A/N: Hey everyone!! Alright, here's chapter 2! I know another one where Lucas cries, but I made it kind of morbid…and if you think about it, if you finally let go of something that painful, you'd be cryin' a lot too! Anyways! I worked really hard on this after an ETERNITY of writers block. SO please review! Thank you all for the wonderful comments! You guys are awesome! ~Rena

Ben sat silently next to Lucas' bed in the med-bay. White sheets were pulled up to the kid's chin, covering his bandaged ribs. His hair fell softly into his closed eyes and his breathing was even and slow. Ben watched his chest rise and fall, awe-struck. He didn't understand how anybody cold survive such pain; he's have gone into a deep depression by now.

But not Lucas, he wouldn't burden anyone with his problems, let his feelings show. Ben sighed heavily, remembering the "crew meeting" that had happened half an hour before. There hadn't been a dry eye anywhere once Bridger was finished telling the crew about Lucas' breakdown.

"No…" a small voice broke through his thoughts. He looked once again to his young friend, who's face was now scrunched up in pain and his head thrashed about wildly.

"Lucas…C'mon kid, wake up!" Ben grabbed his hand, shaking his, trying to rouse him from his nightmare.

"NO!" Lucas shot straight up in bed, breathing heavily. His face was soaked with sweat, his eyes showing complete and total terror.

"Hey, it's all right luke, calm down," he gently pushed the kids chest, forcing him back down onto the bed, slowly stroking his hair back.

"Are you all right?" Ben asked, concerned.

"I'm fine." Lucas' reply was curt, sounded angry. He was looking at the ceiling, his 'mask' securely in place, all emotion hidden. Ben was confused by his anger, to say the least.

"Luke…what's wrong kid?"

"Nothing. I'm fine," he closed his eyes, trying not to cry as the memories from the nightmare filled his mind.

Ben asked again, "C'mon, tell me what's wrong."

Lucas blew up, "Goddammit Ben! I'm fine! What do you want me to so to prove that? What do you want me say? That I'm going into depression, that I need help? Jesus Christ! Why do you care anyway? I've lived with you for over a year and you were either clueless or didn't give a flying fuck," he smirked, "of course, I don't expect you to give a flying fuck about anyone, Lieutenant."

"Lucas Wolenczak!" Nathan stormed in, none too happy. He's never heard anything like that

come from Lucas. He was fixing to say more when he saw the Lieutenant.

Ben's mouth was in a straight line, his eyes reflecting the hirt. Lucas' words had hurt him more than anything, he'd only wanted to help his friend. How could he have known that Lawrence was doing that to Lucas?! It wasn't his fault! He met the captains eyes, and then got up and quickly left the room.

Now it was Bridger's turn.

"why did you do that? Ben hasn't left your side since you got here," he started softly, "I've never heard you talk like that before. I know your fifteen, but Lucas…"

"Can I go?" Lucas' voice was sad. He couldn't believe he'd said that to his friend. He had seen the look of pain in Ben's eyes, and knew he was the one who put it there.

"Not yet, I want to talk to you."

"So talk."

Bridger didn't like this side of Lucas, this hostile, angry teenager.

"Don't be upset Lucas, we want to help. You've been hurt so badly, we just want to help you."

"Captain, I told you so you'd leave me alone, it was meant as an explanation, not an invitation for pity," Lucas said coldly. He hated acting like this, he felt awful. He would apologize to Ben, and then cry his eyes out, but he just couldn't show that kind of emotion again. He couldn't trust so easily, they would use it against him, he just knew it!

Brider had guessed as much, he knew Lucas better than the kid thought he did, and knew he was trying hard to hold it together. But he had to get Lucas to open up, even just a little, let it out, learn to trust. He knew that the first time he'd cried in years had been only hours before, and he knew there was much more hurt to cry out.

"Lucas, Dr. Westphalen and I were looking through your medical records…" Bridger said quietly. He watched as Lucas' eyes widened, and hurt crossed his face for a moment.

"And we came upon a file from your fourteenth birthday."

Lucas closed his eyes, angry and saddened by the memory.

"Did he really…" Lucas cut him off.

"Yes."

Nathan closed his eyes, so angry at Lucas' parents. His father was a well-respected man, and nathan had now lost all of that respect towards him.

"Did they really what?" Ben asked, walking back into the room. He's never really left, couldn't bring himself to leave the kid.

"They stabbed me…" Lucas whispered, a strained murmer.

Ben stopped walking. He looked frantically at the captain, his eyes begging to be told differently. It couldn't be the truth, nobody was that cruel. The captain just looked at him sadly and shook his head.

"They…they stabbed you?" Ben asked disbelieving.

Lucas was trembling, "With a steak knife…on my birthday. I'd finally confronted my…father…about the beatings. I threatened to tell somebody. He was trying to kill me. He wasn't drunk either. I always thought that he couldn't control it, because of the drinking, but that night…he really does hate me."

"Lucas…" Bridger said softly.

"The knife…so close to my throat…God…my hands!" Lucas' eyes were squeezed shut.

Bridger was confused, what had happened to Lucas' hands? He knew he's been stabbed in the stomach, barely escaping with his life, but he didn't remember anything about his hands. Unless…, "Laceration's on palm and back of both hands, severed bone," Bridger repeated from the file. Ben looked confused. Lucas eyes were still shut, his face a grimace of pain, looking as if he was about to break. And Bridger sat with a very sad, very concerned look on his face.

Lucas opened his eyes, looking at his hands. Faint scars, long and white, but faint, were on the palms and backs of his hands.

Ben finally realized what they were talking about. He watched Lucas choke back a sob. He was shaking so badly, his eyes looking frantic, filled with pain. More pain than Ben had ever seen.

Bridger noticed this too, his heart breaking again. It was the second time he's watched this boy, this fragile little boy, shatter in front of him.

"No," Lucas whispered, "I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine. I can't cry…boys don't cry." He curled into himself, pulling his knees to his chest and laying on his side.

Ben and Bridger looked at each other, then back at the trembling teen. Lucas looked bak at them with with pained sapphire eyes.

"I want…I want it to stop hurting. And it never will!" Lucas let a tear roll down his face. His pain almost palpable.

"Lucas…" Bridger sat on his bed, picking Lucas gently up into a sitting position, gently wrapping an arm around the boys shaking shoulders. But Lucas stayed stidd, not taking the comfort. Ben sat down on the other side, gently smoothing Lucas' hair back.

"You can let go Luke, you're safe now bud. You can trust us." Ben said softly.

"No! Everybody I trust betrays me! Asking for trust is asking for betrayl!" Lucas tears ran unbidden down his cheeks. He tried, tried so hard to hold back his sobs. The two officers didn't know what to say. And within the awkward silence, Lucas finally fell free.

He collapsed heavily against Bridger, letting out a choked sob as he hid his face in Nathan's shoulder.

"Please…just make it stop hurting! I…I can't take much more!" he could talk no more after that. His entire body shook with sobs. His heart hurt so bad, the turmoil he was in.

Bridger held him again, a small ball of misery. He ran his fingers through the blonde hair and spoke any words he could think of to comfort him.

Ben watched, his heart breaking over again at the site. Lucas was such an awesome kid, how could somebody hurt him so badly?

He cried for a long time, letting his agony take over his mind. His best friend and his captain crying with him.

Ending Note: That was short I know! I'm sorry! I just have to type up the next chapter (wrote it during class) thank you all again!! Please review!