Stargate SG-1

By white angel

Blue sky.

How he had missed to see it.

3 months stranded on a planet with red sky had been torture. He loved the blue sky on earth. Even on Abydos the sky was blue. If it hadn't been he probably never would have stayed.

Sha're.

He had really thought he loved her.

Now he knew it had only been guilt.

She had been a present for him. And he had accepted.

To stay had been the biggest thing he had ever done.

Maybe he had tried to escape himself.

He had been kicked out of his apartment, not only because he couldn't pay but because of the man they had caught him with in bed.

He wasn't gay or something –not at that time-. It had been the first time for him.

Everybody knew. He had been ashamed of himself.

Running off to a new world where nobody knew him, getting married and forgetting had been a relieve for him.

It was the only thing to do.

Then Jack came back, crashing into his little, peaceful world and destroyed everything.

Not that Sha're had been caught by Apophis, but the simple fact that he was back.

He hadn't wanted to admit it but sleeping with his wife he always thought of him. How it would be if it was Jack who touched him, Jack who kissed him, bringing him to ecstasy.

He had to admit that he never could have satisfied Sha're without him.

There was the guilt factor again.

But Sha're was dead now. Really dead.

He had searched for her, searched for his safe haven, the act that was supposed to be his life.

Searching for her had made it easier to hide his true feelings. The feelings for his best friend.

Jack.

The soldier who always had a quick comment on everything. His sarcasm. His graying hair. His strong, muscled body. His brown eyes which showed that he wasn't really that bad-assed. No, actually he was the most warm-hearted man he knew. On the outside he was Colonel Jack O'Neal, a tough soldier, never showing any real emotion but on the inside… he was a gentle, kind man, broken at the time they had met for the first time.

Now he was settled. He had a new job, a lot of responsibility and a so much hated scientist to yell at when something went wrong. Even if said scientist had nothing to do with it.

He hated to be yelled at, especially from Jack. His feelings went too deep.

He sighed and sat down on the rocks, overlooking Cheyenne Mountain.

This was his working place.

More like the station from which you were sent to your work most of the time.

"Enjoying the view?"

Daniel flinched a little, startled by the unexpected voice he had come so familiar with over the past few years.

"Jack."

Jack sat down by his side, his arm still resting on Daniel's shoulder.

"I think I'm getting old…" he trailed of, growling a little at his attempt to get more comfortable on the hard ground.

"You're not old, Jack."

"No? I'm almost 50 years old, Daniel."

"That means you're in your best years." Daniel grinned.

"ya think?"

He knew he was blushing. Damn… Too late to back off, Dannyboy…

"Yeah."

Jack stared at him, his eyes searching Daniel's. The younger man didn't know where to look, his eyes flickering restlessly before coming to a halt on Jack's brown ones.

What Daniel saw in them was… warmth. Tenderness. Could it be…?

No. this was Jack in front of him. His buddy, his straight buddy Jack.

Daniel didn't dare to hope. He didn't want to be disappointed. Not again.

"Come on, Space Monkey. Why don't we go and grab a beer?"

The moment was over as quickly as it had begun.

Daniel looked over to Jack who got up again, seeing him in front of the blue sky, how it framed his face and shook his head.

"I'd rather stay a little longer and just… forget it. I just wanne stay here a little longer."

"Oh, come on Danny… I made the effort of getting up on my old rusty legs to invite you and you turn me down? You can watch the sky from my rooftop just as well…"

the pleading look on Jacks face made Daniel give in. "All right, I'm coming."

There was something to that look, something desperate that made him worry a little. He couldn't pinpoint it but he was sure something would change tonight.

The drive to Jack's house was quiet, but more the awkward sort than the comfortable. Yep, Jack definitely had something on his mind.

"Why don't you go up already? You know the way… I'll be right there…"

Daniel nodded and went for the ladder to the roof where Jack so often watched stars at night. How he could still find peace in it where he knew what could be on each and every one of them.

He sat down and looked at the sky again.

"Dreaming, Daniel?" A beer bottle was handed to him over his shoulder. He took it and held it, fumbling at the label.

"Sort of… Jack?"

"Yeah?"

"What do you wanne talk about?"

"What?"

"You wouldn't have been this insistent if you had nothing on your mind."

"You know me too well, Danny."

Jack sighed, taking a long sip of his beer before he continued. "I need to tell you something…"

Daniel waited patiently, but he was anxious to hear what Jack had to say.

"Danny, I… damn, I'm not good with words. Just know, what I will do next… it's not a joke and I'm not insane…" he trailed off, quickly taking Daniel's face in his hands and kissing him. The bottle in his hands fell, glass scattering on the floor. "I'm just in love." Jack put his forehead to his and looked him in the eyes. "With you."

After a long moment he pulled away and the loss of contact made Daniel's heart ache. "I'm sorry…"

Jack made an attempt to leave the roof.

"Jack…"

Sad eyes turned to him, despair written clearly on his face.

Daniel slowly walked over to him, touching his arm, pulling him back a bit so he stood right in front of him, cupping his face and kissing him back. His stomach turned, but not from disgust but from pure love.

He felt his blood rush down to his groin, gently coaxing Jack's mouth open, exploring the warm depths of it. Jack responded, their tongues fighting for dominance until they were both breathless.

Reluctantly they parted, gasping for air when Jack spoke: "You… you're not uh… disgusted or something?"

"No, why should I?"

"Because… because I… this is not right."

"Is it not? Then why does it feel so right to me, Jack? Doesn't it feel right to you?"

"Yes, it does, but… you… you're my best friend, Danny… I'm not supposed to fall in love with you."

"But you did."

"Yes."

Daniel smiled, putting their foreheads together. "So did I."

Jack looked at him, all his love written on his face, his affection reflected in his brown eyes.

"Let's go inside. I think now we really need to talk."

Jack nodded and went inside, his fingers entwined with Daniel's, gazing over at him as if to make sure he was still there.

They kissed in front of the door before going in, the door closing behind them.

The END