Setting: Set shortly after Barney sees Hannibal and Clarise at the opera.
Disclaimer: I don't own these characters (who, I must add, are incredibly well written :p) nor do I own anything else aside from the basic concept of this little story. Please don't sue me, I'm 15 and broke. :P
The Song, "Don't Cry For Me Argentine" is composed by Andrew Lloyd Webber, Lyrics by Tim Rice, and sung by Madonna in this instance. Please, please, don't sue me for that either!
Ardelia shuffled into her apartment, turning on various lights as she walked towards her kitchen, all the while thinking of curling up on the sofa to watch some good old black and white movies that were undoubtedly going to be on TV that night. Only when she stopped at the refrigerator for a coke did she notice something strange about the house.
Immediately, she put her hand on her gun, and quietly walked back out towards the living room, where her unusually hyperactive senses told her the 'intruder' was. She stopped dead in her tracks, and looked at the manila package with a sense of both dread, and hilarity. So this is what had piqued her senses, eh? An envelope, for goodness sakes!
"Well, can't be that bad, can it? It's just a envelope." She retrieved her evidence handling gloves from her briefcase, and sat down on the couch to open the envelop, which had no markings whatsoever, aside from a neat, handwritten label with her name written clearly and elegantly on the front side of it.
She picked up a ball point pen from the coffee table, and opened the envelop carefully, so as not to damage any of the contents. When she peeked into the envelope, she was greeted by a few things that clearly astonished her. She turned it upside down, and let the objects clatter onto her table.
She looked at the objects for a moment, before noticing a smaller, more expensive looking business envelop with her name again written in the elegant script she was becoming more and more familiar with.
Ardelia opened the letter, and began to read it slowly.
Dear Delia.
It's amazing what time can do to a friendship, is it not? Have you forgotten me already, or perhaps you've just blocked out memories of me from your undoubtedly busy life.
In case you have, it's me, Ardelia. Clarice-or should I say, the person formerly known as Clarice Starling. Though it has a decisive rock-star ring to it, does it ring any bells yet, Agent Mapp? It should.
Now that the re-introductions are over, perhaps I should get to the point of my little letter.
You may find this hard to believe, indeed, I did too. But let us not say that I am an unsentimental bitch, for if you ask my dear Hannibal, he will tell you quite the opposite. But, back to the point.
It has been what, 3 and a half years since I last saw you, correct? And you have been getting along well, I see. (No, don't bother to ask, I'm sure you can figure it out without my help) But I have noticed your tendency to talk to yourself about what happened to me quite frequently. I'm going to relieve you of guilt, Delia. (And hopefully, put a chapter of my life behind me in doing so.)
So now, I would like for you to pop in the video tape into your VCR (assuming you still have one, and haven't gone DVD on me) and watch as I talk to you.
And I needn't say this: please don't even think of turning this in: We'll be long gone before the Fumbling Bumbling Idiots ever get this recording.
Ardelia sat stunned for a moment. What in the world was going on? Starling, writing to her? She shook her head, and quite by automation, put the videocassette into the VCR, pressing play before plopping back down into her seat.
The screen turned black then showed a magnificent view of a river, in city that could not be described or identified by Mapp at the present time. The image panned around to a large villa, focusing on a face vaguely familiar to Ardelia. Almost immediately, when the face smiled, she knew exactly who it was. It was Starling.
Ardelia suppressed a gasp and inched forward on her seat on the couch.
'Clarice' smiled still at the camera and waved slightly. She opened her mouth to speak, but Ardelia paused the tape momentarily to collect herself. When she resumed the tape, and 'Clarice' began to talk, hardly anything about her dialect was familiar; except for the slight southern twang that even time out of the country could disguise, or rid.
"Hello Ardelia! I trust you are in good health. Well, I'd like to be there to hug you, but as you can see, I am quite out of reach at the moment." she flashed the toothy grin that had once been Ardelia's favorite, and consequently the one she saw the least.
"I think I'd like to give you a tour of my humble abode, if you wouldn't mind. I'm sure you wont, as it is quite stunning.So I'll start here. This is the terrace overlooking the river- Ah there I go. Hannibal's always told me I can be quite too free with information. Well, let's leave it at "Overlooking a river" eh? You'll see the Patio set, and a nice stack of firewood, which I was not allowed to chop, you'll be happy to know. Well, perhaps you wont, as you don't know exactly why I haven't been allowed to chop it...but anyway, on to the Kitchen.
"You'll see how well stocked it is, and well kept. And you'll undoubtedly be surprised to hear that I actually do cook here" she laughed softly on the tape, almost mimicking the chuckles Mapp let out on her sofa.
"I cook quite a lot now, much to my own pleasure. I'm afraid I don't use the many variants of liquor that Hannibal is used to using, in fact, he has quite forbidden me to drink any alcohol whatsoever, much to my chagrin, as you can imagine. Well, a kitchen is a kitchen, as you'll notice. And no, there is no..house specialty meat in the freezer." Clarice giggled lightly and shook her head.
"The living room, as you can see, is fairly nondescript, as is the Den. The study is obviously well stocked, and well used, with Hannibal's harpsichord residing in there. He loves that thing, I tell 'ya! Now-" a door is heard closing in the background, and Clarice's face lights up.
"Well, the Master of the House is home. Would you like to meet him? I'm quite sure you know of him by now, but let us just say he is nothing like what you have heard." Clarice smiles at the camera. She is seen looking off camera as she sets the recorder down on the table facing one of the many fireplaces. Vague noises are heard as she greets whoever had just entered the Den in hushed tones. Another moment passes, and Clarice walks back into view.
"Ardelia Mapp, allow me to introduce my husband-" Ardelia didn't hold back her gasp this time. "Doctor Hannibal Lecter." The view pans around to view a man in a gray suit, red vest, and black tie on a white shirt. He smiles in what anyone other than Clarice would term as maniacal expression.
"Good evening, Agent Mapp. " He nods courteously and turns to Clarice, a slight question in his eyes, though he probably already knows the answer, Ardelia muses.
"I'm reassuring her, and cutting all loose ends. Like you suggested, Love," Clarice said moving onscreen momentarily to peck Lecter on the lips. Ardelia shook her head and continued watching, a slight smile playing on her lips.
"Ah. Well then, allow me to excuse myself while you finish." He said smiling again at the Camera.
"Of course, Hannibal. Dinner will be ready in about, half an hour."
"No, no. Allow me too cook. You need to rest, my dear. We can't have you overexerting yourself, can we?" he said winking at her.
"Yes yes, of course." The door closed again, and she looked at the camera. "Quite the mother hen, isn't he?" she shook her head and started walking towards the other door to the Den.
"Allow me to skip ahead to the room that will undoubtedly make your jaw drop." She grinned evilly into the lens, and waked up an elegant stairwell. Upon reaching the landing, she panned the camera to show the entire domed skylight. When the camera again showed the 'front' as Starling- or Mrs. Lecter, Ardelia mused- walked, she saw a hand reaching for a doorknob, and turning it. The door opened, and Ardelia's heart almost stopped the instance she saw what was inside- a nursery.
The screen moved around the room, showing every centimeter of it before finally resting on Clarice again.
"Shocked? Mortified? Nauseated?" she laughed in a mild imitation of Dr. Lecter's laugh, and shook her head.
"Well, let us just say, that I was nothing minus elated once I found out. Hannibal was quite nervous.which was very much out of character for him, but having twins can do that to someone. They're due in 8 months time. Hannibal will deliver them, of course" she smiled widely and sat down on the rocking chair.
The camera cut off, then picked up back in the Den with Lecter- or rather Both Lecters sitting on the couch hand in hand facing the camera, which was supposedly on a tripod.
"As you can see, Ardelia, I am quite well looked after-"
"Tsk tsk, you make it sound as if you're a pet, Clarice." Hannibal said winking. Clarice pecked him on the lips and turned back to the camera, giving his hand a bit of a squeeze.
"I am well, here. Nothing is going on that would alarm you, unless you consider true love alarming." she laughed softly at her own joke, Hannibal shaking his head and grinning lightly as she did so.
"If I may, my dear..." Hannibal said looking at Clarice momentarily. At her nod, he turned back to the camera and semi-glared it with his intense eyes for a moment.
"Without a doubt you are currently asking yourself some questions. Let me dissipate some of your inquisitiveness, Agent Mapp- Ardelia. I have not drugged Clarice. Indeed, I did at the beginning, as you will understand it was quite the necessity, but drugs have no part in our life.
"I have not brainwashed, hypnotized, or otherwise impaired her judgment in anyway so as to keep her under my beck and call. I have not harmed another being since Mr. Krendler (the fate of which I am certain you have already heard) nor have I harmed Clarice at all."
"Quite the opposite, really, Love." Clarice said, nodding seriously. Doctor Lecter, seeming to not mind her momentary rudeness continued.
"Nor will I ever. The same goes for our children, who will be joining the world in 8 months time. I would like to ask of you the same courtesy, Agent Mapp. I need not remind you what double crossing me will lead to, but should you harm Clarice in any way, even She would not be able to hold me back." Ardelia gulped momentarily as the couple kissed gently.
"Well put, Hannibal, very well put. Delia, I expect this will be the last time I shall speak to you in the near future- I wont promise to never again speak with you, because I do believe you to be a dear friend, even if it was some time ago. I will, however, promise to you that I will never risk your job, your life, or anything else you hold sacred in future contact. You mean too much to me for me to thoughtlessly aim to hurt you." Clarice sniffled and blinked.
"Good bye, Ardelia. Be safe!" a teary eyed Clarice wiped her face with a handkerchief as Hannibal turned off the camcorder, leaving Ardelia staring at the TV screen.
She looked down onto the coffee table and noticed a CD case with a note attached. She picked it up and read in what now appeared to be Clarice's handwriting:
Delia,
Pop this in to your CD deck and listen carefully to the words. I heard it some time ago, and again recently. It brought up some thoughts about you and me. Just listen to the words, and you'll understand.
Love,
Clarice Lecter
Ardelia did as she was told, and put the CD on. The strains of "Don't Cry For Me Argentina" filled the room.
It won't be easy, you'll think it strange
When I try to explain how I feel
That I still need your love after all that I've done
You won't believe me
All you will see is a girl you once knew
Although she's dressed up to the nines
At sixes and sevens with you
I had to let it happen, I had to change
Couldn't stay all my life down at heel
Looking out of the window, staying out of the sun
So I chose freedom
Running around, trying everything new
But nothing impressed me at all
I never expected it to
Chorus:
Don't cry for me Argentina
The truth is I never left you
All through my wild days
My mad existence
I kept my promise
Don't keep your distance
And as for fortune, and as for fame
I never invited them in
Though it seemed to the world they were all I desired
They are illusions
They are not the solutions they promised to be
The answer was here all the time
I love you and hope you love me
Don't cry for me Argentina
(chorus)
Have I said too much?
There's nothing more I can think of to say to you.
But all you have to do is look at me to know
That every word is true
Ardelia wiped her face with a tissue and pressed repeat on the CD. Yes, it does sum up you, Clare. She thought as she rewound the tape to play again, the CD playing in the background.
Disclaimer: I don't own these characters (who, I must add, are incredibly well written :p) nor do I own anything else aside from the basic concept of this little story. Please don't sue me, I'm 15 and broke. :P
The Song, "Don't Cry For Me Argentine" is composed by Andrew Lloyd Webber, Lyrics by Tim Rice, and sung by Madonna in this instance. Please, please, don't sue me for that either!
Ardelia shuffled into her apartment, turning on various lights as she walked towards her kitchen, all the while thinking of curling up on the sofa to watch some good old black and white movies that were undoubtedly going to be on TV that night. Only when she stopped at the refrigerator for a coke did she notice something strange about the house.
Immediately, she put her hand on her gun, and quietly walked back out towards the living room, where her unusually hyperactive senses told her the 'intruder' was. She stopped dead in her tracks, and looked at the manila package with a sense of both dread, and hilarity. So this is what had piqued her senses, eh? An envelope, for goodness sakes!
"Well, can't be that bad, can it? It's just a envelope." She retrieved her evidence handling gloves from her briefcase, and sat down on the couch to open the envelop, which had no markings whatsoever, aside from a neat, handwritten label with her name written clearly and elegantly on the front side of it.
She picked up a ball point pen from the coffee table, and opened the envelop carefully, so as not to damage any of the contents. When she peeked into the envelope, she was greeted by a few things that clearly astonished her. She turned it upside down, and let the objects clatter onto her table.
She looked at the objects for a moment, before noticing a smaller, more expensive looking business envelop with her name again written in the elegant script she was becoming more and more familiar with.
Ardelia opened the letter, and began to read it slowly.
Dear Delia.
It's amazing what time can do to a friendship, is it not? Have you forgotten me already, or perhaps you've just blocked out memories of me from your undoubtedly busy life.
In case you have, it's me, Ardelia. Clarice-or should I say, the person formerly known as Clarice Starling. Though it has a decisive rock-star ring to it, does it ring any bells yet, Agent Mapp? It should.
Now that the re-introductions are over, perhaps I should get to the point of my little letter.
You may find this hard to believe, indeed, I did too. But let us not say that I am an unsentimental bitch, for if you ask my dear Hannibal, he will tell you quite the opposite. But, back to the point.
It has been what, 3 and a half years since I last saw you, correct? And you have been getting along well, I see. (No, don't bother to ask, I'm sure you can figure it out without my help) But I have noticed your tendency to talk to yourself about what happened to me quite frequently. I'm going to relieve you of guilt, Delia. (And hopefully, put a chapter of my life behind me in doing so.)
So now, I would like for you to pop in the video tape into your VCR (assuming you still have one, and haven't gone DVD on me) and watch as I talk to you.
And I needn't say this: please don't even think of turning this in: We'll be long gone before the Fumbling Bumbling Idiots ever get this recording.
Ardelia sat stunned for a moment. What in the world was going on? Starling, writing to her? She shook her head, and quite by automation, put the videocassette into the VCR, pressing play before plopping back down into her seat.
The screen turned black then showed a magnificent view of a river, in city that could not be described or identified by Mapp at the present time. The image panned around to a large villa, focusing on a face vaguely familiar to Ardelia. Almost immediately, when the face smiled, she knew exactly who it was. It was Starling.
Ardelia suppressed a gasp and inched forward on her seat on the couch.
'Clarice' smiled still at the camera and waved slightly. She opened her mouth to speak, but Ardelia paused the tape momentarily to collect herself. When she resumed the tape, and 'Clarice' began to talk, hardly anything about her dialect was familiar; except for the slight southern twang that even time out of the country could disguise, or rid.
"Hello Ardelia! I trust you are in good health. Well, I'd like to be there to hug you, but as you can see, I am quite out of reach at the moment." she flashed the toothy grin that had once been Ardelia's favorite, and consequently the one she saw the least.
"I think I'd like to give you a tour of my humble abode, if you wouldn't mind. I'm sure you wont, as it is quite stunning.So I'll start here. This is the terrace overlooking the river- Ah there I go. Hannibal's always told me I can be quite too free with information. Well, let's leave it at "Overlooking a river" eh? You'll see the Patio set, and a nice stack of firewood, which I was not allowed to chop, you'll be happy to know. Well, perhaps you wont, as you don't know exactly why I haven't been allowed to chop it...but anyway, on to the Kitchen.
"You'll see how well stocked it is, and well kept. And you'll undoubtedly be surprised to hear that I actually do cook here" she laughed softly on the tape, almost mimicking the chuckles Mapp let out on her sofa.
"I cook quite a lot now, much to my own pleasure. I'm afraid I don't use the many variants of liquor that Hannibal is used to using, in fact, he has quite forbidden me to drink any alcohol whatsoever, much to my chagrin, as you can imagine. Well, a kitchen is a kitchen, as you'll notice. And no, there is no..house specialty meat in the freezer." Clarice giggled lightly and shook her head.
"The living room, as you can see, is fairly nondescript, as is the Den. The study is obviously well stocked, and well used, with Hannibal's harpsichord residing in there. He loves that thing, I tell 'ya! Now-" a door is heard closing in the background, and Clarice's face lights up.
"Well, the Master of the House is home. Would you like to meet him? I'm quite sure you know of him by now, but let us just say he is nothing like what you have heard." Clarice smiles at the camera. She is seen looking off camera as she sets the recorder down on the table facing one of the many fireplaces. Vague noises are heard as she greets whoever had just entered the Den in hushed tones. Another moment passes, and Clarice walks back into view.
"Ardelia Mapp, allow me to introduce my husband-" Ardelia didn't hold back her gasp this time. "Doctor Hannibal Lecter." The view pans around to view a man in a gray suit, red vest, and black tie on a white shirt. He smiles in what anyone other than Clarice would term as maniacal expression.
"Good evening, Agent Mapp. " He nods courteously and turns to Clarice, a slight question in his eyes, though he probably already knows the answer, Ardelia muses.
"I'm reassuring her, and cutting all loose ends. Like you suggested, Love," Clarice said moving onscreen momentarily to peck Lecter on the lips. Ardelia shook her head and continued watching, a slight smile playing on her lips.
"Ah. Well then, allow me to excuse myself while you finish." He said smiling again at the Camera.
"Of course, Hannibal. Dinner will be ready in about, half an hour."
"No, no. Allow me too cook. You need to rest, my dear. We can't have you overexerting yourself, can we?" he said winking at her.
"Yes yes, of course." The door closed again, and she looked at the camera. "Quite the mother hen, isn't he?" she shook her head and started walking towards the other door to the Den.
"Allow me to skip ahead to the room that will undoubtedly make your jaw drop." She grinned evilly into the lens, and waked up an elegant stairwell. Upon reaching the landing, she panned the camera to show the entire domed skylight. When the camera again showed the 'front' as Starling- or Mrs. Lecter, Ardelia mused- walked, she saw a hand reaching for a doorknob, and turning it. The door opened, and Ardelia's heart almost stopped the instance she saw what was inside- a nursery.
The screen moved around the room, showing every centimeter of it before finally resting on Clarice again.
"Shocked? Mortified? Nauseated?" she laughed in a mild imitation of Dr. Lecter's laugh, and shook her head.
"Well, let us just say, that I was nothing minus elated once I found out. Hannibal was quite nervous.which was very much out of character for him, but having twins can do that to someone. They're due in 8 months time. Hannibal will deliver them, of course" she smiled widely and sat down on the rocking chair.
The camera cut off, then picked up back in the Den with Lecter- or rather Both Lecters sitting on the couch hand in hand facing the camera, which was supposedly on a tripod.
"As you can see, Ardelia, I am quite well looked after-"
"Tsk tsk, you make it sound as if you're a pet, Clarice." Hannibal said winking. Clarice pecked him on the lips and turned back to the camera, giving his hand a bit of a squeeze.
"I am well, here. Nothing is going on that would alarm you, unless you consider true love alarming." she laughed softly at her own joke, Hannibal shaking his head and grinning lightly as she did so.
"If I may, my dear..." Hannibal said looking at Clarice momentarily. At her nod, he turned back to the camera and semi-glared it with his intense eyes for a moment.
"Without a doubt you are currently asking yourself some questions. Let me dissipate some of your inquisitiveness, Agent Mapp- Ardelia. I have not drugged Clarice. Indeed, I did at the beginning, as you will understand it was quite the necessity, but drugs have no part in our life.
"I have not brainwashed, hypnotized, or otherwise impaired her judgment in anyway so as to keep her under my beck and call. I have not harmed another being since Mr. Krendler (the fate of which I am certain you have already heard) nor have I harmed Clarice at all."
"Quite the opposite, really, Love." Clarice said, nodding seriously. Doctor Lecter, seeming to not mind her momentary rudeness continued.
"Nor will I ever. The same goes for our children, who will be joining the world in 8 months time. I would like to ask of you the same courtesy, Agent Mapp. I need not remind you what double crossing me will lead to, but should you harm Clarice in any way, even She would not be able to hold me back." Ardelia gulped momentarily as the couple kissed gently.
"Well put, Hannibal, very well put. Delia, I expect this will be the last time I shall speak to you in the near future- I wont promise to never again speak with you, because I do believe you to be a dear friend, even if it was some time ago. I will, however, promise to you that I will never risk your job, your life, or anything else you hold sacred in future contact. You mean too much to me for me to thoughtlessly aim to hurt you." Clarice sniffled and blinked.
"Good bye, Ardelia. Be safe!" a teary eyed Clarice wiped her face with a handkerchief as Hannibal turned off the camcorder, leaving Ardelia staring at the TV screen.
She looked down onto the coffee table and noticed a CD case with a note attached. She picked it up and read in what now appeared to be Clarice's handwriting:
Delia,
Pop this in to your CD deck and listen carefully to the words. I heard it some time ago, and again recently. It brought up some thoughts about you and me. Just listen to the words, and you'll understand.
Love,
Clarice Lecter
Ardelia did as she was told, and put the CD on. The strains of "Don't Cry For Me Argentina" filled the room.
It won't be easy, you'll think it strange
When I try to explain how I feel
That I still need your love after all that I've done
You won't believe me
All you will see is a girl you once knew
Although she's dressed up to the nines
At sixes and sevens with you
I had to let it happen, I had to change
Couldn't stay all my life down at heel
Looking out of the window, staying out of the sun
So I chose freedom
Running around, trying everything new
But nothing impressed me at all
I never expected it to
Chorus:
Don't cry for me Argentina
The truth is I never left you
All through my wild days
My mad existence
I kept my promise
Don't keep your distance
And as for fortune, and as for fame
I never invited them in
Though it seemed to the world they were all I desired
They are illusions
They are not the solutions they promised to be
The answer was here all the time
I love you and hope you love me
Don't cry for me Argentina
(chorus)
Have I said too much?
There's nothing more I can think of to say to you.
But all you have to do is look at me to know
That every word is true
Ardelia wiped her face with a tissue and pressed repeat on the CD. Yes, it does sum up you, Clare. She thought as she rewound the tape to play again, the CD playing in the background.
