Title: Mary Sue the Vampire Slayer
Author: --Starbuck--
Summary: Fourth in the Mary Sue Series!
Genre: Humor/Parody
Rating: PG
A/N: Coming soon...Mary Sue the Pokemon Master
==XxXxX==
Mary Sue drove into Sunnydale. She had expertly painted the windows black so no one could see her. She checked to make sure she had her stakes, which were all perfectly cut and perfectly sharp and perfect.
Mary Sue had a perfect figure, perfect blonde hair, perfect blue eyes, perfect feet, and a perfect face. In short, Mary Sue was perfect.
Mary Sue stopped at the cemetary, where she found Buffy and Spike walking together. She stopped the car and jumped out, stake ready.
"BUFFY! WATCH OUT! HE'S A VAMPIRE!" Mary Sue shouted, waving her arms perfectly and frantically.
"Bloody 'ell--?" Spike said, confused. Then he went all demonlike and attacked Mary Sue.
"Spike!" Buffy yelled. "You can't harm people, remember? They put that chip in your head!"
Spike stood up, his face going back to normal. "Wha? Oh yeah...right..."
"What's your problem?!" Buffy screamed at Mary Sue.
"Well, I'm a slayer, you're a slayer, and he's a vampire--"
"Woah, woah, woah, since when do Mary Sues become slayers?" Spike asked angrily.
"Since the beginning of fanfiction, erm, I didn't catch your name. I thought I should know it since I can't slay you," she said, perfectly regaining her perfect composure.
"It's Mr. William to you!" Spike snarled.
"Ok, Mr. William," she said perfectly, "Mary Sues are the perfect character. My brother, Gary Stu, is the perfectly reckless male counterpart. You can't have a good story without us, you know." She said all of this perfectly proudly.
Then Buffy got an idea. She took Spike by the arm and led him away. "Stay there," she said sweetly at Mary Sue, who stood perfectly still.
"Spike, I don't think this Mary Sue is a human. I'm sure Willow could tell you she's not, she knows all about that stuff I think...anyway, kill her, and then we can go." Buffy said this not perfectly, for she was perfectly NOT a Mary Sue, and was proud of it.
Spike walked back with Buffy, his face all demonic. Then he lunged at Mary Sue, who gave a perfect scream of perfect fright. Spike began to drink her blood, then spit it out.
"Bloody bleedin hell! It tastes too perfect!" He spat it on Mary Sue's face, and then he and Buffy, arm-in-arm, walked off into the night...Another Mary Sue dead!
==XxXxX==
*sniff* I wanna thank ALL you guys who have been reviewing my fics! =) You've made all my days! Nice to be back writing fics again!
Coming up next (perhaps one of the most common of all...) Mary Sue the Pokemon Master!
(BTW, I wanna thank Pokemon, because it got me into fanfiction a few years ago in the first place! Heehee!)
Author: --Starbuck--
Summary: Fourth in the Mary Sue Series!
Genre: Humor/Parody
Rating: PG
A/N: Coming soon...Mary Sue the Pokemon Master
==XxXxX==
Mary Sue drove into Sunnydale. She had expertly painted the windows black so no one could see her. She checked to make sure she had her stakes, which were all perfectly cut and perfectly sharp and perfect.
Mary Sue had a perfect figure, perfect blonde hair, perfect blue eyes, perfect feet, and a perfect face. In short, Mary Sue was perfect.
Mary Sue stopped at the cemetary, where she found Buffy and Spike walking together. She stopped the car and jumped out, stake ready.
"BUFFY! WATCH OUT! HE'S A VAMPIRE!" Mary Sue shouted, waving her arms perfectly and frantically.
"Bloody 'ell--?" Spike said, confused. Then he went all demonlike and attacked Mary Sue.
"Spike!" Buffy yelled. "You can't harm people, remember? They put that chip in your head!"
Spike stood up, his face going back to normal. "Wha? Oh yeah...right..."
"What's your problem?!" Buffy screamed at Mary Sue.
"Well, I'm a slayer, you're a slayer, and he's a vampire--"
"Woah, woah, woah, since when do Mary Sues become slayers?" Spike asked angrily.
"Since the beginning of fanfiction, erm, I didn't catch your name. I thought I should know it since I can't slay you," she said, perfectly regaining her perfect composure.
"It's Mr. William to you!" Spike snarled.
"Ok, Mr. William," she said perfectly, "Mary Sues are the perfect character. My brother, Gary Stu, is the perfectly reckless male counterpart. You can't have a good story without us, you know." She said all of this perfectly proudly.
Then Buffy got an idea. She took Spike by the arm and led him away. "Stay there," she said sweetly at Mary Sue, who stood perfectly still.
"Spike, I don't think this Mary Sue is a human. I'm sure Willow could tell you she's not, she knows all about that stuff I think...anyway, kill her, and then we can go." Buffy said this not perfectly, for she was perfectly NOT a Mary Sue, and was proud of it.
Spike walked back with Buffy, his face all demonic. Then he lunged at Mary Sue, who gave a perfect scream of perfect fright. Spike began to drink her blood, then spit it out.
"Bloody bleedin hell! It tastes too perfect!" He spat it on Mary Sue's face, and then he and Buffy, arm-in-arm, walked off into the night...Another Mary Sue dead!
==XxXxX==
*sniff* I wanna thank ALL you guys who have been reviewing my fics! =) You've made all my days! Nice to be back writing fics again!
Coming up next (perhaps one of the most common of all...) Mary Sue the Pokemon Master!
(BTW, I wanna thank Pokemon, because it got me into fanfiction a few years ago in the first place! Heehee!)
