I walked down the empty corridors of the Garden.
Inside the ballroom, I could hear happy shouts and screams.
They were still celebrating, as far as I could tell.
They were celebrating Miss Edea and Mr.Cid's baby.
I didn't want to go in, but I had to.
Edea had asked me to give a speech.
I supposed that that was what happened when you were among the best.
I reached the ballroom.
I stopped, hesitant.
SI rested a hand on the doornob.
::What can it hurt to give it a try:: I thought.
I entered and stared around.
The party was in full swing.
Edea and Cid were surrounded by presents and students.
I walked slowly to it.
I added my present to the pile and waited for them to notice me.
It didn't take too long.
Edea swept over to me, smiling.
I wish I had the grace and dignity she had.
She welcomed me and told me that I was to speak at 8:00.
I said O.K. and went to mingle.
I saw my longtime crush Pagosu, also a Seed.
He was leaning against the wall.
I decided to ask him to dance.
But first, I had to get my nerve up.
When I had, I walked over to him, slightly swaying my hips.
He looked at me, and asked what I wanted.
I asked him to dance, stuttering.
He laughed at me.
His new girlfriend sashayed over.
They walked off.
All around me couples laughed and kissed and danced.
I saw Rinoa and Squall dancing.
Zell and Jess, the library girl, were holding hands.
Fuujin and Seifer were kissing.
Irvine and Selphie were horsing around.
It wasn't fair.
I heard someone laughing.
I turned and saw Pagosu and his friends pointing at me.
They were laughing, laughing at me.
Suddenly, all I could think about were all the couples.
I knew I couldn't talk without crying.
The walls felt like they were closing in.
I had to get out.
Everyone had someone else.
Cid and Edea.
Squall and Rinoa.
Zell and Jess.
Irvine and Selphie.
Seifer and Fuujin.
Pagosu and Whoever.
Everyone but myself.
I felt like crying, but I couldn't, not in public.
I started walking towards the huge doors.
I had to walk by Pagosu.
The song was ending.
Pagosu and friend's laughter was getting louder.
A new song came on.
I was walking faster.
I didn't see Pagosu stick out his foot.
I tripped and Pagosu "tried" to catch me.
He actually ripped open my new dress.
The music didn't even stop.
Noone stopped dancing.
Noone cared, cared that I was the subject of a vicious joke.
I got up and fled.
I was all out running now.
Pagosu's mocking laughs rang in my ears.
I shoved people out of my way.
Now they cared.
Now that I shoved them aside.
I saw the exit.
I tripped.
The fall tore the entire backside, from mid-back down, off.
I could hear people murmuring.
But above it all, I could hear Pagosu's shrill, mocking laughter.
I kept my eyes on the exit.
::Yes!:: I reached it.
I flung open then thick doors and escaped into the corridors.
On my way, I past Quistis and her date, Raajin.
She called to me, but I ignored her.
I was beyond help.
I reached my room.
I flung myself on my bed.
I wanted to cry but couldn't.
Couples raced through my head like a tornado.
Cid and Edea.
Squall and Rinoa.
Irvine and Selphie.
Quistis and Raajin.
Seifer and Fuujin.
Zell and Jess.
The tears came heavy and hard.
A wail tore from my throat.
"Why can't anyone love me?"
::Why can't anyone love me, Xu?::
The silence had no answer.
I cried.
Xu is my name.
And I left this world the next day.
Fooled ya! I know that some were thinking it was Quistis. I hated to do that to Xu. I didn't mess up on the formatting. I just thought that it would be more⦠more angsty and dramatic that way.
Disclaimer~I own Pagosu and the plot. Nothing else.
