Reflection

Chapter Five: Treason (Third Person POV)

"Botan, right?"

The mere wintry timbre of his voice caused her to stiffen, with only the movement of her hands tightening on the ones she held evident. She couldn't speak. A huge lump had formed in her throat through the mist of shock and bewilderment, their dueling gazes increasing her heartbeat at a maddening rate. With each defying step he took, she felt a tremor spread up her arms and body that made her want to get away. But she couldn't move, nor could she leave Shuuichi here. She was on her own, trapped under atrocious depths his golden gaze.

His eyes gave out a glint as he threaded closer, displaying a hint of malevolence with every move, contrasting Shuuichi's meek ones. He had stopped a feet away from her, staring into her eyes that tried to hide the fear behind her placid looks. He felt her hold her breath as he leaned closer, engulfing her lithe hands within his own. They felt ice cold as he eased them away from Shuuichi's, finding hers resisting his hold by the time she regained her thoughts. But his strength was unremarkably stronger, and had her pulled up to him the minute she let go.

She tried to get away but he held her to tightly that she could barely move. Through the haze of her struggle, he still found the strength to glide a hand around her waist, holding her deadly closer, a gasp emanating from her paling lips. Finally, she found her voice as she spoke, "Wh…What are you doing?"

A grin spread through his thin lips as he placed a kiss on her hand, caressing her fingers with his thumb. His eyes never left hers, leaning closer until their heads were side by side. He was much taller than she was, but still held a firm hold onto her, his hand resting hers on his chest to creep down her arms, joining his other one behind the small of her back.

She shut her eyes as he placed a kiss on her temples. She couldn't believe this. This was still Kurama, although it made her feel like it was someone else. By the time she saw the flicker of malice in his eyes, she knew this was not the youkai she had grown accustomed to. Never could she imagine for him to do what he was right at the moment. But she couldn't get away, who knows what he'll do to her if she even dared to try. She could only wish for a miracle to happen for her to get away.

"Have you ever felt his eyes on you before?" he asked, a whisper as it went out of his smirking lips. He pulled away enough to look into her eyes, magnetizing hers after all the uncertainty she concealed. She held an impassive expression as she stared back. As a reply, she shook her head uneasily, making him smirk more. "I have," he continued as his hand crept up to find hers again, twining their fingers in a firm hold. Her hands felt cold and damp, a slight tremor on her fingers as he grasped them in his own. "Several times. Much more than what you may consider normal," the whole time he had rested his cheek on her hair, his fingers driving her insane as they played with hers. He laughed. "Do you know what I'm getting at?"

She shook her head. Much as she did know where he wanted to go to, no, she didn't want to think about it. She declines the thought of Kurama actually seeing her as that. This was a play, a condition to change her mind off things to let her guard down. She refused to meet his eyes anymore, finding her whole body shaking whenever she tried. She turned her head on the side for her not see him smirk at her.

He laughed again, a mirth that rang though the whole room like a never-ending echo of a mantra. It was too silent for her sanity.

His hand let hers go once again as he moved it to her hair, sliding it down her cheeks and resting on the junction of her neck and shoulders. He kissed her closed eyes, tasting the single tear that found its way down her face. "I've decided that I want to make his life miserable," he said as he cupped her chin in his fingers, turning her head to look at him. "Now, the part that includes you doesn't seem so hard as I thought," one side of his lips moved up in a grin that made her want to get away. He leaned closer, placing a kiss on her forehead, moving down on her nose, then sliding down again to place a final kiss on where he had always intended to be.

Through all the loathing of the feel of his seeking lips, the kiss ended, but she still felt the torment of disgust and frustration grating her every nerve. "If you don't believe me, fine. But then that would make the reason why I'm doing this is because I really do want you," a hoarse laugh emitted from him, the chill in his laughter making her feel more vulnerable and weak. This can never be Kurama.

She shut her eyes. She couldn't take it anymore.

She found the strength to push him. She meant to turn away from him but he had her wrist in a tight grasp before she could. He pulled her to face him, clutching her chin closer, forcing her to lock her lips with his again. But she tried to get away this time, but then he did all the right defenses to her hits, trapping her in his hold as he pushed her on a nearby wall.

She winced, holding her shoulders as the pain surged through her whole body. She trembled in her place, sweat covering her face as he sat down the floor, her eyes in pain. She couldn't feel her body, and she felt exhausted and drained. Just as she thought she could take no more, a spasm of pain had set into her stomach, a sudden blow. She coughed out blood, wincing through the remaining mist of consciousness as she tried to stay awake. She only remembered tasting the saltiness of her internal wound, and his lips against hers again before she fell.

He had won. She was weak and unguarded then, giving him all the access he could. But before he could even take another step, his head suddenly felt like it was hit. His world started to spin, making him grasp the bed beside him as he fell on his knees. He gritted his teeth as the pain increased, making him let out a muffled scream.

Amidst all the weight that seems to sip through his head, he heard a moan. A -very- familiar moan. Different from all the screams he heard in his mind, a moan so loud it had to be real. In pain, but nonetheless, real.

His eyes snapped open as another low moan emitted from the bed. He's waking up, he thought as he tried to stand up, stumbling before he could actually stand straight. His veins felt like they had burst as he tried to stand up, feeling his muscles stretched to their final limit. He found it difficult to even walk. By that time, Shuuichi was panting, slight chokes coming from his throat as he tried to catch his breath. "No!" he cried out as his hand flew to Shuuichi's mouth to cover it, his other one in his neck, holding it in a tight coil. "Never," he said, whimpering through the struggle through consciousness and numbness. "Not anymore, Shuuichi, no more…" with that said, he held Shuuichi's struggles down and claimed his lips in his own once again.

It was not the kiss similar to what he had given the girl. This time, the kiss was filled with despair and anger that even he himself was getting hurt. All the hatred, all the anger, dueled in a kiss.

"Get…Get away from me," Shuuichi's cries were low and almost inaudible as he tried to struggle away, finding a few chances to get away from the youkai's kisses. His face was covered in anxiety as he tried to shift from on side to the other, finding some sort of leverage from the youkai in an attempt to escape.

"No, never. Never again will I allow you to own me," Youko Kurama said just as weakly, as if trying to fight sleep, fight Shuuichi, looking like he would fall down just seconds from then. He tried to cease his adversary's actions as he held his hands down, forcing another kiss into him from the one he had struggled away from a moment before.

She felt weak as reality seemed to flood through her again. She slowly opened her eyes, only to see Youko Kurama holding a struggling Shuuichi down. She felt her heart skip a beat as she tried to take everything in. What was happening?

He couldn't do this forever. He can't let him do this to him. He didn't want to be in the submissive, to be taken just as quickly as one could whenever he wakes up. He didn't feel right, and it was driving him insane. He felt weak. Numb. All the remaining energy he had with him slept away, leaving him weak and unmoving. His mind felt like it was getting electrocuted as the youkai tilted his head to deepen the kiss. Much as he felt it was just as difficult to him to tolerate kissing, he knew there was something into the kiss. Something that they have been playing tug-of-war from after all this time.

But how could he win?

Amidst the daze of weakness, Botan was able to stand up to run to them, trying to push the youkai away from Shuuichi as quickly as she could. She knew he had to be sent away.

The kiss broke as Youko Kurama jumped off, forced by Botan's dominating strength due to his decreasing one, his breath caught in shallow gasps as he tried to fight off the faintness of his body. His eyes locked with Shuuichi's, each emitting a glare before he leapt through the window to escape.

He watched him leave, his eyes drifting closer and closer to sleep as much as he tried opening them. He felt himself fall into yet another oblivion, with only the comfort of Botan's voice calling him left to hold him into the dark abyss.

==

"Almost got me, didn't you?" his voice was mocking. With each and every word he speaks, it always caused a hole in his heart, burning the sides with a hatred he never thought he could posses. Amidst the kindness and meekness of his eyes, the silence of his voice, he could never tolerate such indecency against him much less than he could resist the urge to kill his own body then and there.

"Go away" through the blindness of darkness, he knew he was glaring. If only looks could kill, he knew both of them would be bleeding into fatality by then. Much as he still couldn't comprehend the situation, he knew he had reached the limit of his fury. He just couldn't think of anything worse than what he had to face.

The youkai smirked. "I got the girl."

His brows tightened, his jaws firming as he gritted his teeth. Surely, nothing else can worsen things more. "Shut up and leave her alone."

"I know you saw what happened," he said, his voice full of spite and ridicule, much more than he could even take. "Don't fool me, little boy, you had my eyes. I could hear you screaming. I can hear your curses amidst everything that I have done. Whenever I touch her, whenever I kiss her, you're hating every ticking second of it while I enjoyed it."

He was silent, but his fist coiled up into a tight ball, trembling through the rage of flames surging through his veins.

"You couldn't take it."

He wanted to get away. From all the things, not her. Not those he had grown close to. He could accept anything, all the torment his body could take, even those that are fatal. But not them. Of all things, not them.

"You're too soft, Shuuichi. You are weak."

"Go away."

"I find that hard to do now that I'm about to be free from you," laughter rang through the whole surrounding. "Goodbye, Shuuichi."

Freedom? Freedom from what? What did he mean?

As he felt the presence depart from his thoughts, he felt the twinge of pain as he sensed blood pouring out of his skin again. Must've been the force he had exerted within him the whole while they had talked. He shut his eyes, leaving his mind to rest and sleep, with only the thought of having -her- hold his real body in her arms comforting him through all his delinquent burdens.

End of chapter 5