Draco and Egbert
The sun shines merrily down on a medieval themed environment as it watches the affairs of heaven and earth. Zoom in to see a rather large tavern with a sign proudly proclaiming "Draco's Lair." The tavern has only the sky as its roof, but that doesn't seem to bother any of the current customers. Cupids and angels flit about waiting on tables. We see Draco tapping his claws on a table as he enjoys the music of an unseen harp. He looks up impatiently, searching the establishment for something.
Egbert: (enters the tavern a bit cautiously and sits down at Draco's table) I've escaped. I'm free. They thought they could keep me in that dreadful place. But I showed them. Yes, I did. Not even Hell can hold me.
Draco: (with an amused smile) Good eve to you, human.
Egbert: (is startled, but recognizes Draco as having been in a movie he saw once.) It's not evening Draco. But I'll overlook it this time because I rather like your brogue.
Draco: (shrugs) What you overlook or not is of no importance to me. But I will tell you why I say eve. (leans over so that his scaly muzzle is quite close to Egbert's ear) It is quite simple really. (thunders in a voice loud enough to shake the tavern) THIS IS MY SECTION OF HEAVEN, AND I CAN SAY WHAT I DAMN WELL PLEASE! IF YOU WISH TO BE ARGUIN' WITH A DRAGON, THEN IT WOULD BEHOOVE YOU TO CHOOSE A TOPIC WELL WORTH ARGUIN' ABOUT!
Egbert: (is startled out of his seat and glares angrily at Draco.) I remember why I never liked dragon movies before. You always act like overpaid drama queens! And you are overly fond of having all manner of horns and spikes with which to adorn yourselves. (takes his seat, taking Draco's silence for cowardice.)
Food arrives, and an angel sets buttered popcorn and a soda next to Egbert. Draco receives nothing, but they both share in the sight of the sashaying rear of the angel as she walks away.
Egbert: (notices Draco staring and turns red in the face.) I thought dragons were supposed to eat maidens, not stare at their ass!
Draco: (fixes Egbert with his yellow-eyed stare) Why can't I stare at what I please in heaven?
Egbert: (sputtering) Well, she's a human!
Draco: (calmly) And I'm a dragon. Ask her which one of us she'd prefer to wake up next to in the morning.
Egbert: (stands up and shakes with fury, giving the impression of an angry bowl of jello) That's downright disgusting! You don't talk about that in heaven! Come to think of it, the very idea of a dragon in heaven is absolutely bullsh**! I mean, it's just balderdash!
Draco: (smiles) And you give no thought to cursing in heaven?
Egbert: Not really. That kind of crap I can accept. But....Hey! (noticing one very interesting fact) Your brogue just disappeared then reappeared!
Draco: Of course (his smile grows broader) I often do that when near someone I'm thinking of bedding.
The whole thing becomes too much for the chubby little movie critic, and a cherub gives him his coat as he strides quickly out the door. The angel with the nice ass comes back and takes Egbert's place by Draco.
Angel: (sounds interested) I didn't know you swung both ways.
Draco: (getting up and unfurling his wings) I don't, lass. I just couldn't stand to hear my own lunch insult me.
The dragon flies out of the tavern in search of Egbert. Zoom in on the angel as she smiles and shakes her head. She knows that Mr. Egbert will soon be back in hell.
The sun shines merrily down on a medieval themed environment as it watches the affairs of heaven and earth. Zoom in to see a rather large tavern with a sign proudly proclaiming "Draco's Lair." The tavern has only the sky as its roof, but that doesn't seem to bother any of the current customers. Cupids and angels flit about waiting on tables. We see Draco tapping his claws on a table as he enjoys the music of an unseen harp. He looks up impatiently, searching the establishment for something.
Egbert: (enters the tavern a bit cautiously and sits down at Draco's table) I've escaped. I'm free. They thought they could keep me in that dreadful place. But I showed them. Yes, I did. Not even Hell can hold me.
Draco: (with an amused smile) Good eve to you, human.
Egbert: (is startled, but recognizes Draco as having been in a movie he saw once.) It's not evening Draco. But I'll overlook it this time because I rather like your brogue.
Draco: (shrugs) What you overlook or not is of no importance to me. But I will tell you why I say eve. (leans over so that his scaly muzzle is quite close to Egbert's ear) It is quite simple really. (thunders in a voice loud enough to shake the tavern) THIS IS MY SECTION OF HEAVEN, AND I CAN SAY WHAT I DAMN WELL PLEASE! IF YOU WISH TO BE ARGUIN' WITH A DRAGON, THEN IT WOULD BEHOOVE YOU TO CHOOSE A TOPIC WELL WORTH ARGUIN' ABOUT!
Egbert: (is startled out of his seat and glares angrily at Draco.) I remember why I never liked dragon movies before. You always act like overpaid drama queens! And you are overly fond of having all manner of horns and spikes with which to adorn yourselves. (takes his seat, taking Draco's silence for cowardice.)
Food arrives, and an angel sets buttered popcorn and a soda next to Egbert. Draco receives nothing, but they both share in the sight of the sashaying rear of the angel as she walks away.
Egbert: (notices Draco staring and turns red in the face.) I thought dragons were supposed to eat maidens, not stare at their ass!
Draco: (fixes Egbert with his yellow-eyed stare) Why can't I stare at what I please in heaven?
Egbert: (sputtering) Well, she's a human!
Draco: (calmly) And I'm a dragon. Ask her which one of us she'd prefer to wake up next to in the morning.
Egbert: (stands up and shakes with fury, giving the impression of an angry bowl of jello) That's downright disgusting! You don't talk about that in heaven! Come to think of it, the very idea of a dragon in heaven is absolutely bullsh**! I mean, it's just balderdash!
Draco: (smiles) And you give no thought to cursing in heaven?
Egbert: Not really. That kind of crap I can accept. But....Hey! (noticing one very interesting fact) Your brogue just disappeared then reappeared!
Draco: Of course (his smile grows broader) I often do that when near someone I'm thinking of bedding.
The whole thing becomes too much for the chubby little movie critic, and a cherub gives him his coat as he strides quickly out the door. The angel with the nice ass comes back and takes Egbert's place by Draco.
Angel: (sounds interested) I didn't know you swung both ways.
Draco: (getting up and unfurling his wings) I don't, lass. I just couldn't stand to hear my own lunch insult me.
The dragon flies out of the tavern in search of Egbert. Zoom in on the angel as she smiles and shakes her head. She knows that Mr. Egbert will soon be back in hell.
