If you Want to Destroy my Sweater....
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part nine

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FLASHBACK-

"And the ignition's gone, its a Lucas Magneto i think..." Sirius scratched his head. "And the front wheel's bent from the collision, its er.. i'll need it replaced.."

"Ay, its a one sixtyfive by twenty inch." A burly mechanic surveyed Sirius' motorbike with a fag hanging out of his mouth.

"yeah." Sirius looked at the slightly bent piece of metal that was his pride and joy.

"Yer front suspension's gone an' all."

"What?"

"The vincent Girdraulic..." the mechanic pointed at the suspension, "See."

"Oh, well.. basically it needs a re-haul..."

"Might take a while."

"Serves you right." A much younger, cheerier Remus Lupin poked his friend in the ribs.

"Its not his fault he got delusions of grandeur." Lily stated.

"well. The charm wasn't quite right.." Sirius agreed, whilst the muggle took his bike away to survey the rest of the damage. "But i'm sure if lily were to help..."

"No." James suddenly piped up, grinning at his friend. "Sirius plus magical flying motorbike equals big big BIG trouble."

"Its for his Stud image." Peter squinted in the dark of the mechanic's wrokrooms to get a glimpse of the other muggle varieties of transport.

"Hey." Sirius looked round. "Just cuz you dont have one..."

"A bike or the stud image?" Anna, a pretty girl wih longish blonde hair next to Remus raised an eyebrow at him.

"Both." Edea smiled at Anna. "Hes grumpy he doesnt have the car to go with it."

"What happened to your broomstick?" Remus asked.

"its in my room. pride of place of course."

"Just cuz he cant fit the bike under the bed." James laughed. "Admit it Sirius, you're a muggle contraption lover.."

"Okay okay, i am defeated." Sirius hung his head mockingly. "Loser!"
***END***

"And it has triplex chain transmission..." Sirius said excitedly to Harry, who looked slightly lost in the conversation.

"Am i the only one who's lost?" Ron asked feebly.

"Hermione and Harry both gave Ron sympathetic looks saying that whatever Sirius was garbling about went straight over their heads too.

"Hello, attention back to the Sirius-love-mobile please?" Sirius waved his arms at them.

"You NAMED it?" Hermione laughed.

"So? Its not as bad as what James called his Broom." Sirius sniggered.

"What did he call it?"

"Vesuvian soldier... Vessie for short." Sirius cackled. "We all called it Vest. He got annoyed, long story."

"Riiight." Ron dipped a piece of bread in his tomato soup.

"Ignore him." Remus advised, "He's lost in realms of idiocy... He'll be back on Earth some time this evening."
****



A few weeks later, well into the Spring term, and Edea was in the middle of a class of disreputable Slytherins when a very out of breath Remus Lupin crashed through the door...

"Need your help- Sirius in trouble..." He wheezed as he dragged Edea out of the room. "Portkey this way."

"What's the matter?" Edea asked, getting slightly worried.

"Notimetoexplain." Remus said in one quick breath.

"Yet you had time to establish a Porkey?" Edea asked skeptically. "Remus.. i..."

The portkey took them to a small graveyard, surrounding a quiet country church.

"Professor!" Hermione screeched, "You're here, oh thank god..."

Edea raised an eyebrow, "I'm. Going. To. Kill. Him." She growled as Remus changed his robes with a flick of his wand. Hermione did the same to herself, and pointing a wand at her Defence professor, changed her black and grey robes into a shimmering white dress.

"Nuh-uh." Edea shook her head. "Frills. Don't like them." She pointed her own wand at the dress and it changed into an elegant white silk slip dress with a corset styled top half.

"Well, i've got to er..." Remus was feeling round in his pockets, then apparated.

"Edea." Dumbledore came walking out of the church, "You're going to be late..."

"Are we allowed to just.. leave the school?" Edea asked suspiciously.

"You know... Hermione asked me the same question." Dumbledore stroked his beard, pensively, "And i must say, this is highly irregular... but then again.. why not?" He offered Edea his arm, "Come, or i'm worried Sirius may decide to start crying."

"He blubbers." Edea explained to Hermione, "Please feel free to laugh at him."

****

(a/n)- i cant write weddings therefore in order to keep this a good fic- we skip ahead. agreed? good.
if anybody CAN write them, then e-mail it to me as a text file- e.ducruet@professor.co.uk (yes that IS my e-mail) and i'll stick it up as an interlude, saying who its by. The again... i might not put it up, depends on whether it goes with what i think...

****



"Cake?" Sirius offered another slice to his new wife. The entire group, consisting of Them, Dumbledore, Remus, Harry Ron and Hermione were sitting out in the field behind the church having the 'reception'.

"If i eat more cake, i'll burst." Edea muttered, taking the slice anyway.

"Interesting visual." Sirius frowned. "Little Edea fragments."

"THANK you." Remus laughed. "Sirius, we are eating and that's just.... typical of you."

"Myself apologises for its behaviour." Sirius grinned

"Drunk." Hary smiled at his godfather, "Youre drunk."

"I'm not drunk- just slightly... merry."

"Drunk." Ron agreed.

"Wait 'til he starts telling you about the man with the..."

"Golden Eyeball!" Sirius finished for her, laughing into his champagne glass.

"Then you know hes gone."

"Do we call you Professor Black now?" Hermione asked

"I liked DuCruet actually. It was a nice name." Edea wondered aloud.

"Are you saying my name isn't nice?" Sirius asked incredulously.

"No i wasnt saying that... i was saying i liked my name as much as yours."

"You so were not."

"You must excuse me, i have an owl in my office that needs to be attended to..." Dumbledore stood up. "I wish you a very happy rest of the day, and you three, i dont expect you back in Hogwarts till dinner, as you're so "ill", even under Madam Pomfrey's excellent care."

"Thank you." Edea smiled, as he disapparated.

"How does he know about the owl?" Ron asked

"His mind is like a living marauder's map. he just KNOWS." Sirius used his glass for emphasis. "He knew all about our plans... he knew it was us, he knows all about the secret passages in and out of the school, the secret rooms, hidden treasures et ceterea."

"But how?"

"That, is something only Dumbledore knows." Edea shrugged, "Maybe even he doesn't know himself."

"I wonder what house he was in when he was at Hogwarts...."

"Not Slytherin." Sirius scowled. "My bet's on Gryffindor."

"I'm finding this incredibly difficult to imagine him as a child." Ron scratched his head.

"Without that beard... how weird would that be?" Harry agreed. "Not being all-knowing,"

"Omni.. om... omnisee... omniseesosent." Sirius slurred.

"Omniscient." Remus corrected.

"Whatever."

TBC