Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy 9, Chrono Cross, Final Fantasy 8, ANY game
from Squaresoft, or The Weakest Link. Maybe I would make more money if I did, but
unfortunately, I don't, so...

Author's Note: If you haven't read the original...ah, screw it, you've
either read it or you haven't read it and by now nothing I say will make
you change your mind.

Behind the set...

CLOUD TRIBAL: Wow, I've been gone for so long.

CLOUD TRIBAL: I wonder what the remaining cast is up to?

CLOUD TRIBAL: Well, I'm going to find out.

(Opens door)

(Loud music)

NECRON: Shake, shake, shake. Shake, shake, shake! Shake yo booty.
Shake yo boo-tay!

CLOUD TRIBAL: ...

ANNE: All your base are belong to us!

CLOUD TRIBAL: ...Ummmm...What the heck happened?

BLACK MAGE: Don't look at me!

CLOUD TRIBAL: What...happened?

BLACK MAGE: Well, you were gone for so long, we ordered 10 kegs of pure
alcohol from Stiltzkin...

CLOUD TRIBAL: Alright...

NECRON: Burn, baby, burn. Disco inferno!

GARLAND: I! Am! SAILOR MOON! And in the name of the moon...I'll punish you!

CLOUD TRIBAL: Well, you're going to "sail" right out onto the set.

(CT uses Soberifier)

ANNE: Huh?

NECRON: Wha?

GARLAND: Where am I?

CLOUD TRIBAL: You're out on the set. Right now.

NECRON: YOU!

(CT pushes them all onto the set)



ANNE: And welcome back...hic!...to the "Weakest Link"!

AUDIENCE: ...Finally...

ANNE: Let's see...who was the strongest link from last round?

NECRON: Ummmmmmmm...me!

ANNE: Ummmmmmmm...are you sure?

NECRON: Uhhh...heh heh...yeah!

ANNE: Ooooooookay...start the clock at...what the?

(The entire cast of Final Fantasy 8 runs onto the set and sings Eyes on Me
before disappearing)

ALL: (sweatdrop)

ANNE: Uh...start the clock at 1:40?

GARLAND: W-wait! What's the category?

ANNE: ...Ummm...Squaresoft?

NECRON: Didn't we already do that?

ANNE: DANGIT, we'll do it again!

NECRON: ...Yes, ma'am.

ANNE: Now, start the clock at 1:40 already!

ANNE: Necron, in Legend of Mana, you can be one of two characters, a girl or a
what?

NECRON: (sweatdrop) Uhhhh...a boy?

ANNE: Correct! Garland, in Threads of Fate, you can be one of two characters,
a boy or a what?

GARLAND: Girl?

ANNE: Correct! Black Mage, name the six colors of elements in Chrono Cross.

BLACK MAGE: Yellow, red, green, blue, black, white...

CLOUD TRIBAL: CHRONO CROSS!

(Funky chimes play as the TIME DEVOURER (which appeared out of nowhere) explodes)

ANNE: (sweatdrop) Correct. Necron, who is the main character in Final Fantasy 10?

NECRON: Some dorkwad named Tidus?

ANNE: Correct, but...why is he a dorkwad?

NECRON: Oh come on. He uses a sword made of WATER, for crying out loud.

CLOUD TRIBAL: Better hope he doesn't have to go to a cold place...

NECRON: Heh heh.

ANNE: Garland, name 3 songs that have lyrics from Square games.

GARLAND: Eyes on Me, Melodies of Life, and...One Winged Angel.

ANNE: Yes, yes...and yes. Correct. Black Mage...

BLACK MAGE: Oh, bank it all! (Savings: 25,000 gil)

ANNE: What two games were re-released as Final Fantasy Chronicles?

BLACK MAGE: Final Fantasy 4 and...Final Fantasy 3?

ANNE: Oops! Wrongo! The answer is Final Fantasy 4 and Chrono Trigger.

BLACK MAGE: Bu-but THAT'S NOT EVEN A FINAL FANTASY GAME!

ANNE: So? Go sue Square.

BLACK MAGE: Hmmm...maybe I shall...

ANNE: (sweatdrop)

(HIRONOBU SAKAGUCHI (did I spell that right?) stands up)

SAKAGUCHI: You can't sue us!

NECRON: AH! It's...it's HIM...

CLOUD TRIBAL: Huh?

GARLAND: He is our god...

SAKAGUCHI: I BROUGHT YOU INTO THIS WORLD AND I CAN REMOVE YOU!

CLOUD TRIBAL: Oh, stuff it.

(CT blows up SAKAGUCHI's head)

ALL: (gasp) WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!!!!

CLOUD TRIBAL: ...What?

ALL: YOU HAVE KILLED LORD SAKAGUCHI!

CLOUD TRIBAL: ...So?

NECRON: Never again will Square...ever be the same!

CLOUD TRIBAL: Be quiet. I'll bring him back later if you're that broken up over it.

GARLAND: Well...oh, fine.

ANNE: Well, we could continue the round, but...

BLACK MAGE: But what?

ANNE: That just took up the rest of the time!

ALL: ...

ANNE: So, in this round, you managed to bank 25,000 gil.
And guess what? One of you has to leave! So vote now!

(They vote...)

ANNE: Time is up. Let's see who has to leave.

NECRON: ...Black Mage.

GARLAND: Black Mage.

BLACK MAGE: Necron.

ANNE: Well, there's the results. Garland, why Black Mage?

GARLAND: HE CAUSED LORD SAKAGUCHI'S DEATH!

ANNE: (sweatdrop) Okay. Necron, why'd you vote for Black Mage?

NECRON: He...he freaks me out, okay!

ANNE: Wha?

NECRON: Always...always talkin' and carrying on like he does it all the time...Why
couldn't he just say 'kill'?...GET HIM AWAY FROM ME, MAN!

ANNE: Alright, alright! Black Mage, with two votes, you are the Weakest Link.

ANNE: Goodbye!

(BLACK MAGE walks off the set)

(Behind the set...)

BLACK MAGE: (crying) I'm not a freak...lots of other bl-black mages...t-talk!
There's V-Vivi, a-and all the black m-m-mages in the vill-village, and...(sobs)

(Back to the set...)

CLOUD TRIBAL: Necron, that was rude.

NECRON: So what are you going to do? You can't kill me.

CLOUD TRIBAL: You'd be surprised.

NECRON: (sweatdrop)

ANNE: Join us again (hopefully) for the continuation of the "Weakest Link"!

AUDIENCE: Yay!

A/N: Sorry for the long delay in posting this. Chapter Seven will hopefully be up
much faster. So give me your opinions in your reviews!