Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy 9, Chrono Cross, Final Fantasy 8, ANY game
from Squaresoft, or The Weakest Link. Maybe I would make more money if I did, but
unfortunately, I don't, so...
Author's Note: If you haven't read the original...ah, screw it, you've
either read it or you haven't read it and by now nothing I say will make
you change your mind.
Behind the set...
CLOUD TRIBAL: Wow, I've been gone for so long.
CLOUD TRIBAL: I wonder what the remaining cast is up to?
CLOUD TRIBAL: Well, I'm going to find out.
(Opens door)
(Loud music)
NECRON: Shake, shake, shake. Shake, shake, shake! Shake yo booty.
Shake yo boo-tay!
CLOUD TRIBAL: ...
ANNE: All your base are belong to us!
CLOUD TRIBAL: ...Ummmm...What the heck happened?
BLACK MAGE: Don't look at me!
CLOUD TRIBAL: What...happened?
BLACK MAGE: Well, you were gone for so long, we ordered 10 kegs of pure
alcohol from Stiltzkin...
CLOUD TRIBAL: Alright...
NECRON: Burn, baby, burn. Disco inferno!
GARLAND: I! Am! SAILOR MOON! And in the name of the moon...I'll punish you!
CLOUD TRIBAL: Well, you're going to "sail" right out onto the set.
(CT uses Soberifier)
ANNE: Huh?
NECRON: Wha?
GARLAND: Where am I?
CLOUD TRIBAL: You're out on the set. Right now.
NECRON: YOU!
(CT pushes them all onto the set)
ANNE: And welcome back...hic!...to the "Weakest Link"!
AUDIENCE: ...Finally...
ANNE: Let's see...who was the strongest link from last round?
NECRON: Ummmmmmmm...me!
ANNE: Ummmmmmmm...are you sure?
NECRON: Uhhh...heh heh...yeah!
ANNE: Ooooooookay...start the clock at...what the?
(The entire cast of Final Fantasy 8 runs onto the set and sings Eyes on Me
before disappearing)
ALL: (sweatdrop)
ANNE: Uh...start the clock at 1:40?
GARLAND: W-wait! What's the category?
ANNE: ...Ummm...Squaresoft?
NECRON: Didn't we already do that?
ANNE: DANGIT, we'll do it again!
NECRON: ...Yes, ma'am.
ANNE: Now, start the clock at 1:40 already!
ANNE: Necron, in Legend of Mana, you can be one of two characters, a girl or a
what?
NECRON: (sweatdrop) Uhhhh...a boy?
ANNE: Correct! Garland, in Threads of Fate, you can be one of two characters,
a boy or a what?
GARLAND: Girl?
ANNE: Correct! Black Mage, name the six colors of elements in Chrono Cross.
BLACK MAGE: Yellow, red, green, blue, black, white...
CLOUD TRIBAL: CHRONO CROSS!
(Funky chimes play as the TIME DEVOURER (which appeared out of nowhere) explodes)
ANNE: (sweatdrop) Correct. Necron, who is the main character in Final Fantasy 10?
NECRON: Some dorkwad named Tidus?
ANNE: Correct, but...why is he a dorkwad?
NECRON: Oh come on. He uses a sword made of WATER, for crying out loud.
CLOUD TRIBAL: Better hope he doesn't have to go to a cold place...
NECRON: Heh heh.
ANNE: Garland, name 3 songs that have lyrics from Square games.
GARLAND: Eyes on Me, Melodies of Life, and...One Winged Angel.
ANNE: Yes, yes...and yes. Correct. Black Mage...
BLACK MAGE: Oh, bank it all! (Savings: 25,000 gil)
ANNE: What two games were re-released as Final Fantasy Chronicles?
BLACK MAGE: Final Fantasy 4 and...Final Fantasy 3?
ANNE: Oops! Wrongo! The answer is Final Fantasy 4 and Chrono Trigger.
BLACK MAGE: Bu-but THAT'S NOT EVEN A FINAL FANTASY GAME!
ANNE: So? Go sue Square.
BLACK MAGE: Hmmm...maybe I shall...
ANNE: (sweatdrop)
(HIRONOBU SAKAGUCHI (did I spell that right?) stands up)
SAKAGUCHI: You can't sue us!
NECRON: AH! It's...it's HIM...
CLOUD TRIBAL: Huh?
GARLAND: He is our god...
SAKAGUCHI: I BROUGHT YOU INTO THIS WORLD AND I CAN REMOVE YOU!
CLOUD TRIBAL: Oh, stuff it.
(CT blows up SAKAGUCHI's head)
ALL: (gasp) WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!!!!
CLOUD TRIBAL: ...What?
ALL: YOU HAVE KILLED LORD SAKAGUCHI!
CLOUD TRIBAL: ...So?
NECRON: Never again will Square...ever be the same!
CLOUD TRIBAL: Be quiet. I'll bring him back later if you're that broken up over it.
GARLAND: Well...oh, fine.
ANNE: Well, we could continue the round, but...
BLACK MAGE: But what?
ANNE: That just took up the rest of the time!
ALL: ...
ANNE: So, in this round, you managed to bank 25,000 gil.
And guess what? One of you has to leave! So vote now!
(They vote...)
ANNE: Time is up. Let's see who has to leave.
NECRON: ...Black Mage.
GARLAND: Black Mage.
BLACK MAGE: Necron.
ANNE: Well, there's the results. Garland, why Black Mage?
GARLAND: HE CAUSED LORD SAKAGUCHI'S DEATH!
ANNE: (sweatdrop) Okay. Necron, why'd you vote for Black Mage?
NECRON: He...he freaks me out, okay!
ANNE: Wha?
NECRON: Always...always talkin' and carrying on like he does it all the time...Why
couldn't he just say 'kill'?...GET HIM AWAY FROM ME, MAN!
ANNE: Alright, alright! Black Mage, with two votes, you are the Weakest Link.
ANNE: Goodbye!
(BLACK MAGE walks off the set)
(Behind the set...)
BLACK MAGE: (crying) I'm not a freak...lots of other bl-black mages...t-talk!
There's V-Vivi, a-and all the black m-m-mages in the vill-village, and...(sobs)
(Back to the set...)
CLOUD TRIBAL: Necron, that was rude.
NECRON: So what are you going to do? You can't kill me.
CLOUD TRIBAL: You'd be surprised.
NECRON: (sweatdrop)
ANNE: Join us again (hopefully) for the continuation of the "Weakest Link"!
AUDIENCE: Yay!
A/N: Sorry for the long delay in posting this. Chapter Seven will hopefully be up
much faster. So give me your opinions in your reviews!
from Squaresoft, or The Weakest Link. Maybe I would make more money if I did, but
unfortunately, I don't, so...
Author's Note: If you haven't read the original...ah, screw it, you've
either read it or you haven't read it and by now nothing I say will make
you change your mind.
Behind the set...
CLOUD TRIBAL: Wow, I've been gone for so long.
CLOUD TRIBAL: I wonder what the remaining cast is up to?
CLOUD TRIBAL: Well, I'm going to find out.
(Opens door)
(Loud music)
NECRON: Shake, shake, shake. Shake, shake, shake! Shake yo booty.
Shake yo boo-tay!
CLOUD TRIBAL: ...
ANNE: All your base are belong to us!
CLOUD TRIBAL: ...Ummmm...What the heck happened?
BLACK MAGE: Don't look at me!
CLOUD TRIBAL: What...happened?
BLACK MAGE: Well, you were gone for so long, we ordered 10 kegs of pure
alcohol from Stiltzkin...
CLOUD TRIBAL: Alright...
NECRON: Burn, baby, burn. Disco inferno!
GARLAND: I! Am! SAILOR MOON! And in the name of the moon...I'll punish you!
CLOUD TRIBAL: Well, you're going to "sail" right out onto the set.
(CT uses Soberifier)
ANNE: Huh?
NECRON: Wha?
GARLAND: Where am I?
CLOUD TRIBAL: You're out on the set. Right now.
NECRON: YOU!
(CT pushes them all onto the set)
ANNE: And welcome back...hic!...to the "Weakest Link"!
AUDIENCE: ...Finally...
ANNE: Let's see...who was the strongest link from last round?
NECRON: Ummmmmmmm...me!
ANNE: Ummmmmmmm...are you sure?
NECRON: Uhhh...heh heh...yeah!
ANNE: Ooooooookay...start the clock at...what the?
(The entire cast of Final Fantasy 8 runs onto the set and sings Eyes on Me
before disappearing)
ALL: (sweatdrop)
ANNE: Uh...start the clock at 1:40?
GARLAND: W-wait! What's the category?
ANNE: ...Ummm...Squaresoft?
NECRON: Didn't we already do that?
ANNE: DANGIT, we'll do it again!
NECRON: ...Yes, ma'am.
ANNE: Now, start the clock at 1:40 already!
ANNE: Necron, in Legend of Mana, you can be one of two characters, a girl or a
what?
NECRON: (sweatdrop) Uhhhh...a boy?
ANNE: Correct! Garland, in Threads of Fate, you can be one of two characters,
a boy or a what?
GARLAND: Girl?
ANNE: Correct! Black Mage, name the six colors of elements in Chrono Cross.
BLACK MAGE: Yellow, red, green, blue, black, white...
CLOUD TRIBAL: CHRONO CROSS!
(Funky chimes play as the TIME DEVOURER (which appeared out of nowhere) explodes)
ANNE: (sweatdrop) Correct. Necron, who is the main character in Final Fantasy 10?
NECRON: Some dorkwad named Tidus?
ANNE: Correct, but...why is he a dorkwad?
NECRON: Oh come on. He uses a sword made of WATER, for crying out loud.
CLOUD TRIBAL: Better hope he doesn't have to go to a cold place...
NECRON: Heh heh.
ANNE: Garland, name 3 songs that have lyrics from Square games.
GARLAND: Eyes on Me, Melodies of Life, and...One Winged Angel.
ANNE: Yes, yes...and yes. Correct. Black Mage...
BLACK MAGE: Oh, bank it all! (Savings: 25,000 gil)
ANNE: What two games were re-released as Final Fantasy Chronicles?
BLACK MAGE: Final Fantasy 4 and...Final Fantasy 3?
ANNE: Oops! Wrongo! The answer is Final Fantasy 4 and Chrono Trigger.
BLACK MAGE: Bu-but THAT'S NOT EVEN A FINAL FANTASY GAME!
ANNE: So? Go sue Square.
BLACK MAGE: Hmmm...maybe I shall...
ANNE: (sweatdrop)
(HIRONOBU SAKAGUCHI (did I spell that right?) stands up)
SAKAGUCHI: You can't sue us!
NECRON: AH! It's...it's HIM...
CLOUD TRIBAL: Huh?
GARLAND: He is our god...
SAKAGUCHI: I BROUGHT YOU INTO THIS WORLD AND I CAN REMOVE YOU!
CLOUD TRIBAL: Oh, stuff it.
(CT blows up SAKAGUCHI's head)
ALL: (gasp) WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!!!!
CLOUD TRIBAL: ...What?
ALL: YOU HAVE KILLED LORD SAKAGUCHI!
CLOUD TRIBAL: ...So?
NECRON: Never again will Square...ever be the same!
CLOUD TRIBAL: Be quiet. I'll bring him back later if you're that broken up over it.
GARLAND: Well...oh, fine.
ANNE: Well, we could continue the round, but...
BLACK MAGE: But what?
ANNE: That just took up the rest of the time!
ALL: ...
ANNE: So, in this round, you managed to bank 25,000 gil.
And guess what? One of you has to leave! So vote now!
(They vote...)
ANNE: Time is up. Let's see who has to leave.
NECRON: ...Black Mage.
GARLAND: Black Mage.
BLACK MAGE: Necron.
ANNE: Well, there's the results. Garland, why Black Mage?
GARLAND: HE CAUSED LORD SAKAGUCHI'S DEATH!
ANNE: (sweatdrop) Okay. Necron, why'd you vote for Black Mage?
NECRON: He...he freaks me out, okay!
ANNE: Wha?
NECRON: Always...always talkin' and carrying on like he does it all the time...Why
couldn't he just say 'kill'?...GET HIM AWAY FROM ME, MAN!
ANNE: Alright, alright! Black Mage, with two votes, you are the Weakest Link.
ANNE: Goodbye!
(BLACK MAGE walks off the set)
(Behind the set...)
BLACK MAGE: (crying) I'm not a freak...lots of other bl-black mages...t-talk!
There's V-Vivi, a-and all the black m-m-mages in the vill-village, and...(sobs)
(Back to the set...)
CLOUD TRIBAL: Necron, that was rude.
NECRON: So what are you going to do? You can't kill me.
CLOUD TRIBAL: You'd be surprised.
NECRON: (sweatdrop)
ANNE: Join us again (hopefully) for the continuation of the "Weakest Link"!
AUDIENCE: Yay!
A/N: Sorry for the long delay in posting this. Chapter Seven will hopefully be up
much faster. So give me your opinions in your reviews!
