Anguish
Tseng was miserable. He knew he shouldn't have been. His best friend had just admitted his feelings for another man. But that was the thing; it was another man. Not Tseng. His best friend was gay but did not return his companion's feelings of affection. Tseng doubted even if Sephiroth was aware of them.
He picked up his P.H.S. He had to take his mind off this. Maybe he should call his family. He hadn't spoken to them for weeks, let alone seen them. Them remembered; It was only in my last letter that I told them. Maybe they don't want to speak to me. No, it wont be that, Tseng reassured himself. Maybe they are just having a busy time at the shop.
Tseng's family ran a weapons shop in sector 7. They were not his blood family though. They were all killed in a fire when Tseng was just 18 months old. But he regarded this family as his own now, just the same. He visited them at Christmas and various other occasions and always told them what was happening with the Turks. Then Tseng realised something and felt a sudden cramp in his stomach. He could not remember them ever being particularly happy to see him, let alone ring him. I mustn't let this bother me. I'll ring anyway.
Just as the teen had finished dialling there was a knock at the door. "Enter". IT was Sephiroth. Tseng slammed the P.H.S. down before his friend had a chance to notice it, but the Turk did catch a faint "Hello" coming from the handset. It was lucky these Shinra phones automatically withhold their numbers.
"Hi Seph; what're you so happy about?" Tseng enquired to his friend.
The other teen did indeed have a smile on his face that seemed as though it could've reached Midgar.
"You know that guy I was telling you about? Well, you were right."
"I was? I mean, of course I was. What about?"
Sephiroth chuckled. It was obvious he was in a good mood. "He feels the same way!"
"He does? Good for you!" Tseng felt his heart in his boots. "Let's hear all about it."
* * *
Later that night, after Sephiroth had left, Tseng went to talk to Reeve.
Reeve, a young Shinra executive working in city development, was Tseng's only friend aside for Sephiroth. He was about six years older than him but they were firm, friends none the less. Whenever Tseng needed advice he would turn to Reeve. He was the kind of person you could spill your heart to easily. He was Tseng's confidant. His counsellor. But above all, His friend.
"Are you gonna stand out there all day? Come in, sit down."
Tseng had reached Reeve's fourteenth floor office so quickly and smoothly, almost mindlessly, that his thoughts had had a chance to wander.
"Oh, hi. Sorry. I have a lot on my mind." The two men entered the room and took seats across the desk, which was, as always, a complete tip of papers, files and folders.
"Excuse the mess" Reeve chuckled as those words left his lips. He knew, as much as Tseng, that if this desk were ever clear it would be a minor miracle.
"So, what's bothering you?" The exec asked his young friend.
Tseng took a deep breath and launched himself into a detailed explanation. He, however, did manage to conveniently forget to mention any names.
Tseng had mentioned his feelings for Sephiroth before, but of course had never actually said who it was. He had explained to Reeve about on a couple of occasions but never in any depth; as he was now.
* * *
"Who is this then, anyone I know?" Reeve had been listening in rapt attention but now broke his silence to enquire into this problematic subject.
"Oh, no, just someone I see from Kalm sometimes." Tseng lied as always trying to cover up for himself.
"Really? I have some family there. They might know him"
This sentence made Tseng quiver with anticipation and anxiety. He couldn't let Reeve find out. I cant even trust him with a secret this big. "I doubt it. He generally keeps himself to himself. Only has a couple of friends, you know, the strong silent type." This wasn't technically a lie but he had to change the subject. "So, go any advice for me?"
"Umm, no. Well apart from 'true love will prevail' and all that crap"
Tseng knew that these words meant nothing but still, Reeve felt this would all work out in the end and everything would be alright. He also knew he shouldn't take it to harshly if it didn't. He managed a week smile.
Reeve sighed. "That's a relief." I was half expecting you to take that the wrong way."
"No, its ok. I always try to look on the right side of things." This was partly true. Being a Turk Tseng was not allowed to show any emotion while working. This was good practice. "I had better be off. I go on duty in 10 minutes"
"Okay, Cya." The executive stood up and accompanied Tseng to the door. "Come back if you need any more help, or even just want a chat. You know my door is always open for my friends."
"Right, great, thanks. Bye then."
"Bye"
Tseng ran to his room as fast as he could. He did not have to work for another four hours. But still he had to get out of that office. He did not want to., no he could not cry in front of another, fully grown man.
* * *
Maybe it would be better if I ended it all know. If I just got my razor. Tseng was hysterical; but deep inside he knew he did not have the courage to take his own life. He drew a deep breath and looked at himself in the mirror. Gods, I look terrible. And this time I do go on duty in 10 minutes. Tseng splashed his face with cold water and then dressed. That cursed blue suit. That damned tie. And most of all that god-forsaken unemotional veil that he was forced to don.
When he arrived in the training centre something seemed different. The whole atmosphere has 0changed. No longer was it a dark, gloomy house of killing, but there was something in the air that made it, almost .joyous.
Then he realised. Vincent was singing! Vincent of all people. Turks weren't supposed to show emotion at the best of times, and Vincent, well, Vincent wasn't really the sort of person that would go around singing.
Tseng stood transfixed, staring at Vincent. Vincent however did not notice this until he had finished his third (that Tseng had heard) song; "Once upon a dream".
"Hello child. Today's lesson will be about combat movement. This is an art form. You must concentrate and practice that you might lull your enemy into a semi-hypnotic trace".
This was a side of Vincent Tseng had never seen. He like it all the same though. On top of it all Tseng had a good feeling about today's tutorial.
And it was right too. The lesson went without a hitch and he greatly enjoyed it. Vincent had even said that Tseng was a natural. This gave him the much needed morale boost. He no longer felt suicidal but in fact quite the opposite. This good feeling seemed to be contagious. First Sephiroth, then Vincent, and now him. What was it about this week?
* * *
Tseng go up the next day with the same exultant feeling as the night before. This was going to be a good day. He fumbles around in his room searching for clothes. He did not have to work that day so he had a lot of free time on his hands.
1
2 I think I'll go see Sephiroth. He hasn't been round recently. I hope he's ok. With the day's plans resolved in his mind the young Turk set out to find his Silver-haired friend.
3
4 As always, Tseng tried the courtyard first. Sephiroth often liked to site there, watching the water of the fountain trickle over the rocks and rejoin the pool of water around the whole enclosure. But not today.
5
6 Tseng drew himself away from the water feature and crossed the yard to the SOLDIER building. He started the trek up the stairs to Sephiroth's quarters.
When Tseng finally reached his companion's room he could just make out faint noises coming from inside, so he knocked on the door lightly. No answer. He tried again, making contact with the wooden panel marginally harder than before. Still nothing. After four attempts at knocking; each progressively more pronounced and definite than the last; he decided to just go in anyway. Which he did.
When Tseng stepped in the room it was immediately obvious why the door had gone unanswered. There, on the couch, only half clothed, were Sephiroth and Vincent. Kissing.
Tseng ran.
~:Owari:~
Tseng was miserable. He knew he shouldn't have been. His best friend had just admitted his feelings for another man. But that was the thing; it was another man. Not Tseng. His best friend was gay but did not return his companion's feelings of affection. Tseng doubted even if Sephiroth was aware of them.
He picked up his P.H.S. He had to take his mind off this. Maybe he should call his family. He hadn't spoken to them for weeks, let alone seen them. Them remembered; It was only in my last letter that I told them. Maybe they don't want to speak to me. No, it wont be that, Tseng reassured himself. Maybe they are just having a busy time at the shop.
Tseng's family ran a weapons shop in sector 7. They were not his blood family though. They were all killed in a fire when Tseng was just 18 months old. But he regarded this family as his own now, just the same. He visited them at Christmas and various other occasions and always told them what was happening with the Turks. Then Tseng realised something and felt a sudden cramp in his stomach. He could not remember them ever being particularly happy to see him, let alone ring him. I mustn't let this bother me. I'll ring anyway.
Just as the teen had finished dialling there was a knock at the door. "Enter". IT was Sephiroth. Tseng slammed the P.H.S. down before his friend had a chance to notice it, but the Turk did catch a faint "Hello" coming from the handset. It was lucky these Shinra phones automatically withhold their numbers.
"Hi Seph; what're you so happy about?" Tseng enquired to his friend.
The other teen did indeed have a smile on his face that seemed as though it could've reached Midgar.
"You know that guy I was telling you about? Well, you were right."
"I was? I mean, of course I was. What about?"
Sephiroth chuckled. It was obvious he was in a good mood. "He feels the same way!"
"He does? Good for you!" Tseng felt his heart in his boots. "Let's hear all about it."
* * *
Later that night, after Sephiroth had left, Tseng went to talk to Reeve.
Reeve, a young Shinra executive working in city development, was Tseng's only friend aside for Sephiroth. He was about six years older than him but they were firm, friends none the less. Whenever Tseng needed advice he would turn to Reeve. He was the kind of person you could spill your heart to easily. He was Tseng's confidant. His counsellor. But above all, His friend.
"Are you gonna stand out there all day? Come in, sit down."
Tseng had reached Reeve's fourteenth floor office so quickly and smoothly, almost mindlessly, that his thoughts had had a chance to wander.
"Oh, hi. Sorry. I have a lot on my mind." The two men entered the room and took seats across the desk, which was, as always, a complete tip of papers, files and folders.
"Excuse the mess" Reeve chuckled as those words left his lips. He knew, as much as Tseng, that if this desk were ever clear it would be a minor miracle.
"So, what's bothering you?" The exec asked his young friend.
Tseng took a deep breath and launched himself into a detailed explanation. He, however, did manage to conveniently forget to mention any names.
Tseng had mentioned his feelings for Sephiroth before, but of course had never actually said who it was. He had explained to Reeve about on a couple of occasions but never in any depth; as he was now.
* * *
"Who is this then, anyone I know?" Reeve had been listening in rapt attention but now broke his silence to enquire into this problematic subject.
"Oh, no, just someone I see from Kalm sometimes." Tseng lied as always trying to cover up for himself.
"Really? I have some family there. They might know him"
This sentence made Tseng quiver with anticipation and anxiety. He couldn't let Reeve find out. I cant even trust him with a secret this big. "I doubt it. He generally keeps himself to himself. Only has a couple of friends, you know, the strong silent type." This wasn't technically a lie but he had to change the subject. "So, go any advice for me?"
"Umm, no. Well apart from 'true love will prevail' and all that crap"
Tseng knew that these words meant nothing but still, Reeve felt this would all work out in the end and everything would be alright. He also knew he shouldn't take it to harshly if it didn't. He managed a week smile.
Reeve sighed. "That's a relief." I was half expecting you to take that the wrong way."
"No, its ok. I always try to look on the right side of things." This was partly true. Being a Turk Tseng was not allowed to show any emotion while working. This was good practice. "I had better be off. I go on duty in 10 minutes"
"Okay, Cya." The executive stood up and accompanied Tseng to the door. "Come back if you need any more help, or even just want a chat. You know my door is always open for my friends."
"Right, great, thanks. Bye then."
"Bye"
Tseng ran to his room as fast as he could. He did not have to work for another four hours. But still he had to get out of that office. He did not want to., no he could not cry in front of another, fully grown man.
* * *
Maybe it would be better if I ended it all know. If I just got my razor. Tseng was hysterical; but deep inside he knew he did not have the courage to take his own life. He drew a deep breath and looked at himself in the mirror. Gods, I look terrible. And this time I do go on duty in 10 minutes. Tseng splashed his face with cold water and then dressed. That cursed blue suit. That damned tie. And most of all that god-forsaken unemotional veil that he was forced to don.
When he arrived in the training centre something seemed different. The whole atmosphere has 0changed. No longer was it a dark, gloomy house of killing, but there was something in the air that made it, almost .joyous.
Then he realised. Vincent was singing! Vincent of all people. Turks weren't supposed to show emotion at the best of times, and Vincent, well, Vincent wasn't really the sort of person that would go around singing.
Tseng stood transfixed, staring at Vincent. Vincent however did not notice this until he had finished his third (that Tseng had heard) song; "Once upon a dream".
"Hello child. Today's lesson will be about combat movement. This is an art form. You must concentrate and practice that you might lull your enemy into a semi-hypnotic trace".
This was a side of Vincent Tseng had never seen. He like it all the same though. On top of it all Tseng had a good feeling about today's tutorial.
And it was right too. The lesson went without a hitch and he greatly enjoyed it. Vincent had even said that Tseng was a natural. This gave him the much needed morale boost. He no longer felt suicidal but in fact quite the opposite. This good feeling seemed to be contagious. First Sephiroth, then Vincent, and now him. What was it about this week?
* * *
Tseng go up the next day with the same exultant feeling as the night before. This was going to be a good day. He fumbles around in his room searching for clothes. He did not have to work that day so he had a lot of free time on his hands.
1
2 I think I'll go see Sephiroth. He hasn't been round recently. I hope he's ok. With the day's plans resolved in his mind the young Turk set out to find his Silver-haired friend.
3
4 As always, Tseng tried the courtyard first. Sephiroth often liked to site there, watching the water of the fountain trickle over the rocks and rejoin the pool of water around the whole enclosure. But not today.
5
6 Tseng drew himself away from the water feature and crossed the yard to the SOLDIER building. He started the trek up the stairs to Sephiroth's quarters.
When Tseng finally reached his companion's room he could just make out faint noises coming from inside, so he knocked on the door lightly. No answer. He tried again, making contact with the wooden panel marginally harder than before. Still nothing. After four attempts at knocking; each progressively more pronounced and definite than the last; he decided to just go in anyway. Which he did.
When Tseng stepped in the room it was immediately obvious why the door had gone unanswered. There, on the couch, only half clothed, were Sephiroth and Vincent. Kissing.
Tseng ran.
~:Owari:~
