Author: Jane

Disclaimer: if I owned Roswell why god why would I write a fic, and not an eppy??? Oh, and if you want to sew me, good luck. I'm brokeL

Distribution: if you want it take it, just tell me where it is.

Email: sixstring_queen@hotmail.com

Thanks: umm, other than my friends…. Jason and Brendan, because there are SOOOO hot!!

Authors Note: this takes place shortly after graduation. All the couples are the same but Michael and Maria broke up. I was inspired to write this after I read a book called Smack, it is the best book I've ever read and I couldn't help but combine it with Roswell a little. This story will deal with various kinds of serious addictions, and self-mutilation. If you don't want to read about that then this story's not for you…oh! And maybe abortions…I'm really not sure.

I'm Not An Addict

Life is a ride. There's no doubting that, it's fast and dangerous and if you don't hold on you could get trampled by it…or worse, miss it. Life is meant to be taken for all that it's wroth and than thrown away, only to be used again. But people are stupid and they usually can't see that. All they see is what's in front of them; pay the bills, go to work, pick Billy up from school… I don't know what I'm saying and the last thing I'd ask you to do is try to understand it… I guess what I mean is: life is horrible and wonderful, happy and sad…and so beautiful, but no one can see it for what it is…

"Michael! C'mon. If you take one more minute I'm going!"  Max yelled to his friend.  Michael ran out of Mail Box Express, and got into Max's old convertible. With in the second he got in the car they were off with a screech.

 After a while of uncomfortable silence Max finally said, "I hope you don't think you can get her back. She's like you, too damn stubborn." Max took his eyes off the road and looked Michael in the eye, but he was looking straight ahead of him at the highway.

"I don't want her back, I just wanted her to know that." He said with no emotion.

"You're a stupid man Michael, you're a stupid man." Max said as Michael and him zoomed passed the 'Welcome to Roswell' sign with the all too charming green alien on it.

********************3 weeks later

"No, no, no. I didn't…I mean…that can't be right!" Maria Deluca pleaded with her doctor. Maria was sitting in a check-up room in the Roswell hospital. She had been really sick for the past couple of days and thought she was coming down with something, but not this.

"Well the test did turn out green and not blue-"

"Green?! The test came out green??!!" she put her head in her hands and closed her eye's. She just graduated high school she couldn't be pregnant! She had her whole life to plan out before she had a baby! What was she going to tell her mother? What was she going to tell her friends? Oh god! What was she going to tell Michael? They weren't even together anymore. Michael had made it very clear that they were over-

"Miss. Deluca are you alright…..? We could do an ultra sound just to be sure, if you'd like?" Doctor Herber put a comforting hand on her shoulder.

 "Yeah, okay…. I mean could we even see anything yet?" her voice was shaking and she was fighting to keep control.

"Well, no at the most your only about …two, three weeks along. But we could still hear a heart beat…why don't you lay back and pull you shirt up."  The doctor said as he set up the machine. He put some kind of clear jelly on her bare stomach and then started to roll some tool on her. She held her breath waiting to hear something…anything, but just when she thought nothing would come and there was nothing to worry about there it was. A muffled little 'thump, thump, thump', it was so quite she almost couldn't hear it. Oh my god, she though, there's someone growing inside me… All of a sudden it felt like it was going to be okay, all of it, her mom, school…maybe even Michael, 'cause how could something so small be bad?

*******************

"Max? Is that you?" Liz asked in a very tried voice. She looked over to her clock in her room and it read 2:00 o'clock in the morning.

"Yeah. look I'm sorry I'm calling so late…but I'm in trouble." Max said.

"Max, you lied to me, you hurt me, and then you left me.  I don't really give a shit. Don't call, oh and-"

Max cut her off. "Liz its Michael. He left…back to Roswell, well I don't know where he left to but…he's in trouble."

"What kind of trouble?" Liz asked.

"Do you even know why Maria and him broke up? Max asked Liz.

"He's an alien ass who couldn't commit, reminds you of someone doesn't it? She asked sarcastically. She couldn't believe he was calling. Three weeks ago he up and left with Michael and never looked back. After all she had done for, after all she was willing to give up, he just left! They all graduated high school, about two weeks before Max and Michael left and Liz knew that they were going to go there separate ways but no like that.  There was no good-bye scene…there was no good bye. Liz had to find out what was going on by a note that Michael had left Maria. Maria and Maria.

"No Liz, he got into some trouble senior year…he, started doing heroin." He said with shame in his voice.

"What…?" She just let her voice trail off, as she tried so comprehend what she just heard. Looking back it made since, Michael was always spaced out toward the end of the year. It explained a lot really…why they broke up, why Maria wouldn't give up any detail's to why they broke up…

"Look I don't have time for this I'm about a half hour away from Roswell, get everyone together at Isabel's…I'll tell you more then." Liz was shocked at how desperate he sounded. How could Michael even shoot up, if Max couldn't handle a swig of whiskey then how could Michael be a junkie? None of this makes any sense, Liz thought.

More to come!!!J