1-9. Revelation
As Vincent rested, recovering from the last lingering effects of his wounds and the fatigue of calling upon the materia, Lucrecia dug into their three packs--her own, Vincent's, and the guide's--and found enough spare clothes to keep Vincent warm. She then emptied the guide's pack and distributed its contents among her pack and Vincent's. The task cleared her head and aided her new sense of purpose. She took a long drink of water from her canteen, then refilled it from the guide's. Vincent had finished putting on the extra clothes by now. She offered him a drink of water, and he took it, drinking deeply. Lucrecia refilled her canteen again, nearly emptying the guide's canteen. She left it with the pack, stashed behind a boulder at the side of the path. They could get it on their way back. She had absolutely no doubt about that now.
When both of them were suited up and stocked up, Lucrecia led the way up the path. "Lucrecia?" Vincent asked, as the cliff dropped out of sight behind them.
"Yes?"
"We don't know where the right path is."
"We'll find it," she said. "You know we will."
Vincent smiled. "You're dead set on it, aren't you."
"Absolutely."
The sun climbed high as they hiked; it had become a bright, chilly early-winter day. The path was steeper at this point, forcing them to slow their climb. When they reached the next ledge, where the path met a step-like series of low, shingled rocks at a right angle, they stopped for a break. It had been an hour since they'd left the cliff, and the Reactor was invisible from here. They sat down on the rocks and took their packs off, soaking in the sunlight. Vincent lay back on his elbows, with his feet stretched in front of him. Lucrecia unbuckled the tightly rolled emergency blanket from the bottom of her pack and spread it out on the rock between them. She opened her pack and found some of the food they'd brought, setting it out on the blanket.
"And you managed to find a picnic lunch," Vincent said. "You will never fail to surprise me."
"I'll take that as a compliment," she replied, having regained a little of her high spirits with the return of the quest. "Here, take as much as you want. You probably need this more than me." Remembering the reason for this, she fell quiet again, nervously rearranging the supplies on the blanket.
"You seemed afraid of me," Vincent mused.
"When?"
"Just after...the dragon. You seemed afraid of me. I thought you understood what I'm trained to do." His voice was calm, but he could not disguise a hint of hurt and disappointment in it.
"I...I did. I do. I do understand," she insisted. "It's just that...I panicked, first of all, and I'm not proud of that to begin with. But I'd never seen it before. I'd never seen you like that."
"In killing mode," he said darkly. "I know what you're talking about."
"Yes. That. Seeing that rattled me, especially in those circumstances, when I didn't know which way was up to begin with. Although at the same time I knew you were doing it for our sake, in self-defense and to..." She had trouble admitting it. "To help me, to protect me."
"I was. I was doing it more for your sake than in self-defense... and partly by instinct, I have to admit. Someone I..." Vincent looked up into the sky, and his voice was resigned to the confession. "Someone I cared about was threatened, and the rest was instinct and training."
Lucrecia was silent for a moment, shocked and touched by his words. "You...care about me?"
"More than is reasonable," he admitted softly. "More than I can stand sometimes."
You can't...but I can't reinterpret that, I can't deny that... "I'm doing fine on my own, you know. I don't need your help."
"I know. I'm going to give it to you anyway."
Lucrecia closed her eyes, afraid she might cry again. I don't need it, your help or your caring, but I want it. I don't want to want it. His words echoed in her mind. I care about you more than is reasonable. More than I can stand... why can't I answer him? He wants to hear it, he has to after what he said. What am I afraid of? Am I afraid he won't want to hear that I feel the same way?
Or am I afraid that he will want to hear it?
"Thank you," she managed to say. "I...don't know how to thank you."
Vincent looked over at her, and watched her for what seemed like forever. Lucrecia felt faintly sick with mixed anticipation and fear. What was he thinking?
"You could tell me you care about me," he said finally. "If it's true. That would more than make up for it."
"Of course it's true," she answered immediately, impulsively.
"Don't say 'of course' like it's obvious," he said bitterly. He sat up and picked some things from the picnic blanket, slid them closer to his side. He looked as if he were distracting himself.
"It is obvious...I mean..." She faltered, started again. "I don't know why you say that. I told you I understand about the job. I'm glad you want to help me, though I don't need it and I can't imagine why you'd want to. And I do care about you, Vincent." She took a deep breath. "I've never known anyone like you. And if I'm doing a bad job with this, please understand that I don't really know what to do, and I'm doing my best."
The bitterness in his voice had left. "I'm not entirely sure what I'm doing either. Do you think I go through this on a daily basis? I'm not exactly a ladies' man, you know."
"Well...you are very handsome..." Realizing what she'd said after she said it, she felt her face flushing, but Vincent merely shrugged.
"I'm antisocial. Though I thank you, and I'm glad you think that."
"You're not antisocial. You're just..." She searched for the right word. "You're a little hard to know at first. Introverted, I guess. There's nothing wrong with that."
"I know, but it's not exactly what women are looking for in their perfect man."
"That's a generalization," she argued. "Some of us don't mind." And some of us find it maddeningly attractive. But good luck being able to say that.
Vincent smiled a little. "Thank you. I'm glad to hear that."
They finished their picnic lunch together, looking out over the mountains. Somehow they both knew that at that moment, nothing more needed to be said.
When they were finished, they cleaned up the area, stretched a bit, shouldered their packs, and started up the mountain again. They were close to the top now, though the path was almost too steep and rocky to walk. But Lucrecia was determined to make it, and her enthusiasm had rubbed off on Vincent as well. It was almost inevitable now. They would reach the top of Mount Nibel or die trying. There wasn't much question now about what to do.
For the next three hours, Lucrecia and Vincent struggled up the punishing stretch of rock that propped the peak of Mount Nibel against the sky. Shortly after their lunch break, the path all but vanished and the dirt and rocks under their feet turned to boulders. They took the largest boulders one at a time, hoisting their packs up first, then pulling themselves over the boulders as they'd jumped over the wall to the Shinra Mansion. They took turns going first, the first one up helping the second; Lucrecia wouldn't allow Vincent to take more than his turn, though he tried. It was steady going at first, but their pace slowed to a crawl as the day wore on and the endlessly repeated short climbs started to take their toll.
Finally, they reached a new obstacle: a vertical leap of sheer rock, some ten feet high. Lucrecia looked up past it; above it were more of the same formation of rock, stacked one above the other to the mountain's peak. She hesitated for a moment, for the first time in hours: were they even trained to do this?
Vincent looked up after her, studied the terrain. "We can do this," he said. "We just have to figure out how to do it."
Lucrecia nodded, encouraged a little by his resolve. She slid back a step to see the edge of the wall better. In a minute or two, she had a plan worked out. "We have rope," she began. "I remember taking it from the guide's pack. I think one of us can get to the top--maybe you can lift me up, I'm lighter than you are--and throw a rope down to pull the equipment up, then the other person can climb up using the rope."
Vincent thought this over. "It sounds good, if the first part works."
"Well, nothing to do but try at this point." She shrugged off her pack and dug through it to find the coil of rope. Vincent set his gear on the ground, gazing up at the rock face, then leaned against it, bracing himself with his gloved hands as if he meant to tip over the mountaintop.
"All right," Vincent directed, "climb up on my shoulders and I'll lift you to the edge. I don't think it's much taller than both of us together."
"Right," Lucrecia muttered, looping the coil of rope over her shoulder to get it out of the way. She paused for a moment, planning her climb, then set her hands on his shoulders--stop it right now, nervous means shaky, shaky means weak, weak means fall--and hoisted herself up to stand unsteadily on his shoulders. She felt his muscles tense, balancing under her weight, but they both remained standing. Lucrecia balanced herself against the rock wall as Vincent stood up straight, holding on to her feet. With the added height, she was able to reach the top edge of the rock. "Got it," she gasped, latching onto it with both hands. Please tell me there aren't any dragons at the top, she thought as she strained to pull herself up onto the ledge. Her hold wasn't very secure, but she pulled herself up, first a better handhold, then her elbows, then her knees--Vincent pushed from under her, which made it much easier--and then she was up, kneeling on the ledge. The ledge was small, and another vertical wall awaited them, but there were no dragons. She smiled and waved down to Vincent. He waved back and clapped a few times; Lucrecia, tired but happy that her plan was working, bowed deeply.
Lucrecia then uncoiled the rope and, lacking a better support to tie it to, knotted it around her waist. She sat on the ledge and tossed the free end of the rope back down, bracing her feet against the ground and readying a good hand-hold on the rope as Vincent tied the first knapsack to the free end. Compared to the chin-up onto the ledge, she found it easy to hoist the pack up to the ledge. The second pack, Vincent's, which she'd packed a bit lighter than her own, was even easier. She untied the end of the rope and threw it down a third time. The pull on the rope this time almost dragged her off the ledge; she struggled to her feet for better leverage, leaning back against the direction of the force. She slipped forward alarmingly, but before she came close to the edge Vincent appeared, hoisting himself onto the ledge. He rolled over onto his back on the rocky ground, a little out of breath, looking up at her with that half-smile of his as she untied the rope from her waist.
"All right, now... so far you can... grow alien cells... write scientific papers... jump over walls... identify trees... make picnic lunches from nowhere... and climb mountains. Is there anything you can't do?"
Lucrecia helped him to his feet, blushing furiously. "Well...you helped me with that last part," she said. "You make it sound like so much."
"It is," he insisted. "You just don't see it." He stretched his arms and legs and took his position again at the bottom of the ledge, waiting for her to finish coiling the rope back around her shoulder. "Take me, for example. I...well, I shoot things."
"Oh, come on." She swatted his arm jokingly before clambering up to his shoulders. "You can do a lot more than that."
"In theory," Vincent said as he stood up straight and steadied his stance. "But I haven't proven it yet."
"We'll have to work on that." This ledge was a bit lower than the first, though the first part of the hoist was still difficult. She climbed up onto the top and sat down for a moment as she uncoiled the rope. "All of these pull-ups--I should have paid more attention in school," she said. "To think, I always thought gym class was a waste of time."
"So did I," Vincent replied. "Except for archery. And I wasn't too bad at running, either," he added thoughtfully.
Lucrecia pulled the first pack to the top of the ledge, smiling to herself. She wondered where Vincent had gone to school...some other time, she decided. Vincent had never told her about his past, and she gathered that it was not an accidental oversight. She tossed the end of the rope back down, then hoisted up the second pack. She stood up and found a steady stance before throwing the rope's free end down. This time Vincent's climb was easier; she barely moved from her spot. The old excitement surged through her again: they were actually making it. They were going to conquer this mountain after all.
Vincent watched her, smiling a little. He paused for a moment, standing by her, and for an instant Lucrecia thought he might hug her--but he looked away and braced himself against the next wall. Lucrecia sighed silently, half relief, half disappointment, and got ready for the next climb.
Despite her growing fatigue, the walls seemed easier to scale as they climbed further upward. The walls were literally lower; that was easy enough to explain. But almost as important was the fact that each ledge brought them closer to the peak.
Finally, blessedly, just as Lucrecia's arm muscles were starting to protest sincerely, the ledges stopped. She pulled Vincent up onto the final plateau and they stood together, struck silent. They were standing on a platform of rock, barely wide enough for five people to stand on comfortably. All around them was empty space; above them was the blue yawn of the sky; below them stretched the glorious peaks of the mountain range, the soft green valleys, and in the distance, a sliver of the sea. Vincent turned slowly, taking it all in, amazed by the sight. Lucrecia looked up, into the vast blue reach of the sky. She closed her eyes for a moment. They had made it. After all of that struggling, they had made it, to the peak, to the top of the world. There was no one but them at this moment; despite what they'd been told, they'd done it alone, needing help from no one else--no guides, no maps, no trainers. They had conquered the mountain together.
As Vincent turned back to where he'd begun, they drew together instinctively, for balance amid the breathless thrill of the ascent, and for stability against the dizzying emptiness of space around them. Vincent gazed off into the mountains. Lucrecia watched him with a growing awareness of his presence, the solidity of his body and the force of his soul... She was struck by the totality of this person, this man, who had trusted her with his life, who had saved her life as well--not in return for his own, but because he believed her life to be worth saving. This man believed her to be so able, so fascinating. He had walked with her in the twilight and trusted her with his deepest pain. He cared about her work--cared about her, he had admitted it, in the sunlight on the side of the mountain. But he can't... the familiar protest insisted. It was quickly silenced, Stop it. We just climbed a mountain with no other help! We're standing higher than any other humans in the world. Here...now...there is no "can't."
Suddenly brave, Lucrecia slipped her arms tighter around Vincent, no longer holding on to him merely for balance. She buried her head in his shoulder, impulsively, and squeezed her eyes shut tight, wondering if he could hear her heart pounding through the thick coats. She felt him freeze for a moment, stunned. Then he tightened his hold on her, no longer a hold now but an embrace. They stood that way for a moment, sensing the change between them. And then, suddenly, Lucrecia felt his glove under her chin, lifting her head, and the soft touch of his lips on hers. She almost stumbled back, shaken by the wave of relief that crashed through her. She realized that she had been waiting for this, how long she couldn't tell--but more surprisingly, Vincent had been waiting for it as well. The realization washed through her and was echoed back in his eyes; he knew it too now, knew she had wanted this as much as he had and was even more afraid to admit it. They pressed harder, deeper into the kiss, almost simultaneously, caught up in the breathless granting of an unjustly denied wish. This is real, was Lucrecia's first coherent thought. For once, you aren't dreaming this, this is really happening... She broke away, but did not let him go. She stared at him, stunned, though a secret excitement swelled in her heart.
Lucrecia stopped doubting, at that moment. She was in love with him, with this distant, intelligent, dangerous, sensitive, and beautiful man. And she was sure now that, somehow, he was in love with her as well....
It could not be denied any longer. Lucrecia thought, at that moment, that she would never deny it again.
