Title: The Nancy Tribe
Author: his_luv_pet
Series: BtVS
Part: 2/?
Rating: PG-13 to R
Codes: R/J Amnesia!Verse
Summary: Where do we go from here? Literally, how to stay in the Amnesia!Verse without totally blowing the plotline to hell. We already know we have to suspend disbelief, now don't we? After that, the Adventures of Randy & Joan & the rest of the Nancy Tribe.
Spoilers: Tabula Rasa -- *Really* AU after that!
Disclaimer: [Insert obligatory funny disclaimer, homage to Joss, and unworthiness statement here.]
Feedback: Tell me -- his_luv_pet@yahoo.com
Website: http://www.geocities.com/his_luv_pet
Posting: Let me know...then sure!

A/N: OK...This part's tedious background and setup, please bear with me. And, what's with Willow's mojo? Utinam fabulam tabula rasa veritas roughly, I mean roughly, translated is: That clean slate I wished for is now the truth. What it means to the story is...whatever *identity* the members of the Nancy tribe thought was theirs, is now, in fact theirs. Now, no one knows any more than what they did prior to that spell and it's permanent. What can I say? I've always been evil, baby.... ;)

***

Willow, Tara, Alex, and Dawn sat at a large round table in the back of the shop. They were yawning and looking a bit disheveled. Dawn had her head down on the table, cradled in her arms; Tara was periodically stroking her hair.

Anya was fussing behind the counter, and then came round with a pile of paper plates and a couple forks. "No napkins," she reported with mild disgust. "When Rupert gets back with the doughnuts, you guys be sure to eat over your plates. I don't want to be cleaning up crumbs all day."

"Yes, Anya," Alex replied with a sigh. Geez, this chicka sure could get on a guy's nerves. He wondered how Rupert could stand her.

Just then, Rupert appeared through the door with a large box of donuts. "Found the doughnut shop, just round the corner," he cheerfully if unnecessarily informed them. "Didn't know everyone's favorites, so I just got some of each."

"Any raspberry jelly ones?" Joan called out as she walked in from the back room, half yawning.

"Joan," Rupert greeted her with a mix of pleasantry and trepidation. "Where's Randy...uh, I mean, good morning."

Joan nodded in the direction of the back room and said, "He's still sleeping like the dead." She giggled at her joke and snagged a raspberry jelly doughnut with a sound of triumph.

"Use a plate," Anya called from behind the counter where she was counting out the till to begin the day.

Joan looked at Alex, who nodded with authority and handed her the plate and said, "She Who Must Be Obeyed has spoken." Joan giggled a little at that and sat down next to Dawn.

Gently tapping her shoulder, Joan spoke to Dawn, "Hey, Dawn. You want a doughnut?"

"Ummmff," mumbled Dawn as she looked up blearily. She perked up at the sight of the doughnuts and said, "Any raspberry ones?" The whole table grinned at this as she plucked one from the pile. "What," she intoned peevishly, biting into the pastry.

"Plate," remarked Joan. Alex handed one over and they all munched in relative silence.

Rupert finished his doughnut and looked at Joan. "So, how did last night go, Joan? Did anything seem more familiar to you?"

Joan sat back in her chair and thought for a moment. "In the beginning, I was just really confused, but after we started fighting the vamps, it just seemed normal. I mean, not normal, but really familiar kind of not normal. If you see what I mean?" her voice rising.

Rupert rubbed his brow, perhaps it was a headache brought on by lack of sleep. "I understand you to mean that as the night wore one, your actions became more familiar to you?"

"That's it," Joan agreed happily. "We kicked some serious vampire booty last night. Major stakeage and all. Randy was great. Kinda freaked me out when he went all Lumpyface, but boy, can he fight. Totally toasted about 8 vamps all by himself," she nodded and continued eating.

"Lumpyface?" Willow asked.

"Yeah, so totally surprised me. I mean, what's Joan the Vampire Slayer doing hanging with a vamp and all, you know?" Joan said shaking her head. "But, he's like a noble vampire, a soul and all that. On a quest do good, help the helpless, right wrongs, and all..." she trailed off as she comprehended the horror in everyone's faces. Well Dawn didn't look horrified, more like fascinated.

"Randy's a vamp," Dawn exclaimed. "Cool!"

Then all sorts of mayhem ensued with everyone talking at each other, the volume rising until they were all shouting at each other.

"What's all this noise about then?" called Randy as he stumbled from the back room. "Can't a vamp rest in a bit of peace?"

Dead silence fell over the room. Then, everyone, except for Joan and Dawn, scrambled to where the rest of the stakes and a few crosses had been piled in a corner. Joan took one look at the group and pushed Dawn over behind the counter and told her stay there. She sprang over in front of Randy and yelled, "Nobody hurts Randy!"

The group paused in shock as Joan held out one arm in front of her, the other grasping Randy's shoulder. Randy looked puzzled and still a bit sleepy, his hair mussed and curly, so different from its pristine smoothness of the night before. "Joan?" he said uncertainly in a low undertone. "What's going on?"

"They didn't know you were a vamp, either," she replied. "Relax, I won't let them hurt you." The group continued to gawk at the couple in silence. Dawn was grinning from ear to ear from her vantage point behind the counter.

"I think that now might be a good time to tell them that *I'm* not going hurt them, Joan," Randy observed, glancing at the terrified humans. "I'm not going to, you know," he called over to them.

"How do we know that," Alex questioned severely. "You're a vampire -- kills things, drinks their blood, hello? Any of this ringing a bell?"

"But I'm a noble vampire," Randy responded passionately. "A vampire with a soul, and a mission of redemption, and a need to do good..."

"Yeah, yeah," Joan interrupted. "He doesn't eat humans, he helps kill vamps, he's my boy...,uh,...friend, and nobody kills him. Got it?" Randy smiled a bit at this.

"How can this be?" Rupert walked over to Randy, tilting his head and looking at him sadly.

"I don't know," Randy replied in a low voice to him, his face falling. "I just found out last night when we were fighting those vampires who tried to get into the shop." He looked at his father and felt awful. "I'm sorry, Dad," he whispered finally, looking down miserably at the floor in shame. Joan's hand slid down from his shoulder and grasped Randy's. He looked up at her, tears in his eyes. She looked back, not saying anything, but just being there for him.

"I can't say that I'm not disappointed," Rupert said finally with a sigh. "I just don't understand how you didn't know," he paused thoughtfully. "But, then again, none of us knew anything when we woke up, did we?" He reached over to touch Randy's shoulder. "I guess *I* owe you an apology then, don't I?"

Randy looked at Rupert. With a hitched intake of needless breath, he said, "It's all right. I understand if you don't want me around..."

"That's not it at all," Rupert said quickly, unconsciously stroking the boy's shoulder. "I guess I just don't know how I'm supposed to help you, and I feel...well, helpless is the best way to describe it. And, I rather fancy I don't like that feeling when it concerns you, son," he finished with an emotional voice.

"Dad,..." his voice cracked and Rupert pulled him into his embrace and held him tightly.

"Don't worry about it, Randy," Rupert said, pulling back slightly from the boy. "We'll get through this together."

"Together," Anya echoed and came up on Rupert's other side.

Joan stood to one side, feeling really sad and left out, and was turning to go over to Dawn when Randy called, "Joan?" in a voice that was achingly gentle and questioning at the same time. Joan turned to see Randy's head tilted to one side, his inquiring look flowing from his steady blue eyes. She felt her heart flip and she stopped.

"Yeah?" she finally said, the sound catching in voice.

He looked at her for what seemed to be a long time, then moved a step closer to her, then stopped, his gaze imploring her to come to him. Joan searched for the reason she felt so torn, and much like a wounded animal trying to trust again, she moved forward toward Randy. He stepped closer again, and so did she. Finally, they were face to face and they stopped. Who moved first, no one in the room could say afterward. They just seemed to melt into one another's embrace and held each other tightly. Rupert and Anya stood together, arms around each other, smiling at the two.

"Uh, I hate to rain on anybody's parade," Alex began. "But we still have to figure out where we live, work, go to school," he looked at Dawn, "and probably where we can get the deadboy here something to eat so he doesn't feel like making us snackage."

Randy looked over at Alex and said sincerely, "I'm not going to eat you or anyone, Alex."

Alex looked at Randy for quite a while; the room was still and expectant. Somehow, everyone knew that this was going to be the sticking point, and they waited to see what Alex would do. Alex gave a little laugh and a shrug that seemed very familiar to him. "OK. I believe you," he said simply. And that was that. No one else questioned Randy's intentions. It didn't seem strange to anyone, just normal in a very weirdness way.

***

Rupert decided that Anya would open the shop as they normally would, having ascertained the business hours from the small sign on the door, and he would assist the others in finding out the necessities of life.

"I think we should concentrate on where we live," offered Willow. "What I mean is, maybe we can find out something more about ourselves if we do that. At least it's Saturday, so no school for a couple of days."

"Sounds good to me," replied Rupert. He looked at the others, who all agreed.

"Well, I'm not going to be any use in the daylight," Randy commented with mild disgust.

Joan came over to him and said, "Don't worry about it. You're more of a night person, like me. And if tonight is anything like last night, I'm going to need your help."

"You've got it, Joan," Randy smiled at her. Joan beamed back at him, feeling a tugging at her emotions that always accompanied any interaction with her partner.

"Hey, Randy," Alex came over. "You need human blood, or can it be any blood?"

"I think I just need blood," Randy replied after thinking a bit. "I think I *prefer* human blood, but," he looked up at Alex with a smile. "Any port in a storm and all that."

"Gotcha," Alex said, quirking his eyebrows and turned, mumbling to himself, "I had to ask."

"Hey, I think I found something," Anya called from behind the counter. "It's marked 'Revello House Bills'." She looked up and gestured excitedly, "I think I found where Willow, Tara, Dawn, and Joan live!"

They all crowded round and looked expectantly at Anya.

"See, look here," she pointed to Rupert, who had come round the edge of the counter to look at the files' content. "This telephone bill is separated into sections -- marked Willow and Tara's, Dawn's, and general." Anya looked up and said approvingly, "Apparently you don't make any long distance calls, Joan. Very sensible and thrifty of you."

"Thanks, I think," replied Joan wryly. Anya beamed back at her and continued pointing out the bills and documents. They pieced together that there were a lot of bills and repairs that needed to be done.

"Wow, how come we owe like a million dollars to everyone?" Joan said puzzled.

"Here it is," Rupert scanned an important looking document and looked up at the group. "Apparently, the owner of the house on Revello Drive, someone named, hmmm, Joyce Summers, has recently died. The bills appear to have piled up as a result of her illness and death. Oh, it also appears that there was a Buffy Summers, who died a short time after Joyce."

"Oh, that's too bad," Tara exclaimed.

He looked at them and offered, "I think that you were Ms. Buffy Summer's tenants. She probably opened up her home as a rooming house to help pay the bills."

"Well, what do we do now?" Joan asked of no one in particular. "It sure sounds like we're going to be out on our ears even before we even get back to our house."

"No," Anya said, scanning even more documents. "It appears that Rupert and I have invested in the house and have loaned a substantial," she paused to look hard at Rupert here, " amount and paid the necessary outstanding bills." She looked up at the others. "That's probably why we have these bills here, to straighten them out," she finished triumphantly.

"It sounds just like a job for you, my dear," Rupert said smiling slightly.

"Well, what about Mr. Giles, Willow, and Tara head over to this house and check things out," Alex offered. "Dawn and I could look into finding something for Randy to eat, and you guys could rest for tonight," he looked at Randy and Joan.

"Sounds good to me," Randy said, looking gratefully at Alex. "Thanks, mate. I could really use some more sleep." Alex just nodded at Randy.

"Sleep would be of the good," Joan stretched liked a cat and both Randy and Alex's eyes zeroed in on her instantly. Randy turned to glare a bit at Alex and Alex just shrugged as if to say 'Hey, might be your girl, but I'm not blind'. Randy relaxed and gave him a purely male grin of comradery. Alex grinned back.

"OK, enough testosterone, you two," muttered Joan and she grabbed Randy on the way back to the room with the mats. "Be good, Dawn," she called back to the girl who was standing next to Alex.

"Good day, all," Randy called pleasantly to the group, who echoed back his salutation.

Alex and Dawn left to explore the possibilities of obtaining blood. They exited the shop having an animated discussion about exactly where they could go and how to approach a clerk about it.

"Don't know that I'll ever get used to it," Rupert was cleaning his glasses. "But, I suppose I'll just have to deal, now won't I."

Willow gave Rupert a look at his word usage as he replaced his glasses. "I'm not that old, Willow," he responded to her unspoken comment.

"No, you aren't, Mr. Giles," she nodded, willing to go along.

"Call me Rupert," he hastened to add.

"Sure thing," Willow replied straight-faced, then turned to walk with Tara to the door. Their giggles could be heard as they exited the shop.

"I'll call you when we get to the house, dear," Rupert called to Anya, wrapping his dignity like a cloak about him.

"You'll need the number," she replied and held out a business card.

"Thanks," Rupert said. "Don't know what I'd do without you." He gave her a kiss on the forehead and turned to join the girls.

"Not going to get a chance to try, Rupie," Anya responded with a slightly maniacal glee. She turned to call the airline about cashing in a one-way ticket to England.

End Part 2