Title: Angel Watching Over Me
Author: Ashley
Pairing: V/H, of course
Rating: PG, mostly for implied angst
Disclaimer: I do not own Escaflowne or any of its characters, but you knew that. . . I hope.
But I do own this story and all the twists the plot takes.
Dedication: To anyone who took the time to review this,
and especially to those who review again and again with helpful (and nice) comments.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
(five years later)
Hitomi sighed as she settled onto the wooden bench inside a flower-covered gazebo. The gardens were always so lovely this time of year. The blooms lasted longer here, or maybe it just seemed that way. This was her favorite spot to spend an afternoon, with the sun warming her limbs and the scent of a dozen different flowers settling around her like a gently perfumed cloud.
The book that she had brought along to read lay on the bench beside her, forgotten in the simple joy of being outside and surrounded by nature's beauty. Soon her thoughts drifted back to the past, when things hadn't been so pleasant.
Returning to Gaea had been the best thing to happen to her. She had needed the peace that only that world seemed to offer. For a long time after the accident, she had carried her anger, sadness, and resentment deep inside her, sharing her pain with no one. Finally they had started to weigh her down, until she felt like she was drowning in a life that should have been filled with happiness and love.
She loved her family and friends; that was something she would never deny. But they just hadn't been what she needed at that time. Their pity and compassion wasn't helping. What she had needed was someone who would make her take a good long look at what she had allowed herself to become. Someone who could make her care about something, anything again.
That someone had been Van.
When he had come into the room that day, Hitomi would have gladly wished him to the farthest reaches of the planet. But he wouldn't go. He had refused to leave the room until she listened to what he had to say. It had filled her with anger, the first emotion she had felt in too long a time.
Just to see him there, looking like a dream come true, had infuriated her more. How dare he come back into her life after seven years of silence? The man didn't have the decency to be dead, or suffering from amnesia. No, he was fine; he had just decided what the best thing for her was and carried it out. As though she were in need of someone to make all the important choices for her.
Hitomi shifted a little as the conversation of that day drifted through her mind. Van had knelt there, looking shockingly sincere and hopeful, asking her to marry him. Telling her that he was sorry about everything he had done, promising her he would spend a lifetime making it up to her.
A part of her was screaming for her to say yes, to be with the only person she had ever truly loved. Another part warned her to remember he was the person who had broken her heart, then stomped on the leftover pieces.
She had said no.
Van's face had fallen and he went so pale she had been worried he might faint. She hadn't wanted to hurt him, having just cleared the air between them. When she'd told him she wanted to be friends, she had meant it with all her heart. He did care about her; she knew that with complete certainty. But she wasn't ready to put her heart on the line when the rest of her needed to get better first.
Everyone had been so helpful after they heard her story. Millerna had spent days reading everything about spinal injuries that she could. Dryden had used his connections to scour the lands for any remedies, potions, and even old wives' tales that might help in any way. Allen had spent time each day helping her rebuild her muscles and strength. Good food and lots of rest had completed her new regiment.
It had taken a good bit of time, but the results were more than worth every aching muscle and foul medicine. Though she would probably never get back to where she used to be, she was much better than when she had arrived. She could walk with relative ease, no cane needed. Her back no longer gave her problems unless she happened to twist the wrong way or work it too hard, as was to be expected.
But if the physical healing was a source of happiness, the mental healing was bliss. Hitomi had told everything to people who cared about her; people she knew would stay by her side no matter what. It hadn't bothered her much to tell them about her worst thoughts and feelings, having been present for some of their own worst times.
Through it all, Van had been there, traveling to visit her every chance he got. Inviting her to stay in Fanelia. Bringing along things he thought she might like. And every time she saw him, she fell a little more in love with the man he had become. But still some part of her kept her guard up, trying not to envision him as a permanent part of her life. She didn't think she could stand being abandoned again.
But one day, he refused to be put off. No longer would he accept just friendship. It was everything or nothing, he said, and she would have to decide which it was to be.
Hitomi had looked at him, knowing tears had filled her eyes. "Why do we have to do anything? Why can't things stay this way?" She had known even as she spoke what his answer would be. But somehow she needed to hear the words.
"I can't live my life in limbo, Hitomi. I won't. I've told you before that I love you and want to marry you. That may never change. Every time I see you, my heart becomes whole, the sun shines brighter, and nothing can upset me. But then I have to say goodbye, and a little piece of me dies. I can't do that anymore, Hitomi."
"How do I know you'll mean this tomorrow? Or a year from now? How do I know this isn't the result of some misplaced pity and guilt? I couldn't stand it if I were nothing more than a burden to you, Van. And you mean too much to me for me to let you do that to yourself."
Van had knelt before he, looking into her eyes. His feelings had been written all over his face. "You can't know everything about the future, Hitomi. No one can. You have to trust me, and how I feel about you. But most of all, you have to trust yourself.
"You can turn me down a million times and still be who you are. You're a strong, caring, brave person all on your own, and you don't need anyone to be a part of your life for you to survive. You never really needed me, Hitomi. But I'm hoping you'll want me."
A shout of laughter brought her back from her foray into the past. A toddler came around the corner, sunlight shining off his black hair. When he saw her sitting there, his green eyes filled with joy and he giggled again before launching himself into her arms. Hugging her son to her, Hitomi looked up as a shadow fell over them.
Van leaned against the wall, smiling gently. She smiled back, stretching an arm out to him. He took her hand, moving to sit beside her on the bench. Neither said a word because they didn't have to. Her thoughts were his thoughts, her feelings his as well. As they sat there, cuddled together on that bench, she knew they were thinking about the afternoon she had finally said yes.
They had spent all afternoon arguing about whose fault it was that they had taken so long to get to where they had both wanted to be. Van blamed himself for not keeping in contact and for not being more open before she left Gaea the first time. Hitomi blamed herself for being so mean and stubborn, and for not believing in him as much as he seemed to believe in her. Finally, Van had laughingly called it to a halt.
"Let's just agree that we're both idiots who almost missed out on the best thing that could have happened to us, and spend the rest of out lives making it up to each other."
She'd smiled at him then, reaching out to wrap him in her arms. "Sounds like a plan to me."
And what a plan it was. Every day was filled with happiness she had almost given away. Now she had a husband she adored as much as he adored her back and a son the embodied every good thing she wanted in life.
They had named him Kenny, a tribute to an uncle he would never know past the stories they told him at bedtime. Already he showed his father's boundless energy and his mother's sensitivity. Hitomi had no doubt he would be a great older brother.
As they walked back inside, she laid a hand over her abdomen, feeling the life that grew there. It was too soon for morning sickness or tiredness, or any of the things that usually told someone they were about to be a parent, but still, she knew. She could sense the child there, was as sure of its existence as she was that the sky was blue and the grass was green.
It would be a girl this time, she thought to herself. Maybe they should name her after Van's mother. Varia, maybe.
As her husband turned to smile at her, Hitomi gave a silent thanks to the angels that must surely be watching over her for life to be this good, and a returning smile to the angel that walked by her side. She was home.
THE END
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
A/N: That's it. The end. I'm feeling pretty sad, which may herald a sequel sometime in the future. But for now, I hope everyone enjoyed reading this story as much as I enjoyed writing it. Please let me know what you thought.
Author: Ashley
Pairing: V/H, of course
Rating: PG, mostly for implied angst
Disclaimer: I do not own Escaflowne or any of its characters, but you knew that. . . I hope.
But I do own this story and all the twists the plot takes.
Dedication: To anyone who took the time to review this,
and especially to those who review again and again with helpful (and nice) comments.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
(five years later)
Hitomi sighed as she settled onto the wooden bench inside a flower-covered gazebo. The gardens were always so lovely this time of year. The blooms lasted longer here, or maybe it just seemed that way. This was her favorite spot to spend an afternoon, with the sun warming her limbs and the scent of a dozen different flowers settling around her like a gently perfumed cloud.
The book that she had brought along to read lay on the bench beside her, forgotten in the simple joy of being outside and surrounded by nature's beauty. Soon her thoughts drifted back to the past, when things hadn't been so pleasant.
Returning to Gaea had been the best thing to happen to her. She had needed the peace that only that world seemed to offer. For a long time after the accident, she had carried her anger, sadness, and resentment deep inside her, sharing her pain with no one. Finally they had started to weigh her down, until she felt like she was drowning in a life that should have been filled with happiness and love.
She loved her family and friends; that was something she would never deny. But they just hadn't been what she needed at that time. Their pity and compassion wasn't helping. What she had needed was someone who would make her take a good long look at what she had allowed herself to become. Someone who could make her care about something, anything again.
That someone had been Van.
When he had come into the room that day, Hitomi would have gladly wished him to the farthest reaches of the planet. But he wouldn't go. He had refused to leave the room until she listened to what he had to say. It had filled her with anger, the first emotion she had felt in too long a time.
Just to see him there, looking like a dream come true, had infuriated her more. How dare he come back into her life after seven years of silence? The man didn't have the decency to be dead, or suffering from amnesia. No, he was fine; he had just decided what the best thing for her was and carried it out. As though she were in need of someone to make all the important choices for her.
Hitomi shifted a little as the conversation of that day drifted through her mind. Van had knelt there, looking shockingly sincere and hopeful, asking her to marry him. Telling her that he was sorry about everything he had done, promising her he would spend a lifetime making it up to her.
A part of her was screaming for her to say yes, to be with the only person she had ever truly loved. Another part warned her to remember he was the person who had broken her heart, then stomped on the leftover pieces.
She had said no.
Van's face had fallen and he went so pale she had been worried he might faint. She hadn't wanted to hurt him, having just cleared the air between them. When she'd told him she wanted to be friends, she had meant it with all her heart. He did care about her; she knew that with complete certainty. But she wasn't ready to put her heart on the line when the rest of her needed to get better first.
Everyone had been so helpful after they heard her story. Millerna had spent days reading everything about spinal injuries that she could. Dryden had used his connections to scour the lands for any remedies, potions, and even old wives' tales that might help in any way. Allen had spent time each day helping her rebuild her muscles and strength. Good food and lots of rest had completed her new regiment.
It had taken a good bit of time, but the results were more than worth every aching muscle and foul medicine. Though she would probably never get back to where she used to be, she was much better than when she had arrived. She could walk with relative ease, no cane needed. Her back no longer gave her problems unless she happened to twist the wrong way or work it too hard, as was to be expected.
But if the physical healing was a source of happiness, the mental healing was bliss. Hitomi had told everything to people who cared about her; people she knew would stay by her side no matter what. It hadn't bothered her much to tell them about her worst thoughts and feelings, having been present for some of their own worst times.
Through it all, Van had been there, traveling to visit her every chance he got. Inviting her to stay in Fanelia. Bringing along things he thought she might like. And every time she saw him, she fell a little more in love with the man he had become. But still some part of her kept her guard up, trying not to envision him as a permanent part of her life. She didn't think she could stand being abandoned again.
But one day, he refused to be put off. No longer would he accept just friendship. It was everything or nothing, he said, and she would have to decide which it was to be.
Hitomi had looked at him, knowing tears had filled her eyes. "Why do we have to do anything? Why can't things stay this way?" She had known even as she spoke what his answer would be. But somehow she needed to hear the words.
"I can't live my life in limbo, Hitomi. I won't. I've told you before that I love you and want to marry you. That may never change. Every time I see you, my heart becomes whole, the sun shines brighter, and nothing can upset me. But then I have to say goodbye, and a little piece of me dies. I can't do that anymore, Hitomi."
"How do I know you'll mean this tomorrow? Or a year from now? How do I know this isn't the result of some misplaced pity and guilt? I couldn't stand it if I were nothing more than a burden to you, Van. And you mean too much to me for me to let you do that to yourself."
Van had knelt before he, looking into her eyes. His feelings had been written all over his face. "You can't know everything about the future, Hitomi. No one can. You have to trust me, and how I feel about you. But most of all, you have to trust yourself.
"You can turn me down a million times and still be who you are. You're a strong, caring, brave person all on your own, and you don't need anyone to be a part of your life for you to survive. You never really needed me, Hitomi. But I'm hoping you'll want me."
A shout of laughter brought her back from her foray into the past. A toddler came around the corner, sunlight shining off his black hair. When he saw her sitting there, his green eyes filled with joy and he giggled again before launching himself into her arms. Hugging her son to her, Hitomi looked up as a shadow fell over them.
Van leaned against the wall, smiling gently. She smiled back, stretching an arm out to him. He took her hand, moving to sit beside her on the bench. Neither said a word because they didn't have to. Her thoughts were his thoughts, her feelings his as well. As they sat there, cuddled together on that bench, she knew they were thinking about the afternoon she had finally said yes.
They had spent all afternoon arguing about whose fault it was that they had taken so long to get to where they had both wanted to be. Van blamed himself for not keeping in contact and for not being more open before she left Gaea the first time. Hitomi blamed herself for being so mean and stubborn, and for not believing in him as much as he seemed to believe in her. Finally, Van had laughingly called it to a halt.
"Let's just agree that we're both idiots who almost missed out on the best thing that could have happened to us, and spend the rest of out lives making it up to each other."
She'd smiled at him then, reaching out to wrap him in her arms. "Sounds like a plan to me."
And what a plan it was. Every day was filled with happiness she had almost given away. Now she had a husband she adored as much as he adored her back and a son the embodied every good thing she wanted in life.
They had named him Kenny, a tribute to an uncle he would never know past the stories they told him at bedtime. Already he showed his father's boundless energy and his mother's sensitivity. Hitomi had no doubt he would be a great older brother.
As they walked back inside, she laid a hand over her abdomen, feeling the life that grew there. It was too soon for morning sickness or tiredness, or any of the things that usually told someone they were about to be a parent, but still, she knew. She could sense the child there, was as sure of its existence as she was that the sky was blue and the grass was green.
It would be a girl this time, she thought to herself. Maybe they should name her after Van's mother. Varia, maybe.
As her husband turned to smile at her, Hitomi gave a silent thanks to the angels that must surely be watching over her for life to be this good, and a returning smile to the angel that walked by her side. She was home.
THE END
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
A/N: That's it. The end. I'm feeling pretty sad, which may herald a sequel sometime in the future. But for now, I hope everyone enjoyed reading this story as much as I enjoyed writing it. Please let me know what you thought.
