Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy 9, or The Weakest Link. Maybe I
would make more money if I did, but unfortunately, I don't, so...

A/N: If you haven't read the original FF9: The Weakest Link, you might
want to read that first, since I might be making references to that.

Behind the set...

NECRON: Cid's gone...

CID: No, I'm not!

GARLAND: But CT killed you!

CLOUD TRIBAL: ...

CID: I'm back and better than ever!

EIKO: NEW AND IMPROVED! NEW AND IMPROVED!

CLOUD TRIBAL: ...(whistles)

CID: Eh?

(Suddenly the Prima Vista flies in and hits Cid, thus killing him)

NECRON: Oh my God! They killed Cid!

EIKO: You sons of a biscuit!

GARLAND: DEMON VEHICLE! DIE! (casts Flare)

(Prima Vista goes up in smoke)

BAKU: MY SHIP!! (dies)

CLOUD TRIBAL: TWO! TWO! TWO FOR THE PRICE OF ONE!

HILDA: ...Waaaaaaaaah!

EIKO: Huh?

HILDA: Cid's...dead! I realized I was wrong to leave him so I got on the Prima Vista,
but Baku didn't want me to, so he...he turned him into roadkill!

EIKO: But...an airship hit him, so shouldn't it be airkill?

CLOUD TRIBAL: ...

HILDA: Now my life has no meaning!!!

CLOUD TRIBAL: ...

HILDA: Goodbye cruel Gaia!

(Hilda jumps into the flaming Prima Vista)

EIKO: That's sad...but now they're united in death...just like Romeo and Juliet...

CLOUD TRIBAL: ...

GARLAND: Why so silent today, CT?

CLOUD TRIBAL: ..If Cid came back, then...

AMARANT: Hiya!

CLOUD TRIBAL: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

AMARANT: Huh?

CLOUD TRIBAL: STAY DEAD FOR ONCE!

AMARANT: Not again! (dies)

CLOUD TRIBAL: Phew.

GARLAND: Is it just me or is this REALLY insane?

CLOUD TRIBAL: Too bad. Show time!

ALL: NO!



ANNE: Welcome back to "The Weakest Link"!

AUDIENCE: ...Yay?

ANNE: Eiko, once again we start with you. 1:50 on the clock.

GARLAND: Wait! What's the category?

ANNE: How about whatever I want?

GARLAND: (sweatdrop)

ANNE: Start the clock. Eiko, why does a bird have wings?

EIKO: (sweatdrop) Because.

ANNE: Yes?

EIKO: Because!

ANNE: ...Correct. Garland, how many colors are in a rainbow?

GARLAND: ...Uh...let's see...1,2,3...hmmm, I guess....7?

ANNE: Is that a question or a statement?

GARLAND: STOP TRYING TO CONFUSE ME! But it's a statement...I think.

ANNE: ...Correct. Black Mage, what is the meaning of existence?

BLACK MAGE: KILL!

CLOUD TRIBAL: Awww...I was gonna say that...

ANNE: Ummm...can't you say anything else?

NECRON: No, he can't. He never will. Now he got one wrong and we'll get rid of him!

BLACK MAGE: ...

ALL: ...

BLACK MAGE: ...Well, yes I actually can.

NECRON: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

BLACK MAGE: Well really people. I did get a bachelor's degree from Yale, you know.

ANNE: Then...you can answer the question!

BLACK MAGE: Yes, actually I can.

ANNE: Well I'll ask again...what is the meaning of exsitence?

BLACK MAGE: To play wonderfully entertaining Square products then top it off with
high quality NBC programming.

ANNE:....Sure, correct.

(Black Mage recieves money from NBC and Square)

ANNE: Necron, name The Three Stooges.

NECRON: Moe, Larry,and Curly....my idols!

ANNE: (sweatdrop)...Correct. Eiko, what is the almighty god of inspiration?

EIKO: Mr. Pibb!

CLOUD TRIBAL: I need some about now...

ANNE: Garland, where is a place to unleash your imagination and free your soul?

GARLAND: A good bar.

ANNE: ...

GARLAND: I mean FanFiction.Net!

ANNE: ...

GARLAND: Really!

ANNE: Fine. Correct. Black Mage, if I had 7,000 apples and I ate 6,000, what do I have?

BLACK MAGE: You're going to have one heck of a crap!

ANNE: ...

BLACK MAGE: A lifetime membership to Jenny Craig?

ANNE: ...

BLACK MAGE: ...(sigh)...1,000 apples...

ANNE: Correct! Necron...

NECRON: BANK! (Savings: 75,000 gil)

BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!

ANNE: Ummm...vote!

(They vote...)

ANNE: And...let's see who leaves!

EIKO: Black Mage.

GARLAND: Eiko.

BLACK MAGE: KILL!...I mean, err...Eiko!

NECRON: ...Eiko.

ANNE: Well then. Garland, why did you vote for Eiko?

GARLAND: She's...WEIRD!

EIKO: What!

GARLAND: You're the one who did that Pig Latin thing and I hated that.

CLOUD TRIBAL: So did I.

ANNE: Well then Eiko, you are the Weakest Link.

ANNE: Goodbye!

EIKO: Oodbyegay!

(Eiko skips off stage)

Behind the set...

EIKO: Who cares about money anyway? I just was doing this on a dare.

MOG: Kupo!

EIKO: Ha, now it's my turn to dare you, Mog!

MOG: Kupoooooooooooooo...

Back on the set...

ANNE: Well, stay tuned!

CLOUD TRIBAL: Don't touch that hyperlink!

GARLAND: Please?

A/N: First of all, thanks to my friend PSX Master, since he helped me write this chapter.
I'm sadly suffering from writer's blcok, which is currently irrevocable. I don't know
when I'll get enough inspiration to write another chapter, but please bear with me.