Chapter 02
The Return of True Love
School was on the horizon and Dawson began to wonder when Joey and Pacey were coming back. He told himself he was over her, and he really believed it… until he drove by the B&B on his way home from the video store, and there she was. Outside talking… with Bessie. You could hear them from where he had stopped. Dawson watched as Bessie and Joey hugged and carried Alexander back into the house. He wanted to jump out of the car and run over and take her in his arms. He knew if he didn't leave now he would do exactly that. He gave her one last look and drove away.
Up in his room he took a look around. There was nothing at all to remind him of Joey, and yet… yet he couldn't forget. He wondered how long she would be back before she came to see him. If she came at all. School was two days away; she could avoid him, until they inevitably bump into each other in the halls, with the forced smiles and niceties. They would say hi and they were fine, then go on their separate ways. He couldn't handle that. Even now she knew him better then anyone… and he wanted her to be part of his life. He sat in silence on his bed… Jurassic Park rattling on the television when a sudden knock jolted. Standing before him, as beautiful as ever was Joey Potter.
"Hi."
She stood in the doorway uncomfortably. Her eyes frantically searching his to see if she was even welcome here.
"Hi." Dawson replied. Taken aback not only by her sudden appearance, but the fact that she used the front door.
"Hi."
She stood there chewing on her lower lip it that innocent way that had a habit of driving him crazy.
"I believe you already said that." Dawson strained to get the words out.
"Yeah. I did. I just wanted to let you know I was home… and…. Um, I'm gonna go."
He knew if he didn't try and salvage this friendship now, he might never, "No, stay. Sit…"
Joey walked slowly in the room and sat on the chair before speaking again. "What are you watching?"
No response from Dawson. He just stared at the screen. "I guess not much has changed huh. It's a Friday night and here you are Speilberg Movie, and all. "
"Why are you here Jo? It's been three months, and not even one word." He looked her straight in the eyes.
She fumbled nervously. "I know I'm probably the last person you want to see, but I did miss you Dawson."
"I wanted to know that you were ok. " Dawson commented.
"I'm good Dawson. How have you been?" She smiled glad he wanted to see her.
"Andie and I are working of movie, she's a really good writer, and we're planning on starting production in a few weeks, Jen and I went to the dive-in that reopened. Oh, and Jack, well, he's been a little busy with Holden."
"Holden?" She asked raising her eyebrow
"OH, Holden is his boyfriend. Andie and I were planning on taking out the boat and we invited Jack. When I pulled in for some gas, I figured I'd get a quick check up. Holden was the mechanic. Him and Jack hit it off immediately. They have pretty much been inseparable since then. Andie says he really nice."
"Wow. I guess some things have changed. Jen still torturing poor Henry, or did he finally give up?"
"Actually she went after him, and they have been together non stop since he got back from camp. Andie said when she saw them at the store they looked really happy…"
Dawson continued talking about the summer and Andie.
She couldn't help but notice that her name came up more often then anyone else. It bothered her. She had made the choice. She had hurt him. What did she expect, that is life would stop to wait for her?
"Joey?" Dawson pulled her out of her thoughts
"What?"
"I asked you how Pacey was.." The words came out, but they were strained.
"Pacey is…. Fine." She said. Trying to hide the truth from him. How could she tell him that things hadn't worked out? That three weeks into the trip the honeymoon faded and any reference made to Dawson caused huge arguments. She had made the mistake of telling Pacey that she had left after a conversation with Dawson. Pacey couldn't help but feel like Dawson had still won. That she still followed his wishes, because she hadn't chosen on her own, because it took Dawson telling her to go for her to go. No matter how she tried to let him know she wanted to make that decision, he still felt like second best. So she got off the boat after a month, and spent the summer working at a Marina to earn enough money to get home
Dawson looked into her eyes and knew something was wrong. He didn't know what, and to be honest he was glad he could still read her eyes, but he didn't want to know. He refused to get caught up in her again. The pregnant pause grew longer.
"Well, I guess I'll be on my way then." She said.
"I'll see you at school on Monday then."
"Bye Dawson." She turned and walked out the door and down the stairs. He waited until she was out the front door before responding.
"Bye Joey." Their senior year of High school was beginning. He only hoped things would get easier.
School started bright and early and he was ready to get back into things. Before classes he went to their spot. Every year he, Andie, Jack, Jen, Joey, & Pacey always sat at the same place. He wondered who would show. Just then he caught sight of Joey. She was walking towards the building, book bag in hand. As he watched she walked right past Pacey, who was standing at the bottom of the stairs, and continued up the steps. He watched her for a second then shook his head and walked off.
He headed to classes and made a mental note to talk to Joey later.
Finally reaching 5th period he walked into English class and took one of the two empty seats left. He was looking at the door when Pacey walked in. He studied the room and found the empty seat, then realized who it was next to and he went pale. Pacey slowly walked over and took the seat next to Dawson.
"Hey man." Pacey mumbled at the bell rang.
Dawson just looked at him. He had lost the gift of speech. Thankfully the teacher took over and class began. It didn't last nearly long enough and soon the bell was ringing. Dawson's day was done he had no sixth period.
"Are you ever going to talk to me again?"
Dawson stopped packing his bag and looked at Pacey, "Well, I wasn't exactly sure what to say. Hey Pace didn't seem quite right."
"A simple no Pacey I don't plan on talking to you again would have sufficed." With this Pacey grabbed his backpack and walked out of the room.
Dawson watched him go, then finished packing his bag and left. When he exited the door he found Pacey waiting for him.
"Dawson, how many times can I say I'm sorry. I didn't want to hurt you." Pacey pleaded.
"I know Pace," Dawson said.
They stood there in uncomfortable silence until Pacey finally sighed and said a goodbye patting Dawson on the shoulder as he left.
After Pacey left Dawson was again adamant about finding Joey, but since he was unaware of her schedule he decided to head home and see what he could do to get ready for production on the new movie. On the way to the parking lot he was lost in thought over her. It really bothered him. Why did he have such a hard time getting over her? She treated him like crap… repeatedly… left him to find herself and never came back…He should have hated her and yet he couldn't. He was distracted when he smacked into someone and dropped everything.
"OH, I'm so sorry." He looked up and saw Joey.
"Dawson, Hi" She said hastily.
"I'm sorry Jo. I was in my own little world."
"It's ok Dawson. I'll live." He laughed. "What's so funny?"
"Well, it just amazes me how much has changed. There was a time when we didn't have to bump into each other to say hi. Or when you came in my window… and not the door… or when we were friends." He trailed off hoping she would see that was something he wanted. He had actually learned something from Pacey during it all. Patience. He didn't have it last time and he forced a decision. If he wanted her in his life he had to make it less obvious. Less desperate on his part, and he knew she would come back, in some way, on her own. They had too much history.
"I hope we are still friends Dawson." She said.
Dawson smiled… he knew what to say next… and he knew it was perfect… "Well, in the famous words of you, "You can't will a friendship into existence" can you Jo. You know where I am" he said it slowly and blatantly so she could take in the full meaning… and then he left. He walked away smiling. She couldn't see his smile, and he couldn't see the confusion in her face.
She watched him walk away and the weight of his words lay on her shoulders. She had said that to him, and it was the truth. But after all that happened how could she be his friend. It was hard enough walking up to the front door and climbing the stairs to his room… how could she climb that ladder. It held too many memories. He headed home and part of her wanted to catch up with him and tell him everything that happened this summer, tell him how she screwed things up with Pacey because she couldn't make the decision on her own, but she knew she couldn't. He feelings for Dawson were complicated, and she didn't want to cause him anymore pain. After he was out of sight she sighed. Would she ever get over Dawson? She didn't think she would. She loved him; she would always love him. Part of her wondered why being with him couldn't make her happy. Maybe things really do happen for a reason, and this time it would be as perfect as she had originally imagined. She turned around and standing behind her was Pacey. She wondered just how long he had been standing there.
"Pacey."
"Jo, I do still exist. Are you ever going to speak to me again?"
She shrugged. She really didn't know. He didn't realize that the decision to leave with him was the hardest decision of her life. After all that had happened in her life spontaneity wasn't really an option. She had lost both parents at a young age, and taking care of herself and her sister was a full time job, that wasn't exactly lucrative or even stable. Dawson had been her whole world. His movie nites, his ladder, his mom and dad, his house, his friendship, and finally even his love, had been her only stability. Her only constant. Falling for Pacey took all that away. How could she lose the only things she had to hold on to? She needed Dawson and his family. Not the same way she needed Pacey, but he didn't see it. He wanted her to be free of Dawson.
Pacey looked at her and knew… he would love her always. She didn't want to talk to him… he couldn't make her. He had to do what he had hope Dawson would do. He had to let her go. Once again he had to stand back and let her make her own decision, even though he was afraid she already had. He had been there long enough to hear Dawson, and know he would always love her… and he saw the pained expression on her face when he walked away. He hated this. When she still didn't speak he knew there was nothing left to say. He had fought for months before they left, and in the end all his fighting was worth nothing… this time he had to walk away and hope for the best. No grand gestures… no "ASK ME TO STAY'S".
"Bye Potter." Pacey kissed her on the head and walked away. What else could he do?
Joey watched Pacey walk away and she her heart sank. Why couldn't life just be simple again? The way it use to be before they had grown up. Dawson and his movies, Pacey and his banter. After she and Dawson started dating it scared her and she pulled away to find her self. First she thought it was with Jack, boy was she wrong there, then with A.J., and finally with Pacey. Though with Pacey she really believed she had. He seemed to complete her, and in a way her did, but without Dawson part of her would always feel empty. She knew she loved Pacey, and she knew she loved him enough to be fair. She had to let go. To not be selfish this time. This time is wasn't about her… it was about him, and he deserved more.
"See ya Whitter." She mumbled and walked away.
The Return of True Love
School was on the horizon and Dawson began to wonder when Joey and Pacey were coming back. He told himself he was over her, and he really believed it… until he drove by the B&B on his way home from the video store, and there she was. Outside talking… with Bessie. You could hear them from where he had stopped. Dawson watched as Bessie and Joey hugged and carried Alexander back into the house. He wanted to jump out of the car and run over and take her in his arms. He knew if he didn't leave now he would do exactly that. He gave her one last look and drove away.
Up in his room he took a look around. There was nothing at all to remind him of Joey, and yet… yet he couldn't forget. He wondered how long she would be back before she came to see him. If she came at all. School was two days away; she could avoid him, until they inevitably bump into each other in the halls, with the forced smiles and niceties. They would say hi and they were fine, then go on their separate ways. He couldn't handle that. Even now she knew him better then anyone… and he wanted her to be part of his life. He sat in silence on his bed… Jurassic Park rattling on the television when a sudden knock jolted. Standing before him, as beautiful as ever was Joey Potter.
"Hi."
She stood in the doorway uncomfortably. Her eyes frantically searching his to see if she was even welcome here.
"Hi." Dawson replied. Taken aback not only by her sudden appearance, but the fact that she used the front door.
"Hi."
She stood there chewing on her lower lip it that innocent way that had a habit of driving him crazy.
"I believe you already said that." Dawson strained to get the words out.
"Yeah. I did. I just wanted to let you know I was home… and…. Um, I'm gonna go."
He knew if he didn't try and salvage this friendship now, he might never, "No, stay. Sit…"
Joey walked slowly in the room and sat on the chair before speaking again. "What are you watching?"
No response from Dawson. He just stared at the screen. "I guess not much has changed huh. It's a Friday night and here you are Speilberg Movie, and all. "
"Why are you here Jo? It's been three months, and not even one word." He looked her straight in the eyes.
She fumbled nervously. "I know I'm probably the last person you want to see, but I did miss you Dawson."
"I wanted to know that you were ok. " Dawson commented.
"I'm good Dawson. How have you been?" She smiled glad he wanted to see her.
"Andie and I are working of movie, she's a really good writer, and we're planning on starting production in a few weeks, Jen and I went to the dive-in that reopened. Oh, and Jack, well, he's been a little busy with Holden."
"Holden?" She asked raising her eyebrow
"OH, Holden is his boyfriend. Andie and I were planning on taking out the boat and we invited Jack. When I pulled in for some gas, I figured I'd get a quick check up. Holden was the mechanic. Him and Jack hit it off immediately. They have pretty much been inseparable since then. Andie says he really nice."
"Wow. I guess some things have changed. Jen still torturing poor Henry, or did he finally give up?"
"Actually she went after him, and they have been together non stop since he got back from camp. Andie said when she saw them at the store they looked really happy…"
Dawson continued talking about the summer and Andie.
She couldn't help but notice that her name came up more often then anyone else. It bothered her. She had made the choice. She had hurt him. What did she expect, that is life would stop to wait for her?
"Joey?" Dawson pulled her out of her thoughts
"What?"
"I asked you how Pacey was.." The words came out, but they were strained.
"Pacey is…. Fine." She said. Trying to hide the truth from him. How could she tell him that things hadn't worked out? That three weeks into the trip the honeymoon faded and any reference made to Dawson caused huge arguments. She had made the mistake of telling Pacey that she had left after a conversation with Dawson. Pacey couldn't help but feel like Dawson had still won. That she still followed his wishes, because she hadn't chosen on her own, because it took Dawson telling her to go for her to go. No matter how she tried to let him know she wanted to make that decision, he still felt like second best. So she got off the boat after a month, and spent the summer working at a Marina to earn enough money to get home
Dawson looked into her eyes and knew something was wrong. He didn't know what, and to be honest he was glad he could still read her eyes, but he didn't want to know. He refused to get caught up in her again. The pregnant pause grew longer.
"Well, I guess I'll be on my way then." She said.
"I'll see you at school on Monday then."
"Bye Dawson." She turned and walked out the door and down the stairs. He waited until she was out the front door before responding.
"Bye Joey." Their senior year of High school was beginning. He only hoped things would get easier.
School started bright and early and he was ready to get back into things. Before classes he went to their spot. Every year he, Andie, Jack, Jen, Joey, & Pacey always sat at the same place. He wondered who would show. Just then he caught sight of Joey. She was walking towards the building, book bag in hand. As he watched she walked right past Pacey, who was standing at the bottom of the stairs, and continued up the steps. He watched her for a second then shook his head and walked off.
He headed to classes and made a mental note to talk to Joey later.
Finally reaching 5th period he walked into English class and took one of the two empty seats left. He was looking at the door when Pacey walked in. He studied the room and found the empty seat, then realized who it was next to and he went pale. Pacey slowly walked over and took the seat next to Dawson.
"Hey man." Pacey mumbled at the bell rang.
Dawson just looked at him. He had lost the gift of speech. Thankfully the teacher took over and class began. It didn't last nearly long enough and soon the bell was ringing. Dawson's day was done he had no sixth period.
"Are you ever going to talk to me again?"
Dawson stopped packing his bag and looked at Pacey, "Well, I wasn't exactly sure what to say. Hey Pace didn't seem quite right."
"A simple no Pacey I don't plan on talking to you again would have sufficed." With this Pacey grabbed his backpack and walked out of the room.
Dawson watched him go, then finished packing his bag and left. When he exited the door he found Pacey waiting for him.
"Dawson, how many times can I say I'm sorry. I didn't want to hurt you." Pacey pleaded.
"I know Pace," Dawson said.
They stood there in uncomfortable silence until Pacey finally sighed and said a goodbye patting Dawson on the shoulder as he left.
After Pacey left Dawson was again adamant about finding Joey, but since he was unaware of her schedule he decided to head home and see what he could do to get ready for production on the new movie. On the way to the parking lot he was lost in thought over her. It really bothered him. Why did he have such a hard time getting over her? She treated him like crap… repeatedly… left him to find herself and never came back…He should have hated her and yet he couldn't. He was distracted when he smacked into someone and dropped everything.
"OH, I'm so sorry." He looked up and saw Joey.
"Dawson, Hi" She said hastily.
"I'm sorry Jo. I was in my own little world."
"It's ok Dawson. I'll live." He laughed. "What's so funny?"
"Well, it just amazes me how much has changed. There was a time when we didn't have to bump into each other to say hi. Or when you came in my window… and not the door… or when we were friends." He trailed off hoping she would see that was something he wanted. He had actually learned something from Pacey during it all. Patience. He didn't have it last time and he forced a decision. If he wanted her in his life he had to make it less obvious. Less desperate on his part, and he knew she would come back, in some way, on her own. They had too much history.
"I hope we are still friends Dawson." She said.
Dawson smiled… he knew what to say next… and he knew it was perfect… "Well, in the famous words of you, "You can't will a friendship into existence" can you Jo. You know where I am" he said it slowly and blatantly so she could take in the full meaning… and then he left. He walked away smiling. She couldn't see his smile, and he couldn't see the confusion in her face.
She watched him walk away and the weight of his words lay on her shoulders. She had said that to him, and it was the truth. But after all that happened how could she be his friend. It was hard enough walking up to the front door and climbing the stairs to his room… how could she climb that ladder. It held too many memories. He headed home and part of her wanted to catch up with him and tell him everything that happened this summer, tell him how she screwed things up with Pacey because she couldn't make the decision on her own, but she knew she couldn't. He feelings for Dawson were complicated, and she didn't want to cause him anymore pain. After he was out of sight she sighed. Would she ever get over Dawson? She didn't think she would. She loved him; she would always love him. Part of her wondered why being with him couldn't make her happy. Maybe things really do happen for a reason, and this time it would be as perfect as she had originally imagined. She turned around and standing behind her was Pacey. She wondered just how long he had been standing there.
"Pacey."
"Jo, I do still exist. Are you ever going to speak to me again?"
She shrugged. She really didn't know. He didn't realize that the decision to leave with him was the hardest decision of her life. After all that had happened in her life spontaneity wasn't really an option. She had lost both parents at a young age, and taking care of herself and her sister was a full time job, that wasn't exactly lucrative or even stable. Dawson had been her whole world. His movie nites, his ladder, his mom and dad, his house, his friendship, and finally even his love, had been her only stability. Her only constant. Falling for Pacey took all that away. How could she lose the only things she had to hold on to? She needed Dawson and his family. Not the same way she needed Pacey, but he didn't see it. He wanted her to be free of Dawson.
Pacey looked at her and knew… he would love her always. She didn't want to talk to him… he couldn't make her. He had to do what he had hope Dawson would do. He had to let her go. Once again he had to stand back and let her make her own decision, even though he was afraid she already had. He had been there long enough to hear Dawson, and know he would always love her… and he saw the pained expression on her face when he walked away. He hated this. When she still didn't speak he knew there was nothing left to say. He had fought for months before they left, and in the end all his fighting was worth nothing… this time he had to walk away and hope for the best. No grand gestures… no "ASK ME TO STAY'S".
"Bye Potter." Pacey kissed her on the head and walked away. What else could he do?
Joey watched Pacey walk away and she her heart sank. Why couldn't life just be simple again? The way it use to be before they had grown up. Dawson and his movies, Pacey and his banter. After she and Dawson started dating it scared her and she pulled away to find her self. First she thought it was with Jack, boy was she wrong there, then with A.J., and finally with Pacey. Though with Pacey she really believed she had. He seemed to complete her, and in a way her did, but without Dawson part of her would always feel empty. She knew she loved Pacey, and she knew she loved him enough to be fair. She had to let go. To not be selfish this time. This time is wasn't about her… it was about him, and he deserved more.
"See ya Whitter." She mumbled and walked away.
