Running Smooth
by Juu-chan and Abandonment
Note: For all warnings, disclaimers, and notes, see Part One.
- - -
Part Six: The Confrontation
- - -
The taxi was silent for the entirety of the ride back to Duo's apartment. Duo didn't even dare speak as he paid the driver; he handed over his money without a word and nodded his thank you and goodbye.
The walk up the stairs was silent. No one spoke as Duo unlocked the door. They entered the apartment but still nothing was said. Duo showered, then Heero, and still silence. Just before dinner the first words were spoken:
"The eggs are burning."
"Shit!"
And when the heat had been turned down:
"Thanks, Heero."
"Hn."
Nothing over dinner - silence continued until just before they retired for the night. Again, it was Heero who spoke first.
"I'll sleep on the couch tonight," he said.
Duo swallowed, reluctant to speak. Heero watched him, waiting, the look in his eyes ordering Duo to respond. Eventually, he was forced to as the silence threatened to become overwhelming again.
"But Heero, I thought we decided to sleep in my bed while you're here."
Heero's eyes narrowed and Duo felt himself shrink under the gaze.
"You asked me how long I would be here and how serious I was, correct, Duo? You expected me to promise you forever, didn't you, everything I have for the rest of my life? That's a lot to ask, especially when you refuse to give me even half as much. You're sleeping with someone else, and now you expect me to share a bed with you. No."
"Look, I didn't mean to hide anything from you, I just wanted to be sure you were serious beforeā¦"
"Before what, Duo? Before you broke up with your boyfriend?"
Duo bit him lip, worrying it, and eventually nodded. "Yeah."
"I'm sleeping on the couch tonight," Heero said after a long heavy pause. "Spend tonight thinking. We'll talk tomorrow."
Duo spoke very quickly: "Look, Heero, I'm sorry. I didn't know what to do, but I really didn't mean to hurt -"
"Shut up, Duo," Heero interrupted, turning away so that Duo could not see his face. "I said we would talk in the morning."
Duo had an urge to correct Heero - it would be afternoon by the time they woke up - but he kept his mouth shut. Heero's emotional moments were rare, few and far between, but when they came they were a hellstorm. He knew not to push it. When he was angry, Heero could get violent.
Duo turned away. "I'll get your sheets," he said, and walked to his room.
- - -
Damn it! thought Duo. He had work the next day and if he didn't get to sleep soon, he would be too tired to function. As much as he knew he needed to, he could not sleep; he had too much on his mind. He felt a need, so powerful it made his skin ache as if bruised, to be held, to pour out his thought to the person who shared his bed, to be cosseted and comforted. He could not - he was in bed alone.
What did he want me to think about anyway? Duo thought. About my stupidity? dishonesty? hypocrisy? About the fact that I'm too much of a coward to tell Heero about Ethan or to break up with Ethan?
Duo sat up in bed, grabbed his braid, and began to chew on the end, the hairs tickling his mouth. Tossing and turning had made strands escape their rope, but he made no move to rebraid his hair.
At the time, it had all made sense. Duo had thought about it, planned it out - in his mind it had seemed right and when doing it it had seemed right. Don't change anything just yet, he had planned, give the situation a few days and time will tell the truth: if it was Ethan, or Heero, who was more promising. He would then talk to Heero again or break up with Ethan. It would be easier - was his reasoning - to confront either one of them when his mind had been made up.
The "few days" he had planned became many, and then a week, and still he had not made up his mind. Then Heero began to work at the club, before Duo had even mentioned Ethan in conversation. Of course he had to keep the two from each other, to not do so would be clearly idiotic. He had looked around for Heero, had not seen him, and had dragged Ethan into a back room, saying he wanted it too badly to wait, hoping to hide Ethan from view. That had not worked; Heero had seen him with Ethan. Predicable.
They would talk in the morning, Heero had said. He had very little time to come up with an excuse and decide who he would choose - Ethan or Heero.
Duo did not sleep well.
- - -
'Morning' - although it was actually early afternoon - crept forward. It came slowly and was inevitable, Duo could feel it approaching and knew he could not escape. When it came he was forced out of his room.
Again, they ate in silence.
After the meal they sat at the table, empty plates pushed to the side and lukewarm, half-empty coffee cups before them.
"Well?" Heero said.
Duo spoke. "I thought just like you told me to," he began. "I couldn't come up with anything to do except tell you the whole story. So I will.
"Ethan and I are not dating. We only see each other at the club, and only about four times a week. It started around three months ago, and there hasn't been any off time.
"His name is Ethan Hart. I don't know how old he is or where he lives, his history, anything. That's just not the kind of relationship we have. We fuck every time we see each other, and he watches me, dances with me, buys me drinks, that type of thing. But there's little emotion involved and I'm pretty sure he's seeing other people. He doesn't love me.
"That, I guess, is all."
Heero asked, "What color are his eyes?"
Duo looked confused. "Hazel," he said, "you know, that green brown color."
And then Heero sat, watching Duo's face, his hands folded on the table, saying nothing. A fine mist of perspiration broke out along Duo's spine.
"Heero?" Duo said eventually.
"What now?" Heero asked. "Should I stay?"
"How would I know!" Duo jumped up from the table, outspoken, enraged, and not sure why. "You don't even know how serious you are about us, and you want me to make a decision like this? You want me to end the only relationship I've had since we split up, to end the only secure, comforting thing I have in my life?
"You know what I'm thinking? You know what option is looking good to me right now, Heero? I'll give you a hint: the answer's not you.
"Ethan takes care of me. You saw how he treated you - he's like that to anyone that threatens me or us. It's not love but it's better than anything else I got. It's all I can rely on nowadays, it's the only thing I understand!
"Not a chance I'll choose you over him, Heero. Not until I know that I won't be screwing myself by ending with Ethan and starting with you. Give me some assurance, some proof, and for now get the hell out of my business!"
Duo stormed out of the room, leaving Heero sitting at the table with his hands clasped and his coffee cooling. He still did not understand his anger.
by Juu-chan and Abandonment
Note: For all warnings, disclaimers, and notes, see Part One.
- - -
Part Six: The Confrontation
- - -
The taxi was silent for the entirety of the ride back to Duo's apartment. Duo didn't even dare speak as he paid the driver; he handed over his money without a word and nodded his thank you and goodbye.
The walk up the stairs was silent. No one spoke as Duo unlocked the door. They entered the apartment but still nothing was said. Duo showered, then Heero, and still silence. Just before dinner the first words were spoken:
"The eggs are burning."
"Shit!"
And when the heat had been turned down:
"Thanks, Heero."
"Hn."
Nothing over dinner - silence continued until just before they retired for the night. Again, it was Heero who spoke first.
"I'll sleep on the couch tonight," he said.
Duo swallowed, reluctant to speak. Heero watched him, waiting, the look in his eyes ordering Duo to respond. Eventually, he was forced to as the silence threatened to become overwhelming again.
"But Heero, I thought we decided to sleep in my bed while you're here."
Heero's eyes narrowed and Duo felt himself shrink under the gaze.
"You asked me how long I would be here and how serious I was, correct, Duo? You expected me to promise you forever, didn't you, everything I have for the rest of my life? That's a lot to ask, especially when you refuse to give me even half as much. You're sleeping with someone else, and now you expect me to share a bed with you. No."
"Look, I didn't mean to hide anything from you, I just wanted to be sure you were serious beforeā¦"
"Before what, Duo? Before you broke up with your boyfriend?"
Duo bit him lip, worrying it, and eventually nodded. "Yeah."
"I'm sleeping on the couch tonight," Heero said after a long heavy pause. "Spend tonight thinking. We'll talk tomorrow."
Duo spoke very quickly: "Look, Heero, I'm sorry. I didn't know what to do, but I really didn't mean to hurt -"
"Shut up, Duo," Heero interrupted, turning away so that Duo could not see his face. "I said we would talk in the morning."
Duo had an urge to correct Heero - it would be afternoon by the time they woke up - but he kept his mouth shut. Heero's emotional moments were rare, few and far between, but when they came they were a hellstorm. He knew not to push it. When he was angry, Heero could get violent.
Duo turned away. "I'll get your sheets," he said, and walked to his room.
- - -
Damn it! thought Duo. He had work the next day and if he didn't get to sleep soon, he would be too tired to function. As much as he knew he needed to, he could not sleep; he had too much on his mind. He felt a need, so powerful it made his skin ache as if bruised, to be held, to pour out his thought to the person who shared his bed, to be cosseted and comforted. He could not - he was in bed alone.
What did he want me to think about anyway? Duo thought. About my stupidity? dishonesty? hypocrisy? About the fact that I'm too much of a coward to tell Heero about Ethan or to break up with Ethan?
Duo sat up in bed, grabbed his braid, and began to chew on the end, the hairs tickling his mouth. Tossing and turning had made strands escape their rope, but he made no move to rebraid his hair.
At the time, it had all made sense. Duo had thought about it, planned it out - in his mind it had seemed right and when doing it it had seemed right. Don't change anything just yet, he had planned, give the situation a few days and time will tell the truth: if it was Ethan, or Heero, who was more promising. He would then talk to Heero again or break up with Ethan. It would be easier - was his reasoning - to confront either one of them when his mind had been made up.
The "few days" he had planned became many, and then a week, and still he had not made up his mind. Then Heero began to work at the club, before Duo had even mentioned Ethan in conversation. Of course he had to keep the two from each other, to not do so would be clearly idiotic. He had looked around for Heero, had not seen him, and had dragged Ethan into a back room, saying he wanted it too badly to wait, hoping to hide Ethan from view. That had not worked; Heero had seen him with Ethan. Predicable.
They would talk in the morning, Heero had said. He had very little time to come up with an excuse and decide who he would choose - Ethan or Heero.
Duo did not sleep well.
- - -
'Morning' - although it was actually early afternoon - crept forward. It came slowly and was inevitable, Duo could feel it approaching and knew he could not escape. When it came he was forced out of his room.
Again, they ate in silence.
After the meal they sat at the table, empty plates pushed to the side and lukewarm, half-empty coffee cups before them.
"Well?" Heero said.
Duo spoke. "I thought just like you told me to," he began. "I couldn't come up with anything to do except tell you the whole story. So I will.
"Ethan and I are not dating. We only see each other at the club, and only about four times a week. It started around three months ago, and there hasn't been any off time.
"His name is Ethan Hart. I don't know how old he is or where he lives, his history, anything. That's just not the kind of relationship we have. We fuck every time we see each other, and he watches me, dances with me, buys me drinks, that type of thing. But there's little emotion involved and I'm pretty sure he's seeing other people. He doesn't love me.
"That, I guess, is all."
Heero asked, "What color are his eyes?"
Duo looked confused. "Hazel," he said, "you know, that green brown color."
And then Heero sat, watching Duo's face, his hands folded on the table, saying nothing. A fine mist of perspiration broke out along Duo's spine.
"Heero?" Duo said eventually.
"What now?" Heero asked. "Should I stay?"
"How would I know!" Duo jumped up from the table, outspoken, enraged, and not sure why. "You don't even know how serious you are about us, and you want me to make a decision like this? You want me to end the only relationship I've had since we split up, to end the only secure, comforting thing I have in my life?
"You know what I'm thinking? You know what option is looking good to me right now, Heero? I'll give you a hint: the answer's not you.
"Ethan takes care of me. You saw how he treated you - he's like that to anyone that threatens me or us. It's not love but it's better than anything else I got. It's all I can rely on nowadays, it's the only thing I understand!
"Not a chance I'll choose you over him, Heero. Not until I know that I won't be screwing myself by ending with Ethan and starting with you. Give me some assurance, some proof, and for now get the hell out of my business!"
Duo stormed out of the room, leaving Heero sitting at the table with his hands clasped and his coffee cooling. He still did not understand his anger.
