The Practical Joke
Chapter Two
Hermione sat contently in front of the common room fire, her
back hot from the flames. She glanced from her Arithmacy homework
over to Ron, who was studying next to her. He must have been working
very hard, because his tongue was sticking out slightly, like
it did whenever he was concentrating. He ran his fingers through
his hair in frustration, making it stick out messily. She sighed;
Ron was adorable.
"What am I doing?" she thought as she returned to her
homework. It was stupid looking at Ron like that--like an adorable
boy and not her best friend. She felt an overpowering urge to
break the silence, "Hey Ron."
"Mmm?" said Ron, not looking up from his homework,
which annoyed Hermione, because her parents, honorable dentists,
had always taught her to look someone in the eye when you're speaking
to them. But she couldn't help but smile because Ron's tongue
was still sticking out.
"Parvati fancies Fred!"
"WHAT?" said Ron, his face illuminating with shock,
"Someone fancies FRED?"
"Must be that old Weasley charm."
Ron laughed, then Hermione realized what she had just said. What
if Ron took it the wrong way? But then again, she had just been
analyzing Ron's cuteness.
"Hey guys!" said a beaming Fred.
"Come up with any plans yet?" said Ron.
"Of course!" Fred replied.
"Just don't do anything mean!" said Hermione in a mum
voice, "Because I fancied a boy once, but all he ever did
was yell at me."
She wasn't quite sure whether she was tallking about the boy
from primary school or Ron. Fred, on the other hand, knew perfectly
well whom she was refering to. He looked from Hermione to Ron
and grinned. They, of course, would be the target of future practical
jokes, but now he had to focus on Parvati. A tidal wave of giggles
poured out from the portrait hole, and Fred turned to see Parvati,
her face crimson, her ears violet. He quickly jogged over to her,
came to one knee, and crooned, "Oh, my dearest Parvati, I
feared for so long that my love for thou was unrequited, but now
I am happy--happier than the happiest happy thing that ever lived
a happy, happy life."
"I'll bet she's gonna think twice before getting a crush
on Fred again," whispered Ron to Hermione as Fred transfigured
his holey sock into the ugliest boquet of flowers that anyone
had ever seen. From most sources, Hermione had heard that one
always wants what one can't have, so she, Fred, and just about
the whole world had expected Parvati to recoil in fear at Fred
recipricating her feelings. Instead, she grinned, accepted the
ugly flowers, and hugged him.
Fred is not a hugging person.
The moment she wrapped her arms around him, it looked like he was going to break out in hives and swell up like a balloon. It fascinated Parvati that someone could actually be allergic to hugs, so she hugged him even harder, seeking to cease his torment. Parvati's intent was pure, but all it did was make Fred cough and sputter, "Let go!," much to the amusement of Ron and Hermione. Realizing that maybe hugging was perhaps not the best medicine for Fred's "tormented soul," Parvati let go of him, and apologized profusely. Sometime during the hilarity of seeing Fred nearly spontaneously combust at human contact, Hermione and Ron, practically convusling with laughter, had rolled off their couch and onto the floor, on top of each other...
Okay, so I was having the worst day I've had in a long time, and then I got home to check my mail, which normally cheers me up because people say nice things.... but no, not today. Today is not Ziegod's day. Today I got the FIRST flame ever. It was the last thing I could take, so I started crying. It's a stupid, stupid thing to cry over, I know, but I have a tendency to bottle stuff up until exploding snap. So all you flamers out there, go to Slytherin, get knocked out by a bludger, and be treated by Gilderoy Lockhart. But to all you nifty nice people, thanks for reviewing and saying something nice to make my day better!
Thanks,
Ziegod
P.S.-Mean people suck, and I know the ending of this chapter
was chliche.
