Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy 9, or The Weakest Link. Maybe I
would make more money if I did, but unfortunately, I don't, so...

A/N: If you haven't read the original FF9: The Weakest Link, you might
want to read that first, since I might be making references to that.

Behind the set...

CLOUD TRIBAL: Hello peoples! Time to get ready to start!

CID: You again? Can't we just stop this madness?

CLOUD TRIBAL: Well, I don't know. Let me think. NO!

CID: Geez, don't get so messed up!

CLOUD TRIBAL: ...

EIKO: Hey I know how to make this funny!

CLOUD TRIBAL: Well?

EIKO: Let's all refer to each other in PIG LATIN!

CLOUD TRIBAL: ...

EIKO: So, Loudcay Ribaltay, what's in store for this chapter?

LOUDCAY RIBALTAY...I mean CLOUD TRIBAL: I will not degrade myself to this level...

EIKO: Oh, come on! You've got to have some fun!

CLOUD TRIBAL: I did! I killed Amarant last chapter!

EIKO: Oh, so you did kill Marantaay?

CLOUD TRIBAL: Yeah, so?

NECRON: I wanted to kill Marantaay...

BLACK MAGE: KILL!

CID: Shut up, Lackbay Agemay.

CLOUD TRIBAL: Can we stop this now?

NECRON: You shut up Idcay, you old coot!

CID: YOu want some of me, Ecronnay?

(Cid and Necron proceed to beat the living itshay out of each other)

CLOUD TRIBAL: Ummmm...this didn't add any value to the fanfic

EIKO: C'mon Teinersay join in!

STEINER: What witchcraft language is this anyway?

CLOUD TRIBAL: STOP. RIGHT. NOW.

(CT drags them all kicking and screaming onto the set)



ANNE: Welcome back to "The Weakest Link"!

AUDIENCE: YAY!

ANNE: Necron, you go first. The category is any Squaresoft game. Start the clock at 2:10!

ANNE: Necron, who was the mother of the hero in Secret of Mana?

NECRON: The Mana Tree!

ANNE: Correct! Steiner, who did not join your party in Super Mario RPG: Bowser or Luigi?

STEINER: ZZZZZZZZZZZZZ...what?

ANNE: No, the answer is Luigi. Eiko, who is the villain who ends up joining your party in Chrono Trigger?

EIKO: ...Magus?

ANNE: Correct! Garland, what artifact created The Underworld in Legend of Mana?

GARLAND: Trembling Spoon?

ANNE: Correct! Black Mage, what does Serge have a dream of doing to Kid?

BLACK MAGE: KILL!

ANNE: Correct!

CID: Funny, I would have said sneaking into her house at night and getting some...

CLOUD TRIBAL: DO NOT SAY ANOTHER WORD ALONG THAT SUBJECT LINE!

CID: What? What did I do?

CLOUD TRIBAL: ...Pervert...

ANNE: Pervert...I mean Cid, who was the first boss of Chrono Trigger?

CID: I believe it was something called Yakra.

ANNE: Correct! Necron, what Square game has a spiky haired kid with two magical swords?

NECRON: That was Brave Fencer Musashi.

ANNE: That is correct! Steiner...

STEINER: Bank! (Savings: 25,000 gil)

ANNE: ...Which Final Fantasy games were released for PC?

STEINER: ...Final Fantasies 7 and 9?

ANNE: Noooo...

STEINER: WHAT! You're telling me the Square peoples didn't release OUR game!

ANNE: ...

STEINER: ...

ANNE: ...

STEINER: ...

ANNE: ...

STEINER: ...

ANNE: Eiko, wh-

BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!

ANNE: I can't complete the question.

ANNE: And in this round you managed to bank a pitiful 25,000 gil!

EIKO: Is it worth less than CHocobo dung?

ANNE: ...Maybe.

EIKO: Mog dung?

ANNE: ...

EIKO: Dang.

ANNE: So vote!

(They vote...)

ANNE: Let's see who gets kicked off.

STEINER: ...Cid.

EIKO: Steiner.

GARLAND: ...Steiner.

BLACK MAGE: KILL!

CID: ...Steiner.

NECRON: Cid.

ANNE: Well, I see. Steiner, why Cid?

STEINER: He's a womanizer!

CID: What are you saying?

STEIENR: You know what I'm saying.

CID: Rusty freak...

STEINER: WHAT!

CID: Ummm...

ANNE: Steiner, just get out of here.

(Steiner walks off the set to the sound of his rusty armor)

Behind the set...

STEINER: No...how did I lose? WHAT DID I DO WRONG!!!

STEINER: I think Cid will leave next, since he will probably touch Anne's rear and say
something like "Ooh, soft".

Back to the set...

ANNE: Well, stay tuned for more humor!

EIKO: Bu-bye, y'all. See y'all around next time!

ALL: ...