Invader Zim: THE DREV SAGA
By Jason a.k.a. The Great Babu
Part 5: GIR's Dream

Legally Legal Things: Yes, I would own Invader Zim if my name was Jhonen Vasquez and could draw good and made comics that kick ass and other stuff that goes "WHEE!", but I'm not..........fucking reality!

AND NOW RELEAVE YOUR BOWELS IN DELIGHT AS PART 5 BEGINS! MY UNDERWARE IS RIDING UP ON ME! CALL THE PIZZA GUY!

(In part 4, Drev stole Zim house and used his stuff to create many of his own design of a SIR known as SAUs (Standard Anarchy Units) which tried to kill Zim, Gaz, Dib, and GIR, but they ran off to Dib's house where Zim used GIR as protection.......that caused GIR to have the splody shit beaten out of him, and the only thing left of him is his head that flew into the window of Dib's house during the fight. He's down, but still (but barely) alive. We see Zim, Gaz, and Dib in their house.)

Zim: DREV YOU SHALL FEAR THIS DAY FOR THIS DAY WILL BE THE DAY I SHALL EXTRACT REVENGE ON YOU FOR DESTROYING MY LOYAL SERVANT GIR! NOT ONLY THAT BUT FOR STEAL MY HOUSE AND....(continues yelling and screaming evilly like Zim always does)

Gaz: Will you shut up? It's too late now. He's dead. (Looks at GIR's head, noticing that his antenna is flashing.) Oh wait, nevermind, he's alive.

Zim: Huh? What?!? (Grabs GIR's head) Yes......YES GIR, you are stronger than you seem! DIB! We must use your lab to repair GIR!

Dib: Why should we? It's stupid!

Zim: BECAUSE I COMMAND IT! Besides, he scares some of the stinky children away from my house! QUICKLY! TO THE LAB!

(Prof. Membrane leaves his lab and enters the living room.)

Prof. Membrane: Helo kids. Oh, it's the foreign boy! So are you here to play with Dib?

Zim: FOOL! A PSYCHO CHILD WHO WANTS TO DESTROY ALL LIFE IS OUTSIDE WITH A TON OF EVILY EVIL ROBOTS ON A KILLING SPREE AND I'M TRYING MY DAMNEST TO BE AN ALLY WITH YOUR SICKLING SON AND DAUGHTER TO TRY TO STOP HIM!

Prof. Membrane: Mmmmmmhmmmm....sounds nice.

Zim: *sigh* Can we use your lab to repair my robot?

Prof. Membrane: No! If you can't treat your toys right, then you must play a price for play things!

Dib: But Dad! It's not a toy! It's-

Prof. Membrane: Absolutly not! Besides, I'm taking a break for 5 minutes and I'm getting me a weenie in the kitchen!

GIR: (Slowly and in a whisper) W-w-w-weeeeeeeeeneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees........

Zim: GIR! Hang in there! Well if he's not gonna let us use his lab, we'll just use one of mine.

Dib: Umm.....Drev took your house! You have no lab!

Zim: (pulls out a controller from his backpack) Simple minded Dib, did you forgot the moon base floating over the Earth? (Zim's place from "Bloaty's Pizza Hog) It's not in the hands of Drev, but because of you two, I had to deactivate the teleporters. Luckily, I can control it from here using THIS! Now, PREPARE TO DO "AWW!" SOUNDS BY MY INCREDIBLE DEVICE!

(Zim pressesa few buttons on the control. Up at the moon base, a hatch opens up and a pod shoots out of it, and in a matter of seconds, it lands in Dib's backyard. It starts to morphs into a shed.)

Zim: THERE! IN THAT SHED IS MY LAB! WE MUST HURRY TO THERE OR A SAU WILL SPOT US! (Grabs GIR's head) NOW LETS GO!

Dib: Right!

Gaz: Does it have video games?

Zim: YOU WANT T-......Yes, yes it does!

Gaz: Good, I'm come along too.

(The three run to the shed quickly and go inside it. Inside it looks a lot like what Zim's underground lab looks like.)

Gaz: Neat. Where's the video games?

Zim: Oh, there is none.

Gaz: (Grinds her teeth and sighs) Fine! I'll help save the world! Just make this quick!

Zim: Fine! (Places GIR on a table and the computer goes into auto-repair. Wires come out of the walls and starts working on GIR.)

(Meanwhile, outside in the city, it is sucha beautiful day......)

Some guy: AHHHHHH!!!!!! THIS ROBOT IS SLICING MY STOMACH OPEN! SOMEONE FUCKING HELP ME! I-(dies)

(SAU's fly around, killing anybody they see. WHEENESS! You can picture how they are killing. At the Skool, Ms. Bitters is looking through a window watching the killings. A SAU is flying at a man running around the front of the Skool yard.)

Man: NO! LEAVE ME ALONE! YOU MADE ME PISS MY PANTS IN FEAR! (Runs up to the window where Ms. Bitters is at.) LADY HELP ME! I THINK IT WANTS TO RAPE ME IN THE BUTT! I DON'T WANT THINGS DONE THERE! NO! AHH! (The SAU cuts off the guy's head, killing him.)

Ms. Bitters: Hmm.......it's not such a bad day after all.

(Back at Zim's shed lab, we see GIR still getting repaired and only has a little bit of his chest and one arm done. Unknown to Zim and the others, GIR is about to have a dream. The dreams starts out GIR, looking normal, in a black area.)

GIR: Hellooooo? Is anybody here? I have some chimichangas if anyone here wants one! THE CHIMICHANGAS!

Deep loud voice: SILENCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (A figure appears above GIR which is a giant version of the Scary Monkey with glowing eyes and is in a meditation position.)

GIR: (Looks up, seeing the monkey) YAY! SCARY MONKEY! GIVE ME YOUR HAIR! (Jumps at the Scary Monkey)

Scary Monkey: QUIET! (GIR is topped and is slammed down to the ground)

GIR: NO!!!!!! I WANNA TOUCH YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!! WHY CAN'T I TOUCH YOU?!?

Scary Monkey: SILENCE! I caused you to be stopped for I have the mystic powers of MIND PUSHYS! Anyway, I am not here to have fun, I am here to get you to FIGHT!

GIR: What?

Scary Monkey: You see, little one, you are 99.9999999999999% crazy most of the time and is barely serious. It's fine by me, but this is a time that you should see the realness of what's going on. The child of darkness is wreaking havoc upon this world and will destroy more and more as time passes. Maybe you would truly see why would should be serious right now if some people tell you warnings....

(Appearing from the darknes is the Krazy Taco Man.)

GIR: *gasp* Almighty taco keeper?!?

Krazy Taco Man: Yes GIR, it's me. If you let Drev destroy all life, then the foods you love will be gone. Tacos, pizza, bacon, and all foods will be gone.....FOREVER!

GIR: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NEED THE GOODNESS!!!!!!!!!!!!

(The Krazy Taco Man disappears and Happy Noodle Boy appears)

Happy Noodle Boy: (says it seriously) I feel the darkness emiting from the groin of evil and will become the magic weasil eater that it is. Stop the flow of the viagra monkeys and find that mentally challenged bowl!

GIR: (pauses in though) Yes............yes I understand.......

(Happy Noodle Boy disappears)

Scary Monkey: And not only these pleasures will be non-existant, but so shall I and every other forms of entertainment you so love!

GIR: Oh...............oh my God.............no.........NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Scary Monkey: You see the futre, and well..............well it's piss. And now you know you must stop the spazticity for the time being. Got it?

GIR: YES! I MUST BE SERIOUS FOR FUN! I MUST!

Scary Monkey: WRONG!

GIR: Huh? But you just told me to be serious!

Scary Monkey: NO! I SAID THAT.........um...........well ya I said that. Dammit I suck in making people motivated! What I really ment to say that you should have a hybrid attitude for the time being and be BOTH serious and spaztic or the universe will suck. Got it?

GIR: Oh...ok!

Scary Monkey: And you're fixed so wake up!

GIR: OKIES!

(GIR wakes up. Noticing that he is fully repaired. At the moment he is spaztic.)

GIR: HELLO!

Zim: AHH! WHAT WAS THAT?!? Oh! GIR is fixed!

GIR: (gets off the table) I.....I had a dream that the Scary Monkey told be to lower my spazticity and be both serious and spaztic.

Dib: Spazticity? That's not even a word!

Gaz: Whatever.....I'm bored lets figure out something so I can go watch TV, alright?

(The grounds starts shaking violently.)

Dib: AHH! AN EARTHQUAKE!

Zim: I DON'T THINK SO! COMPUTER! OPEN A VISUAL SCREEN TO SEE OUTSIDE!

(A screen appears showing outside the neighborhood. They soon see Drev's house shaking madly and increasing every second. All of a sudden it explodes and a giant robot jumps out from the explosion and lands in the center of the nieghborhood. The robot is exactly like the one Zim used from The Nightmare Begins. Inside it lies Drev at the main controls and some SAUs working other controls.)

Zim: WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?!? How did he get one of those! NOT EVEN I HAVE ONE! (I may update this chapter if they tell what the name of the giant robot is in a future episode.)

Dib: Oh my god......we can't stop him now.....

Gaz: Hmm.......I lived an okay life.

(Drev's robot start walking to the city.)

Drev: (from a speaker coming from outside the robot) I'm saving you 3 as dessert. As for now. I'm gonna have fun blowing up crap and braking things in the city. BYE BYE! (continues walking)

Dib: We are doomed. MS. BITTERS WAS RIGHT! DOOMED!

Zim: WRONG, DIB! I will be the one to doom your planet, NOT DREV! AND I WILL KILL THIS ENEMY FOR THE HONOR OF THE IRKEN ARMY! I never expect I had to use my weapon of mass destruction so soon, but this is for other reasons. (Presses some buttons on some controls. At Zim's moon base, another hatch opens up and shoots out another pod which is a lot bigger then the shed pod.) We have to reach Dib's house to have the best chances to reach my robot.

Dib: Your robot?

Zim: You'll see!

(Zim opens up the shed door, seeing some SAUs outside waiting to strike.)

Zim: Awwwwwww....shit...............

GIR: Serious.........and spaztic?

Zim: Huh?

(GIR soon looks like he is thinking really hard.......or constipated. Soon, he flashes and instead of haveing red or blue eyes, it is a purple-ish color, representing half of him is serious and the other is spaztic.)

GIR: I'll stop them!

Zim: NO! You'll die!

GIR: Not this time! Though I feel we cannot beat them now, I feel he can slow them down to reach the house.

(GIR walks up to the SAUs, and the SAUs jump up in the air and are ready to attack.)

GIR: (jump up in the air) CHICKEN POT PIE ON A STICK! (Grabs one of the SAUs heads and thorws it at one of them, causeing them to fall. BRING IT ON! (Flies at the SAUs and pulls out a rocket launcher in one hand and a stuffed hippo in the other. He shoots the rocket killing one SAU and smacks away the other with a hippo.) I GOT MAGIC HIPPO POWERS OF THE DAMNED! (Meanwhile, Zim, Dib, and Gaz sneak to the house. GIR then quickly flies to the door of the house, and shoots a flare from his head to blind the SAUs' sensors. He then enter's the house.) There. I got some of them out of the way!

Zim: GOOD! The pod will be here any second!

(The pod slams into the center of the neighborhood.)

Zim: IT'S HERE! (The 4 go outside) Behold the amazing power of my most powerful weapon! This is such irony the reason I'm using this.....This was made to doom you all but I'm using it to protect this planet....for to use at a later time to doom you all. GAZE UPON IT"S GLORY NOW! (The pod opens up, revealing a giant version of the robotic lawn gnomes in Zim's front yard except it has longer arms and spikes on it's pointy head.) Behold...............THE OMEGA KNOME!!!!!!!

To be continued...........

Part 6: The Mighty Battle coming soon




My armpits smell like roast beef...........I dunno why.......