Fate copyright 1998 to L'Arc~en~Ciel.
Fushigi Yuugi and all characters are property of Watase Yuu.
SORA: SKY
Energy may be likened to the bending of a crossbow; decision, to the releasing of the trigger...The clever combatant looks to the effect of combined energy...He takes individual talent into account, and uses each man according to his capabilities.
Sun Tzu, The Art of War
The phone rang only twice before I picked it up. I usually hated answering the phone, would let it ring until the answering machine picked up, but it might be the hospital. I grabbed it, shoved it to my ear, hoping to hear the voice of the intensive care unit nurse.
"Ola?"
"Pedro?" The voice spoke in English. "This is Andy Wong."
Not the nurse. My heartbeat slowed and the tension left my chest. I felt drained.
"Hello, Andy."
I shifted the phone to my left ear and closed the curtains partly on the gray and rainy afternoon. The sky probably wasn't going to get any lighter today. The weather channel reported 70 percent chance of rain starting late afternoon, and there would almost certainly be flooding.. I would have to run my errands as soon as I got off the phone…and make a visit to the hospital.
"Listen, Pedro-"
A pause and a scuffle of the phone changing hands. "Pedro? Denis."
I could hear the tension over the line. "Denis? What's going on?"
"Pedro…agh." A sound of frustration. "I dunno how to say this…look, Miaka needs your help. And Seiryuu seishi."
"WHAT?"
"Hey, hey, calm down. I know it's a shock. Yeah, they're alive and in Tokyo…Nakago got hit by a car…Hong and Duke are-"
"Denis!"
A pause. "Yeah?"
"I'm not understanding a word you are saying." I held the phone in one hand, groping with the other for the arm of the couch that I knew was somewhere to my right. "The Seiryuu seishi…are alive?"
"They're here….with us in Tokyo. Hong and I met Nakago and Amiboshi…on the street…there was a car accident. Nakago…Stephan…His neck is broken…And Miaka…she won't wake up…Look, I know this isn't making sense to you and there's no time to explain…I know you're not a doctor anymore, but do you remember? How to heal, I mean?"
His neck is broken…
I found the sofa and sank into the soft cushions, staring up at the ceiling and hearing Denis' jabbering voice in my ear. "Heal?"
"I don't know what's going on. There's a huge typhoon coming through here, and the water is just rising and rising…Hong and Duke are missing…Miaka's in some type of coma or something. I think it has to do with us…if you could somehow help us…please…"
My hands were shaking and I could hardly keep the phone in his grasp.
"Look, Denis-"
"I know it's a bad time-"
I closed my eyes, leaning against the back of the couch. "Denis, my sister was just killed in a car accident and my wife is in the hospital with a broken neck. Yes, it's a bad time."
"Oh." The former bandit sounded taken aback. I waited.
"Damn, Pedro, I-I'm sorry. I won't bother you."
"I can't think about this right now, Denis."
"S-Sorry," the voice mumbled over the phone. "I'll let you go, then."
"I can't even heal my own family," I said softly. "How can I help Miaka? The Seiryuu seishi, who were enemies? I'm sorry, Denis, but I can't."
I didn't wait for the answering apology but simply took the phone from my ear and set it softly back down in the cradle.
Do you remember? How to heal?
So it was the same as it had always been. I'd been the healer, the last resort, the one who was either passed over or couldn't make it in time. From what I could remember…of the past. Mitsukake, the healer. Mitsukake, who would make everything all right by healing whatever wound whatever seishi was suffering from and then who would stand quietly in the shadows while the others risked fool life and limb so they could come back and be healed again.
And always, when it had really mattered, I couldn't heal.
Always.
Thunder rumbled outside. A typhoon, Denis had said. I remembered seeing that on the television this morning when I was sitting in the waiting room. I hated hospitals. They were too white and sterile and clean and, for some reason, smelled of death.
I had thought it was all over. That I could live a normal life now, as a normal man and be rid of the ghosts that had plagued me for so long in the past. But apparently my god would not let me go.
"Damn you, Suzaku," I whispered. "Damn you."
What more do you want from me? I gave you my love, my life, and now you take it away from me again?
I brought my fist crashing down on the coffee table in a sudden fit of despair.
"WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT?"
The shout reverberated through the house, but otherwise all was quiet. I slumped back on the couch, drained. I needed to go to the hospital. It was almost like death to me every time I had walked in through those doors and heard the beeping of the heart monitor that sustained my wife's fragile life. Why did it have to be her? Why not…someone else?
Nakago…Stephan…His neck is broken.
I drew a deep shuddering breath. Storms…here and in Tokyo. Car accidents here and in Tokyo. Two people injured….one here and one in Tokyo.
It has to do with us.
If I had gone to Tokyo instead of coming back here to clear the mortgage on the house, would my family still be alive and well?
"Suzaku," I breathed into the still air. "What the hell do you want from me?
Through the half-closed curtains, the rain began falling from the gray sky.
Why won't you let me go?
"Pedro can't do anything," Denis said in a wooden voice as he slammed the phone back into the cradle. "His family was in a car accident…His sister didn't make it. His wife broke her neck."
I looked at Andy. He had the same stricken look on his face.
"Nakago," I said. "Just like Nakago."
He nodded.
"Hey…Tamah-Taka?"
I turned to find Steven Grant staring at me with wide blue eyes. His hair was still wet, but he was dressed in dry, clean clothes. "What's going on? Where is Yui?"
I swallowed.
"Steven…I think we need to talk."
"Amiboshi."
My fingers paused on the keys, but his eyes were still closed and he looked like he was asleep. Had he spoken? A muscle in his cheek twitched slightly.
"Amiboshi…you will go to Konan-koku."
I froze.
"S-Stephan?"
He sighed through parted lips and then relaxed back into slumber. My heart was racing, and I couldn't seem to breathe. I struggled not to drop my flute as I stared at his sleeping face, hearing that deep voice in my head once more.
Amiboshi, you will go to Konan-koku.
No! Aniki! Why? Why do you have to go? Why can't I go with you?
The man who had spoken just then was not Stephan Beau-Signeur but Nakago. Had he forgotten? There were two sets of memories residing in that body, as in all our bodies, and ultimately one would have to triumph…right?
Was that how it worked? Would I start to forget Jeff Cotorro and slide back into half-forgotten memories of Seiryuu shichi seishi Amiboshi?
"Stephan?" I whispered, almost afraid to make a sound. "Wake up...? Please?"
There was no answer.
"I'm going to go."
"NO!"
I gave him a mocking smile, empty and bitter. "Why so vehement, Tamahome? Didn't you want me dead before?"
"Look, Steven, the streets are flooding. There's going to be an earthquake any minute now…we might not even be safe in the house! You'll be killed if you go outside! Be reasonable!"
"My brother is over there, Tamahome. The girl I love, who I have gone through two lifetimes to be with, is there."
"They're not in any danger! Steven, you're insane. How are you going to get there? Nothing is running. Half the power lines in the city are down!"
"Same as I got here," I replied, shrugging into my still-wet coat. "Walk."
"Steven-"
"I came to be with her," I said. "She needs me. Seiryuu will protect me."
"You-"
I opened the door to the pouring rain. Thunder rumbled and the wind was violent against my clothing and my hair. I heard Taka come up beside me. "No more arguments, Tamahome."
"I'm not arguing," he said, and I turned to see him wearing a raincoat and rainboots. He handed me a pair with a fierce look.
"I'm coming with you."
I woke to the dim light of a cigarette lighter.
"I think he's coming around," a voice said in English, and I coughed, feeling something wet trickle down my cheek. My stomach felt raw and my eyes were gritty.
"Duke? Can you hear me?"
I opened my eyes fully and saw a face leaning down at me, eyes worried. It was blurry. I blinked and tried to refocus, and Hong's face swam into view.
"Ho-Hong?"
"Don't talk," he said. Before he could say anything else the peculiar feeling in my stomach manifested itself into the form of me vomiting up the dinner I had eaten tonight all over his lap.
I saw him back away quickly as the half-digested food came spilling out of my mouth and as I sank exhausted back onto whatever ground I was currently sprawled out on, I felt arms catch my head in a gentle grasp, a cloth wiping my mouth.
"Where am I?" I rasped. The sour tinge of stomach acid and bile rankled my throat. I felt sick. "Why are you here?"
"There was an accident…" Hong trailed off. Strands of short dark hair hung around his face and he had a bruise over one eye and cuts on his forehead. "You were in the other car that hit mine."
"Damn. Talk about fate."
He shrugged, then winced. "I wouldn't be surprised if we were the only cars out on the streets…the water is rising too fast and there's no way we would have made it anywhere."
"Where am I?" I said again, feeling a little better as my stomach settled.
"The second floor of a subway station waiting area. All lower areas are already flooded out."
Looking around in the light of the lightning flashes outside, I could see concrete pillars and benches.
"We must be crazy," I said, struggling to sit up. Hong's arm slid down to my shoulders and he helped me up, leaning me against one of the pillars that dotted the station.
"It gets worse." I caught the grim note in his voice and the eyes that looked into mine were deadly serious.
"Hong?" I had never seen him look this way. "What's wrong?"
"He means me," said a new voice, approaching through the dark. A light flared and the voice became a stocky man carrying a flashlight and wearing a long raincoat. He was American too, it looked like, and he had a friendly face that I guessed was usually smiling. At the moment he looked just as serious as Hong did.
"You all right, kid?"
"I'm fine," I mumbled. I hated it when people called me "kid." I suppose he caught my look, because he stuck his hand out in apology.
"Sorry. Slip of the tongue. I would have guessed you wouldn't want a reminder of your age…anyway, my name is Phillip Cartwright. Nice to meet you."
"Duke Prio," I said, returning the handshake. I couldn't see what was so threatening about this man, if indeed that was what they were worried about. "You're American?"
He nodded and one corner of his mouth lifted in a smile. Yes, his face was definitely built for smiling. "From Kansas, born and bred. You?"
"Texas."
The corner of his mouth lifted further. "You don't have a Texas accent. Or look like a cowboy."
"Well, you don't look like a wheat farmer," I returned, already feeling at ease with this man. He grinned, finally.
"Touché."
"Duke."
Hong's serious voice cut into my thoughts, and I turned slightly, frowning.
"Do you know who this man is?"
"Look…Hong…don't give him more to be frightened about than he already is," Phillip cut in, setting the lantern on the ground and squatting next to me. "Duke…what Hong is trying to say is…" He broke off, looking at the ground. "Man, this is tough. Do you remember…anything? Of…a past life?"
I went very still. "How did you know?"
Phillip and Hong exchanged unreadable glances. Phillip looked back at me, sighing deeply. "Do you remember the one who killed you?"
I looked into his eyes, so honest and worried, and suddenly I suspected exactly what he was trying to say. One glance at Hong confirmed my suspicions.
Seiryuu?
They were both watching me intently, the one who had been known as Chichiri and the one who had been…Miboshi? It couldn't be. Phillip was friendly and helpful and honest, and obviously Hong trusted him more than a little, or else none of us would be here sitting in this abandoned subway station in the middle of a typhoon.
But apparently it was. Did Hong hate him for what he had done to me in the past? I glanced at Hong again, but he was watching Phillip instead.
"I'm sorry," Phillip murmured at last when I didn't respond. "I don't know what to say…I just thought you should know…in case you, you know." He shrugged helplessly. "I'm sorry."
The man who knelt before me with head bent was not a Seiryuu seishi. At least not one of the Seiryuu seishi that I had known. His sorrow was too genuine, his apology too real. Or perhaps I was too innocent…
I would not hold a grudge against a man, who, no matter what he had been in the past, was now simply a stranger first met.
No matter what, I wanted to make things right.
My hand caught at Phillip's wrist as he started to stand, and he stopped in mid-movement, the flashlight dangling from his hand.
"My name was Chiriko," I said quietly. "And I was the orchestrater of my own death."
"Duke-!"
I ignored the exclamation from Hong, keeping my eyes fixed on Phillip's, hoping he would understand. And suddenly, he smiled.
"You're a noble one," he said. "Thank you."
We stayed huddled around the flashlight as if the puny light would give us warmth. Three Seiryuu and two Suzaku, glancing at each other over the light, not wary glances but simply tired ones.
I had introduced myself as Nikolas, but Phillip had been quick to make it clear that Marco and I were not mere mortals either. The two Suzaku seemed to accept that as simple fact, which surprised me greatly.
Pleased to meet you, the one named Hong had said, who had then introduced himself as Suzaku shichi seishi Chichiri. Marco and I had looked at one another. We had expected hostility, perhaps denail, but never acceptance. I frowned at Phillip, who shrugged and smiled.
Second chances, remember?
Change.
They'd changed too. The Suzaku. I couldn't pinpoint exactly what, but they had definitely changed. They seemed…older, maybe. Wiser, and sadder.
I could understand that.
"So are we just going to sit here until we rot away and die?"
Duke Prio's voice broke into my thoughts. I had not been too surprised when he had introduced himself as Chiriko. Ever since that day on the train I had known he was not what he seemed…and so had he, apparently, with simply a nod of his head when I had revealed myself as Tomo.
"There's nowhere we can go," Hong said wearily. He leaned his head against the pillar. His eye was swelling quickly, but we had nothing to put on it at the moment. "We're stuck."
He had told us in brief and sketchy detail what had happened earlier this evening at the crossroads, and I simply felt a great sorrow slide over me as he told us of Stephan's fate. I did not know if I still loved Nakago, but it was a waste of a man who had done so much to turn his life around. That was probably why Yui had wanted us at the hospital, and we had no way of reaching her now.
"Cell phone services are down," I said, "so I can't call anyone. Yui-sama is still waiting at the hospital…"
"Did she call all of us?" Phillip wondered.
"I think so."
"Suboshi - Steven Grant - was at Taka and Miaka's house when I last left," Hong cut in. "He said she had called him a few days ago. He just arrived in Japan tonight..."
"What a day to arrive," Phillip said, blowing out a breath. The air was sticky with humidity and a little cold. The station itself was damp.
"You guys!"
Duke had pushed himself up from the ground and was standing, albeit a little unsteadily. "I'm not going to sit here and wait around for something to happen! Don't you see what's going on?"
"What?" Hong looked baffled, starting to stand to grip the boy's arm. "Duke, sit down!"
Duke shoved his arm away with surprising strength. "Your miko is calling you, and so is ours!" His voice was desperate. The stations was lit with the brilliance of lightning, and thunder crashed. "We can't afford to wait! This isn't about a typhoon and rain and a storm and a car accident! It's about our gods and us! Can't you see that? If we don't do something…we'll die."
He was swaying on his feet now, and when Hong put an arm around him to steady him, he didn't push it away. Marco and Phillip and I looked at each other.
"He's right," I said quietly, feeling an sudden respect for the boy. "You know, he's right."
Marco nodded. "I told you before, Nikolas. Fate."
Phillip jumped to his feet, picking up the flashlight.
"Well, shit, then! Yui-sama needs us, and we're just sitting here?"
"Hong, are the floors below all flooded?"
The Suzaku seishi nodded. "The water was up to waist level when we carried you up here, and I'd be willing to bet anything that it's creeping up the stairs as we speak."
We were silent for a minute, and I could hear the thoughts whirring in the others' heads. The question was not if now, but how. How we could get out of this building and reach the gods who were calling us to them. How we could get out in time. The wind and rain and storm was no barrier now, because we were the chosen ones, and nature could not hurt us, we whose gods were more powerful than death.
A thunder crash made us all jump, and my eyes went to the window through which moments before a lightning flash had lit up the room and the sky beyond.
The sky…
Water met sky a few meters down below the edge of the windowsill.
"Hey," I said. "What if we go through the window?"
The pouring rain and wind battered at us as we made our way down the deserted streets. The water was almost to mid-thigh now, and the city of Tokyo looked dead, drowned by water.
"Steven, slow down! You're going to get yourself killed!"
I didn't even bother to look back at Taka, who was struggling along behind me. I needed to get to Yui. My heart was burning in my chest, knowing that somehow, some way, this was the only thing I had to do and then I could let go, I could let everything else go and drift away in peace. If I could be with her.
I had neglected her. I hadn't seen that, but it was painfully obvious now. Our awkward phone calls, our waning communication. It wasn't supposed to be like this. I had fought two lifetimes for her, and I had been the one to let it all go, because I hadn't cared enough.
When I hadn't been able to find my brother I'd completely dropped communication with her, believing that if I couldn't have my aniki I would die. Just as I had believed before, in another lifetime. One would think I would have learned from past mistakes.
Standing in Taka's house and listening to Denis' impassioned conversation on the phone, I had realized two things.
One, that the man who was my brother now was a complete stranger to me. He had the memories of Amiboshi the Seiryuu seishi, but I had never met him. I loved Amiboshi, not Jeff Cotorro. I had been chasing after a dream. I could never have my brother truly back, no matter how much I wanted and yearned for it to be so, and moping about wasn't going to solve anything.
And two, that Yui really did love me.
The second truth was the most important of all.
"Steven! Slow down!"
"We're running out of time, Tamahome!" I shouted back. Lightning streaked down from the sky and the hairs on the back of my neck prickled from the electricity, but I kept on. The water was cold. I could no longer feel my legs.
"Out of time for what?"
"Everything!"
"Steven-"
Another flash of lightning, but somehow this one was too close and I felt a red flash of pain and the world shrank to a pinpoint of light before my eyes.
"STEVEN!"
I screamed.
I could no longer stand, and I felt only the cold shock of the water hitting my face. The current was too strong and I couldn't move my fingers to grasp onto anything. I was drifting away.
It was too soon. I couldn't go yet. I hadn't finished!
Yui…!
Something strong clamped onto me and hauled me partially out of the water, dragging me to one side, out of the current. I drew a deep, shuddering breath. Hands massaged my arms.
"You ok?"
My limbs did work after all. I nodded, somewhat shakily.
"Stupid…Soi…trying to play a trick…on me."
He laughed weakly, and before I could react pulled me close in a fierce embrace.
"You idiot," Taka said. "You fucking brave, insane idiot." He was crying.
"Tamahome-"
"I'm sorry," he said. "I'm sorry. I forgive you. I'm sorry."
I closed my eyes. I heard the roar of thunder in my ears, but I could no longer feel the electricity of the lightning as I pulled him close in return, as I would any close friend. As I would my own brother.
The rain mixed with my tears until I could no longer tell which was which, but it didn't matter, because I could finally cast aside the burden of the dead innocent ghosts which had been weighing on my memories for so long.
Chuei.
Gkyokuran.
Shunkei.
Yuiren.
He released me just as suddenly and unexpectedly, and we stood for a moment staring at each other in the rain, smiling through the storm.
"Come on, Suboshi," he said, grabbing me by the arm. "The ones you love…they're waiting for you."
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