by NightsDawne
Chapter 2: The Things Nobody Dares To Say
Seifer found Selphie in the cafeteria, sitting at a table with Zell, Quistis, Squall, and Rinoa. He walked up behind her and bent to kiss her shoulder. "I remember, Mrs. Almasy." Four sets of brows were raised in Selphie's direction as all other conversation at the table suddenly stopped.
Selphie burst into laughter at their faces and jumped out of her seat, knocking Seifer in the chin with her elbow as she went to throw her arms around him. "I knew you would! Oh, Seifer, are you alright?" Seifer checked his teeth with his tongue to make sure they were all there before nodding and kissing her.
"Mrs. Almasy?!" Quistis tapped her fingers on the table. "Selphie, what have you done now?"
"I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'D GET MARRIED AND NOT INVITE US!" Half the cafeteria hushed at Zell's shout.
"Um, congratulations, you two?" Rinoa tried to smile. Squall just stared blankly at the couple.
Seifer raised his brow at them. "It's not what you think."
"OH MY GOD! YOU GOT HER PREGNANT!" The rest of the cafeteria fell silent. Quistis clapped her hand over Zell's mouth quickly.
"Stow it, chickenwuss." Seifer wrapped his arms around Selphie's waist. "We're not married, she's not pregnant... I don't think."
"Nope," chirped Selphie, then giggled, turning to lean back against Seifer's chest. "It's just a private joke, you guys. Something we did when we were kids." All four of the others visibly relaxed. "Gee, I guess I see how you'd feel if Seifer and I did get married."
"Don't blame them, babe." Seifer looked away from the table, the other conversations in the cafeteria resuming as his gaze crossed over the crowd. "I'm the biggest mistake you ever made to them, remember? They're just hoping you'll come to your senses eventually and dump me."
"Not... really." Squall surprised Seifer by even talking, much less coming halfway to his defense. He shrugged as Seifer looked at him. "It's her life."
"Wow, thanks for all the support." Selphie pursed her lips. "Um, I think Seifer and I are just going to go for a walk, okay?" She spun on her heel, taking Seifer's hand and leading him towards the exit.
"Selphie!" Quistis stood, watching her best friend go, then dropped back in her seat, putting her hand to her forehead. "Well, we sure did a great job."
"Let them go. They can hang out with Seifer's posse and Irvine." Zell picked up another hot dog from his plate and took a bite.
"She happens to be my best friend, Zell." Quistis sighed. "I'll talk with her later, let her know we didn't mean it."
"Someone should talk to Seifer, too." Rinoa pulled one knee to her chest and looked at Squall. Squall merely resumed eating his french fries in silence. Rinoa frowned, then stood up, pushing away from the table. "Fine, I'll do it." By the time Squall had swallowed his mouthful to protest she was halfway out the door.
Seifer gave Selphie's hand a squeeze as they walked. "You still love me?"
"More every day." Selphie grinned up at him. "What about you?"
"Same."
"Hrmph, figures you'd love yourself." Selphie pouted playfully.
"You know what I meant. I meant I love you." Seifer stopped, running his fingers through her hair and down her jawline to lift her face to his. "Crazy about you. And you're just plain crazy." He bent down to brush his lips to hers.
"Selphie Tilmett, report to the Quad immediately. Selphie Tilmett."
Selphie ducked away from him. "Ut oh, bet it's another problem with the festival decorations. I've got to go take care of it, Seifer." She laid her fingers to his lips to silence his protest. "Don't worry, I'll be back before you have time to miss me."
He sighed as he watched her skip away. "I already miss you," he breathed. He turned to lean against the rail overlooking the center of the garden. A hand touched his arm gently and he started, turning to see his ex-girlfriend next to him. "Rinoa?"
She fixed her dark chocolate eyes on him. "I wanted to apologize. For what happened in the cafeteria."
Seifer shrugged, sticking his hands in his pockets. "Look, it's no big deal. I didn't win a lot of popularity contests before I left, either. I was head of the Disciplinary Committee, not the Triple Triad Club."
"They don't know the real you, Seifer. The one Selphie knows, the one Irvine knows.. the one I knew once." Rinoa turned to the rail, putting her small hands on it.
"Don't tell me you've got any regrets, Rinoa. You're crazy about Squall. All we had was a summer fling."
"I thought it was more at the time. I know, pretty stupid, but it was hard not to get swept off my feet by someone like you."
".... I didn't mean to hurt you." Seifer brushed her dark hair from her shoulder. "I did care. I just wasn't ready and neither were you."
"Why did you do it?"
Seifer furrowed his brow. "Do what? Walk out without saying goodbye? I guess I didn't have the guts to break up with you. Or the guts to keep going out with you."
Rinoa shook her head. "No. I don't mean that. I never blamed you for that. I meant... I meant after Ultimecia.. released you.. why did you try to send me to Adel? It wasn't like you. I don't think the others will ever be able to trust you until we know why you did it." She looked up at him, watching as his face hardened. "I don't think I'll be able to trust you, Seifer."
"That's your choice." He turned away, walking towards the Quad. "Trust who you feel like trusting."
She felt tears welling up in her eyes and spun, running back to the cafeteria.
He kept his eyes down, worried that the next suspicious glance that fell his way would be met with a gloved fist. So they couldn't trust him. He had always known that. He couldn't blame them. He'd tried to kill Rinoa and it couldn't be excused by being possessed. Irvine never asked him about that encounter, neither did Selphie. Both of them shied away from it as if afraid of rekindling whatever madness had hold of him at the time. At least Rinoa had had the guts to ask why. The problem was, he couldn't explain it to her. He couldn't explain it to himself and still live with himself. He kept it locked away in his mind, along with the memories of being controlled by Ultimecia's power, forced into dark recesses where he wouldn't have to face it. It was better this way. He didn't really need their friendship. The only person it was hurting was Selphie. Selphie, the ray of sunshine that made everything alright, that thawed the cold pain of his heart. He looked up, smiling as he saw her bouncing out of the quad, green eyes sparkling and bright smile on her face.
"Seifer!" She threw her arms around him as if they'd been seperated for days instead of only minutes. He laughed and swung her around, then kissed her before setting her back down again.
"You lied. I missed you."
"Well, I'll just have to make it up to you, then. I told them any more emergencies this afternoon and they'd just have to figure it out themselves. I want to go for a motorcycle ride with my boyfriend."
He slid his hand into hers, gripping it tightly like a lifeline. "Your wish is my command, babe. Let's hit the road."
Irvine sucked in his breath as he walked down the hallway, seeing the elevator doors slide open and Headmaster Cid step out. Great. His father. The last person he wanted to see or even be reminded about. He ducked into the classroom quickly, leaning against the wall and hoping it wasn't Cid's destination. A noise from the back of the room drew his attention and he looked that way. Someone was crying behind one of the computer terminals.
He walked quietly over, stopping as he glimpsed a long blue cardigan and long dark hair. "Rinny?" He stepped over and crouched down to put his hand on her shoulder. "What's wrong? It ain't Squall, is it?"
Rinoa shook her head quickly, wiping her cheeks. "No, everything's fine with Squall, Irvy, don't worry about that." She tried to smile, but broke down again, leaning into his open arms. "You're closer to him than anyone else except Selphie. He has to have told you."
Irvine switched gears quickly, realizing she meant Seifer, not her boyfriend. "Seifer? Told me what, Rinny?"
"After the sorceress. Why did he still fight us?" She searched his face as he sat back on his heels, pushing his hat back.
"I dunno. No, he never told me. We don't really talk about that whole thing."
"He won't, will he. Something happened and he won't talk about it. Not to you, not to anyone."
"It was kind of a rough time for him, Rinny."
Rinoa grabbed Irvine's hand, holding it tightly. "Irvy, please, I need you to help me. Help him. You helped Squall when he couldn't talk about what was inside him."
"I dunno, Rinny, this is kinda different."
Rinoa shook her head. "I don't mean talk to him. It wouldn't work with Seifer, we both know that. I already tried, anyway. Help me, Irvy. Please, if we're friends at all you'll do this for me."
Irvine sighed, looking at her tearful face, her eyes beseeching. "Damn, I could never say no to a damsel in distress. Alright, Rinny, what you want me to do?"
"I can't believe you told him we were goin' shoppin'." Irvine shook his head, leaning against the wall of the train car.
"I had to give him some excuse, didn't I? What was I supposed to say, that we were going on a date? That would have gone over really well." Rinoa paced the car.
"Shoppin'? Rinny, when you ever known me ta shop?"
"Oh hush. You're buying a present for Quisty and you need some female advice."
"Shit, what's she gonna be expectin', a ring or somethin'?"
"Will you stop worrying about it? We'll pick up something afterwards. A sweater or something."
"Oh yeah, Esthar's the place ta go shoppin' for sweaters, out in the middle of the desert."
Rinoa threw her hands up. "Stop being so difficult! We'll find something for you to buy her! Don't you want to buy Quisty a present?"
Irvine opened his mouth, then shut it again. "Women and their logic. I ain't got a chance anyway."
"You're a smart man, Irvy." Rinoa grinned and stepped over to kiss him on the cheek.
"I dunno about that." Irvine pulled his hat down over his eyes. "I agreed ta do this with ya, pretty sure sign of total idiocy."
Rinoa punched his arm with a tiny but hard fist. "Meanie."
