Sorry about the delay in posting. I had exams in school and then I went to camp. But anyway, I'm giving y'all two entries in one chapter as a special treat.
Dear D.J. DiRi,
I found out from my muggle relatives that the Music Television Network (MTV) recently made the opera "Carmen" into a hip hopera starring Beyonce Knowles, front woman of Destiny's Child and hot mama with perfect hair. So I've decided to write my own hip hopera. It's gonna be called "Dennis Creevay: A True British Playah." It will rival such productions as RENT and Lion King, only with a Bentley and some hos. I'll probably give the lead role to the girl who was kicked out of Destiny's Child.
I still haven't found my hot mama. Someone told me that a bitch is your male prison companion, and while I do want to spread a rumor that I've been in the pen (preferably for shooting sopmeone in the face in a bar like my hero, P. Diddy), I do think that having a male bitch would challenge my manhood.
Love,
D. Crivy
I wrote this at camp after finding out about what happened to Lil Bow Wow.
Dear Diary,
I have a few words to say about one of my heroes, a young man by the name of Lil Bow Wow. Sure, he hasn't done anything great and he probably smokes a little more weed than the average 12 year old should, but how can you not worship someone whose cousin was jiggy with Tupac and the gangstas on the west coast rap scene?
So anyway Bow, I'd just like to say that even though you've got stitches on your botty and peeps are calling you "Lil Bow Ow," you'll always be a hero to me.
Love,
D.
*Restrains the urge to say that Bow Wow is anus-riffic*
