NOTE: This chapter gets a little more violent than usual (my my standards anyways), nothing to graphic but I just thought I should warn you.

Episode 7

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Officer Malak or Police brutality at it's finest

Day One

7:12 PM

Officer Malak and Officer McGregor cruised down minor street in his police cruiser AKA the Mal Mobile.

"I can't WAIT for an excuse to shoot my gun." He said excitedly

"Ha ha ha!" Laughed McGregor "Be patient Malak, you'll have plenty of time to shoot people with your gun."

"But I need to know."

"Tell you what." McGregor offered. "If nothing happens within two hours of our shift I'll take you to Rotten Ave to shoot some ladies of the night."

"Hookers?"

"Vampires."

"DEAL!"

The night went one pretty much uneventful for the first hour and a half. That was when the darkness of night was broken by the light of the Cop Signal, a badge shaped light shining high in the sky.

"I'm needed!" McGregor said, getting out of the car. "Malak, you go on this beat yourself I'll find you as soon as possible when I'm done."

McGregor ripped off his cop uniform revealing a cop uniform underneath, he jumped into the air and flew away.

"Awesome." Malak said to himself. "Now to go beat up some minors in the name of Rafa."

***

"Damn boring night." Malak damned "I've driven in damn circles for damn hours and still no damn crimes, now I'm out of damn gas."

Malak pulled into a damn gas station to fill up with damn gas. He placed the pump into the pump hole on his car and sat down against the car to light up a smooth cigarette (he doesn't smoke, but cigarettes make you cool). He also ate a jelly donut. He took a bite, oozing jelly oozed oozingly from the rear (of the donut) and dripped onto his uniform.

"Dang ooze!" Malak danged. "Great now I'm going to need both hands to clean my uniform. I'm going to have to place my cigarette precariously on the gas tank of my cruiser.

He placed the smoke down and went to clean his uniform.

KRAAAAAAAAACKOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!

The car next to the police cruiser exploded. Sending shards of car into bystander, killing all two of them instantly. It turned out that the car had exploded due to an explosion in the engine. Malak's cigarette fell to the ground and was snuffed out. Malak arrested the dead car owner and drove off to the police station.

Day 2

11:11 AM

We join Malak, in the middle of a pull over...

"...okay, I'll watch my speed next time officer. Thanks."

"That's not what yo mama said last night."

"Please sir! Quit talking about my mother like that." The traffic violator said, as if HE was in any position to correct Officer Malak. Malak pulled out his .004 caliber pistol and pointed it at the ne'er do well's head. "Officer!" The pathetic parasite to society pleaded. "My wife is in labor, please let me take her to the hospital!"

Malak looked past the man to his wife who was obviously faking her pain because she clearly had cocaine under her shirt.

"I am ABOVE the law!" He screamed.

"What? I never-"

click

"Damn! Outof bullets!" Malak said. "I wish I never stop by that preschool on my way here and showed those kids how to fire a gun." He turned to run back to his car, but stopped and turned to the criminal. "Stay here while I get more ammo."

When Malak got back to his cruiser the evil doer sped off. Malak hopped into his car and began pursuit. He got on the police radio.

***

"This is 916 K.O.P.s. Cop Radio, all cops all the time. Next up we have a dedication to the entire Ivalice Precinct from Officer Malak. Malak says there is an officer down and is in a highspeed pursuit with a suspected narcotics dealer.  Suspect has already killed two nuns, eaten a baby and run over a pregnant lady.Officer is requesting backup. This next song is Cop Killer on 916 Cop Radio...

***

The fleeing scumbag slowed down and drove onto a back road, no doubt hiding his COCAINE STASH!

"I better stay down this road. I don't want to cause an accident." The lying scumbag told his pregnant wife, whom he was probably going to eat later. "The hospital is just over 15 minutes away down this road. I sure hope that psycho cop doesn't find us."

Suddenly ten feet in front of the bastard the road exploded. The man glanced into his side mirror. "Why is the American Air Force involved?" He asked himself.

***At that moment in the fighter jet***

"Cadet James!" The Radio cackled "We need you to return immediately from your test flight for debreifing and refueling. Let me know what you think of the new jet."

"Roger that." The Cadet replied. "I just want to try and hit this car first and I'll return."

"10-4"

***end of jet scenario***

Luckily for the scum of the earth the Air Jet left from his distraction and went back to the United States. He (the baby eater) avoided the hole where he and his wife deserved to have been and continued at a steady speed down the road. The Hospital was in sight.

***

Mustadio set up his sniper rifle in the window of floor 7 of the Dorter City Hospital. A single wheelchaired man lie lifelessly on the ground below, his wheelchair in pieces. A single bullet had destroyed the man's chair.

Algus stood behind Mustadio in the shadows. "10 points for the cripple. Now try a car crash victim."

"Gotcha." Mustadio loaded another shell into his rifle, and began his watch.

Suddenly, the door flew open Officer Malak stood in the doorway.

"New plan boys." He said with a straight face.

He told them of his idea, and the three began to plan their attack.

***

The lying son-of-a-witch sped into the hospital parking lot and sped to a stop. The two lyers sped out of the car speedily. A silent gunshot was heard and the criminal's car exploded. Cocaine fountains shot forth into the sky and covered the ground. The pregnant woman's dress ripped to shreds (she was wearing clothes underneath you perverts) and a bomb fell to the ground. Another gunshot hit the bomb sending the two drug dealers into the air.

The man landed in front of a moving steamroller, and was comically killed. The woman landed in a nearby farm, owned by a homicidal farmer. She was also comically killed. She is now in the burger that you are eating. Malak was awarded a Purple Heart and a Nobel Prize and discharged from the force. Mustadio was arrested for the attempted murder of three people who he had killed. And Algus started the entire seventh floor on fire.

Malak later sold his awards and is now living comfortably in his room at the Beoulve's Residence. The Man and Woman were never seen again.