Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing. Never have, probably never will so don't sue me. I also don't own the show the Gundam boys put on. I also don't own the Renaissance Festival or the wonderful shows that they put on.
Authoress' notes: Nekessla helped me with this one.
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The Equestrian GamesBy Destiny Lockheart
Johanna came rushing into the stables. "Squires, you're on in five minutes, knights twenty. Hurry up!"
"For the last time, we're Gundam pilots, not knights!"
"You're knights for the day and that's all that matters to me." She turned and walked back down the trail to a field.
Erica finished putting the saddle on Scythe, a beautiful black Andulusian mare. She was flare jeans and a pine green shirt with a silver chain belt. She dusted her hands off and stepped out of the stall and into the aisle. "Hey, Sam, are you almost finished with Sand? We've got to get going."
Samantha stepped out of the stall and took one last look at her work. Sand was a tan Arabian gelding and right now, he was wearing a orange and black blanket under his saddle. Sam was wearing black flare pants, an orange baby t-shirt with Princess written on it and black shoes. "All finished. Sand is looking great for Halloween."
"Sam, it's mid-September. Why did you pick those colors anyway?" Sam opined her mouth to speak but Erica held up her hand. "Never mind, I 'm not sure I want to know. Go find Relena, I'll go drop something on George's head, then we grab the equipment and sprint down to the field as fast as we can."
"But I wanted to give Quatre a good luck kiss before the show started."
"Save it for the joust to the death. Right now, you have to tell Relena the show is starting"
"Alright." Samantha walked off in search of Relena and Erica walked in the other direction in search of George.
She found him outside of Silence's stall, looking very dazed and confused. "What did you do now?"
"I didn't do anything, Silence won't let me anywhere's near her."
"That horse is smart." She looked in that stall. The chestnut Clydesdale mare was leaning against the back wall with her teeth bared. Her tack was lying on the ground next to her. "George! You haven't even started to get her ready." She picked up the shovel next to the stall and smacked George alongside the head with it. "You're useless." She stepped inside and began to get Silence ready.
Samantha found Relena inside of Zero's stall, putting the finishing touches on his mane and tail. Zero was a white Thoroughbred stallion. "There all finished." Zero nudged her hand affectionately. Relena was wearing a gold skirt and a dark green shirt.
Sam cleared her throat. "Relena, the show is about to start."
Relena gave Zero a goodbye pat before joining Sam in the aisle. They walked towards the exit and when they got there, they waited. "That's strange, they should be here by now. Well, maybe not that George fellow but Erica should definitely be here."
"Erica was ready the last time I saw her. I'll go down to Silence's stall and see what's going on." As Sam neared Silence's stall, she saw George looking completely dazed and confused outside and muffled curses and threats to his life coming from the inside. She looked inside to see Erica placing Silence's saddle on her. "What happened? What did George do now?"
Erica buckled up the saddle and came to stand in the aisle in between George and Sam. "Idiot here," pointing to George, "didn't get Silence ready. He completely ignored the poor horse."
"Duck," Sam said, reaching for the rake beside her.
"Huh, why?" she asked, as she obeyed.
The rake came in contact with George's head. "I am mouse, hear me SQUEAK!"
"That's why," Sam said, replacing the rake. "George," she said warningly. "You'd better be there on time."
Both girls left him and rejoined Relena. "Let's go," Erica said, picking up the equipment needed for the show. The other two girls did the same and they walked to the arena.
George finally remembered who he was and what he was supposed to be doing. He hurried down the aisle and tried to pick the equipment up, dropping the rings several times.
Johanna glanced nervously around the field as more and more people began to crowd around it. She glanced at her watch for the fifth time and gulped. Where were those squires? More importantly, where were the king and queen? She decided it was best not to answer the second question. She sighed with relief when she saw the girls come from behind the fence. The first show would start in five minutes. Across the field from her, two trumpet players took the stage. Each girl went to their appropriate corners, each marked by a colored flag: Erica to blue and green, Relena to gold and green, and Samantha to orange and black.
Erica looked from her measly crowd of twenty-five to Relena's crowd of about one hundred. Of course, part of that could be because Relena's side was on a hill and people could sit down. She climbed and stood at the top of the fence, looking down at the person whose arms had previously occupied that spot. "Hi, how ya doing?" She looked at the other people. "All right everybody, listen up. We're in blue and green corner so that means we'll be cheering for Sir Duo. He'll be the one wearing blue and green besides me and if that's still not enough to identify him, he's the only one with a three foot long braid." She looked over her shoulder at the other squires. "Over there is Sir Heero and his squire Relena, and in the orange and black is Sir Quatre and his squire Sam. And over there in the far corner is," she pointed to the corner in question, "in yellow and red is Sir Trowa and his squire George. George eats his boogers." Everyone that heard her laughed and started making their own jokes about George. She looked to the King and Queen's stage and saw Johanna signaling it was time to begin. She jumped off the fence and grabbed the flag. It was half blue and half green and the blue side had an eagle on it. The pole was five feet long.
Relena looked the size of the crowd that had chosen Heero's corner and smiled. There were at least a hundred people sitting on the hill. "Hello, everyone. My name is Relena Peacecraft and I'm Sir Heero's squire. Since you're in the gold and green corner, you'll be cheering for him. In the other corners are Sir Duo and his squire Erica in blue and green, Sir Quatre and his squire Sam in orange and black, and Sir Trowa and his squire George in yellow and red. Feel free to boo the other knights and to throw rotten fruit at George should he come over here." She glanced over her shoulder and saw Johanna give the signal that the show was about to begin. She grabbed the flag out of its stand. It was on a pole five and a half feet long. The flag was gold and green with and eagle in the center.
Sam looked at the crowd that had gathered around the orange and black corner. There weren't many of them, but if one of them had a big mouth it shouldn't be much of a problem. "Listen up, I'm Samantha, squire to the incredibly hot Sir Quatre and the only other one dressed for Halloween. That's who you'll be cheering for. Now to learn about the people you're supposed to boo. Over there in the blue and green corner is Sir Duo and his squire Erica, in the gold and green corner is Sir Heero and his squire Relena, and across from us in the red and yellow is Sir Trowa and his squire George. George is wearing a shirt with a superman logo on it, but believe me, he's a super wimp. If he get close enough to hear, call him that." She looked over at Johanna who was signaling it was time for the show to start. Sam picked up Quatre's flag. It was black with an orange pumpkin in the center, and it was on a five foot seven inch pole.
George entered the arena looking dazed, but for once, not confused. As he walked to his yellow and red corner, he failed to notice that several people from Relena's corner wre coming to his, carrying baskets of rotten fruit between them. He walked over to the fence. "Hello every-" A rotten apple landed in his mouth. He pulled it out and threw the fruit back over the fence. "Let's try this aga-" Several rotten tomatoes hit him in the face before he could finish his sentence. He wiped them off with the back of his hand and tried to find out exactly who was throwing this at him. However, the baskets had been cleverly hidden behind small children, and anyone with half a brain would have been able to see them. Since we're still testing to see if George even has a brain, he didn't notice them. "Go Sir Trowa!" he called. A large watermelon hit him in the head. He tried to wipe it off but the seeds and juice stuck. He picked up the yellow and red flag, which was on a seven-foot pole, as Johanna signaled to begin.
Johanna cleared her throat. For such a little person, she had a loud voice. "Lords and Ladies of the court, please welcome their Majesties, King Zechs and Queen Noin."
As the crowd applauded, the female squires exchanged nervous glances. None of them had bothered telling the boys ho the committee had chosen to play the part of King and Queen. "Please welcome Sir Heero!" Johanna announced. Relena jogged to the center of the field and waved the flag. Heero went past on Zero on the opposite side from the King and Queen and, thankfully, was too far away to see who they were.
He pulled Zero to a stop in the corner as Relena walked back. "My people, I will win today, by kicking those other knights' asses."
The crowd cheered and someone yelled out, "Figuratively or literally?"
Heero thought for a moment. The script hadn't told him how to deal with questions like that. "Both." Zero began to twitter nervously as Johanna began to announce the next knight. Of course, it could have been due to the fact that he caught sight of George.
"All the way from Arabia, please welcome Sir Quatre." Sam took the orange and black flag to the center of the field.
Quatre rode Sand into his corner, which happened to be right by the entrance, so he also didn't see who the King and Queen were. "Gentle people, I promise not to hurt any of them too badly." Surprisingly, almost his entire crowd cheered. Sam cam back to their corner as Johanna began to announce the next knight.
"Everyone, put your hands together for Sir Duo." Just like the other two girls before her, Erica carried the flag to the center of the field.
Duo rode in on Scythe, passing through the middle of the field, and he was close enough to see who the King and Queen were. When he saw who was there, he stopped Scythe quickly, causing the horse to rear. "What the hell?" He struggled to get his horse under control.
"Hey, what do you think you're doing?" Erica asked, hitting Scythe's butt with the flagpole, causing the horse to bolt to the corner. Erica followed as Duo gave his speech to the crowd. "Good people, I don't care whether or not I win or lose, just so long as I get to hurt the King."
The crowd cheered. "Yeah, treason!" "Kill you're king!"
Erica stood beside Scythe and pulled Duo's braid. "What do you think you're doing? That's not your line."
"I can't help it. The man tried to kill all of us one too many times. Who recommended them to play the part of King and Queen anyway?"
"Well, it wasn't me, and it wasn't Relena, and it definitely wasn't Sam, you know how she hates Zechs." She paused and stared at the yellow and red corner. "That only leaves… George."
Johanna cleared her throat to announce the last knight. "Finally, but most certainly not least, the amazing Sir Trowa." George tried to run to the center of the field with his flag but he tripped over the long pole and fell flat on his face. Trowa came riding in on Silence, missing George but knocking even more dirt onto him, which in turn, clung to the watermelon goo.
Trowa pulled Silence to a halt. "Little children, I have just spent the last hour at the pub!" A male voice could be heard shouting "Yeah!" as Trowa started to topple off his horse.
Johanna looked out across the field and sweat-dropped. This was probably going to be a huge disaster. She turned around to look at Zechs and Noin. "Could you two stand for this next part, please?" They did and she turned her attention to the knights and squires. Trowa had thankfully managed to regain his balance. "Will the squires and knights please present their flags so that their Majesties may witness your colors?" Nobody moved. "Squires, get over your fear of your knights and present the stupid flags already!"
This time the squires went running to the center of the field to stand in a circle, backs to each other, facing their own corners. "This is going to be bad," Relena whispered to Erica. "Heero hates my brother, and so do the rest of the guys."
Erica nodded. "I agree, things are going to get real ugly for George."
"Why George?" Sam asked. "Besides the obvious."
"Do you really think they'd take their anger out on us? They love us," Erica said, looking to each side of her.
"You're right," Relena said softly.
"I don't know Erica," Sam said. "You'd better watch out. Duo might decide to hit you with that braid of his a few times."
"Don't forget," Erica winked, "I have my own braid I can fight back with."
"The knights are coming," Relena stated, silencing both of them.
Johanna watched with little amusement as the knights picked up the wrong flag and had to go around the circle several imtes before they got the right one. Five minutes later, they all the right flag and they lined the horses up in a straight line with the squires kneeling before them in front of the King and Queen. The looks on their faces were priceless.
Heero tried to grab his trusty gun, only to glare even more at them with the realization that is wasn't there. Quatre looked confused and asked "What are they doing here?"
And Trowa, poor drunken Trowa who had spent too much time at the pub held up a hand and said, "Wow, I didn't know you two were King and Queen. Hell, I didn't even know you two were married. Why didn't you invite us to the wedding?"
Noin nodded and smiled. "We'll talk about that later, Sir Trowa." In a lower voice she asked Zechs, "Why are we here?"
"The committee has promised OZ two new mobile suits that are guaranteed to be able to defeat Wing Zero and the rest of the Gundams."
"Exactly who will get these two mobile suits?"
"Treize and I will, my dear. Now continue smiling, put on a good show, and they may even assassinate the pilots for us."
"I thought OZ had broken up and Treize was dead," she muttered.
Johanna pretended to ignore the conversation behind her. It was of no importance to her, and, besides, the only pilot she cared about was Wufei.
Heero continued to stare Zechs down, but since he was weaponless he decided to try Relena's approach and talk. "What are you two doing here?"
Zechs opened his arms to indicate the crowd around them. "The same thing all these people are doing here, waiting to see you four knights compete in equestrian games."
The squires stood up to talk to their knights. "Come on, Quatre, please," Sam said.
"You don't have to worry about me. I'd rather not fight them anyway." Samantha tried to hug him but from where she was standing all she could manage was to hug Sand. So she settled for the horse, making a mental note to hug Quatre later.
Meanwhile, Relena was having a harder time in convincing Heero. "Heero, please, behave yourself. They're not here to cause trouble or they would have done it by now. Why can't you be more like Trowa?"
Heero grunted. "Trowa is heavily drunk right now or her would have had the same reaction."
"Okay, bad example." She thought for a moment. "Be more like Quatre. Heero, this is supposed to be fun, so play your part and have fun."
She pleaded with her eyes and he eventually gave in. After all, we all know that Heero can't resist Relena. "All right, but only because you asked me to."
Erica folded her arms across her chest and stared the same way Scythe was facing. "Duo…" she said warningly.
"Yes, ma'm, I'll behave." He rolled his eyes. "God, I wish I would have stayed with Hilde."
"I heard that," she said, still not looking at him.
"You were supposed to, copycat." He tugged at her braid.
"Hey, watch it!" she said, finally turning towards him. "I know where you sleep at night and I'm sure I could find a pair of scissors somewhere."
"Is that a threat, cat?" he asked leaning closer to her.
Personally, Johanna was getting fed up with all three displays so she shouted as loud as she could. "Enough! Knights, squires, get back to your appointed corners now!" All conversations that had been going on stopped and everyone turned to stare at her. "Please," she added meekly. The knights turned their horses and trotted back to their corners with the squires jogging alongside them. Zechs and Noin sat down on their thrones and Johanna sat between them, clearly embarrassed.
"We shall start with the ring game," Heero called across the field to the other knights. Relena picked up the rings from her pile of equipment, then walked to her first position. Sam and Erica did the same without a word from their knights.
"Squire, picked up those circular thingies," Trowa ordered.
"Circular thingies?" George asked.
"Yes, the circular thingies you squires toss up in the air and we knights catch them on our stick thingies."
George began to fear more for his life than he ever had in the presence of Sam or Erica. He picked up the rings, gulped, then joined the other squires in the arena.
It soon became clear to the audience that the point of the game was for the knights to get the rings on their lances. Ten minutes later, when the squires ran out of rings, Duo, Heero, and Quatre had all of theirs, while Trowa had managed to get one through some weird twist of fate. Since there was a tie, it would be settled by a much larger ring being thrown into the air and whichever knight managed to catch it would win. Sam and Relena walked back to their corners; while George limped, battered and bruised from being hit by Trowa, back to his. Erica stood on one of the long sides of the arena, slightly off center, with a large ring in her hand. The knights lined up their horses. The pilots rode their horses across the field, but since Trowa was drunk, he ran Silence into Sand, causing both of them to fall out of the competition. Erica threw the ring high into the air, and Duo and Heero caught it at the same time. Unfortunately, Trowa tried to get back into the competition, slamming Silence into Scythe, causing Heero to be the one with the ring.
Duo rode back to his corner as Trowa went back to his, knocking George over in the process. While this was going on, Heero rode to the center of the arena, holding the ring up for everyone to see. "Your majesties," he called grimacing, "I am victorious."
Queen Noin stood up. "Congratulations, Sir Heero. Here's your prize." She tossed him a garland of white flowers, ewhich Zero caught. Heero struggled with his horse for a moment, but he managed to get it away with most of the flowers still intact "Present this to your queen of love and beauty."
"Hey, Heero," Duo called. "Make sure you pick a queen of love and beauty without a mustache this time!"
Heero merely glared at him as he rode Zero back to his corner. He made a show of looking at the girls crowding around the fence, and there were a lot to choose from, then turned and gave the garland to Relena. Everyone in the crowd went "awwwww."
"Duom would you have picked me as your queen of love and beauty?" Erica asked.
"No, I would have picked her instead." He pointed to a girl in the crowd. Surprisingly enough, it was Hilde
Freeze frame
Destiny walks in and looks at Hilde. "Whoa, wait a second? Who let here in her?" she asks, pointing to Hilde. When no one answers her, she shrugs and picks up a giant pencil with a huge eraser. "Oh well." She erases Hilde and draws a little girl of seven years old in her place. "That's better." Destiny steps out and the story resumes.
Story resumes
Erica looked in the direction Duo was pointing and smiled. "That's because you're sweet and you would want to make the little girl feel special."
Duo nodded. "Right." Both of them were completely oblivious to the fact that something strange had just happened.
"Quatre," Sam asked, "am I you're queen of love and beauty?"
"Of course," he answered, smiling down at her.
"Have I told you how much I love you and how hot you are?"
"Not today, no."
"George," Trowa said, looking straight ahead.
"Hmm," George murmured, wondering what it would be like to be named somebody's queen of love and beauty.
"I would never pick you as my queen of love and beauty no matter how drunk I was." George pouted.
"Heero," Relena whispered. "What are you doing? This isn't part of the script."
"No, the script says I'm give this to a little girl." He indicated the crowd surrounding the fence. "Do you see any little girls out there?" Relena looked at the crowd closest to the fence. They were all teenage girls, some pouting, most simply drooling over Heero. "See, I had to break the script the script anyway." This time he spoke loud enough for everyone to hear. "Her name be Relena."
"All hail Relena, queen of love and beauty!" the other knights and squires cheered, except for Trowa who said something along the lines of "All ale remedy, made of liquor and beer!" Thankfully, he wasn't loud enough for many people to hear.
Heero rode his horse to the center of the arena. "I challenge you imbeciles to a race."
"One question, what's an imbecile?" Trowa asked.
"It means brave warrior," Duo offered when Heero hesitated.
"Than truly, I am the greatest imbecile," Trowa responded. Everyone except George rolled their eyes.
"I challenge you all to the race," Heero continued, "of many things in the way."
"Many things in the way," the other knights repeated so that their individual corners could hear. "What?" they all asked in unison, turning to their squires.
"Obstacles you fools," Heero called. "We shall cut through things, jump over things and kill unsuspecting members of the audience."
"And kill unsuspecting members of the audience!" the knights repeated. "I'm hungry," Duo added to Erica. She tooke the lance off of him and hit him in the back of the head with it. This caused him to fall off Scythe.
"What's going on over there?" Quatre asked Sam.
"Duo's probably talking about food again."
Duo painfully crawled back onto Scythe. "Damn, girl," he said rubbing the back of his head, "you're cold." This time he ducked as the lance came swinging at his head. "You miss-" He didn't get to finish his statement as the lance came in contact with the top of his head. "Oww!"
Heero laughed (for once). "Sir Duo, are you having problems with your squire again?"
"Just a few," he admitted. "I can handle her as long as she stays with the wooden stick. I should be fine." He leaned back in fear as he saw her next weapon. "Whoa, put the flagpole down, please."
"Erica!" Sam yelled across the arena. "You can abuse Duo later! Right now, we have a show to put on!"
Erica reluctantly put the flagpole back as the crowd let out a disappointed sigh. Heero cleared his throat. "Back to the race! This race will be run in three legs!"
"Three legs!" the other knights repeated. They all looked down to each side, apparently counting how many legs they had. "How is that happening?" Quatre asked. "Yeah, how?" the others agreed.
"Three sections, you morons." Heero sighed. He knew it was mainly part of the script, but did they all have to act so stupid? "The first section will be run by two knights!"
"Two knights!"
Heero frowned. The constant repetition of everything he said was starting to get on his nerves. "The second section will be run by two knights!"
"Two knights!"
Heero resisted the urge to kill something or, preferably, someone. "And the third section shall be run be all four knights!"
"All knights!"
"The first section shall be run by myself and Sir-Drinks-A-Lot. Sir Quatre and Sir Duo, you shall take the second leg."
"I'm going to win," Duo said, directing Scythe to in front of the King and Queen's thrones. "My horse has the fastest speed."
"His horse does speed," Quatre said, pulling Sand up alongside Scythe.
"Very funny," Duo muttered.
Heero and Trowa led their horses to the starting spot. "Before we begin, does anybody have anything we can use to mark the end of the race?"
"I do," Erica said, pulling a pair of pink bunny boxers seemingly out of nowhere. She jogged across the field to the spot tht had been declared the end of the race.
"Duo," Heero called, "you might want to try to win those back." He turned his attention to Trowa. "Sir Trowa, are you ready?" Trowa dumbly nodded. "All right, on my mark. One, two –" Heero stopped counting because Silence was already a good twenty feet ahead of them. "Zero, let's go." Zero took off after Silence.
"Hey, Sir Trowa's cheating!" Quatre yelled.
"Don't worry, Sir Heero will catch up to him and teach that drunken fool a lesson he'll never forget."
"Duo, you're not supposed to tell them the script!"
"Script? What script?"
Zero chased after Silence as the crowd cheered Heero on. Two wooden poles stuck in the ground that the knights had to cut were the first obstacles. Heero managed his with ease, and Trowa cut of some of Silence's mane without getting within a foot of the pole. The next obstacle was a fence the horses had to jump over. Since the horses were the ones in charge of this stunt, they both made it over. As soon as the first horse hit the ground, the other two knights started their race. The first challenge was to throw their swords into a bale of hay. Both made it with ease, though Quatre's was slightly closer to the center. They had the same jump the other two had and Sand jumped over it with a grand form. Scythe's back foot hit the top of the fence and she landed with a jolt.
All four knights raced now, in a straight run around the field with no more obstacles. Quatre was in the lead. Duo was second and Heero pulled his braid to slow him down. The audience and Sam cheered. However, at the end of the race, Duo was in first place, thereby winning back his boxers. "Hey, do I win a prize?" he asked, bringing Scythe before the King and Queen.
"Yes," Zechs said with a grin, "you may keep those." He pointed to the boxers.
Duo took one look at the pink bunny boxers then threw them over to Heero. "Merry Christmas, Heero, and a Happy New Year."
Heero caught them then looked disgustedly at Duo. "Why would I want your boxers? They're pink and have bunnies on them."
"They're not mine," Duo replied, directing a limping Scythe back to the blue and green corner. It was obvious that no one believed him. He saw Erica walking towards them. "I see your coming to make sure your brave warrior is safe."
"I'm not here to see you, narcissist," she replied, grabbing Scythe's bridle. "I'm here to sure Scythe is okay. She hit that fence really hard and she was limping during the race." She took Scythe into the farthest reaches of the corner and knelt down next to her.
Heero took another look at the boxers then threw them over to Trowa. Silence caught them, then swiveled her head to face Trowa. Trowa took them from her and gave them to George. "Squire, dispose of these." George took a long look at them and proceeded to put them in his back pocket. As soon as he did, he got pelted with rotten fruit.
"Knights, to the center!" Three of the knights rode their horses to the center of the arena. "Duo," Heero called. "Can your horse finish this competition?"
Erica stood up and dusted herself off. "You're going to be just fine, Scythe," she said, rubbing the horse's nose. "You're one tough girl. That's why you're my war steed. Now, go out there and show them what you're made of."
"Sure, the horse gets wished good luck," Duo muttered as Scythe trotted off. Suddenly, he realized that she wasn't limping. "Scythe, you traitor! It was all just an act, wasn't it?" It sounded to him like Scythe was laughing at him.
"I hope your luck improves, Duo," Quatre stated as Duo joined the circle.
"I challenge you knights to another competition," Heero said. "Something more dangerous this time."
"I know," Trowa called. "How about, running with scissors?"
"The drunk actually remembered his line," Heero muttered under his breath.
At the same time, Quatre said, "No, that's too dangerous."
"I know!" Duo yelled. "How 'bout we see who can stare directly at the sun the longest?"
All four knights looked at the sun at the same time. Within a millisecond, they all covered their eyes with their arms. Trowa was blinking, probably because he actually did look directly at the sun. "All right, you pansies," Heero said. "Since none of you can come up with anything, I challenge you to a joust!"
"We accept!" The other knights returned to their corners to prep themselves.
"Squire," Trowa called as Silence approached their corner. "Water." George picked up the mug of water and handed it to Trowa. Trowa took a sip of the water then dropped the rest on George's head.
"Here you go, Quatre," Sam said, handing him the water mug.
"Thanks." He took it from her, smiled and glanced around at the other knights.
"Squire," Duo called as Scythe trotted into their corner. "Be obedient for once and give me some water."
"I don't know," she said with a conspiring look on her face. She turned to the audience. "Should I give it to him?"
"Yeah!"
She shrugged. "All right, you asked for it." She made a move as if to give the cup to him but at the last minute splashed it in his face. She laughed. "You asked for waster but you never specified how you wanted it given to you."
"I'll admit, I've been defeated. Now give me the mug, right side up, with whatever water's left still in it." She sulked but handed the mug to him.
Zero and Heero went slowly back to their corner. Relena was waiting for them, a mug of water in her hands. "Heero, wouldn't you like something to drink?"
"No, thanks. I must retain the fact that I'm not like those other fools." She handed him his lance and shield instead. "Thank you, squire. I shall see you after the joust."
"Good luck, Heero!"
"Let the joust begin!" Johanna called from her spot, finally daring to speak again.
"Good luck, Quatre," Sam whispered as he took the lance from her.
"Thanks," he called back over his shoulder as Zero and Sand charged each other. Both knights scored perfect hits, but neither fell off their horse.
"Wish me luck," Duo said to the audience as he prepared Scythe.
"We don't wish you luck, we wish you a miracle!"
"That's encouraging," Duo muttered as Scythe and Silence charged at each other. It didn't take long for him to realize that Silence was on a collision course with Scythe. He tried to move Scythe out of the way, but the horses collided, knocking both knights off.
Trowa stood up first. "I'll kill that bastard for running into my beloved Silence for that."
Silence continued to run in a straight line and Scythe turned around on sight of George. Erica grabbed onto Silence's bridle, somehow getting the wild mare to stop. She also caught hold of Scythe, bringing both to the blue and green corner. " Nice catch," Quatre called from the gold and green corner. Erica nodded in acknowledgement. "Guess I'm up against Heero again."
Zero and Sand charged each other again and at the same time, Trowa tackled Duo. This time, Quatre "fell" off his horse, leaving Heero as the only one still on his horse. Quatre pulled Trowa off of Duo. "I'll take care of him if you can get Heero off that horse," Quatre suggested to Duo.
Heero looked over at Erica. "Say a prayer, girl. Your boyfriend's going down." Zero charged the knights, knocking down Trowa and Quatre. When he passed Duo, Duo grabbed onto his arm, bringing Heero onto the ground. Zero obediently ran back to Relena. The next few minutes were spent with the knights trying to beat each other up.
"Enough!" Johanna yelled. "This is a disgrace to yourselves and your kingdom!" All knights stopped and stared at her. "Meet back here at one o'clock for the King's Challenge Joust!"
Heero walked over to Zero and mounted. "My people," he called to the audience. "I shall be back." Quatre mounted Sand and he and Heero left the arena. Trowa simply walked out of the arena.
"Hey, you forgot Silence!" Erica called after him. Duo got a running start and tried to jump onto Scythe from behind. Note the use of the word "tried." "Want help?" Erica asked as Duo limped over to her. He nodded, in too much pain to even speak. Erica helped him onto Scythe, then mounted Silence. "When we return, good people, he shall be able to talk again." Erica and Duo left the arena with the other squires following them. Except for George who was getting pelted with oranges.
The crowd began to walk away as Johanna followed the King and Queen off their stage. "I finally get to see my Wu-wu-chan!" she yelled happily as she raced down the trail.
The Gundam Wing Narrator steps in. "Who are the mysterious council members? Will Trowa ever become sober again? Will George ever get a break? Who is Wu-wu-chan? And when did Zechs and Noin get married? Find out next time on The Renaissance Festival Gundam Style: Chaos in the Stables!"
