Young Ms. Figg Chapter Ten: A Fine Mess


Young Ms. Figg Chapter Ten: A Fine Mess

Nothing. Absolutely nothing. There was no sign of anything in Ella's Aunt's house aside from the stray cat hair that had begun to pile up in the corners since Ella left at the end of the summer. There was no sign of magic... dark or otherwise. There were no clues as to what had happened to Perkins... and this worried Ella. She was actually on her hands and knees examining the part of the carpet upon which Perkins body had lain and all she appeared to be getting out of it was a nose full of dust.

Behind there was a very faint popping noise. Without thought Ella rolled over into a crouching position, her wand out and ready.

"Dammit, Severus! You gave me such a start! You shouldn't sneak up on people. I was milliseconds away from cursing you into the last century!"

Severus Snape slowly folded his arms, his face unreadable.

"I would hardly call apparating 'sneaking' up on you, Ella."

Ella took a deep breath and rose to her feet, "No, I don't suppose it would be if I was expecting you. As it is, I'm investigating a murder and not expecting company."

"Point Taken," Snape conceded.

"So why are you here?" Ella asked, looking worried, "Has something else-"

Snape held up his hand to interrupt Ella, "No, no, I'm here to help."

"Well, there doesn't seem to be much to help with, Severus, I've been over the house twice and I can't find a thing. I was just taking a last look before heading next door."

"Indeed?"

"Feel free to double check it if you want, Severus."

"That, I'm certain, would be a waste of time."

Ella's eyebrow rose at this, but she said nothing.

"You were heading next door to the Dursley's?" Snape asked.

"Yes. I double checked to see they weren't there then started over here."

"Well, then, shall we?"

Mrs. Next Door, on the other side of the Dursley's house, had been quite interested to watch all the hubbub one house over. An odd assortment of cars and an even odder assortment of people had gone in and out. Most of the persons had looked quite tense. After a short time everyone cleared out and Elspeth Figg was escorted to a car and driven away.

She shook her head. Ever since Mrs. Figg won that sweepstakes, things had grown odder and odder. First there was that "flower child" person, her niece, who had stayed all summer. Then Mrs. Figg finally returned, the toast of the bridge club, mind. Soon after, that odd gentleman rented the house across the way and actually started courting her, Old Mrs. Figg! Now this.

Mrs. Next Door stirred the cup of tea she was holding a bit more vigorously than was strictly necessary as she gazed out the window that afforded her the best view of Numbers 2 and 4 Privet drive. As she watched she noticed two figures in black robes making their way to the front door of Number Four. She could tell the pair was a man and a woman, although she couldn't seem to get a good look at the woman. The man, however, had looked around as the woman with him tried the door. He had pale features with dark hair and eyes ...quite sinister in her opinion. Mrs. Next Door stepped a little closer to the window as the woman stopped jiggling the door and took something out of her black robes.

A moment later the pair entered the house, closing the door behind them. Mrs. Next Door put down her cup of tea and picked up the telephone.

As Ella Figg shut the door behind her she frowned. "Is that a good sign or a bad sign?" she wondered aloud.

"Is what?"

"The doors being locked... the side door was locked, too - when I arrived earlier."

"Ella, I truly couldn't say."

"That's alright, I was just thinking out loud. Severus, I suggest that you start upstairs and I will begin down here."

Snape nodded and walked off purposefully looking for the staircase.

Snape mounted the stairs and began to search the rooms upstairs. As he went from room to room, he was shaking his head without realizing it and grunting with disapproval. He had begun in what must be the guest bedroom: a nauseating explosion of flowery prints and lace. It was immaculate but completely devoid of information. The master bedroom was next. It's decor was similar to the guest bedroom but a bit more restrained. There was a lot less lace and great deal more photography on display. Photo after photo of a round, piggy, blond boy Snape could only assume was Potter's cousin Dudley. Snape picked up a photo of the entire family: Dudley and a taller version of Dudley with a mustache... that would be the uncle: Vernon. Next to the two round specimens stood a stiff, tight-faced woman: Petunia Evans Dursley. Snape held the photograph closer to his face looking for some resemblance to her sister Lily. He supposed there were certain physical characteristics in common, but the woman in the photo couldn't be more different from the young woman Snape had known at Hogwarts. With a sigh, Snape put the photo in his pocket... it might come in handy.

There was no sign of disturbance in the master bedroom. There was also no sign of trouble in the next bedroom. This one had to belong to the cousin, Dudley. It was packed floor to ceiling with a dizzying array of muggle toys and devices. The walls were adorned with muggle posters of a football (soccer) team and several scantily clad women. It was a good thing they were standing still, Severus thought, or they'd have trouble keeping what little they had on.

The bathroom yielded no information, either. There was only one more bedroom, the one that must belong to Potter. Snape was surprised when he opened the door. This room was nothing like the others. The floor was bare, the furniture spartan, and the decoration non-existent. The only thing in the room that couldn't be described as empty was a set of bookshelves crammed with broken muggle devices and toys like the ones in the boy Dudley's room. Somehow Snape doubted these were Harry's.

As he started down the stairs, he noticed that Ella had the door open to a cupboard beneath them. As she heard his tread on the stair, she leaned back and said, "I can't believe it."

"What?"

"This. Come look at it."

Confused, Snape moved down the stairs and around to the doorway of the cupboard. Ella had found a light and turned it on. There wasn't much in it... just a camp bed and a colony of spiders. Snape put his wand in his belt as he ducked in to get a closer look... he didn't know what Ella thought she saw... He crouched facing the back wall and ran his fingers along the baseboard, coming up with nothing but a few stray spiders.

"I don't understand. What did you see, Ella?" he asked. When she did not answer he turned around to see a muggle law enforcement officer with one arm across Ella's throat and the other holding her hands behind her back.

"Hold it right there!" another officer said, lunging into the closet to grab a stunned Snape by the arms. As he jerked Snape to his feet and began to drag him out of the closet, Snape tried to lay hands on his wand and found himself shoved roughly into a wall, his arms twisted painfully behind him and placed in some sort of lightweight but very sturdy irons. The officer was then checking his pockets and patting him down.

"Hey, he's got one, too," the officer said pulling Snape's wand from his waistband and holding it up, "It's just like the one she was going for."

His partner snorted, "Well they wasn't going to shoot us, that's for sure. Maybe they were going to put us to sleep by conducting a symphony or summat."

Snape was spun around and shoved back into the wall. He could then see that Ella was being held against the wall with her hands behind her back, no doubt also in irons. She was coughing and clearing her throat. He must have been putting pressure on her throat with his arm, that's why she didn't call out, Snape thought angrily.

The officer who had attacked him was holding up the silver picture frame with the photo of the Dursleys in it.

"Tut, tut, didn't manage to knick much did ye? Alright, then, you are both under arrest for breaking and entering as well as for theft. I must warn you that anything you might say will be taken down and may be given in evidence against you.." Snape's mind was reeling. Arrested. Arrested by the muggle police.

It began to sink in as they were both taken and roughly pushed into the back seat of a muggle police car. Ella was still coughing, a murderous look spreading on her face. He watched the officers get into the front seat, the one who had choked Ella holding the silver photo frame ... and their wands!

If they couldn't get their hands on their wands they were in trouble indeed...

Snape and Ella did not speak to each other during the ride to the police station, or rather the "Law Enforcement Centre" a building that seemed to serve as police station, jail, and courthouse.

They were hustled inside, past a large counter and into a room full of desks. At the far end of the room they could see a large cage divided into three sections, each with its own door. Ah, muggle jail, how quaint, thought Snape irritably.

Each officer sat their respective prisoner down next to a desk and pulled out a clipboard and pen. The officer with Ella Figg barked at her, "Name?"

Ella cleared her throat and began to speak her name but was interrupted by a fit of coughing. With a disgruntled look her officer got up and headed for the water cooler.

"Name?" Snape's officer asked.

Severus considered this for a moment. Right now they were in the custody of muggle police with no means of contacting anyone in the wizarding community. On the faint chance that it might help, it was probably best to give his real name. After all, once he was back in the magical community it wouldn't matter if he had a muggle police record. He fixed his officer with a level stare.

"Severus Snape."

The officer raised a brow and wrote it down.

Snape was able to answer the next question providing his birthdate -but that was where his useful information ended. There was no phone, no address, no other kind of identifying information he could give. This did not make the officer happy. Ella's officer had found himself in similar straights. Finally the officers decided to take fingerprints and mug shots and put them in their cells.

When the two officers agreed to this, Ella gave them a sour look. For his part, Snape was mystified, but not for long. He watched in disbelief as the officer took off the irons and then put each of his fingers individually on a black square of ink and then pressed them onto a piece of thick muggle paper. Then, they handed him a card with his name and a number on it, put him against the wall and flashed an incredibly blinding light at him. By the time the spots cleared from his eyes, Snape was being shoved through the door of a cell and listening to the sound of the door clanging shut behind him.

Moments later Ella was pushed into the cell beside him. She was still wiping at her inky fingers with the wet paper towel they had given her. "Disgusting," she muttered in a slightly hoarse voice.

"Indeed." Snape replied.

Figg looked up to regard him through the bars and he could see a red spot on her neck beginning to change colour to a faint purplish blue.

"Are you quite alright?" Snape asked pointing to her neck.

She reached up and rubbed it absentmindedly, "Oh, no permanent damage done. It's more my pride that's been damaged. Dammit, I can't believe I let them sneak up on us!"

Snape said nothing. He was thinking much the same thing but was wise enough to know that now was not the time to point that out.

"What happens next? Do you know?" he asked instead.

"Well, I'm no expert on muggle law enforcement but I'm pretty sure we'll have to go before some judge or magistrate to be charged. The problem is, they can't identify us so, no matter how that comes out, we're stuck until we can figure a way out of this mess."

She kicked the leg of the iron cot in her cell, winced in pain, then kicked it again.

"I hardly think that will help," Snape growled.

"Oh, how do you know? I wouldn't exactly call you the expert on expressing or managing your emotions, Severus."

"I beg your pardon?" Snape said, a dangerous edge creeping into his voice.

"Dammit! I can't believe we're in this mess!" she said ignoring Snape's comment.

"Well, neither can I!" Snape shot back, "How exactly does someone with your training and experience fail to hear a couple of muggles sneaking up on her?"

Figg colored, anger flashing in her eyes, "I don't know, Severus," she snapped, "How did you fail to see them coming down the stairs?"

The officers heard the prisoners begin to bicker and shook their heads. Typical. It figured a couple of weirdos like them would turn on each other.

"Ed," the one said to the other, "why don't you start trying to figure out who those two nutters are while I call the homeowners, eh?"