youreyes4 Yeah, I'm digging this story up after six months. I decided I still like it and had some new ideas for it, so here it is, once again.
New disclaimer: Besides the characters being Jonathan's, the song "Rhyme and Reason" is Adam Pascal's. "Never Make Me Cry" is Fleetwood Mac's, written by the beautiful Christine McVie. I don't know much about the record industry, if that isn't obvious, so I'm kinda pulling stuff out of nowhere for that part. Please read and review…I really want to know what people think about the last section…

"Alright, we'll see you soon," I hear Mark say as he leads Maureen and Joanne out of the loft. He walks back toward the couch, hands in his pockets. "Well, that was fun."
"Yeah, I had a good time," I say absentmindedly, focusing on my guitar again, fine-picking one of my newer songs.
"Things really went ok today?" Mark asks, sitting down next to me. I notice he's worried again, he's trying again, and because I'm in a good mood, I humor him.
"Things really did go well," I say, looking into his eyes, silencing my guitar. "It's a bitch to have to fight to do it the way I want, but it's a worthy fight."
"I would think so," Mark says. We sit quietly for a minute, and I start playing again, singing under my breath.
"It's ok…to realize…brought into nothing, no one and nowhere, it's all a surprise," my voice sounds great, and I'm excited about this song, probably more than any of the others on the album. I love "Your Eyes" but it makes me weary knowing that I may be hearing it over and over, or singing to a bunch of screaming teenagers. I can't help but wonder if I really want to do that with that song. I wonder if completely changing it may be a way of keeping it sacred. The song I sang to Mimi can be a completely different entity of it. "Cause love don't need a reason, and love don't need a rhyme, I'm standing here pleading, while you discover you're right…yeah yeah yeah…oh oh oh…"
"That song is great," Mark says, his camera focused on me.
"Thanks."
"Is it going on the album?"
"Most definitely! I think it's my favorite," I say with a grin.
"You know, you really are talented, Roger," Mark says sheepishly, his face hidden behind the omnipresent camera. "During that whole time after April died, I was so worried that you were never going to realize that or act upon it. I'm so glad you're finally seeing it."
"So am I. So, you worried about that too?"
"I worried about everything," he admits. "I can't help it, Roger. I know it annoys you, but I can't help it."
"Hey, there were times I worried about you too," I say, still playing the chords to the song in tempo. Mark pulls the camera away from his face and looks at me.
"Really? When? Why?" he asks. I can tell he is surprised I'm admitting this, but he's relieved at the same time. He thinks I never noticed that he doubted our friendship but I noticed. Sometimes I made myself believe I was glad he doubted it, but deep down I wanted to prove to him how strong it was.
"Right after we met Angel, for the most part. I mean we were all together, and loving each other, but we also had our own little relationships within the family. Maureen had Joanne, Collins had Angel, I had Mimi and you had no one. And I KNEW you saw it that way. You saw that we all had each other and you had no one, and I KNEW you felt so alone. And I worried that you'd never stop feeling that way, even though we were all there for you."
"I did feel that way," Mark says sitting down next to me, the camera lying forgotten on the table. "I still feel that way."
"And I still worry about it. I worry that you're never going to see how much you mean to everyone. Yes, I admit it Mark, I'd be dead without you. I swore to myself months ago that I would never admit that, but I do. And I can tell you right now that Maureen would be lost if you weren't still in her life. Joanne has gained a great friend in you. And Collins still goes to you when he doesn't know what to do with everything," I say.
"This songwriting is good for you," Mark says with a smile.
"It's true though. And you're right. The songwriting's given me the courage to say it. I've always felt it, I've just never been able to say it."
"Well, thanks. You're my best friend, you know that right?"
"Of course I do, you dork!" I rustle his hair like a protective older brother.
"Oh, thanks!"
"Mark, I have to tell you something," I say. I'm surprised I'm so nervous about this, but I am. It came up quick and I've been putting off telling him for much longer than I should have.
"What's that?"
"I'm going to be leaving again." His face falls and he looks away. "My label thinks it would be a good idea if I do a promotional tour for the CD. I'll be leaving once it's finished, which is going to be really soon. I want to do it, Mark, and I'm going to. I know it upsets you but I can't not do this." He turns back to me, a massive grin on his face, his eyes bright.
"You're damn right you have to do it!"
"So you don't mind I'm leaving?" I ask stupidly.
"Roger, I want you to make it more than anything in this world. You have what it takes. Go show the world!" I grin and know that that is exactly what I have to do. Show the world.

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Roger's been gone. He's been touring the east coast for the past month. I miss him a lot, but I'm so glad that he's able to do this. His album came out right before the tour started, and it's selling pretty well for what it is. I'm really proud of him.
"Mark, are you almost ready?" Maureen asks me.
"Yup, just let me comb my hair!" I call. She laughs, knowing that the occasion must be special for me to actual let a comb touch my head. I run it through my mess of blond and splash a little water on it. "Ok, all set!"
"About time! And they say women take too long getting ready!" Joanne exclaims. She and Maureen are dressed nicely, as is Collins. I really tend to doubt people dress this nicely for CBGB's.
"Yeah, yeah, let's go. I don't want to be late," I say, walking out the door. We start walking briskly down Avenue B. I'm excited. I'm psyched.
"Mark, he's not going to start without us! You can slow down a little!" Maureen calls. She's power walking to keep up with me, her entire body moving.
"I know, I just want to get there!" I exclaim. I notice I feel a little nervous, if just because I haven't seen Roger on a stage in at least a year. I can't wait to hear those new songs coming from his mouth, his hands strumming the guitar.
The place is pretty full when we walk in the door. A small stage is set up toward the back, and I recognize Roger's acoustic resting up against an amp.
"Is Roger having any backup people?" Maureen asks.
"Nope, just Roge and a guitar," I say, grabbing a table close to the stage.
"Wow…sexy…" Maureen says. Roger walks out nonchalantly and sits on the stool in front of the microphone.
"Hey…I'm Roger. Some of you may know me from my earlier days, when I used to jump around like a fuckin' idiot. Not gonna happen today. I'm older and much more mellow," he grins and looks down as the audience laughs. "So, yeah, this song is called 'Rhyme and Reason', and it's my favorite." He starts the amazing guitar to the song, and his voice is pouring out of him. I can't help but watch him in awe. He looks so peaceful, so happy with what he's doing and it's hard for me to remember the last time I saw him look so good. He's wearing the same black leather pants he used to wear, but instead of a tank top, he's wearing a black turtleneck sweater. I half expect him to bring out the bongos and do some beat poetry.
"A lot of these songs are about my girlfriend…" Roger says after a few songs. "Ex-girlfriend, I should say. Well, maybe not. Anyway, she died. And that time was really tough for me because I didn't know if I wanted to record and play all these songs about her and lose the meaning of what she was to me. But my best friends, especially Mark, they made me see that I can't lose Mimi through these songs. I can just share how wonderful she is. So, this next song I wrote after a fight we had. We had a lot of trust issues, and they were really painful, but I wrote this song to prove to her that I would never cheat on her and that I really trusted her. I just wish she could have heard it." Roger starts to strum an unfamiliar melody on his guitar, softly. I realize I've never heard this song before. He starts to sing, his voice soft and gentle.

"Go and do what you want,
I know that you have the need.
You know that I'll wait, as long as it takes,
And you'll never make me, you'll never make me, you'll never make me cry.
Now, I may not mean everything, but I'm happy to have your love.
And don't worry baby, I'll be alright.
And I'll never make you, I'll never make you, I'll never make you cry.
So go and do what you want
I know that you have the need
And don't worry baby
I'll be alright
You'll never make me
You'll never make me…."

Roger's voice cracks and I see the tears start to fall down his face. "You'll never make me cry…" he whispers.