Lois and Clark:
The Stupid Adventures of
Superman
Disclaimer: I don't own anything
about this story. I didn't actually
write it in the first place either. A
friend of mine wrote it, originally as a script for a movie we were going to
make, but we never actually got around to doing it. I've taken a little creative license with it, taken out the
commercials and stuff, but it's pretty much the same. And, oh yeah, the characters don't belong to me. They belong to DC comics, or the TV show,
whichever. It was based on the TV show,
so think of Dean Cain and Teri Hatcher.
Wow, this is a long disclaimer.
Let's get to the story now.
"So, what have we got so far?"
Mindy Church, The Mad Scientist,
and Jackson Luthor were all gathered together as the 'We Find Yet Another Way
To Kill Superman Every Episode Committee' in their secret lair.
"Well, frankly, we've tried
everything… Kryptonite…" Jackson started.
"Someone always manages to save
him!" Mindy interrupted.
"…A deadly virus from Krypton…"
Jackson continued.
The mad scientist rolled his
eyes. "Ms. Lane's psychotic father
found a cure."
Jackson went on. "…Red Kryptonite…"
Mindy jumped to her feet. "I don't even want to talk about Red
Kryptonite! Look everybody, I'm
starting up Intergang again, and in order to do that, we're just going to hafta
get Superman…"
"Dead!" The rest of them chimed in.
"Right!" Mindy exclaimed. She started pacing around the room as she
spoke. "So we need something
original." She looked at the mad scientist.
"I dunno."
Mindy sighed and looked at Jackson.
"Ditto."
Mindy rolls her eyes. "All outta ideas?"
Both Jackson and the mad scientist
nod. "Then I guess I'll just have to
kill you." She pulls a huge frying pan
out from behind her back and bops Jackson over the head, but hesitates when she
comes to the mad scientist. "Mmmmm… I
think I'll keep you, for a little while.
But remember, your life is in my hands, bub."