I woke up to the sound of the alarm ringing at eight thirty a.m. For someone who likes to sleep in late, this is not a good thing. Believe me. I grabbed my second pair of jeans and a new top with a few holes in it. Then I wandered down the stairs to see why we had to be up so early. The parents weren't getting ready for work, so I guessed they must have taken time off cause of me. Harm was standing at the stove making something that looked like pancakes but a different color, like wheat bread, while Mac stood at the toaster with waffles and loaded butter and syrup onto them. I laughed inwardly at the choices of this family.

Mac looked up after handing Austin his waffles and Sydney her healthy pancakes. "Which would you prefer? Health food like Harm," she said with a wrinkled nose, "Or waffles with syrup?" she asked as Harm threw a glance as if to tell me to take the pancakes.

"Uh, I don't know. I'll try the waffles I guess." She threw Harm a glance back, something that I could read as she chose my food.

"Mac…" he complained. "Trying to ruin Jessi's habits when she could be healthy."

"She could use it. Let her eat what she wants," she said as he came over and kissed her quickly on the lips.

I grimaced as did Sydney and Austin. "Get a room, please," he said aloud as a giggle escaped my lips. I immediately turned my lips back to a plain line. We all sat down and I stayed as silent as possible. I didn't really want to play tricks on these people. They seemed too nice.

"Jessi, today we're going school shopping, and I'd like to get you some new things."

"I don't have any money," I muttered.

"Well, you're not paying for it, so you don't need any."

"You're going to buy me clothes? I'm not even your kid," I said incredulously.

Both Sydney and Austin turned silent at this. "You are not our biological child, but you are in our house and while you are with us, you're our child," said Harm firmly.

I glared at him. Nobody tells me what to do. I ran up to my room and threw myself down on the bed. I grabbed my picture of my mother and father and hugged it tightly, but I wouldn't cry. I couldn't cry. It was a girly thing to do. So why was my cheek all wet? It wasn't like he was being like that on purpose. I suddenly felt a hand on my back. I whipped around to see Mac standing next to my bed. "What are you doing?" I yelled. "Get out, this is my room!"

She didn't move, just stood there looking at me. "Look, Jessi, you will always have your parents. But while you are here, you're our responsibility. We will never be your biological parents, but we will always be here for you," she said kindly.

"I don't need you or my parents! All I need is me!" I yelled at her, then finally I couldn't take it. I lay back down on my bed and sobbed. I just wanted to be left alone, and I just wanted somebody to love me, but not with pity. I didn't want to be their daughter; I wanted to be my parent's daughter.

For once, Mac looked unsure as I peeked out to see her reaction. Finally, she sat down next to me and placed a hand on my back again and rubbed comfortingly. And this time I didn't pull away.

We went to the store that afternoon. We had stopped for lunch and then at the mall. Mac took Sydney and I into a few stores to pick out a few skirts, shirts, jeans, and dresses while Harm took Austin to get his boy stuff. When we finished, I looked actually like a girl. I was wearing my new red shirt with little buttons and a pair of flare jeans that Mac had picked out for me. Sydney looked cute too. With that afternoon, we could have actually been sisters. But the minute we hit home, it hit me again and I became silent. I trudged up to my bedroom and put on the new pajamas Mac had bought, saying I needed new pajamas because my other ones were dirty and full of holes, plus about three sizes too small. I had more clothes that afternoon than in my entire life.

I lay down after putting things away and eating dinner with them. I opened the book I had picked off Miss Grant's shelf. It turned out to be a really good book, at least for the first five chapters. Before long, I heard them down the hall tucking in Syd and Austin, and I wondered if, after all that I had done to them today, they'd come tuck me in. And they did. They peeked through my door first, and then Mac came over to my bed and pulled my covers up. I could smell her perfume as she took my book and put it on my bed-stand. Then she smiled at me, like it seemed my mother would have done a long time ago, and the Harm smiled too. They left my room quietly, and even though I was already ten, it felt nice to be tucked in. And I decided I would let her do it if she wanted to.

In the middle of the night I woke up screaming. I must have been having the nightmare again because I was crying really hard when I woke up. My heart hurt really bad, which is kind of hard to explain, but I felt so alone and so scared. I never let myself be scared because it would mean I'm girly, and I could never be girlish. But I was terrified that I would be all alone…until Mac walked through the door in her robe. I glanced up at her and hiccuped.

She smiled at me and then found her way over to my bed. "You okay?" she asked.

"Y…yeah," I said as I hiccuped again.

"Water?" she asked as she handed me a small glass.

I found myself accepting the water from her. I smiled a small smile and then handed it back. She pulled my covers back up and then told me to sleep well before walking out of the room.

TBC…