A week passed, then two, and she heard nothing from any of the boys about the two prisoners. Heero and Michael both helped with duties that she had always performed herself, some mathematical calculations only she could do in the absence of huge computers the Rebels couldn't afford, breaking into the Alliance's computer to find out what they were doing; breaking codes, investigating new members of the Rebels, to make sure there were no traitors present. The only reason that the Rebels had survived as long as they had was due to the absolute loyalty of everyone involved. In the fifty years since the Alliance first came, the numbers of Rebels had grown slowly, so slowly that at first the Alliance hadn't noticed them. In the last ten years, though, the Alliance had taken notice, especially since Mike defected. When Rina joined the Rebels, there were dozens of Alliance agents within the Rebels. Rina had practice finding loyalty in those around her - all of those in her father's household had strong reason to hate the Alliance. If she hadn't found them they most likely would have joined the Rebels, given time. Oh, yes, she knew a lot about loyalty, which was why the infestation of Alliance agents within the Rebels had troubled her so much. She had searched them out and either eliminated them herself or had them eliminated, once she had more power. One of those traitors had been the first person she had ever killed...
When she'd first started this assignment she'd set for herself, she'd read up on some rather strange books about reading people's intentions through their body language. None of the Rebels, except Mike, thought much about her, even though she'd been the one giving them information for the last few years. They looked at her as nothing more than a strange kid. None of them knew just how strange she was. But then, how could they? They hadn't seen her get up and walk away after being hit by a car.
She'd been looking through the lists of Rebels... they hadn't given her access yet, but they also couldn't keep her out of the system. And now she'd noticed something odd about one of the Rebels - a man named George. There was nothing special about him - he was just a lower-level Rebel, didn't have much useful access, hadn't shown any real initiative, but something... His background didn't fit. He said that in a sweep, his wife had been taken by the Alliance for no reason he could think of. Then there was an accident while she was in Interrogation, and both she and their unborn child died. Rina had seen a tape of him revealing this information, the anger in his voice seemed real, as did the tears in his eyes, tears that he bravely tried to hide. But his body language didn't fit the story he told. She doubted he'd ever had a wife at all, and therefore the reason for his hatred of the Alliance wasn't valid. So what was he doing here?
He was a spy. She knew it, had known it for several days. He had something implanted in his hand, some kind of recording device that he activated by pressing his middle and little finger against certain points in his palm - she'd seen him do it, only during the few meetings with higher Rebels that he attended. She'd tried to tell this to the other Rebels, but no one except Mike believed her, and he only shrugged helplessly, saying that he believed her but there was nothing he could do about it. So she went into the Alliance computer and pulled his files from their database. She presented them to the Rebels, but they didn't believe the files were genuine. They were aware of how good she was at making fake files - now they wouldn't believe her.
Rina was tempted to just leave the Rebels to fend for themselves, to get mired down by the traitors within their own organization until the Alliance crushed them, but nothing was ever that simple. For one thing, the Rebels really were needed - someone had to resist the Alliance. Also, the only reason she'd been so effective so far was because the Rebels did all of the real work for her - she'd be pathetically ineffective by herself. She could still get stuff done, but it was nothing like what she could accomplish now. Another reason was that they were decent people, most of them - it wasn't their fault that they couldn't trust a ten-year-old. And there was yet another reason she couldn't just leave - George had seen her, and had probably heard the rumors that she was their mysterious source, who fed them information about the Alliance. He probably didn't believe them, but that wouldn't stop him from reporting her presence, and then the Alliance would look into her background, realize what orphanage she was adopted from, and her secret was out.
She didn't think that he had contacted his superiors since she'd arrived, but her time had to be running short. She had to stop him before then. So she faked an order from the Rebels' leaders and sent it to his quarters, ordering him to a particular alley in a bad part of Alpha. The area had only sprung up after the Alliance arrived - it held the people that they didn't want contaminating most of the colony, the people who might mess up their perfect image. The Rebels got a lot of supporters from that region. George thought he was being sent to pick up some orders from another Rebel base - he was probably excited about the prospect of getting access to such orders.
A shudder ran up and down her spine as she made preparations. He had to die. If she did anything else, he would eventually make it back to the Alliance and inform on her. Alpha was big enough that she might be able to hide for a while - it was, after all, the size of a small country, almost entirely city; but it was only a matter of time until they tracked her down. Rina tried to control her shaking hands as she strapped a knife to her ankle, another to her waist, and tucked her gun into the back of her pants. She pulled on a large overcoat, three sizes too big for her and better suited in style for a boy. She pulled her hair up and hid it under a hat, and she smudged her face with dirt.
The region of the city that she was heading towards was one that no sane girl would ever head into, not on purpose, and it would be hard to go there by accident. The lines that separated it were clearly marked, not by white lines on the pavement, although that might have been more discreet. At the boundary of the region, the buildings suddenly changed. The buildings were covered in grime despite the cleanliness of the rest of the dome. The cleaning crews that were supposed to take care of this area had been dismissed by the Alliance when the locals started harboring people with Rebel sympathies decades earlier. So the grime from everyday activities built up until they looked like they'd all been painted various shades of dark brown, as opposed to the gray buildings found everywhere else. So the separation was clear. The people in this region had been basically abandoned by the Alliance - they received no food, no water... When the sanctions were first ordered, there were protests, and the Alliance had arrested one member of every household to ensure obedience. After that people shut up or moved out of the region, if they could. Now the region held less than one-eighth of its original inhabitants, and these survived because of the generosity of a few charity groups in better parts of the dome. The Rebels provided discreet aid to the inhabitants, and got a lot of new members from there, mostly in thanks. The Alliance was aware of this, although not of the numbers involved, and ran frequent sweeps to discourage 'troublemakers'. So in addition to the lack of food, constant filth, and danger from diseases that had been eliminated in civilized societies for generations, the inhabitants lived in constant fear of arrest and imprisonment or execution. The Alliance had been known to do the latter with no evidence, killing entire families as examples. Rina didn't know how the majority of the dome could remain unaware of the conditions here - maybe they just didn't want to see the problems. It was to an abandoned part of that region that she was headed.
No one noticed her as she slipped out of the Rebel base they had brought her to. They hadn't shown her any others yet, as if she was a security risk. As if she didn't know where they were already. She walked all the way to the alley where he would be waiting. She didn't want to risk taking a cab - kids didn't travel alone into that area of the colony, unless they lived there, in which case they didn't have the money to take a cab. She would be too memorable, so she walked nearly eight klicks by herself, always alert for a mugger or worse. But she had chosen her disguise well, and the book on body language had taught her more than just how to tell when people were lying. They had told her how to look at the different body language of people from different regions, and how to copy it so that she fit in. She didn't have any trouble on the walk. He was there when she arrived.
"Get out of here, kid," he said, thrusting a hand at her. He was also dressed for moving around in this region.
Her hand still trembling, Rina pulled the gun out from under her coat and aimed it at him. Pull the trigger, she told herself. He has to die. But her hands wouldn't seem to obey her brain - she just stood there with the gun aimed at him, not able to move. After a while he said, "If this is a robbery, kid, you're not going about it the right way."
"It's not a robbery," she said, her voice shaky.
"Hey, you're a girl!" he exclaimed, and stared at her more closely. "You're that kid from back at the... base," he said, dropping his voice in case someone was around to hear. There wasn't - Rina had checked that out, first. This region of the city was mostly deserted, because the Alliance made several raids around here a few weeks ago. "What the hell are you doing here?"
"I've come to kill you before you can betray us to the Alliance," she said. Pull the damn trigger!
"What? I don't know what you've been eating, kid, but I'd stop it. You know who I am. I'm here on assignment, right now. Get away before you scare away my contact!"
"There was no mission. I sent those orders to get you out here, alone."
"You what?! You little bitch!" He started to lunge for her, but a slight motion from the gun gave him pause. Just pull the trigger. Her fingers still refused to obey her mind, and her father's words, spoken sometime in the past, came back to her. Murder is murder, no matter how justified. And the ends do not necessarily justify the means.
Rina realized that in bringing this man here to kill him, she'd gone around the Rebels, disobeying them and committing murder in order to protect them. Did the ends justify the means?
He saw the gun waver in her fingers, and took a step forward. "Don't move!" she ordered, then held back a wince, realizing how stupid that sounded.
He caught it, too. "Or what? You'll shoot me? I thought you were going to kill me anyway, little girl." He took another step forward, arm outstretched. "Come on, just give me the gun, and I might forget that I ever saw you with the Rebels. I'm not afraid of you - you're just a kid. You don't have it in you."
With the Rebels. The words stuck in her mind. He spoke of them as an outsider. He was a spy. Rina's determination returned. "I'm not a kid," she told him.
"Oh, really? Why is that?" he asked, and leaped at her. By then he was very close, and one of his grasping hands hit the gun, shoving it aside. His other hand went for her throat, but his sudden action shocked her out of her paralysis. She jumped back before he could grab her throat, and slammed her foot into his stomach, not bothering to ration her strength. The impact sent him flying into one of the walls, and his head hit the wall and stunned him, for a second. Before her resolution could fail, Rina raised the gun and fired a bullet into him. The silencer on the gun made the shot almost inaudible, except to her ears.
She'd aimed badly. The bullet had missed his heart, passed through one of his lungs. It took several minutes for her to realize that the wound might not be fatal, not for hours. The thought made her want to throw up. I've got to end this, she thought, and walked up to him, still holding the gun in her hands. He was laying on the ground, and as she stood beside him, he looked up at her with anger, disbelief, and accusation in his eyes. She could almost hear his thoughts, How could a mere child do this to me?
A sudden change came over her, as if all of her emotions were shut off, leaving nothing but her intellect and the job she had to do. "This is why," she told him, and fired one shot into his head, killing him instantly. She stared at the body for a second, then hid the gun and pulled out her knife. I have to finish all of this...
Rina started and pulled out of the memory. Damn the doctors that had done this to her! Thanks to their genetic meddling, she experienced some memories as if they were actual events, reliving them over and over and over again. And it was always the worst memories that replayed the most often, the most vividly. Sometimes, like now, she was able to pull out of them before they were over, but that always left her with a sense of something unfinished, and it ensured that the memory would return in the next few days. Might as well get it over with now, she thought, and let the memory play out...
The emotional block lasted for several hours, long enough for her to complete her business and return to the Rebel base. She walked in on one of their planning meetings and tossed the bloody recording device on the table. "Girl! What the hell are you doing? What is that?" someone demanded.
"It's the recording device George had hidden in his hand, the one he was going to give to the Alliance. Scan it, there are several recordings with your voices on it."
No one moved towards the bloody object. Finally Mike asked, "Where did you get this?"
Rina stared at him coldly. "I told you. It was in his hand."
Someone put their hand to their mouth and rushed out of the room.
"You dug it out of his hand?" Mike asked, turning pale himself.
Rina nodded. "After I killed him, I dug it out. The Alliance will get nothing from him now, even if they find the body, which I doubt they will." She cast one look around the table, seeing the disbelief and horror on the faces all around her. "I suggest you scan everyone's hands for these. You might catch some more traitors that way."
The remaining Rebels stared at her in varying degrees of shock, with horror and disgust evident on all of their faces. She realized then that they'd never really accepted what she was, even when she revealed herself, they continued to think that she was human. They wouldn't make that mistake again - she'd truly revealed herself now, and she doubted that they would ever look at her the same way again. Hopefully that meant that next time they'd listen to her.
After that meeting, she'd returned home and she snuck into the house. She immediately went upstairs to take a bath. She'd cleaned the blood off her hands and clothes, but she couldn't rid herself of the feeling that her hands were still covered with his sticky blood. She took a bath, and got ready to go to bed. Normally she stayed up until early in the morning, raiding the Alliance's computer, but today's activities had tired her out. It wasn't until she was lying in her bed, ready to go to sleep, that the emotional block, if that's what it was, disappeared. I've killed a man. Sobs shook her young body as she tried to deal with what had just happened. Her father heard her and came into the room.
"What's happened?!" he exclaimed, alarmed.
His presence was enough to make her get control of herself. She didn't answer for a minute, then said in an emotionless voice, "I killed a man today."
"You what?!" The horror in his voice was enough to make her start crying again.
"In God's name, why?"
"He was a traitor," she explained between her sobs. She realized now that in some ways she had remained very young, until today. "He was going to turn over information to the Alliance about the Rebels, and about me, too. He had to die, so I tricked him into the Bad Sector, and I killed him. I even got the recorder, so the Alliance won't find it. I did what I had to do," she said, her voice strengthening slightly. "He could have caused many deaths, could have destroyed an entire cell of the Rebels. And he knew who I am. I had to do it." Her crying was over now, but she sat for a long time in her father's arms.
He stroked her head, a gesture meant to reassure a child, but she didn't resist. He even rocked her back and forth a little, like she was a baby, until she fell asleep. She clearly remembered him saying, over and over again, "My daughter. My poor little girl."
The memory ended, and Rina 's mind returned to the present. That was the last time he called me 'his little girl', she remembered suddenly.
Why do the worst memories always come back the strongest? Rina didn't know, probably would never know, because she'd never told anyone about the memories, not even Mike or her father, the two people in the world who knew her best.
Well, the two people I trust the most, at any rate. There was no doubt that all five of the boys knew her almost as well as she knew herself. It was a very discomforting thought, that she was enough like them that she could empathize and understand a killer like Kan.
Rina shook her head. It was a stupid thought - Kan, like the rest of them, was exactly what they had twisted him into. Just because he seemed worse than the others didn't mean he was - he was just more outspoken about it. She was always in a brooding mood after one of those damned memory-lapses. They were coming more often, now. Was that simply because she was getting older, or because of what was coming? Avert. She turned her mind away from that thought. Now was not the time to think about that, she had work to do, and she had plenty of time to think about it. She would think about it late at night, after her work was done, when she was supposed to be sleeping. There were far too many hours she had spent that way.
Rina went back to studying the political situation on Earth. They were isolated out here in the colonies, but there was some communication, and every bit of information was vital. Earth was the home of the Alliance and their base of support, but there were Rebels there, as well. Rina did the best she could to aide them, to get them public support as she had in the colonies, but it was very difficult with the limited contact, and very frustrating. She was glad of the interruption when someone knocked on the door of her office. Arthur stuck his head in, then his body followed. "Hello."
"Hi," Rina replied, turning away from the computer with a sense of profound relief. "How's it going?"
"Herc is frustrated, angry... but I think we may be getting somewhere. It's hard for him to ignore all of us."
Rina nodded. "And Kan?"
"That's what I wanted to talk to you about. Kan has stopped talking to any of us. He refuses to speak to anyone except the Phoenix."
"He wants a shot at me," Rina observed.
"He doesn't know who you are, yet," Arthur said.
"What? How couldn't he?"
"Sometimes Kan lets his anger cloud his reasoning," Arthur said matter-of-factly. If anyone else had delivered that judgement, there would have been a frown of disapproval, or maybe a smirk at his weakness. Arthur... either he really didn't feel any of those things, or he concealed it so well that Rina couldn't tell the difference. She didn't really want to know the truth. I want to keep on believing that at least one of us has some innocence left. It makes me feel like maybe there's still something in me.
"So what do you want to do?"
"I want you to meet with him, tell him the truth, the way you did with me and Heero. He hasn't seen the color change yet, either."
"Why haven't you told him?" Rina asked, surprised.
Arthur shrugged. "I have my reasons. Will you do it?"
"Arthur, are you sure you want me to do this? It will be the same as it was for you - I won't soften it at all."
"Yes."
"All right. I will. But not now, not in the mood I'm in."
"No, I want you to do this right now."
"Trust me, you don't."
"Yes, I do. He needs a shock, and badly."
Rina stared at him, suddenly realizing that she was being manipulated. He had waited until now to come to her precisely because he knew that she was in a bad mood. For some reason he wanted this to turn into a huge fiasco, as she knew it would. Rina decided she didn't like being used this way, but held back her tongue. He must have a reason for it, she told herself. Just like I always have a reason when I do it. It's just that most of the people I manipulate don't realize what's happening. Or do they, and they humor me by not telling me, the way I won't tell Arthur? An interesting and disturbing thought, but not her business right now. "He'll go after me physically, right?"
"Probably. I'll be with you to control him."
"Since when do I need protection from anyone?" she asked, and got the satisfaction of seeing him blush. "You want me to hammer the truth into his head? I think being beaten by a girl will do that for him."
Arthur tried to hide a wince, probably at the thought of a physical confrontation between her and Kan, and failed. "Yes, that will probably do it."
---------
Kan was sitting on the mattress, staring into space, much the way Heero had at first. His eyes didn't move from the far wall, but she knew he'd seen them enter.
"Why do you bring this girl?" he asked, sounding as if it was a great effort to speak each word. "I will speak to none but the Phoenix."
No time like the present. "You fool," Rina said scornfully. "You really don't know, do you?"
That got his attention, and he actually turned his head to look at her. "What did you say?" he asked in a low, flat tone, with the barest hint of anger in it.
"I said that you are a fool. Both Michael and Herc saw it."
"Saw what?" he said, resuming his previous position, his tone making it clear that he didn't care what she had to say. Too clear. He meant for me to catch that.
"You still don't see it," she said, bending down closer to him but still well out of his reach. "You asked to talk to the Phoenix. Here I am, and you don't even realize it."
He actually laughed, a little. "Do you think I am truly stupid?! The Phoenix is a warrior, a brilliant tactician. You're a schoolgirl." His tone was scornful.
Rina was at once amazed and disgusted by his attitude, and a little admiring that he managed to keep his voice like that even in this situation. "Arthur," she said, making sure he heard the amusement in her voice. "Tell him who I am."
"It's true, she's the Phoenix," Arthur said in that simple, innocent tone that was so deceiving.
Kan flicked an eye at them. "You lie. If she truly was the Phoenix, she would have no need of your protection."
He's planning on attacking me, no doubt, but he still doesn't believe that I'm the Phoenix. Why? In a flash of insight, she realized his motives. He just wants to get back at me for capturing him! she thought, amazed. Arthur had been right, he really was letting anger cloud his judgement, otherwise he would have realized who - and what - she was long ago. Time to snap him out of that as well.
"Arthur," she said, careful to keep derisive amusement in her voice, "Leave. Don't come back until I call you."
"But..." Arthur cut off his objection and meekly inclined his head. "Yes sir."
Rina couldn't help but stare as he withdrew from the room. That was a new mannerism, one she'd never seen before. What did it mean? She turned her attention back to Kan. He was the danger here. There was no doubt in her mind that Arthur would disobey her orders to come back in if he saw she was in danger, but she couldn't afford to show weakness like that in front of Kan. "Still don't believe me, do you?"
His only response was to attack. Even though she was prepared and waiting for it, the speed of it still caught her off-guard. Before she could react, he had slid across the floor and swept her feet out from under her. As her back hit the ground, Rina knew a moment of true fear. She had never thought, never expected that he would catch her off-guard like that. In that one moment, she realized that she really could die in here. Help was only a few seconds away, but she could still be dead before it got here. She couldn't die like this! It wasn't supposed to happen like this!
All of that was pushed aside as the emotionless calm took over, and she was rolling out of the way as Kan's foot came down where her head had been. In a second she was back on her feet and attacking him. The speed and strength of her attack caught him momentarily off-guard, and she used that to her advantage. She landed two solid blows and a kick that knocked him into the wall before he managed to get his guard up. She smiled, letting her face show none of the fear she had felt a second earlier. "You are weak. Can't even manage to kill an unarmed girl, heh?"
With a betrayed look on his face, he stared at her. "How?"
"How? Oh, you should already know the answer to that," she said loftily. She resisted the urge to rub her legs - his kick had hurt! "Come on, you've had the same clues as the others. Why are you the only one who can't figure it out? You shot me with one of those darts, didn't you? And then I got up and shot you... and then you got up..."
She saw him working his way through it, and noticed, when he narrowed his eyes to concentrate, that they were slightly slanted, like some of the races on Earth. Now why would they have done that? she wondered. Then she saw him realize the truth. "You're..."
"The Phoenix," she finished for him with a smirk. "And your sister, in a way. I can't believe you didn't see it before. No regular human could have gotten up after getting shot by one of those darts, but I did."
"You..."
"The others were right when they said you allow anger to cloud your judgement," she said carelessly, as if she had just let that comment slip out. She saw anger in his eyes. "And this isn't the first time you've failed to kill me."
"What?!" he demanded harshly.
"Oh, come on. Surely you remember the last mission? The one you failed at? When you were sent to murder Ambassador Krace? The man who adopted me?"
"You?" he asked. "No, that's impossible! I saw an Earthling run from the roof, and I saw you a few minutes later..." he trailed off as she began to change colors.
"Which Earthling was it?" she asked, turning her hair blond. "This one? Or maybe it was this one," she said, darkening both her skin and hair to a deep brown. "I use so many, it's hard to keep them straight. Oh, and that reminds me. I never got back at you for shooting me in the leg, did I?" She advanced on him threateningly, but he held his ground, then attacked her again. He hit her hard in the side several times and even punched her face before she disengaged. Better not try that again, she thought, feeling the sting on her cheek. He's faster than I am. "Good to know there's still some fight in you," she said condescendingly. "Now, what was it you wanted to ask the Phoenix?"
"You..." he said again. This time the word started as a threat and ended as a question, an interesting combination. She wondered if he was capable of forming a complete sentence. He was badly shaken and for a moment she wondered if she had pushed too hard. No, she decided, observing the keen look in his eyes. He was shaken, but the core of him was untouched. This was just what Arthur wanted of me. Should I leave now, or press?
The decision was taken out of her hands as a light flashed above the door, and Rina nodded at the cameras, giving permission for someone to enter. The door opened and Heero, Arthur, and Michael walked in. "I've finished the mission," Heero said to her, completely ignoring Kan, who had backed into a corner and remained there.
Mission? Oh, yes, Heero had gone to one of the Alliance's munitions depots, to see how tight the security was. Smuggling in weapons from Earth was the only way to get them, since no weapons were produced on Centari, but it was an expensive and dangerous proposition. If they could steal the weapons from the Alliance, it would be a lot cheaper, and besides, they could deny their enemies the use of those weapons. Rina had wanted to make such a raid for years, but they'd never been able to get enough intel about the actual workings of the base to make it a justifiable risk. Although she wished the Alliance would make her life easier by putting everything they did on the main computer so she could access it, they rarely obeyed her wishes, and few projects or operations were as well documented as Project Titan.
"I'll want your report immediately," Rina said with a nod to the others, and walked out of the room without a backward glance. Kan would feel that she had dismissed him as insignificant, too weak to be judged a threat. That's obviously what Arthur wanted - now he was going to try to pick up the pieces. Rina stopped outside the door when both Michael and Heero followed her. "Is it a good idea to leave Arthur alone with him?" she asked, jerking her head back towards the room.
"Arthur can take care of himself," Heero replied. As always, he was expressionless. "Unlike you. That was one of the poorest displays of combat I've seen from one of us."
That stung, and it irritated Rina that it did. "Really? Then what do you recommend for me to fix this weakness?" She didn't bother to try to hide her irritation, or to keep the acid out of her voice. Unconsciously she clenched her fists as she faced Heero across the hall.
"Don't be too hard on her, Heero," Michael said in that soft voice of his. "It's not her fault."
They both turned to stare at her. "How do you come to that conclusion?" Heero asked. "Her reaction time is as good as ours - they didn't design her any differently, so the fault must be with her."
"She has had only humans to train against," Michael said, as if it should be obvious. "We trained against each other. We all have the same reaction speeds, so we've had to keep up with each other. She's had no one who could challenge her. Who could fight against her and tell her if she wasn't performing at her top efficiency?"
"Well, how do you suggest I fix it?" Rina asked, interested by the analysis. She'd never thought that she'd be weaker like this because she didn't have anyone as strong as her.
"Fight us."
Rina held back a groan. Of course, the simplest solution was often the best. But that didn't mean she was going to enjoy it - she had a feeling Heero wouldn't hold anything back, even in practice, and of course, the others would probably follow his lead. Oh, this is going to be fun.
When she'd first started this assignment she'd set for herself, she'd read up on some rather strange books about reading people's intentions through their body language. None of the Rebels, except Mike, thought much about her, even though she'd been the one giving them information for the last few years. They looked at her as nothing more than a strange kid. None of them knew just how strange she was. But then, how could they? They hadn't seen her get up and walk away after being hit by a car.
She'd been looking through the lists of Rebels... they hadn't given her access yet, but they also couldn't keep her out of the system. And now she'd noticed something odd about one of the Rebels - a man named George. There was nothing special about him - he was just a lower-level Rebel, didn't have much useful access, hadn't shown any real initiative, but something... His background didn't fit. He said that in a sweep, his wife had been taken by the Alliance for no reason he could think of. Then there was an accident while she was in Interrogation, and both she and their unborn child died. Rina had seen a tape of him revealing this information, the anger in his voice seemed real, as did the tears in his eyes, tears that he bravely tried to hide. But his body language didn't fit the story he told. She doubted he'd ever had a wife at all, and therefore the reason for his hatred of the Alliance wasn't valid. So what was he doing here?
He was a spy. She knew it, had known it for several days. He had something implanted in his hand, some kind of recording device that he activated by pressing his middle and little finger against certain points in his palm - she'd seen him do it, only during the few meetings with higher Rebels that he attended. She'd tried to tell this to the other Rebels, but no one except Mike believed her, and he only shrugged helplessly, saying that he believed her but there was nothing he could do about it. So she went into the Alliance computer and pulled his files from their database. She presented them to the Rebels, but they didn't believe the files were genuine. They were aware of how good she was at making fake files - now they wouldn't believe her.
Rina was tempted to just leave the Rebels to fend for themselves, to get mired down by the traitors within their own organization until the Alliance crushed them, but nothing was ever that simple. For one thing, the Rebels really were needed - someone had to resist the Alliance. Also, the only reason she'd been so effective so far was because the Rebels did all of the real work for her - she'd be pathetically ineffective by herself. She could still get stuff done, but it was nothing like what she could accomplish now. Another reason was that they were decent people, most of them - it wasn't their fault that they couldn't trust a ten-year-old. And there was yet another reason she couldn't just leave - George had seen her, and had probably heard the rumors that she was their mysterious source, who fed them information about the Alliance. He probably didn't believe them, but that wouldn't stop him from reporting her presence, and then the Alliance would look into her background, realize what orphanage she was adopted from, and her secret was out.
She didn't think that he had contacted his superiors since she'd arrived, but her time had to be running short. She had to stop him before then. So she faked an order from the Rebels' leaders and sent it to his quarters, ordering him to a particular alley in a bad part of Alpha. The area had only sprung up after the Alliance arrived - it held the people that they didn't want contaminating most of the colony, the people who might mess up their perfect image. The Rebels got a lot of supporters from that region. George thought he was being sent to pick up some orders from another Rebel base - he was probably excited about the prospect of getting access to such orders.
A shudder ran up and down her spine as she made preparations. He had to die. If she did anything else, he would eventually make it back to the Alliance and inform on her. Alpha was big enough that she might be able to hide for a while - it was, after all, the size of a small country, almost entirely city; but it was only a matter of time until they tracked her down. Rina tried to control her shaking hands as she strapped a knife to her ankle, another to her waist, and tucked her gun into the back of her pants. She pulled on a large overcoat, three sizes too big for her and better suited in style for a boy. She pulled her hair up and hid it under a hat, and she smudged her face with dirt.
The region of the city that she was heading towards was one that no sane girl would ever head into, not on purpose, and it would be hard to go there by accident. The lines that separated it were clearly marked, not by white lines on the pavement, although that might have been more discreet. At the boundary of the region, the buildings suddenly changed. The buildings were covered in grime despite the cleanliness of the rest of the dome. The cleaning crews that were supposed to take care of this area had been dismissed by the Alliance when the locals started harboring people with Rebel sympathies decades earlier. So the grime from everyday activities built up until they looked like they'd all been painted various shades of dark brown, as opposed to the gray buildings found everywhere else. So the separation was clear. The people in this region had been basically abandoned by the Alliance - they received no food, no water... When the sanctions were first ordered, there were protests, and the Alliance had arrested one member of every household to ensure obedience. After that people shut up or moved out of the region, if they could. Now the region held less than one-eighth of its original inhabitants, and these survived because of the generosity of a few charity groups in better parts of the dome. The Rebels provided discreet aid to the inhabitants, and got a lot of new members from there, mostly in thanks. The Alliance was aware of this, although not of the numbers involved, and ran frequent sweeps to discourage 'troublemakers'. So in addition to the lack of food, constant filth, and danger from diseases that had been eliminated in civilized societies for generations, the inhabitants lived in constant fear of arrest and imprisonment or execution. The Alliance had been known to do the latter with no evidence, killing entire families as examples. Rina didn't know how the majority of the dome could remain unaware of the conditions here - maybe they just didn't want to see the problems. It was to an abandoned part of that region that she was headed.
No one noticed her as she slipped out of the Rebel base they had brought her to. They hadn't shown her any others yet, as if she was a security risk. As if she didn't know where they were already. She walked all the way to the alley where he would be waiting. She didn't want to risk taking a cab - kids didn't travel alone into that area of the colony, unless they lived there, in which case they didn't have the money to take a cab. She would be too memorable, so she walked nearly eight klicks by herself, always alert for a mugger or worse. But she had chosen her disguise well, and the book on body language had taught her more than just how to tell when people were lying. They had told her how to look at the different body language of people from different regions, and how to copy it so that she fit in. She didn't have any trouble on the walk. He was there when she arrived.
"Get out of here, kid," he said, thrusting a hand at her. He was also dressed for moving around in this region.
Her hand still trembling, Rina pulled the gun out from under her coat and aimed it at him. Pull the trigger, she told herself. He has to die. But her hands wouldn't seem to obey her brain - she just stood there with the gun aimed at him, not able to move. After a while he said, "If this is a robbery, kid, you're not going about it the right way."
"It's not a robbery," she said, her voice shaky.
"Hey, you're a girl!" he exclaimed, and stared at her more closely. "You're that kid from back at the... base," he said, dropping his voice in case someone was around to hear. There wasn't - Rina had checked that out, first. This region of the city was mostly deserted, because the Alliance made several raids around here a few weeks ago. "What the hell are you doing here?"
"I've come to kill you before you can betray us to the Alliance," she said. Pull the damn trigger!
"What? I don't know what you've been eating, kid, but I'd stop it. You know who I am. I'm here on assignment, right now. Get away before you scare away my contact!"
"There was no mission. I sent those orders to get you out here, alone."
"You what?! You little bitch!" He started to lunge for her, but a slight motion from the gun gave him pause. Just pull the trigger. Her fingers still refused to obey her mind, and her father's words, spoken sometime in the past, came back to her. Murder is murder, no matter how justified. And the ends do not necessarily justify the means.
Rina realized that in bringing this man here to kill him, she'd gone around the Rebels, disobeying them and committing murder in order to protect them. Did the ends justify the means?
He saw the gun waver in her fingers, and took a step forward. "Don't move!" she ordered, then held back a wince, realizing how stupid that sounded.
He caught it, too. "Or what? You'll shoot me? I thought you were going to kill me anyway, little girl." He took another step forward, arm outstretched. "Come on, just give me the gun, and I might forget that I ever saw you with the Rebels. I'm not afraid of you - you're just a kid. You don't have it in you."
With the Rebels. The words stuck in her mind. He spoke of them as an outsider. He was a spy. Rina's determination returned. "I'm not a kid," she told him.
"Oh, really? Why is that?" he asked, and leaped at her. By then he was very close, and one of his grasping hands hit the gun, shoving it aside. His other hand went for her throat, but his sudden action shocked her out of her paralysis. She jumped back before he could grab her throat, and slammed her foot into his stomach, not bothering to ration her strength. The impact sent him flying into one of the walls, and his head hit the wall and stunned him, for a second. Before her resolution could fail, Rina raised the gun and fired a bullet into him. The silencer on the gun made the shot almost inaudible, except to her ears.
She'd aimed badly. The bullet had missed his heart, passed through one of his lungs. It took several minutes for her to realize that the wound might not be fatal, not for hours. The thought made her want to throw up. I've got to end this, she thought, and walked up to him, still holding the gun in her hands. He was laying on the ground, and as she stood beside him, he looked up at her with anger, disbelief, and accusation in his eyes. She could almost hear his thoughts, How could a mere child do this to me?
A sudden change came over her, as if all of her emotions were shut off, leaving nothing but her intellect and the job she had to do. "This is why," she told him, and fired one shot into his head, killing him instantly. She stared at the body for a second, then hid the gun and pulled out her knife. I have to finish all of this...
Rina started and pulled out of the memory. Damn the doctors that had done this to her! Thanks to their genetic meddling, she experienced some memories as if they were actual events, reliving them over and over and over again. And it was always the worst memories that replayed the most often, the most vividly. Sometimes, like now, she was able to pull out of them before they were over, but that always left her with a sense of something unfinished, and it ensured that the memory would return in the next few days. Might as well get it over with now, she thought, and let the memory play out...
The emotional block lasted for several hours, long enough for her to complete her business and return to the Rebel base. She walked in on one of their planning meetings and tossed the bloody recording device on the table. "Girl! What the hell are you doing? What is that?" someone demanded.
"It's the recording device George had hidden in his hand, the one he was going to give to the Alliance. Scan it, there are several recordings with your voices on it."
No one moved towards the bloody object. Finally Mike asked, "Where did you get this?"
Rina stared at him coldly. "I told you. It was in his hand."
Someone put their hand to their mouth and rushed out of the room.
"You dug it out of his hand?" Mike asked, turning pale himself.
Rina nodded. "After I killed him, I dug it out. The Alliance will get nothing from him now, even if they find the body, which I doubt they will." She cast one look around the table, seeing the disbelief and horror on the faces all around her. "I suggest you scan everyone's hands for these. You might catch some more traitors that way."
The remaining Rebels stared at her in varying degrees of shock, with horror and disgust evident on all of their faces. She realized then that they'd never really accepted what she was, even when she revealed herself, they continued to think that she was human. They wouldn't make that mistake again - she'd truly revealed herself now, and she doubted that they would ever look at her the same way again. Hopefully that meant that next time they'd listen to her.
After that meeting, she'd returned home and she snuck into the house. She immediately went upstairs to take a bath. She'd cleaned the blood off her hands and clothes, but she couldn't rid herself of the feeling that her hands were still covered with his sticky blood. She took a bath, and got ready to go to bed. Normally she stayed up until early in the morning, raiding the Alliance's computer, but today's activities had tired her out. It wasn't until she was lying in her bed, ready to go to sleep, that the emotional block, if that's what it was, disappeared. I've killed a man. Sobs shook her young body as she tried to deal with what had just happened. Her father heard her and came into the room.
"What's happened?!" he exclaimed, alarmed.
His presence was enough to make her get control of herself. She didn't answer for a minute, then said in an emotionless voice, "I killed a man today."
"You what?!" The horror in his voice was enough to make her start crying again.
"In God's name, why?"
"He was a traitor," she explained between her sobs. She realized now that in some ways she had remained very young, until today. "He was going to turn over information to the Alliance about the Rebels, and about me, too. He had to die, so I tricked him into the Bad Sector, and I killed him. I even got the recorder, so the Alliance won't find it. I did what I had to do," she said, her voice strengthening slightly. "He could have caused many deaths, could have destroyed an entire cell of the Rebels. And he knew who I am. I had to do it." Her crying was over now, but she sat for a long time in her father's arms.
He stroked her head, a gesture meant to reassure a child, but she didn't resist. He even rocked her back and forth a little, like she was a baby, until she fell asleep. She clearly remembered him saying, over and over again, "My daughter. My poor little girl."
The memory ended, and Rina 's mind returned to the present. That was the last time he called me 'his little girl', she remembered suddenly.
Why do the worst memories always come back the strongest? Rina didn't know, probably would never know, because she'd never told anyone about the memories, not even Mike or her father, the two people in the world who knew her best.
Well, the two people I trust the most, at any rate. There was no doubt that all five of the boys knew her almost as well as she knew herself. It was a very discomforting thought, that she was enough like them that she could empathize and understand a killer like Kan.
Rina shook her head. It was a stupid thought - Kan, like the rest of them, was exactly what they had twisted him into. Just because he seemed worse than the others didn't mean he was - he was just more outspoken about it. She was always in a brooding mood after one of those damned memory-lapses. They were coming more often, now. Was that simply because she was getting older, or because of what was coming? Avert. She turned her mind away from that thought. Now was not the time to think about that, she had work to do, and she had plenty of time to think about it. She would think about it late at night, after her work was done, when she was supposed to be sleeping. There were far too many hours she had spent that way.
Rina went back to studying the political situation on Earth. They were isolated out here in the colonies, but there was some communication, and every bit of information was vital. Earth was the home of the Alliance and their base of support, but there were Rebels there, as well. Rina did the best she could to aide them, to get them public support as she had in the colonies, but it was very difficult with the limited contact, and very frustrating. She was glad of the interruption when someone knocked on the door of her office. Arthur stuck his head in, then his body followed. "Hello."
"Hi," Rina replied, turning away from the computer with a sense of profound relief. "How's it going?"
"Herc is frustrated, angry... but I think we may be getting somewhere. It's hard for him to ignore all of us."
Rina nodded. "And Kan?"
"That's what I wanted to talk to you about. Kan has stopped talking to any of us. He refuses to speak to anyone except the Phoenix."
"He wants a shot at me," Rina observed.
"He doesn't know who you are, yet," Arthur said.
"What? How couldn't he?"
"Sometimes Kan lets his anger cloud his reasoning," Arthur said matter-of-factly. If anyone else had delivered that judgement, there would have been a frown of disapproval, or maybe a smirk at his weakness. Arthur... either he really didn't feel any of those things, or he concealed it so well that Rina couldn't tell the difference. She didn't really want to know the truth. I want to keep on believing that at least one of us has some innocence left. It makes me feel like maybe there's still something in me.
"So what do you want to do?"
"I want you to meet with him, tell him the truth, the way you did with me and Heero. He hasn't seen the color change yet, either."
"Why haven't you told him?" Rina asked, surprised.
Arthur shrugged. "I have my reasons. Will you do it?"
"Arthur, are you sure you want me to do this? It will be the same as it was for you - I won't soften it at all."
"Yes."
"All right. I will. But not now, not in the mood I'm in."
"No, I want you to do this right now."
"Trust me, you don't."
"Yes, I do. He needs a shock, and badly."
Rina stared at him, suddenly realizing that she was being manipulated. He had waited until now to come to her precisely because he knew that she was in a bad mood. For some reason he wanted this to turn into a huge fiasco, as she knew it would. Rina decided she didn't like being used this way, but held back her tongue. He must have a reason for it, she told herself. Just like I always have a reason when I do it. It's just that most of the people I manipulate don't realize what's happening. Or do they, and they humor me by not telling me, the way I won't tell Arthur? An interesting and disturbing thought, but not her business right now. "He'll go after me physically, right?"
"Probably. I'll be with you to control him."
"Since when do I need protection from anyone?" she asked, and got the satisfaction of seeing him blush. "You want me to hammer the truth into his head? I think being beaten by a girl will do that for him."
Arthur tried to hide a wince, probably at the thought of a physical confrontation between her and Kan, and failed. "Yes, that will probably do it."
---------
Kan was sitting on the mattress, staring into space, much the way Heero had at first. His eyes didn't move from the far wall, but she knew he'd seen them enter.
"Why do you bring this girl?" he asked, sounding as if it was a great effort to speak each word. "I will speak to none but the Phoenix."
No time like the present. "You fool," Rina said scornfully. "You really don't know, do you?"
That got his attention, and he actually turned his head to look at her. "What did you say?" he asked in a low, flat tone, with the barest hint of anger in it.
"I said that you are a fool. Both Michael and Herc saw it."
"Saw what?" he said, resuming his previous position, his tone making it clear that he didn't care what she had to say. Too clear. He meant for me to catch that.
"You still don't see it," she said, bending down closer to him but still well out of his reach. "You asked to talk to the Phoenix. Here I am, and you don't even realize it."
He actually laughed, a little. "Do you think I am truly stupid?! The Phoenix is a warrior, a brilliant tactician. You're a schoolgirl." His tone was scornful.
Rina was at once amazed and disgusted by his attitude, and a little admiring that he managed to keep his voice like that even in this situation. "Arthur," she said, making sure he heard the amusement in her voice. "Tell him who I am."
"It's true, she's the Phoenix," Arthur said in that simple, innocent tone that was so deceiving.
Kan flicked an eye at them. "You lie. If she truly was the Phoenix, she would have no need of your protection."
He's planning on attacking me, no doubt, but he still doesn't believe that I'm the Phoenix. Why? In a flash of insight, she realized his motives. He just wants to get back at me for capturing him! she thought, amazed. Arthur had been right, he really was letting anger cloud his judgement, otherwise he would have realized who - and what - she was long ago. Time to snap him out of that as well.
"Arthur," she said, careful to keep derisive amusement in her voice, "Leave. Don't come back until I call you."
"But..." Arthur cut off his objection and meekly inclined his head. "Yes sir."
Rina couldn't help but stare as he withdrew from the room. That was a new mannerism, one she'd never seen before. What did it mean? She turned her attention back to Kan. He was the danger here. There was no doubt in her mind that Arthur would disobey her orders to come back in if he saw she was in danger, but she couldn't afford to show weakness like that in front of Kan. "Still don't believe me, do you?"
His only response was to attack. Even though she was prepared and waiting for it, the speed of it still caught her off-guard. Before she could react, he had slid across the floor and swept her feet out from under her. As her back hit the ground, Rina knew a moment of true fear. She had never thought, never expected that he would catch her off-guard like that. In that one moment, she realized that she really could die in here. Help was only a few seconds away, but she could still be dead before it got here. She couldn't die like this! It wasn't supposed to happen like this!
All of that was pushed aside as the emotionless calm took over, and she was rolling out of the way as Kan's foot came down where her head had been. In a second she was back on her feet and attacking him. The speed and strength of her attack caught him momentarily off-guard, and she used that to her advantage. She landed two solid blows and a kick that knocked him into the wall before he managed to get his guard up. She smiled, letting her face show none of the fear she had felt a second earlier. "You are weak. Can't even manage to kill an unarmed girl, heh?"
With a betrayed look on his face, he stared at her. "How?"
"How? Oh, you should already know the answer to that," she said loftily. She resisted the urge to rub her legs - his kick had hurt! "Come on, you've had the same clues as the others. Why are you the only one who can't figure it out? You shot me with one of those darts, didn't you? And then I got up and shot you... and then you got up..."
She saw him working his way through it, and noticed, when he narrowed his eyes to concentrate, that they were slightly slanted, like some of the races on Earth. Now why would they have done that? she wondered. Then she saw him realize the truth. "You're..."
"The Phoenix," she finished for him with a smirk. "And your sister, in a way. I can't believe you didn't see it before. No regular human could have gotten up after getting shot by one of those darts, but I did."
"You..."
"The others were right when they said you allow anger to cloud your judgement," she said carelessly, as if she had just let that comment slip out. She saw anger in his eyes. "And this isn't the first time you've failed to kill me."
"What?!" he demanded harshly.
"Oh, come on. Surely you remember the last mission? The one you failed at? When you were sent to murder Ambassador Krace? The man who adopted me?"
"You?" he asked. "No, that's impossible! I saw an Earthling run from the roof, and I saw you a few minutes later..." he trailed off as she began to change colors.
"Which Earthling was it?" she asked, turning her hair blond. "This one? Or maybe it was this one," she said, darkening both her skin and hair to a deep brown. "I use so many, it's hard to keep them straight. Oh, and that reminds me. I never got back at you for shooting me in the leg, did I?" She advanced on him threateningly, but he held his ground, then attacked her again. He hit her hard in the side several times and even punched her face before she disengaged. Better not try that again, she thought, feeling the sting on her cheek. He's faster than I am. "Good to know there's still some fight in you," she said condescendingly. "Now, what was it you wanted to ask the Phoenix?"
"You..." he said again. This time the word started as a threat and ended as a question, an interesting combination. She wondered if he was capable of forming a complete sentence. He was badly shaken and for a moment she wondered if she had pushed too hard. No, she decided, observing the keen look in his eyes. He was shaken, but the core of him was untouched. This was just what Arthur wanted of me. Should I leave now, or press?
The decision was taken out of her hands as a light flashed above the door, and Rina nodded at the cameras, giving permission for someone to enter. The door opened and Heero, Arthur, and Michael walked in. "I've finished the mission," Heero said to her, completely ignoring Kan, who had backed into a corner and remained there.
Mission? Oh, yes, Heero had gone to one of the Alliance's munitions depots, to see how tight the security was. Smuggling in weapons from Earth was the only way to get them, since no weapons were produced on Centari, but it was an expensive and dangerous proposition. If they could steal the weapons from the Alliance, it would be a lot cheaper, and besides, they could deny their enemies the use of those weapons. Rina had wanted to make such a raid for years, but they'd never been able to get enough intel about the actual workings of the base to make it a justifiable risk. Although she wished the Alliance would make her life easier by putting everything they did on the main computer so she could access it, they rarely obeyed her wishes, and few projects or operations were as well documented as Project Titan.
"I'll want your report immediately," Rina said with a nod to the others, and walked out of the room without a backward glance. Kan would feel that she had dismissed him as insignificant, too weak to be judged a threat. That's obviously what Arthur wanted - now he was going to try to pick up the pieces. Rina stopped outside the door when both Michael and Heero followed her. "Is it a good idea to leave Arthur alone with him?" she asked, jerking her head back towards the room.
"Arthur can take care of himself," Heero replied. As always, he was expressionless. "Unlike you. That was one of the poorest displays of combat I've seen from one of us."
That stung, and it irritated Rina that it did. "Really? Then what do you recommend for me to fix this weakness?" She didn't bother to try to hide her irritation, or to keep the acid out of her voice. Unconsciously she clenched her fists as she faced Heero across the hall.
"Don't be too hard on her, Heero," Michael said in that soft voice of his. "It's not her fault."
They both turned to stare at her. "How do you come to that conclusion?" Heero asked. "Her reaction time is as good as ours - they didn't design her any differently, so the fault must be with her."
"She has had only humans to train against," Michael said, as if it should be obvious. "We trained against each other. We all have the same reaction speeds, so we've had to keep up with each other. She's had no one who could challenge her. Who could fight against her and tell her if she wasn't performing at her top efficiency?"
"Well, how do you suggest I fix it?" Rina asked, interested by the analysis. She'd never thought that she'd be weaker like this because she didn't have anyone as strong as her.
"Fight us."
Rina held back a groan. Of course, the simplest solution was often the best. But that didn't mean she was going to enjoy it - she had a feeling Heero wouldn't hold anything back, even in practice, and of course, the others would probably follow his lead. Oh, this is going to be fun.
