Disclaimer: Yeah, well, Ok, so I forget this thing a lot

Disclaimer: Yeah, well, Ok, so I forget this thing a lot. I think I have it something like every other chapter. Does anyone know if I have to put one in all the time? If so… *looks around suspiciously * I know you lawyers are hiding under the computer desk! Come out with your hands up! I've got a castor and I know how to use it! *pleads that they don't call her bluff. They don't. Grr-ing, the lawyers stalk out the door * Hehe. Anyway, I don't own OLS, so scoot on down to the story, K?

Do you know how long it takes to make a decision? A nanosecond? No, smaller. A picosecond? No, smaller still. Whatever the speed of thought is, that immeasurable amount of time, that is how long it takes. That increment of time is what can change someone's world, or the universe at large. Never underestimate the power of a decision, because the backlash that could come from it is just as likely to help as to hurt. Then again, the ramifications of a decision are all in how you take it. What one may see as the best thing to do may seem to others as the worst kind of last resort….

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

                It was Suzuka's turn to watch Jim in the makeshift sickbay. Watching both man and boy intently, she could see the inner war going on in the one who was conscious. It was strange; she never realized how much she and Jim really were alike. They had both lost their families, though Jim had never volunteered how, and they had both found a new one in the crew of the Outlaw Star. Like a sentinel, she stood watch over the people that she…well…she cared about. It was hard for her to imagine, but she had to admit to herself that she would, without a second thought, lay down her life for one of these people.

                As she watched Jim's eyes shift, as if looking for an answer from the universe, she couldn't help but empathize with the boy. He had been through so much that slowly watching the vitals of his Aniki lower was a torture beyond belief. Still, he sat there and watched them, doing penance for a sin he didn't even commit. He started as he looked up at the monitors again.

                "Suzuka, Gene won't make it, will he?" Jim turned his drawn face to the one person that he felt would give him a strait answer. Everyone else tried to placate him, tell him it would be Ok, tell him everything but the truth. He hoped Suzuka would be different.

                Suzuka knew what Jim wanted, but wasn't sure if she could give it to him. "I think…I think that." She hesitated, and then decided that putting a veil over the truth would only make it hurt to uncover later. "No Jim, I don't think that he will. He's going to quickly now and…" As strong as she was, Suzuka couldn't finish the rest. Not for the first time Suzuka wished that Melfina or Aisha were there to comfort the distraught boy. She had never been one that cared much about the feelings of others, but now she felt that she should be doing something to ease the pain. Unluckily for her, Melfina was on the bridge, navigating the ship to their destination, and Aisha was making sure that she wasn't alone. No one could afford to be an island at a time like this.

                "Thank you, Suzuka." Jim answered tiredly. "Thank you for telling me the truth." Then, much to Suzuka's surprise, Jim stood up from his vigil in the chair next to the bed.

                "And where are you going?" she asked. She was half-way frightened of the answer, something she had been precious few times in her life, but she still had to know.

                "I'm going to be right back. I just can't sit still any longer. I'm going to see if I can figure out how our cargo works." Jim began to wring his hands tightly together, "I just can't do nothing."

                Suzuka nodded, understanding fully that this may help release some of his feelings of helplessness. "I will help you." She stated. Even if this was a ploy to leave her and be by himself, it wouldn't work.

                With a shrug that was so uncharacteristic of Jim at a time like this, he replied coldly, "Do what you want." What Suzuka wanted, along with everyone else in the ship, was for Gene to miraculously heal, and for Jim to smile again. She wanted all of them to smile again. Still, knowing that what she wanted was impossible, she settled for following Jim out of the door towards where they had stored their cargo.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

                "Aisha, do you think that Jim is alright?" Melfina projected from her tank. Aisha was sprawled out in her usual seat, to the left of where Gene usually sat, and started at the bio-androids question.

                "Well, it's hard to say with humans. Jim's a tough little cookie, I'm sure he'll make it through." Even as the words came out of her mouth, she could hear her own uncertainty in them.

                "You don't really believe that do you?" Melfina's voice held a tinge of fright.

                "Um…look Mel. Jim won't be the same after this. Even a strong Ctarl-Ctarl wouldn't, but I know that he will make it through somehow." 'Either that or he'll do something drastic,' Aisha thought. Just the thought of it brought a shiver to cover her.

                "I hope you're right Aisha. I know I will never be the same." Melfina looked on the brink of tears. In one of her rare philosophical moments, Aisha answered,

                "None of us will."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

                It had been almost an hour since Suzuka had help lug the 10 pound piece of machinery up to Gene's room. Ever since then Jim had been tinkering away at it, while Suzuka could only watch. Every time Gene's vitals dropped, even the slightest bit, Jim seemed to have a sixth sense about it. He would look up, frown, look at his partner sadly, and return to his work. Suzuka wished for a reprieve from the cloud of oppression that was blanketed in the room, but with everyone else doing something just as essential as she was, there was no way that she could leave Jim alone.

                "Jim, you haven't eaten in almost 24 hours. Why don't you take a break and find something?" Suzuka asked softly. She didn't mean to intrude on his hard work, but his health had to come first. Getting your mind off of something horrifying was one thing, starving yourself was quite another.

                "I'm not hungry," was Jim's repetitive reply. Every time she had asked before, she had gotten the same answer. Dragging the youngster to the kitchen was not something that she took pride in, but she knew she would do it if she was forced. That was one of the only threats that actually got through to Jim these days.

                "That is quite impossible. You're body needs more than just water and whatever Melfina, Aisha and I can force down your throat. You will go have something to eat." She stated bluntly. Jim looked up at her with eyes as wide and blue as the sky.

                "I can't leave him Suzuka. What if something happens while I'm gone?" He looked so anxious and alone that a motherly instinct that Suzuka didn't even know she had welled up in her. She suppressed it.

                "I will stay to make sure that nothing happens." She tried to keep her voice steady.

                "It's not the same. Why don't you go and get something and I stay here?" Jim asked. At one point in time Suzuka would have taken out her bokken and dueled with someone who thought that she should do such a lowly thing. Now though, it didn't even occur to her. As she mulled it over, she couldn't help but consider the fact that Jim might be trying to get rid of her. Even as the idea flitted in her mind, she couldn't brush it away. Reasonably she told herself that Jim would never do something as drastic as her mind came up with while she was gone. These were not reasonable times though, and Jim was no longer a reasonable person.

                "I don't think I can do that Jim," she closed her eyes, unaware of how Jim would take this information.

                "You don't trust me." Jim's voice held no condemnation, but when Suzuka opened her eyes she found herself unable to meet the younger bounty hunter's eyes. "You think I'm going to commit suicide or something don't you?"

                Having put it finally into the open Suzuka found that once again she could not lie. "Yes. That is something that all of us have been worried about."

                "That makes sense." Hearing Jim say that, in such a nonchalant tone made her stare. It also didn't reassure her at all. "Still, you don't have to worry, you have my word."

                Suzuka had never heard Jim give his word to anyone, and wasn't quite sure what it entailed. Even so, here your word was your bond. "Alright, but you must promise that you will stay here."

                "I do."

                "And I will hurry back."

                "Alright."

                "Goodbye, Jim."

                "Goodbye."

                Suzuka left and Jim made his final preparations.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

                It wasn't until she got back that she realized her fatal mistake. Not fatal to her, but to another. She had warmed up some of the leftover soup that Melfina had made over a week ago and they had been surviving on ever since. As she brought in the tray to what was now Jim's personal prison, she stopped short. The tray clattered to the floor, soup splattering everywhere.

                "Gilliam! Call Aisha and Melfina down here right now! This is an emergency!" Suzuka yelled at the ships main computer while dodging the various pieces of furniture that scattered in the room as she rushed in.

                "What is the problem Suzuka?" Gilliam inquired. He had already notified all personnel on the bridge, but one thing that he was allowed in his programming was curiosity about what was going on inside the ship.

                "Just tell them!" Suzuka commanded, very unlike herself. In normal high-stress circumstances she kept a level head, but this was a notable exception.

                When she had entered the room, the first thing she had noticed was that Jim lay partially collapsed at the head of Gene's bed. Half of him was slowly slipping off the chair, while the upper half lay sideways on the mattress. At first she had thought that Jim had simply been keeping watch when he fell asleep. It was a second later when she picked up on the blinking lights and soft, purr-like humming of the device next to him. With a start she remembered when Jim was trying to explain what the device did.

                "It transfers the life force from one person to another, almost as if it were some kind of gas that keeps the human body working. In a way it is. This apparatus conducts that energy like a pump from one person to another. How it does it I don't really know, but it really is amazing. I wish I could find out how something like this was imagined." Jim explained simply.

                "Could it be harmful?" Suzuka had asked.

                "Not really, I'm sure there's a safety that makes sure that someone doesn't give to much life energy. What would be the point if it didn't?" He had answered quickly, to quickly in retrospect.

                It was then that Aisha skidded into the doorway, followed by an anxious looking Melfina.

                "What's wrong?! What happened?!" Aisha bounded into the room. Suzuka ignored her; since she was busily try to cut the flow of energy. She noticed a band around both Jim and Gene's arms, as if they were getting their blood pressure taken. Following the phosphorescent blue tubes that led from both of them too the machine, she immediately deducted the purpose they served.

                "I don't have time to talk. Melfina, I need you to get that thing off of Gene's arm, right now." Suzuka emphasized the last two words. Silently Melfina rushed toward the bed and struggled with the band. Her eyes were tearing as she began to realize the implications of the situation, and with one last desperate tug she ripped the band from his arm.

                Suzuka had done the same to Jim not 2 seconds earlier and she had noticed that the glowing, blue 'wires' were actually tubes that carried the life force: Jim's life force. Aisha had finally put two and two together and her ears drooped as she asked softly,

                "Are they Ok?" It took Suzuka every ounce of courage to put her fingers to Jim's neck to look for a pulse.

                "Huh? What's going on?" A deeper voice asked this time and all three girls couldn't help but turn to the source. It was if they were all puppets that were on the same rod.

                "Gene! But that means…." Melfina couldn't finish the statement; her voice at one time so beautiful now only conveyed pain. Gene didn't wait for an answer,

                "Hey, what's wrong with Jim. Hey Jim! Wake up there buddy!" he reached over strongly and messed up Jim's hair, thinking the annoyance would rouse his partner. It was only when Gene touched his young protégé that he realized how cold the young boy seemed. He looked at Suzuka, "What happened…?"

                "I…." It was to no avail. Suzuka couldn't answer.

                "No…" Gene couldn't take the implications of the silence. Awareness of what had happened to him, and what Jim must have done though he had no idea how, crashed down on him unrelentingly. He shook his younger partner. "Jim! Jim! Jim…!"

*cringes * so what happens next? Is Jim dead? That's what I can't decide. You'll have to tell me what you want, or it'll be up to fate. (In other words, I'll flip a coin.) Please don't hurt me for leaving you hanging, but I need help with where you want me to go! The only way I'll know what you want is if you review or e-mail me (trekkie606@aol.com) until the next chapter…ja!