"So this is how it ends..." Heero looked tiredly at his friends, who stood in a semi-circle around his bed.

Duo shook his head wildly. "No, don't say that! You're not going to die; I won't let you die!" But the hope in his eyes had died down, and something inside him told him it was time he let go.

"Duo..." The pilot of Wing shook his head softly. "No one lives forever; it's my time now, my time to leave."
Quatre sighed softly as he placed a hand on the American's shoulder. "There's no way out of it…if there was, the doctors would've saved him by now."

Turning misty eyes to Quatre, Duo swallowed hard before running out of the room, trying hard to keep in his tears. The others watched him disappear beyond the whitewashed door and into the hall. "I'm sorry..." Heero whispered after him, closing his eyes.

"There's nothing you need to be sorry about, Heero. It's not your fault," Trowa reassured him, though inside, his soul was screaming at the pale boy in the bed before him.

Heero sighed and turned his head onto the side. "I'm sorry," he said again softly...then the line on the monitor went flat.

An alarm went off as the 'beeps' of the monitor died and some nurses immediately ran in, their faces blank and dull. One of the white-dressed nurses walked over to where the three were standing, staring at the bed and its occupant. "Please leave this room," she said, nodding them out. They heard the door shut as they exited.

When they were in the corridor, Quatre and Trowa shared a sorrow-filled glance as Duo came up to them. "He's dead, isn't he?" he asked.

Quatre looked at him sadly and nodded. "He said he was sorry."

Duo exploded, the tears he'd been holding back suddenly bursting out of his eyes all at once. "SORRY?! For what? What the hell does he have to sorry for? He died, damn it! What's he to be sorry about?" Duo sank into a chair and buried his face in his hands, his shoulders shaking with silent sobs. "He wasn't supposed to die. He's too young!" he muttered, barely audible.

"I know." Even Wufei looked downcast, his usual scowl gone from his face. "But it wasn't as if though he had a choice..." A sniffle came out from between Duo's hands. "Duo…"

Even though they'd all been pretty good friends with Heero, his death had been the hardest on Duo, who had dubbed him 'best friend of a lifetime' a year or two ago. Now, lives seemed so short, so useless. To Duo, Heero was the only guy that understood the American. Oh sure, he called Duo idiot at times, but he always listened...he never failed to be there. Until now.

Quatre looked at Duo's disheartened state and his heart ached. "Come on Duo. Let's go," he said softly. He glanced at Trowa, who nodded. He and Wufei would stay and take care of things at the hospital…Duo had to leave first. Quatre helped Duo to his feet and allowed him to half-lean on him as they walked down the hall, to the car.


~*~*~


Quatre opened the front door and motioned for Duo to enter first. Carefully avoiding the other's eyes, Duo walked in dishearteningly, looking down at the floor. "Are you hungry?" Quatre asked. Duo shook his head. "Are you sure? We have some new ice cream in the refrigerator." Duo shook his head again, and Quatre really started to worry. Duo never turned down ice cream…

Seeming to suddenly realize Quatre's discomfort, Duo looked up and forced a smile onto his face. "I'm alright. Really. Don't worry."

"Of course…" Quatre sighed. "I'll be in the drawing room, then. If you need anything, come up and find me, alright?" Duo nodded and, with one last look at him, Quatre walked upstairs.

Duo watched him disappear around the corner before turning back the way he'd just come and, opening the door quietly, slipped outside.


~*~*~


With his braid tucked securely between his shirt and jacket and his eyes shaded by the cap, Duo made his way down the grassy lawn of the hospital. Always check your facts, someone had once told him, and now he was going to do just that. He pushed open the door and walked into the hospital. The smell of the sterilized rooms hit him hard, like a punch in the stomach, and he gasped, suddenly nauseated. He struggled for a few seconds with his sense of smell and the urge to run to the nearest bathroom before advancing again to the counter.

The nurse currently on duty looked up as Duo walked over. "Hello, can I help you?" he asked pleasantly.

Duo nodded. "Can you please tell me the room number for Heero Yuy? I'm a close friend of his, and I'd like to see him."

"Sure. Please wait a minute." The nurse turned to his computer and typed in a few quick words. A slight frown appeared on his face. He typed in a few more words and the frown deepened. After awhile, he faced Duo again. "I'm sorry sir, but he's no longer with us…"

Duo smiled. "So he's checked out? That's great!"

The nurse nodded, shook his head, nodded again, and finally settled for shrugging. "I'm sorry sir… He's checked out, yes, but not…in a good way."

Duo's heart nearly stopped. "What do you mean, 'not in a good way'?"

"He's dead, sir."

"No." Duo shook his head violently. "No. He can't be dead!"

The nurse looked at him, pity in his eyes. "I'm sorry sir…"

He was creating a scene… Besides, he'd already known Heero was dead; he'd just come here to make a fool of himself… Duo took in a deep breath. "Yes, yes, of course… I'm sorry for bothering you." Then, still in a state of shock, he left the hospital.


~*~*~


Duo opened the front door and walked back into Quatre's house. 'Heero's really dead…' he thought numbly. 'He's dead.' Strange. He didn't really feel anything, not sadness nor anger. Just…nothing.

The sound of sobs broke suddenly him out of his reverie and he looked up, startled. Quatre was sitting on a couch in the living room, a box of Kleenex on one side and Trowa on the other. "It's alright," Duo heard Trowa say. "Come on Quatre…"

"But…Heero. Heero, he's…" Quatre blew noisily into a tissue. "He's DEAD!"

Although he knew he should probably be acting the way Quatre was, Duo still didn't feel anything. There was a huge gawking hole inside of him where he felt his heart should've been. It seemed to suck everything away, leaving Duo empty and numb.

Trowa looked up just then and saw Duo standing at the doorway. "Duo…" Quatre looked up at the name, his eyes rimmed with red and his face dirty and streaked with tears.

"Duo…"

Duo tried to smile. "I'm alright, guys. I already told you, I'm fine." He turned around and walked up the stairs, leaving two boys watching him in slight bewilderment. 'But am I? Am I?'

As soon as he was in the safety of his room, he slumped down onto his bed and curled up into a tight ball. 'Am I alright?' He closed his eyes, wishing for oblivion. He knew from past experiences that unconsciousness took everything away, and that was just what he wanted right then. Nothing.

Within minutes, he got his wish and, still curled up tightly on the bed, Duo fell asleep.