on her shoulder, she gripped the straps with both hands, and began to walk.
***********
A figure in a trenchcoat watched Akane from the trees, grinning like the drunk
idiot he was.
***********
"Um, excuse me, miss, but could you tell me where jusenkyo is?" Akane tapped
an elegant woman on the shoulder.
"Jusenkyo?" The woman repeated.
"Yeah," Akane replied. "Jusenkyo." The woman had no clue. "Drowned springs?"
she supplied. "In the Bayankala Mountain range?"
The woman thought for a second, then replied. "I don't know much about
geography, but the closest mountain is Mount Leikaku, right over there."
"Thank you," Akane said, turning.
"Be careful," the woman warned. "It's packed with bandits."
***********
The figure in the trees pulled some paper out of his pocket, eyeing Akane's large
backpack.
***********
***********
"Um," Ranma said from his horse. "Chichiri left."
"Damn!" Nuriko shouted. "I'd go back, but that would take too much time..."
"I'm huuuuuuungry." Miaka was practically falling off her and Nuriko's horse.
"Decision made," Nuriko stated. "There's a town up ahead."
***********
***********
Akane had been wandering for quite some time now, and was beginning to lose
hope. She had no idea where she was, and no idea why she had wandered into
a forest. Either way, she was tired, and when fangs glimmered in the distance,
she made a mistake and ran to greet the owner of the fangs.
"Ryoga!"
The figure gave a grin and hoisted Akane over his shoulder, leaping into the
night sky.
***********
Akane awoke in a small room, and felt ropes around her wrists. She was glad
she wasn't gagged, because if she had, she wouldn't have been able to do the
following:
The figure entered the room, scratching his head. Before he even had a chance
to spea-
"BAKABAKABAKABAKABAKABAKABAKABAKA!!!!!!!!!!!"
Man, that felt good! Akane thought. She could now make out the appearance
of her captor. Flame-red hair flew wildly around his face, reaching golden eyes
that had a touch of mischeviousness. He smirked, with a fang poking out over
his bottom lip. He was dressed simply without his trenchcoat, in a plain white
shirt and beige pants tucked into black boots. The only jewelery he wore was a
beaded necklace and earrings.
Before she knew it, the man had began fishing through her backpack. Out came
clothes, books, a wallet, bras-
"DON'T TOUCH THAT, YOU HENTAI!!!!!"
"What th' fuck are you talking about? I can't stand women. So why th' hell would
I want one of." He dangled the lacy yellow bra by its strap- "these??!!"
He turned it over in his hands, then reached in the bag and pulled out a rolled up
sock. "Is this a slingshot?"
Placing the sock in one of the cups, he pulled back and let it fire. "Fuckin'
Awesome!" he cried as it thunked Akane in the forehead. "I want one of these!!!"
"That's not a slingshot, you dummy!"
"Yeah? Then what the fuck is it, then?"
"It's-" Akane blushed. "-a brassiere. Women use it to.to."
He tossed the bra on the floor and shrugged. "Whatever. If it's got something to
do with women, I don't want to have anything to do with it."
He fished out a package of instant ramen, flipping it over. "What the fuck is
this?"
"Instant ramen. You put it in boiling water and eat it."
The man sighed. "You got anything valuable in there?" He gestured at the bag.
Akane shook her head.
"Damn! And I thought strange looking people were usually loaded!"
Akane kicked him.
"Owwwww!" He wailed. "Figgers. Another reason I hate women."
"So what? I hate men."
He looked at her. "Good. Hey, if I untie you, don't go tellin' on me or nothin', k?"
Akane nodded. "I'm Akane Tendo."
He looked up from untying her hands. "Genrou. Call me anything else an' I'll kill
ya."
As it so happened, Genrou was fascinated by the instant ramen. He was also
unsuspecting when Akane offered to make some, and baffled when she got all
excited.
***********
***********
Miaka plopped down a sack of money on the table. "Give us lots of food, we
have the money!"
"Um, Miaka," Nuriko whispered. "Maybe that's not such a good idea."
"Of course it is," Miaka chirped. "We have more than enough to pay for it."
"What I mean is, if they see we've got cash, well, you know, and there's lots of
bandits around here and all."
Man! Ranma thought. Nabiki would have her head! He went back to
observing the conversation between Miaka and Nuriko. "Why are you so damn
cheerful? You don't have to pretend!!"
CRACK! Nuriko had broken the table.
***********
"Yay!! Food! Let's eat!"
Ranma gazed at all the food that Miaka had ordered for them, and began filling
his plate, shoveling it into his mouth and repeating, while Miaka did the same,
except she skipped step one. Nuriko managed to grab a bowl of rice and some
potstickers.
"Great," Nuriko mused. "TWO people with bottomless stomaches."
It wasn't long before Miaka and Ranma had cleared the table, Miaka keeling
over. "Miaka!" Nuriko cried. "Food poisoning!"
A fat ugly man who appeared to be a waiter pulled a knife out of his pocket and
swung it down, barely allowing Nuriko to catch it. Nuriko lay on the floor, knife
clenched between his palms. Ranma dove for the man, but another caught him,
holding a knife up to his forehead. If it had been Kuno with a bokken, Ranma
could have beaten him easily, but he had little experience with actual swords.
He stood there in fear, until one swinging flash of silver cut both men off. Behind
them stood the emperor Hotohori, dressed in common clothes, his long chestnut
hair fastened with a tie at his back.
"Hotohori-sama!" Nuriko cried, glomping onto the man that had saved his life.
And the bandits took that moment to capture them.
***********
***********
Akane sighed. Genrou was leaning out the window, throwing up. She didn't want
to kick him in the face like she usually did to Ranma, she actually felt sorry for
the poor guy.
Ranma. I never thought I'd miss him. And I have no idea where I am.
Genrou shrugged on his trenchcoat. "I'm going out for a while. Goin' back to th'
hideout."
And with that, he leaped out the door.
***********
***********
"Knock-knock." "Who's dere?" "It's Kouji, with one of the keptured girls for th'
boss." "Oh, Kouji, so nice t' see ya, come right in." "Thenk you."
Miaka looked up at the navy haired bandit talking to himself. Opening the door,
he shoved her into the room, then promptly shut it and left.
***********
"Exactly how did we get ourselves into this?" Nuriko whispered to Hotohori.
"We're in a room full of drunk bandits, who happen to think we're both GIRLS?"
"They recognize true beauty," Hotohori replied in a falsetto voice from across the
table. "Of COURSE, with a face like mine, it would be hard not to."
"Of course, your majesty." Nuriko loved the man, but he was a bit vain
sometimes. "Hey, where'd they take Ranma?"
"No idea," replied Hotohori, as a very female Ranma walked in with her hair
loose and hanging down over her shoulders.
"Hey boys," she cooed. "Who wants to get me a drink?"
"I think I'm going to be sick," Hotohori mumbled under his breath as dozens of
bandits threw themselves at Ranma's feet.
"One at a time boys, one at a time."
"Ranma!" Nuriko called. "Lead them over here!"
"No thanks!" Ranma replied. "I'm doing it my way!" And with a large football
kick, she sent them flying towards Nuriko, who slammed them into the wall with
a table.
"You are.men?" one of the bandits said in awe.
"Thank you, captain obvious."
************
"Yummy.double yummy. alright!"
Miaka slowly inched away from the fat pervert who was eyeing her body. Ok,
Miaka, you can do this. Remember, Hotohori, Nuriko, and Ranma's situation is
probably a lot worse than yours.
"'Ey Eiken. Seems you've found yourself a bride already." Standing in the
windowsill, his face silhouetted in the moonlight, was a lanky youth with flame-
red hair.
"You got it all wrong!" Miaka cried. "I'm not his bride!"
"Miaka!" Miaka turned to the door, seeing Hotohori, Ranma, and Nuriko with his
fist in the disassembled door. Nuriko promptly removed the door from his fist,
and proceeded to show off just how strong he was, by picking up random
bandits, and tossing them over his head.
From behind the stranger, wolves leapt out. They lunged on Nuriko, Hotohori,
and Ranma, attacking them. Hotohori sliced one with his sword, to reveal a piece
of paper in its place, cut in half.
The stranger took these moments of distraction to leap out of the
window, Miaka slung over his shoulder.
"PUT ME DOWN!!!" Akane could swear she heard a girl's voice, and sure enough,
Genrou soon landed with a girl on his back. He sighed and set her down.
"Holy fuck! D'ya think ya coulda screamed just a bit louder??!!"
The girl responded with a high-pitched shriek, and Akane covered her ears. "I
think that was a rhetorical question."
"Nani? Reh - toh- ree- call? What's that?"
"A question that's not supposed to be answered."
"Oh." The girl smiled, noticing her. "Did he kidnap you, too?"
Akane nodded. "Yeah, kinda. But I'm kinda lost here, so he's helping me out."
Genrou lit an oil lamp, and Akane saw the girl squinting.
"I'm Miaka Yuuki," the girl replied.
Akane extended her hand. "Akane Tendo."
Miaka thought for a moment. "Akane tendo. somehow that name sounds
familiar." A lightbulb went off in her head. " You're Ranma's fianc‚e!"
Before Miaka could react, Akane had rushed over to her and was gripping her
shirt. "How do you know Ranma??!!" She demanded.
"A-A-Akane, let me breathe."
Akane loosened her grip. "He was right when he said you were a violent girl,"
Miaka said, panting.
'He said that about me?' Akane thought.
"Any ways, while we were in Kutou, he kinda fell into a pond at the palace and
Nuriko rescued him. He said he was from my world."
"Where is he now?"
"Back at the bandit place with Hotohori and Nuriko and a few dozen drunk and
violent bandits."
"So," Akane said, taking this all into thought. "You're from Tokyo, too?"
"Yup!" Miaka chirped. "I'm Suzaku no Miko! I gotta find the seven seishi of
Suzaku and then make three wishes!!"
"Ok," Akane said, not quite understanding all of that.
"Hey, that reminds me," Miaka said. "Mr. Bandit-guy, do you have any symbols
on your body that swell up an' grow?"
"No!!" Genrou said from the corner, still feeling quite nauseous after eating
Akane's cooking.
"Knock-knock." "Who's dere?" "It's Kouji." "Oh, Kouji, so nice t'see ya, sorry fer
ingnorin' ya back at the place." "Dat's okay."
The door opened and Miaka recognized the navy haired bandit from the hideout.
As soon as Genrou saw him, the two linked arms and ran around in circles, the
two girls staring at them, bewildered.
"I have seen a lot of crazy shit since I came her, but that tops it all."
Ranma stood in the doorcase, now male and grinning wickedly.
*****YAY!! Another chapter done. How'd you like that one? I'm debating
whether or not to do the whole mitsukake/shouka thing. I might not even do the
whole evil tamahome thing. What happens depends on you. Give me your
ideas!!! Things that definitely will happen: Nuriko NOT dying, Happosai's
encounter with Soi, some ranma/akane romance, Hotohori chopping up Kuno's
bokken, Miaka and Akane cooking dinner, and Ranma freaking out about Tama-
neko.*****
