-
Weakness
Chapter 8: Donating My Body To Science
-
"I know how you look at the world...
everything can be explained by forms and charts and numbers...
If you can dissect it you can control it
if you can name it you can own it...
You want to diagram my heart
is it so that you will know how to take me apart?
if you want to know how I feel
You could never look me in the eye and ask me...-Heavens to Betsy, Donating My Body to Science
-
"Dib lay on his bed, meditatively rubbing his lips. ZIM had kissed him. Zim had KISSED him. Zim had kissed HIM. He couldn't get it out of his head.
The worst part was, it wasn't that bad. Pleasant, actually. He quirked his lips at the memory. His tongue hadn't felt human, but it wasn't necessarily a bad fell...just very smooth and dry. His teeth were shaped like zippers, and very sharp- his lip was still a little sore from a midkiss misestimation. His lips, his body was cold and reptilian. It was about what he expected.
"Mrgh." He stuffed his face into his mattress. Normally, he would be writing all of this out into his Zim journal. Notes, samples, Polaroid's if possible. But what was he going to do? Blot his lips on a napkin? Try and detail the shock that went through him when they had connected? It was pointless, and he knew it.
Instead, he reached over and turned on his stereo. Not having any particular CD he wanted to listen to, he figured the radio would work. When in doubt, loud music is good therapy.
"He tastes like candy, he's so beautiful..."
He growled and flipped the station.
"Why dont you just-KISS MEEE! Its just a kiss, its just a ki-iss!"
He made a pained, whiny noise and flipped it again.
"I wanna be your boyfriend, yeah! I wanna be your-"
*CLICK*
No more radio tonight.
Boyfriend however...this hadn't occurred to him. Was Zim merely experimenting, or had that kiss meant something he didn't want to think about? Zim said that he had no interest in the opposite sex, and yet he had gone through those hormonal changes...it was reasonable to assume he was attracted to SOMETHING. But what?
-
"Master! Master! Play tag with me!"
"No, GIR." Zim lay on his couch in silent repose.
"But maaaaaster..." the little robot whined. "Youve been sitting there since the stink human left! Im bored, and Piggy is hungry!"
"Why don't you and Piggy go get some of those disgusting tacos you seem to enjoy so thoroughly? There is money under the rug."
"TACOOOOOOS!" GIR scampered off clutching his tiny rubber friend, leaving Zim to think. It had been about an hour since the incident, and yet he could not get it out of his mind.
The human mouth...at first glance, so repulsive and wet, was actually a commodious chamber for his tongue. Dib's tongue, oddly shaped, flat and slimy...he wanted to compare it to a graden slug, but something in him held it back. What? Why should he be defending Dib in his head NOW, of all times, with his final ploy ready to spring?
It was true that he had been feeling strangely ever since the accident. HE had mentally cursed GIR a million times over for hitting those buttons-and yet, something within him told him that these changes weren't necessarily bad ones-
That was it. There was something new inside of him, something he had not possessed before. It was something that made him look at the humans, so pathetically clinging to eachother, with a new sense of understanding. It wasn't such a bad thing to have someone to cling to, someone to comfort you. It was despised on Irk, considered weak and foolish. He had been lying to Dib-it wasn't the norm to pair the males on Irk because it wasn't the norm to pair anyone. They were reproduced in tubes.
For not the first time, he thought about the tubes. According the the Tallest, who controlled them, it was the most efficient way to breed. Allow only the most necessary functions of the Irken to survive, only the instinct to overtake and command. He had never questioned this now, but he was questioning it now. Why was this considered a good thing? Was this thing inside of him always gone, or merely made dormant by the tube's influence?
He would have to study this later. He had to plan. Tomorrow would be an interesting day. He had decided to allow Dib to believe the kiss was innocent and that he himself was naive-for now. Dib would believe it.
Ah, Dib...how wonderful it would be to have him at last. To clutch him in his arms, knowing that at last his heart could be destroyed.
He suddenly felt a pang akin to the ones he had suffered that morning. Why? Why whenever he thought of Dib? It was true he had developed a kind of grudging affection for him-after all, he was being presented a challenge. Being Irken, he was happy to rise to it. And the boy was very intelligent, thus making it all the more interesting.
He slapped himself in the head in annoyance. Why was he wasting his time thinking like this? It would make things to easier when the time came to crush Dib at last. Shaking his head in annoyance at his own stupidity, he decided to go down into the lab.
Tomorrow was only a few hours away.
-
Dib stared out his window. The kiss was all he could think of. It was about 11. If he felt like it, he could have got online and asked around the Swollen Eyeballs. However, the idea just didn't appeal to him. Plus, he was a little afraid of running into that creepy Optic_Nerve guy again.
"I guess...I guess I could let him do what he wants." Dib was slowly turning red with thoughts of what he would want...but think of the research value! It would basically be donating his body to science, he thought, quirking his lips. What it meant he could always worry about later.
"Dib!" Gaz pounded on the door. "Hey! Have you seen my Gorrilaz CD?"
He got up and opened the door. "Naw. Did you leave it downstairs?"
"I don't think so..." She furrowed her eyebrows. "I hope I didn't leave it in the car. Fin wanted to borrow it."
"Oh. Ill help you look later. Fin and I are going to watch some movies this weekend...you wouldn't want to, um..." He looked away. "Come watch them with us?"
He flinched, waiting for the inevitable rejection. He was shocked by the smile that spread over her face. "Okay."
"Um, great!" Wow. Gaz was actually agreeing to spend some time with him. "You really like Fin, huh."
"Yeah. Are you gonna date her?"
"No."
"Well, can I?"
Dib started. Gaz laughed. "Just kidding. Im gonna go look in my room. See you later."
"Night." Gaz jogged down the hall to her room. She picked up her phone and dialed.
"H'lo?"
"Hey, Fin." Gaz sighed. "Dib seemed a little shocked. I dunno if its such a good idea."
"Well..." the voice on the other end seemed hesitant. "Maybe we should break it to him slowly?"
"Okay." Gaz laughed a little. "Im just...not sure about any of this."
"Noone ever is. That's the beauty of the system." Fin's voice dripped with sarcasm. "Look, I gotta get some rest. Ill talk to you tomorrow."
"Okay. Gnight."
"Night, sweetie."
Jibaku-chan
*Proud supporter of IZ slash!*
"Open your heart. Straddle the fence. Obey the fist."
