Disclaimer: hehehehehe
Author's Note: Oie, I think it's about time to rap this one up. My original plan was to make this a simple one parter; but then things got switched, I changed the plot, yadda yadda yadda. Point is, I don't want to be tied down to one plot for very long. Some authors can handle it, but I'm not there yet. Hence, I'll probably tie everything up in one more chapter. But let it be said, I really, really appreciate all you guys for reading, and 'specially those that took the time to review. Thanks!
Chapter Seven: Of Just Three Words and Unrequited Love
"Now Trunks I know. I know. Trunks, I-"
*Love you. Forgive you. Like you. Adore you. Want you.* Trunks thought wildly, listing all of the possibilities that would be pleasing for him to hear.
"Trunks, I..." *Say it Pan. Say it.*
*...Pan?*
"I..." She swallowed and pushed away from him. "I have to get back to the kitchen." The ending notes of a cello rang through the air - the drawn out conclusion to sad a love song - and Trunks watched it all end for him too. She, once again, was running away from him. He watched her duck back into the kitchen, the warmth of her body still present where he had held her while they danced. He could still feel the silky material of her black dress she had on. Still could sense the perfume she wore. Had the impression of the feather light hair that brushed his neck when she talked, and the sway of her red scarf when he stopped to twirl her. But she was gone.
*That's the same dress she wore when I ran into her after talking with Bra...* Trunks thought with bitter irony. *I pushed her away that day too. Dende, why do you hate me?*
***
Pan carefully placed the coffee on the table with a smile. "Is that everything?"
"Yes, thank you." The man replied. He glanced up at Pan for a moment before speaking again. "Are you new here? I've been here everyday for a coffee after work, but I've never seen you before." He explained. Pan continued to smile, all to willing to share the news with a regular customer.
"I'm filling in for my friend and uncle while they're at the hospital. They own this place." Pan told him.
"Dear heavens, what happened?" He asked, general concern in his voice.
"What happened?" Pan asked with a tilt of her head, confused. "Oh, wait, nothing bad. Marron's having her baby." Pan said, her smile returning.
"Oh, that's great."
"Uh huh, I'd better get back to work. Nice talking to you."
"Indeed." He murmured, picking up his cup and turning to the newspaper he had with him. Pan walked back into the kitchen to make sure the rice and fish were doing alright. To her delight they were simmering perfectly. Pan had never really done this sort of work before, and it was a nice break from writing novels and actually was sort of fun. Although she may be reluctant to say it out loud, Pan was having a good time, despite the fact that she had to spend the day with Trunks and continually had teenage guys hit on her.
Pulling a strand of hair back, she looked dup at the kitchen clock. Quarter after seven.
"What?! Quarter past seven?! I'm going to be late!" Pan screeched aloud. She ran to the telephone desk and found a pen as well as a notepad and began to scribble like mad. Hearing her holler, Trunks ran into the kitchen. His face held the look of concern, and he was wildly looking around the room.
"Pan? What is it? Did you get burned? What?" Pan looked up from her scribbling to see Trunks leaning in the hallway. His lavender hair was now slightly misplaced with the front bangs messily falling over his eyes. Pan loved it when it did that; it made him look more sexy and vulnerable at the same time.
"Oh, no. I uh- oh yeah, I have to go to an author's convention dance-thingy and I have to leave now." She returned to writing on the notepad, and could hear Trunks sigh. He ran a hand through his hair and had the look of 'is that all?' that most parents learn to make.
"What are you writing?" He asked, finally noticing her penmanship.
"Instructions on the food." Pan replied, finishing them off. "I think you should be able to handle it." She said with a smirk before shoving the paper into his hand. She straightened her dress and turned to walk away.
"Pan...?" Trunks began, the paper clenched in his hands, his face determined and pleading. *Stay here. Come on Pan, don't push me away. I need you....* Pan looked at him expectantly, but Trunks remained silent. *Tell her. She's not psychic, you have to tell her.* "Pan... stay here." Pan continued her stare, emotionless, just waiting for Trunks to back up his request. "I mean, how important is one convention?"
"Not extremely." Pan said truthfully. Trunks smiled,
"Then you'll stay?"
"Trunks, I helped you out, I can't cook for you the entire night." What? Cook?
"Pan, I meant to stay here with... me." Trunks said, his voice losing its nerve by the second. Pan found her fingers interlocking with themselves, fidgeting while Trunks spoke. "I mean, you're not going to know anyone there, are you? Won't it be kind of boring?"
"Zach will be there." Pan said, almost regrettably. At that sentence, Trunks' face fell, he shoved his hands into his pockets - he had given up.
"Well, then I guess you better go." Trunks said, turning his back on her and pretended to be reading her food instructions.
*No, Trunks! Don't give up! ... Maybe he really does want me to go. I'm not sure - oh Trunks. Just say those words. Say the words so I'll know. I'll be yours forever.* "Just three words."
"See ya, Pan." Trunks murmured, strain in his voice.
*Not those three. Trunks you jerk.* Pan nodded and walked out of the kitchen. "Good night, Trunks." Sadly pulling her purse onto her shoulder, she trudged out into the night air.
***
"Pan, you can do this." She muttered to her reflection. Her hands gripped the counter in the washroom hard, and she could feel her knuckles tensing and becoming white. She closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths in attempt to calm herself. She leaned over and ran her hands under some cold water to try and get her brain back in function.
"What is my problem?" She asked herself desperately. "Can't I even keep one of my guys?" She asked, really to know one, not even herself anymore. "Trunks... why didn't you stop me? It would have been so easy. I just needed you to fight. Fight for me. I'm not strong enough to fight all alone. You said you'd always protect me. You lied - you're not here to protect me from... myself." Pan hastily dried off her hands and brushed a strand of ebony hair back in place. She had pulled it back with two dragonfly clips to keep it out of her way, but they didn't seem to be doing there job at the moment.
By the sink lay the symbol of all of her prison and her escape. The engagement ring. Putting it on would mean her defeat and she would forever be left in the dark of things that could have been. A clear road that held so many beautiful futures would be lost to her forever - but of coarse they were already blocked off by Trunks. He didn't want her. The words still held venom, and she doubted they would ever stop stabbing at her heart. It also held her freedom. The escape from her eternal turmoil of choice and regret. She could belong to someone - have meaning. Never have to worry about the man that 'didn't want her anymore'. But... it would be running again. Always running.
Pan slipped the ring on her finger.
***
"It's so beautiful..." Goten murmured, holding his finger to the infants so it could grab it. "She." Marron corrected tiredly. Goten looked up from the bundle he held securely in his arms over to his wife. Her blonde hair was limp and framed her face, while her body also reflected a sense of lifelessness. He walked from the window over to his wife, but not before gently placing his new-born daughter into the arms of the nurse at the doorway.
"There's a group of people in the lobby." Goten said quietly. "Could you please-"
"Show them the baby?" The nurse asked with a tilt of the head and an understanding smile. "I'd love to. What's the name?"
"Hasn't got one yet. But it's a Son. Newest addition to the Son family." The nurse nodded twice, and slipped out towards the lobby, uttering soft words to the baby. "I love you." Goten murmured, pulling Marron to him.
"Mmm." She murmured, not being able to, but not needing to say anything more. He moved her slightly and then crawled into the bed himself before letting her tired body lean against his own. He absentmindedly stroked the hair from her eyes with his fingers.
"I'm so proud of you." Goten said. Marron offered a last smile before falling into a comfortable sleep in her husband's arms; her child in those of her family, her close friend minding her store... and another friend about to make a huge mistake.
"Pan..." Marron mumbled before falling into her slumber. Goten hugged her tighter, looked out the window towards the darkening sky.
"Dende, thank you for my child, and Marron's safety... now please help my block-headed friend and my stubborn niece."
***
"Miss Son, a pleasure to meet you." The voice was snarled slightly and sounded as if he had swallowed a cactus before entering. Despite this, Pan politely shook the man's hand, recognizing him as an esteemed horror author. "You've taken the woman's world by storm, young lady. You've got spunk." Pan felt herself smiling at the over-weight man who had a champagne glass pulled up to his beard.
"Thank you." She answered modestly. "I'm afraid I've never read your work. Horror doesn't settle well with me." Pan told truthfully. Trunks had read her a horror when she was six while he was baby-sitting her, giving her horrible nightmares. She couldn't pick up that genre since.
"Well, that makes two of us. I haven't read any of yours either. More of a lady's author you are, but your reputation is quickly developing."
"Is that so?" Pan asked, grinning. "I'm glad."
"Yes. Now, forgive me, but is that not a ring on your finger there? Is Miss. Son soon to become a Mrs?"
"One could only hope." A new voice said, joining the conversation. Pan and the man turned to see Zachary standing with two glasses, one which he handed to Pan. She took it with a nod. "I must say Pan, that dress looks gorgeous."
"Thank-you." She murmured, glancing down at her trailing red dress. *Trunks would have said that dress is gorgeous on you.* Pan brushed the thought away, concentrating on the conversation. *I'm leaving Trunks behind. He doesn't want to keep up.*
"Oh, then you are the husband-to-be?" The author asked, turning to Zach.
"Not officially yet, no." He said with a wink.
"You're not with that president anymore?" He asked, his eyebrows raised, turning to Pan.
"Pardon me?" Pan said, nearly choking on the whine she had raised to her lips.
"It was all in the newspapers, you both being local celebrities. Never seen anyone so in love before. That's too bad. Forgive me, I shall see you again perhaps, Miss Son." He said with a movement to kiss her hand before going off to mingle with other authors gathered at the banquet.
*... anyone so in love? Pan, he would have gone after you. But - he did send me those gifts... No, he just wanted you to forgive him - he just wants to be friends. Pan - Zach will make you happy.*
~~He's sweet and I know he'll make me happy. Not overly jumping for joy, loving each day happy - but happy. The average married woman's type of happy."
"Since when do you settle for anything below the best?" Marron asked venomisly.~~
Pan stood, dumbly holding her crystal glass, standing in the middle of the dance floor - not dancing. She zapped out of her thoughts when a new song filtered through the ball room. It was her favourite song - the one that had been on that morning. The one Trunks had danced with her.
"Zachary, I love this song." Pan said to him, waiting for him to ask for a dance.
"It's too sad." Zach muttered taking a sip of his drink.
"Maybe, but I really like it." Pan said unfazed. Zach turned to her with an eyebrow raised.
"Okay, I got it. You like the song." The look in his eye sent Pan emotionless. He didn't seem to exactly care, but he didn't not care either.
"Aren't you going to dance with me?" She asked quietly. He softened his eyes, and took a step towards her. He leaned down to her ear with the intention of whispering in it.
"I don't think we should be seen that close until we're engaged officially. Obviously you wish to take that final step. Thank you Pan. You won't regret it." Zach said, stepping away from her ear and walking quickly to the center of the room towards the microphone, dragging Pan along with him.
*Wha-? No. NO!* Her mind's scream had little effect on her body as she willingly let Zach pull her towards the microphone where he would make their engagement known to everyone. *Please stop...* She wanted the words to enter her mouth, but her lips seemed dry. He was moving too fast. She couldn't get her mind and body to function in order. Her mind was thinking perfectly, but it was as if her body was in shock. It wouldn't do what she wanted it to.
She wanted to scream. She wanted to kick. Punch, bite, gnarl his eyes out - anything to keep him from moving... but why?
It was her last chance to turn back. Deep down, within the depths of her soul, Pan knew... she knew that she loved Trunks. It was there. But love isn't a one-sided deal. It has to be returned. Trunks can't love her anymore. He fought a tough fight, but in the end he gave up. He let her be carried out by the sea into its dangerous hands. But marriage was love. Not just second-rate happiness. She couldn't go through her life loving Trunks and being with Zach. It was one or the other. But giving up one for the risk of the other. It was a gamble. Pan never was good in the luck category.
Zach stepped up to the 'mike' and tapped don it lightly. "Excuse me? I'd like to share an announcement with you all." He said, his clear, confident voice ringing through the entire ball room. The music was quickly dumped down, making it easier for them to hear the words that would come out of the esteemed editor.
*This is it. You will give your heart away to 'happy enough'?* The entire crowd turned to look at the couple by the microphone. The man, standing tall with grace, and his date pale, looking thin in her red ball gown. Pan gazed through the crowd. Searching for a sign on what to do. Her eyes landed on the author she had met before. He looked somewhat sad at them. Almost as if he knew... as if he disapproved.
"I've never seen anyone so in love..."
*But Zach likes me, and I like him. It could work. In fact, I know it could.* With burning confidence, Pan stood up straight, finally knowing exactly what she was going to do. She knew where her life would be headed. She had hope for a future without anymore tears. And deep down, she knew it was the right choice too. This was her last chance to control her life, and she knew right where she was headed. With a burning smile, Pan turned to Zach who began to speak.
"Pan and I are..."
To be continued...
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