Author: Ellie Lildat
Disclaimer: Not mine
Summery: And with that glance I saw my future, the future that exists for the love I have, the only love I had. And at once I knew, never could I look into a pair of ice and see what I saw in the pair of chocolate. For I died in that glance.
Rating: heavy R
AN: Trying something I don't usually do for fics, hoping it works. My sarcasm won't be part of this tale. Personally and honestly, I'm scaring myself and don't like this.

Title: Death Poet

All good things must come to an end. They say, but what we had was beyond the limits of good and bad.

The touch still haunts my skin, your cool and sturdy feather touch that stole my heart in an act of passion. It's been years, but the bruises still exist. The ache in my limbs that comes when you're near and far, always calling for you but never answered. It's always there. Even the others can see the marks you left on me, body and soul... between my legs, around my heart, on my lips... they all belong to you.

Heroes, they called us; Warriors, they said; Saviors, they insisted. But we were not. I, but a child and you, much more than a man; we were lovers and nothing more. Lovers first and lovers last, like it was in our hearts and it was when we died. Lovers and nothing less.

My innocence was lost for you, my love. In the humid air of an old basement apartment, the background music of nature's tears as you penetrated me, loved me. Our shields were held down for once, stripping our armor and tasting our skin as two became one.

I don't remember the pain, though... it might had been there when you thrusted into me, but I just remember the darks of your eyes as we softly gazed into each other's souls... cleansing during what others consider a violation. And with that glance I saw my future, the future that exists for the love I have, the only love I had. And at once I knew, never could I look into a pair of ice and see what I saw in the pair of chocolate. For I died in that glance.

Our minds have shadows of the times after we died, the scars we caused and wounds we bled. But it didn't happen. We left, beloved, that night we united and let our minds and bodies run their courses without our pain. We left in tears, first of love and then, when we had to fight to stay, of pain. They pulled us back, my love, ripping and tearing for us to return to a place that wasn't our world. We were beaten and stabbed into existing again, only to be separated.

I sent you away, with a stab to the stomach that I felt just as much. A stab that could never begin to show my love for you... and so I fled to die again, and join you once more.

Pawns, we called ourselves after abuse and violation. Pawns in their game that didn't want to play. But we were wrong, for pawns don't play the way we play. A game that started out theirs and ended up our own, a game that should never be played.

Our night, the night that we don't speak of but think of often, I remember in a whirl of emotion and vivid details that should never be vivid to begin with. A night where softness and fierceness melded together, where worn souls laughed like children, where we left spirits when we left. Our night was never to have existed, a night that will never be matched it was. Our love destroyed the world, destroyed me, destroyed you... it all leads back to us, my darling.

Because our love is like none that should ever exist, and our punishment for that love is not nearly over... there is more to destroy than ourselves....

*****

Pet, are you okay? The accented voice asked sweetly, drawing her out of the deepest of her thoughts, the ones she never spoke of.
She answered, turning to stare emptily into the pure blue eyes of the one that held her.

And with that glance I saw my future, the future that exists for the love I have, the only love I had. And at once I knew, never could I look into a pair of ice and see what I saw in the pair of chocolate. For I died in that glance.

The End.