The three-PM-tomorrow deadline found Logan waiting outside Max's building, car keys in hand, dreading the moment when a very pissed-off Max would become even more pissed. The moment when he explained that his contact had rushed to his sick mother's bedside and couldn't possibly get his hands on that case of oil until Sunday at the earliest.

Which was how it turned out. Upon hearing the news Max cut loose with a spectacular tirade right there on the sidewalk, ending with the outraged question, "Now what am I supposed to do?"

In answer Logan held up the car keys.

"What's that mean? Are you lending me your car?"

"No," he replied. "I'm driving you out there. Get in."

Max stalked past him, jerked the passenger door open, then stood with hands on hips. "Where's your bag?" she demanded.

"Don't have one," he answered, trying to roll past her, but she blocked his way.

"You're not staying? You're going to dump me out there with no transportation?" Her voice rose indignantly.

"Max," he said, as patiently and quietly as he could, "get in the car, and let me get in the car, and I'll explain, okay?" After a final glare she threw her backpack on the floor and sat with arms crossed, refusing to so much as look at him. They passed the sector checkpoint and got on the highway in ominous silence.

Finally she said, "So are you gonna sit there, or are you gonna break this down for me about how you're not sticking around but you're not dumping me out there either?"

Logan glanced over at her. She was still furious, and she still wouldn't look at him, and in spite of all that his heart melted at the sight of her. For a moment he was tempted to hope that maybe just a little of that disappointment was about him, wanting to have him around for a day or two ... and then he caught himself. That was now forbidden thinking. His voice was colder than he meant it to be when he answered her.

"I'm not dumping you out there, Max. I'm dropping you off. If you need to go somewhere Sam and David do have a truck, you know. It's not like all they have is a horse and buggy."

"Would have been better with my bike."

"Again, Max, I'm sorry about your bike."

"And if it's so great out there, why aren't you gonna hang?"

Logan sighed. If only he had remembered to pick up that damned case of oil, he wouldn't have to answer that question, now or later at the farm when Sam and David asked it more politely. "You've seen the house, Max. It's old. Narrow doorways, two sets of stairs ... should I keep going, or are you getting the picture?"

For the first time since yesterday her face softened. "Don't be an idiot. I'll cover it. You shouldn't have to stay away from your friends on account of --"

He cut her off. "I don't want you to cover it. You're there for Maria, not for me, remember?"

"Ever heard of multi-tasking?" she snapped, and when he didn't answer she folded her arms again and resumed staring out the passenger window. Then, after several silent miles: "If we're not gonna talk, can we at least have some music?"

"You can check, but I don't think I brought any CDs."

Actually, he knew he hadn't, but searching would keep her busy, and give him time to collect his feelings, which were threatening to overwhelm him despite his earlier resolve. The last thing he wanted to hear at the moment was music.

He had more or less stopped listening to music since the shooting, even at home. He didn't like the emotions it provoked in him, or the memories of freedom and health and how it felt to dance, or any of those other things that were now gone from his life. He had made the mistake of music the afternoon he drove Max and Zack to the cabin to begin their flight to Canada, trying to cover the awkward silence in the car. By that night his heart had been breaking. The night he truly realized for the first time how much he cared for Max. Now they were always linked together in his mind, music and Max, and today he didn't want either one of them there. This trip, which he hadn't wanted to make in the first place -- and wouldn't have had to make if it were not for his own stupidity -- was going to be hard enough.

It might have been fun to make this trip with her, he thought regretfully. Working together to help Maria would have made it safe, would have set the kinds of boundaries and limits on his behavior that he had to struggle to impose on himself. But now, given Max's state of mind, he could kiss that opportunity goodbye.

And of course, the part of it he really wanted to kiss goodbye drew closer with every passing mile. That was the moment he had learned, in this past year, to dread. The moment anyone from his old life met him for the first time in the wheelchair.

No matter how hard they tried, no matter how good their intentions, they could never quite hide their reactions. Sometimes it was pity, sometimes it was sadness, sometimes it was discomfort. He had learned after the first few excruciatingly awkward times that he had to take the lead, because no one else ever really knew how to act.

Even tough-as-nails Max had been hesistant, tentative, unsure of him and herself, the first time. He had only been able to stand her unspoken sympathy by reminding himself that at least she had showed up, which a lot of other people, people he'd known much longer, hadn't been able to do. He had been cold and tough and it had done both of them good --

"You missed the turn," Max said suddenly.

"What?"

"I said, you missed the turn. Back there." Max pointed her thumb over her shoulder.

Enough wallowing. Trying to ignore his sinking heart, Logan made a U-turn and pulled into the lane that led to the farmhouse.

As it turned out, though, he wasn't the center of attention at all. That honor went to Max, who spotted Maria waiting on the porch and practically jumped out of the car as it rolled to a stop. By the time Logan shut off the engine David and Sam had joined them, and all Logan could see of Max was the top of her dark head as everyone embraced her. Watching from the car, he smiled. She looked so right in the middle of a loving family.

"Hey!" Over Max's shoulder David finally noticed him. He bounded down the porch steps, reaching in through the car window to grasp Logan's hand, grinning. "You devil! I thought you weren't coming!"

"Long story. I ended up playing chauffeur." Logan suddenly realized that despite his fears it was wonderful to see David again. He found himself returning the handshake gladly.

"Lucky you." David glanced up at the porch, where Max stood with her arm around Maria. "It's good to see you, man. Can I help you with anything?" There it was, the unavoidable. Logan sighed.

"You can grab that bag over there. I've got the rest, thanks." By the time David retrieved Max's backpack from the passenger side of the car and returned to the driver's side, Logan was nearly finished getting out of the car. He had learned early on that if he was quick and efficient about unloading and setting up the chair, other people were usually happy to stand back and let him do his thing without feeling obligated to help. Which was just the way Logan liked it.

Today, the whole busy process spared him from looking into David's eyes. He didn't really want to see what was there. Max, Maria, and Sam had already disappeared into the house. David set the backpack on the porch and said, "Can I show you around?"

"Lead the way," Logan replied with more confidence than he actually felt. There was a big difference between wheeling the chair over the smooth hardwood apartment floors and the sidewalks and parking lots in Seattle, and this hard, cold, bumpy, farmyard that actually sloped up to the barn. Logan let David walk ahead while he tried to adjust to the terrain. Good thing he'd been working out. Still, the effort, not to mention the anxiety, made him breathless and sweaty, even in the winter chill. He was concentrating too hard to listen to casual conversation.

"--fifty cows now," David was saying proudly as they stopped next to a pasture fence. Logan quickly put his hands in his lap to hide the trembling in his arms. "I'm almost afraid to say it, but I think I'm going to turn a small profit this year. Not quite what you'd have expected from me back at Yale, is it?"

"Yeah. Funny how things turn out, huh?" He hadn't meant that to be about himself at all, but somehow the bitterness crept into his voice anyway. Instantly David became serious.

"I'm sorry. Here I am babbling about myself and I haven't even asked how you're doing." But that's good, Logan wanted to say. You don't know how great it feels when people forget. But before he could find a way to tell David so, the door of the farmhouse banged open and Max was shouting across the yard.

"I'm starving! Dinner's ready!"

David waved back at her. "Well, let's go eat," he said to Logan.

Logan's heart sank. Sometimes forgetting could go too far. How on earth was he going to get into the house? He'd rather drive back to Seattle on an empty stomach than be carried inside.

"Hey Max, come out here a second. I need you," David shouted over his head.

Max appeared immediately. As she walked across the yard Logan couldn't help noticing that she had cheered up a good deal since the dismal car ride. She still wouldn't look at him, but at least she wasn't scowling any more. She looked beautiful. She was always so beautiful when she was happy.

"Over here." David slid open the door of a weathered gray shed built over a cinder block foundation and disappeared inside. Max followed him. What were they going in there for? Impatiently Logan checked his watch. If he was going to drive back to town hungry, he wanted to get it over with.

There was a scraping sound from inside the shed, then David and Max appeared carrying a long rectangle of wood supported by planks. In spite of his mood, Logan had to chuckle to himself. David had no idea, of course, that Max was allowing him to hold one end just for show. She could easily have carried it on her own. Maybe even with one hand. "What's that?" he asked.

"My tractor ramp," David told him, as Max began to walk backwards towards the porch steps. "We use it to drive up into the shed. If it can hold me and a tractor, it should hold you, right?" It took Logan a moment to realize that it was a serious question.

"Yeah," he answered after a moment. "Yeah. It should."

How about that.