Disclaimer : I don't own Sailormoon. You think I'd be
writing a fanfic if I did? Heh -_-;
In case you forgot or skipped part 2:
"For Chiba Mamoru, with love," Usagi read
quietly, her heart nervously beating. "May
your dreams be sweet, filled with beautiful
and fascinating places to satisfy your curious
mind."
Usagi wondered if she was reading something
personal of Mamoru's and whether it was right
for her to keep on reading. Her fingers
trembled as they refused her will to close the
book.
----
And To Change, Is It Good?
By Artemis
----
Part 3 - Ignorance Can Be A Source Of Happiness
Usagi sat on the grey carpet, still gazing at the door.
She wasn't sure if she had upset Mamoru and she felt
incredibly frustrated. He had looked at her with such
blank eyes, probably disgusted at her for invading his
privacy. The book, surely, was something personal to him.
She sighed deeply, her breath trembling. She slowly got
up and walked to her room. As Usagi approached the door,
she saw a note stuck to it.
"Some mocha ice cream if you get a little hungry.." she
read. "In the freezer by the way."
She tore the note off the door and felt incredibly guilty.
Mamoru had kindly agreed to let her stay while Tetsu was
away and here she was, taking advantage of him and his
position to be kind to her. Of course Mamoru wouldn't
have said anything about the book, because she was Tetsu's
wife and his job was on the line if he had mistreated her
in any way. She sighed as she pushed the door gently.
Usagi flopped onto her bed, feeling her wet hair on her
cheek. She had been so self centered and only thinking
about herself in her poor situation, that she hadn't
thought about him. Usagi promised herself to tell him
the truth when he came home. She felt bad lying to
somebody who was being so nice to her. Usagi rolled
over and glanced at her clock, which read 8:00. Next to
her clock was a photo frame with a photo of her and Tetsu.
She reached out and grabbed the photo frame, hugging it
tight. She closed her eyes, letting her mind fill with
thoughts about Tetsu. Would he write to her? Tell her
what he was doing and where he was? She doubted it, which
made her feel so sad. Usagi loved him, but she didn't
like feeling this doubt. Tetsu had changed and she would
have to change to either suit him, or.... not.
Mamoru sat in his car, waiting impatiently in peak hour
traffic. He tapped his fingers irritably on the wheel.
Suddenly, his phone rang. He picked it up just as the
traffic started to move.
"Tetsu!?" Mamoru shouted in surprise. "How are you?
Usagi? She's doing okay I think. Why? Where are you?"
A car swerved in front of Mamoru, irritating him even
more. The traffic stopped once more. He listened to
Tetsu tell him a few things to remember to settle
at work and not to forget to look after some projects
while he was gone. Mamoru didn't really pay attention
as he scowled at the license plate in front of him.
"Oh by the way Tetsu, why didn't you ring my house?
Usagi would have been there to get it," Mamoru queried.
"I don't particularly want to talk to her right now,
I'm a bit busy."
"But she said it was your three year anniversary
yesterday.... Didn't you do or say anything?"
"Mamoru this is none of your business. I don't have
time for this. I'll talk to you later."
Mamoru was left to hear the dial tone beeping in his
ear. He frowned at the phone, then slipped it back
in the glovebox. The traffic started to move once
more and he almost smashed into the car in front of
him out of frustration.
Usagi yawned and felt her head feeling heavy and her
eyes feeling a stabbing pain from the back of her head.
Her chest felt tight and she couldn't breathe very well.
She felt a burning sensation all over her body. Usagi
managed to sit up and that was when she felt her back
was wet and cold from her hair. She groaned and coughed.
She had slept with wet hair and now she had a fever of
some sort. Usagi managed to stand up, still feeling dizzy
and put the photo frame on the bedside table. She dragged
on a large jumper, then crawled into the bed. Usagi had
no more energy left to look at the clock so she hoped
Mamoru would come home soon. She felt so sick and groggy
that she thought she would die if she didn't take any
medicine soon. As Usagi lay there, her breaths short
and gasping, she wondered why she was staying with Mamoru.
Tetsu had mentioned him many more times than any other
colleague, but she didn't know him at all and he didn't
know her either. She had met him once before at some
dinner and he was a little cool and silent. That was
when Tetsu had been kinder to her. Usagi pulled the
covers over her head and breathed in the stale air.
When Mamoru returned from work, he found the apartment
was cold, dark and quiet. He wondered where Usagi was
and after dumping his things on the dining table, he
checked out the food he left for her in the microwave.
It had been untouched. He frowned, puzzled. Mamoru walked
over to Usagi's room. The door was closed and he could
hear nothing inside.
"U.. Usagi.... san?" he asked. "Are you here?"
Silence. He knocked on the door, then waited. Still silence.
He opened the door slowly and quietly. It was dark in her
room because the curtains had not been drawn open and only
the light from the hallway helped Mamoru to see what was
inside. He saw a small lump on the bed and raised an eyebrow.
Mamoru walked quietly over to the lump on the bed and placed
his hand carefully on it. The lump was warm. He figured it
was Usagi. Was she asleep? He gently moved the covers away
from her head, then saw that she was sweating and her breathing
was in short intervals. Straight away, Mamoru felt her forehead.
She had an incredible fever.
"Usagi san? Usagi san?" he murmured to her, trying to wake her up.
She didn't move at all.
"Can you hear me?" he whispered. "Usagi san?"
Mamoru waited for a while for a response. Usagi didn't respond in
any way. He pulled the covers off her and saw her small huddled
body. In her arms was a photo of her and Tetsu. He felt a stinging
pain in his chest. He ignored the pain and rolled Usagi over onto
her back and made sure she was lying straight and flat. She wore
her bathrobe and a jumper on top, both of which were soaked either
with water or sweat. Mamoru swore under his breath and glanced at
Usagi's sleeping face. He managed to take off her jumper, heavy
and soaked. Her face was red and the bare skin he could see was
patchy.
"It's too dark to see anything.... it doesn't matter.." he convinced
himself as his hand nervously reached over to untie the bath robe.
He tried his hardest not to look at her as he undressed her. Mamoru
dashed to his room, grabbed one of his shirts, then dashed back.
He carefully dressed her in his shirt, then carried her to his bed.
Her bed was soaked with sweat and he would need to wash the sheets.
After tucking her in, he returned to the kitchen to find some medicine.
Usagi opened her eyes slowly as she felt somebody shaking her lightly
and calling her name. Tetsu? She saw a pair of dark blue eyes looking
at her. No... not Tetsu.. Her ears were a little blocked and the sound
of the voice was muted.
"Mamoru san?" she whispered hoarsely.
A hand helped her sit up a little, tilting her head up. She felt a
plastic cup held to her lips and thick liquid being poured into
her mouth. She swallowed it, feeling it running down inside her.
Usagi closed her eyes. She felt too tired to keep them open. A cold
finger wiped some of the liquid away from her lips. She shivered.
A wet towel was put on her forehead and it sent shivers down her
spine. Her face felt as if it was burning and so did the rest of
her body. She was hot, but also cold at the same time. Mamoru tucked
her into the bed and watched her. He left her after a while, so he
could set up the couch to sleep on.
Mamoru walked quietly into the room to get his pyjamas. He heard
Usagi murmuring something and he walked closer to her. She was talking
in her sleep, groaning and flailing about.
"Tetsu? Tetsu! Don't go..."
He sat down on the bed next to her and gently stroked her hair. The
towel was now warm, so he removed it. Usagi's eyes fluttered. He could
barely see her in the darkness. She opened them a little, but then
closed them again.
"Tetsu? Is that you?" she whispered hopefully.
Mamoru opened his mouth to say "no", but a part of him made him say "yes".
Usagi started to breath slower and deeper. She smiled a little.
"What are you doing back?"
"I forgot to take something," Mamoru replied, feeling stupid.
She giggled. "You're always in a rush, that's why Tetsu. Go slow. Relax."
Mamoru felt her frail fingers lock into his. She squeezed his hand tight.
"You're cold?" she asked.
"No, not really."
She placed his hand onto her cheek. His icy cold hand made her flinch a
little. Mamoru wondered how he was going to get out of being 'Tetsu'.
"Do you want to go to sleep?" he asked, hoping she would say yes.
She shook her head. "Not yet. Not now that you're here."
"I don't want to disturb you..."
"Do you have to go now?"
She sounded disappointed, her hand gripping his.
"Not if you don't want me to."
"You can go if you have to. I'll be okay."
But Usagi started to cry. Mamoru sighed. He hadn't wanted to make her cry.
Her hot tears ran down his hand.
"Don't cry..."
"Please don't leave me Tetsu. I love you so much... Don't you love me?"
Mamoru tried to think fast, but he had no idea what he should say besides
what he knew she wanted to hear.
"Of course I love you," he told her.
She relaxed a little and snuggled her face into his hand. Mamoru felt strange.
The words slipped out so naturally, it surprised him. He had never ever said
those words to anybody in his whole entire life. Mamoru wiped the tears away
from her face, then remembered what had happened the last time he had been
too close to her.
"Good night," he whispered, then got up and left the room quickly.
----
END OF PART 3
----
A.N. The name of this part (if you're an Eva fan you'd recognise it) came
from one of my favourite lines from Evangelion. It's when Fuytsuki says
ignorance can be a source of happiness, after hearing Yui saying that Gendou
is a "cute man, just that nobody knows it". This is basically what Usagi's
feelings are to Tetsu and it kinda sums it all up. But hey, stupid me just
realised that if you haven't watched Evangelion, I just a) spoilt it for
you and b) made a completely useless title cos you won't know what I really
mean -_-; Crud.
Teaser:
Part 4 - There's Always More Than One Way
Usagi looked at him nervously. She looked like she
was going to cry. Mamoru sighed. Why did she always
look like she was going to cry? It made him feel
guilty as if he had done something to make her look
like that.
"I have to get to work," he told her, then started
to walk out of the door.
"Wait!" Usagi called him back, running over to him
and grabbing his arm.
Mamoru turned and looked at her, puzzled. She started
sobbing quietly. Her thin fingers clutched his arm
tighter and tighter.
writing a fanfic if I did? Heh -_-;
In case you forgot or skipped part 2:
"For Chiba Mamoru, with love," Usagi read
quietly, her heart nervously beating. "May
your dreams be sweet, filled with beautiful
and fascinating places to satisfy your curious
mind."
Usagi wondered if she was reading something
personal of Mamoru's and whether it was right
for her to keep on reading. Her fingers
trembled as they refused her will to close the
book.
----
And To Change, Is It Good?
By Artemis
----
Part 3 - Ignorance Can Be A Source Of Happiness
Usagi sat on the grey carpet, still gazing at the door.
She wasn't sure if she had upset Mamoru and she felt
incredibly frustrated. He had looked at her with such
blank eyes, probably disgusted at her for invading his
privacy. The book, surely, was something personal to him.
She sighed deeply, her breath trembling. She slowly got
up and walked to her room. As Usagi approached the door,
she saw a note stuck to it.
"Some mocha ice cream if you get a little hungry.." she
read. "In the freezer by the way."
She tore the note off the door and felt incredibly guilty.
Mamoru had kindly agreed to let her stay while Tetsu was
away and here she was, taking advantage of him and his
position to be kind to her. Of course Mamoru wouldn't
have said anything about the book, because she was Tetsu's
wife and his job was on the line if he had mistreated her
in any way. She sighed as she pushed the door gently.
Usagi flopped onto her bed, feeling her wet hair on her
cheek. She had been so self centered and only thinking
about herself in her poor situation, that she hadn't
thought about him. Usagi promised herself to tell him
the truth when he came home. She felt bad lying to
somebody who was being so nice to her. Usagi rolled
over and glanced at her clock, which read 8:00. Next to
her clock was a photo frame with a photo of her and Tetsu.
She reached out and grabbed the photo frame, hugging it
tight. She closed her eyes, letting her mind fill with
thoughts about Tetsu. Would he write to her? Tell her
what he was doing and where he was? She doubted it, which
made her feel so sad. Usagi loved him, but she didn't
like feeling this doubt. Tetsu had changed and she would
have to change to either suit him, or.... not.
Mamoru sat in his car, waiting impatiently in peak hour
traffic. He tapped his fingers irritably on the wheel.
Suddenly, his phone rang. He picked it up just as the
traffic started to move.
"Tetsu!?" Mamoru shouted in surprise. "How are you?
Usagi? She's doing okay I think. Why? Where are you?"
A car swerved in front of Mamoru, irritating him even
more. The traffic stopped once more. He listened to
Tetsu tell him a few things to remember to settle
at work and not to forget to look after some projects
while he was gone. Mamoru didn't really pay attention
as he scowled at the license plate in front of him.
"Oh by the way Tetsu, why didn't you ring my house?
Usagi would have been there to get it," Mamoru queried.
"I don't particularly want to talk to her right now,
I'm a bit busy."
"But she said it was your three year anniversary
yesterday.... Didn't you do or say anything?"
"Mamoru this is none of your business. I don't have
time for this. I'll talk to you later."
Mamoru was left to hear the dial tone beeping in his
ear. He frowned at the phone, then slipped it back
in the glovebox. The traffic started to move once
more and he almost smashed into the car in front of
him out of frustration.
Usagi yawned and felt her head feeling heavy and her
eyes feeling a stabbing pain from the back of her head.
Her chest felt tight and she couldn't breathe very well.
She felt a burning sensation all over her body. Usagi
managed to sit up and that was when she felt her back
was wet and cold from her hair. She groaned and coughed.
She had slept with wet hair and now she had a fever of
some sort. Usagi managed to stand up, still feeling dizzy
and put the photo frame on the bedside table. She dragged
on a large jumper, then crawled into the bed. Usagi had
no more energy left to look at the clock so she hoped
Mamoru would come home soon. She felt so sick and groggy
that she thought she would die if she didn't take any
medicine soon. As Usagi lay there, her breaths short
and gasping, she wondered why she was staying with Mamoru.
Tetsu had mentioned him many more times than any other
colleague, but she didn't know him at all and he didn't
know her either. She had met him once before at some
dinner and he was a little cool and silent. That was
when Tetsu had been kinder to her. Usagi pulled the
covers over her head and breathed in the stale air.
When Mamoru returned from work, he found the apartment
was cold, dark and quiet. He wondered where Usagi was
and after dumping his things on the dining table, he
checked out the food he left for her in the microwave.
It had been untouched. He frowned, puzzled. Mamoru walked
over to Usagi's room. The door was closed and he could
hear nothing inside.
"U.. Usagi.... san?" he asked. "Are you here?"
Silence. He knocked on the door, then waited. Still silence.
He opened the door slowly and quietly. It was dark in her
room because the curtains had not been drawn open and only
the light from the hallway helped Mamoru to see what was
inside. He saw a small lump on the bed and raised an eyebrow.
Mamoru walked quietly over to the lump on the bed and placed
his hand carefully on it. The lump was warm. He figured it
was Usagi. Was she asleep? He gently moved the covers away
from her head, then saw that she was sweating and her breathing
was in short intervals. Straight away, Mamoru felt her forehead.
She had an incredible fever.
"Usagi san? Usagi san?" he murmured to her, trying to wake her up.
She didn't move at all.
"Can you hear me?" he whispered. "Usagi san?"
Mamoru waited for a while for a response. Usagi didn't respond in
any way. He pulled the covers off her and saw her small huddled
body. In her arms was a photo of her and Tetsu. He felt a stinging
pain in his chest. He ignored the pain and rolled Usagi over onto
her back and made sure she was lying straight and flat. She wore
her bathrobe and a jumper on top, both of which were soaked either
with water or sweat. Mamoru swore under his breath and glanced at
Usagi's sleeping face. He managed to take off her jumper, heavy
and soaked. Her face was red and the bare skin he could see was
patchy.
"It's too dark to see anything.... it doesn't matter.." he convinced
himself as his hand nervously reached over to untie the bath robe.
He tried his hardest not to look at her as he undressed her. Mamoru
dashed to his room, grabbed one of his shirts, then dashed back.
He carefully dressed her in his shirt, then carried her to his bed.
Her bed was soaked with sweat and he would need to wash the sheets.
After tucking her in, he returned to the kitchen to find some medicine.
Usagi opened her eyes slowly as she felt somebody shaking her lightly
and calling her name. Tetsu? She saw a pair of dark blue eyes looking
at her. No... not Tetsu.. Her ears were a little blocked and the sound
of the voice was muted.
"Mamoru san?" she whispered hoarsely.
A hand helped her sit up a little, tilting her head up. She felt a
plastic cup held to her lips and thick liquid being poured into
her mouth. She swallowed it, feeling it running down inside her.
Usagi closed her eyes. She felt too tired to keep them open. A cold
finger wiped some of the liquid away from her lips. She shivered.
A wet towel was put on her forehead and it sent shivers down her
spine. Her face felt as if it was burning and so did the rest of
her body. She was hot, but also cold at the same time. Mamoru tucked
her into the bed and watched her. He left her after a while, so he
could set up the couch to sleep on.
Mamoru walked quietly into the room to get his pyjamas. He heard
Usagi murmuring something and he walked closer to her. She was talking
in her sleep, groaning and flailing about.
"Tetsu? Tetsu! Don't go..."
He sat down on the bed next to her and gently stroked her hair. The
towel was now warm, so he removed it. Usagi's eyes fluttered. He could
barely see her in the darkness. She opened them a little, but then
closed them again.
"Tetsu? Is that you?" she whispered hopefully.
Mamoru opened his mouth to say "no", but a part of him made him say "yes".
Usagi started to breath slower and deeper. She smiled a little.
"What are you doing back?"
"I forgot to take something," Mamoru replied, feeling stupid.
She giggled. "You're always in a rush, that's why Tetsu. Go slow. Relax."
Mamoru felt her frail fingers lock into his. She squeezed his hand tight.
"You're cold?" she asked.
"No, not really."
She placed his hand onto her cheek. His icy cold hand made her flinch a
little. Mamoru wondered how he was going to get out of being 'Tetsu'.
"Do you want to go to sleep?" he asked, hoping she would say yes.
She shook her head. "Not yet. Not now that you're here."
"I don't want to disturb you..."
"Do you have to go now?"
She sounded disappointed, her hand gripping his.
"Not if you don't want me to."
"You can go if you have to. I'll be okay."
But Usagi started to cry. Mamoru sighed. He hadn't wanted to make her cry.
Her hot tears ran down his hand.
"Don't cry..."
"Please don't leave me Tetsu. I love you so much... Don't you love me?"
Mamoru tried to think fast, but he had no idea what he should say besides
what he knew she wanted to hear.
"Of course I love you," he told her.
She relaxed a little and snuggled her face into his hand. Mamoru felt strange.
The words slipped out so naturally, it surprised him. He had never ever said
those words to anybody in his whole entire life. Mamoru wiped the tears away
from her face, then remembered what had happened the last time he had been
too close to her.
"Good night," he whispered, then got up and left the room quickly.
----
END OF PART 3
----
A.N. The name of this part (if you're an Eva fan you'd recognise it) came
from one of my favourite lines from Evangelion. It's when Fuytsuki says
ignorance can be a source of happiness, after hearing Yui saying that Gendou
is a "cute man, just that nobody knows it". This is basically what Usagi's
feelings are to Tetsu and it kinda sums it all up. But hey, stupid me just
realised that if you haven't watched Evangelion, I just a) spoilt it for
you and b) made a completely useless title cos you won't know what I really
mean -_-; Crud.
Teaser:
Part 4 - There's Always More Than One Way
Usagi looked at him nervously. She looked like she
was going to cry. Mamoru sighed. Why did she always
look like she was going to cry? It made him feel
guilty as if he had done something to make her look
like that.
"I have to get to work," he told her, then started
to walk out of the door.
"Wait!" Usagi called him back, running over to him
and grabbing his arm.
Mamoru turned and looked at her, puzzled. She started
sobbing quietly. Her thin fingers clutched his arm
tighter and tighter.
