Unforgettable - Part 8
By Jill
Monday, September 4th, 6.00 p.m. Los Angeles
It was quiet in Buffy's apartment, now that she and Angel were sitting on
her sofa in the living room, her head resting on his shoulder, her eyes
closed. The week had gone by in a blur.
The FBI had taken Eunice Montez into protective custody and they would
provide her with a new identity as soon as possible. In return Eunice would
give all information she had, and regarding the fact that she'd been living
more than 20 years with one of the most wanted drug dealers in South
America, it was quite a lot. Actually the FBI could hardly believe their
luck and were only too willing to help Eunice in any way possible.
The coroner had confirmed their suspicion that Riley had been shot with a
wide-range weapon and so they had no idea who the killer could be. The whole
department was investigating his murder but so far they had only pulled
blanks. The news that Riley had shot Mike had spread rapidly and to spare
Buffy the whisper behind her back and the curious looks, Giles had given her
several days off.
Buffy was grateful for it. There was a lot to do regarding Riley's funeral,
because although they'd been in the process of a divorce and were not living
with each other anymore, legally she was still his wife and responsible for
all the things that had to be done. Angel was by her side the whole time,
helping her whenever she needed him, taking care of formalities, or just
cooking dinner for her.
Riley's funeral had been a quiet affair. His brother, Connor, came with his
family and with the help of the FBI they even arranged for Connor to meet
his sister Eunice for a while. A lot of cops attended Riley's funeral. The
fact that he was responsible for the death of Buffy's brother didn't present
a problem. Nobody doubted the words of a dying man that it had been an
accident and so the file of Mike Danicki was officially closed.
"It's the first time in a week that I have the feeling that I'm able to
breathe." Buffy looked up and her eyes met Angel's, "The whole week was
so... unreal," she shook her head, "I don't know. I still can't believe he's
dead. Just like that," she snapped her fingers.
"I know," he replied quietly, reaching out and taking her hand. "There's so
much I can't quite grasp. He killed Mike. It's so... strange. I didn't
suspect him. Not for a second. When Mike went down that night, I was sure it
had been one of the bank robbers. Then when the report came, telling us it
was my weapon..." he trailed off and shook his head. He had still trouble
understanding what had happened. All the things Riley had said to him before
he had died. About his permanent jealousy. When had it started, Angel
wondered. When had friendship changed into something ugly?
"Maybe I should feel sorry for him," Buffy mused, frowning slightly, "Maybe
I should, but I can't. He did so many terrible things. And I am not talking
about Mike. I can believe that was an accident. And I can even believe he
suppressed what he knew, that happens, I've seen it more than once. But
later. When he found out about Mike. He lied to me, Angel. He didn't even
try to tell me."
He was quiet for a long time, and then suddenly said, "I wonder-" but broke
off again.
"You wonder, what?" she probed.
"You remember the day when he gave you Mike's file," it wasn't really a
question. Angel didn't doubt for a moment that Buffy remembered the day.
"Yeah, sure. Why?"
"I wonder if he wanted you to read it. Maybe he... maybe he wanted you to
know," he shook his head and released a long breath and ran a hand through
his hair, then over his face. "God, Riley was so screwed up. Maybe I'm just
trying to find the good in him. I don't know. Maybe a part of me just
refuses to see him for what he was."
"But that's just the point," she replied, reaching for the coffee cup on the
table, "Who was he? I think I've asked myself that question a million times
this week. And you know what? I still don't have the right answer. Maybe
we'll never know."
Angel was about to say something when the doorbell rang. He wanted to get
up, but Buffy shook her head and went herself. She smiled when she saw her
visitor, "Connor, come in," she invited. "It's good to see you. We barely
had a minute to talk."
"That's the reason I came. Lenore, the kids and I, we're going to fly back
to Washington tomorrow morning. And... well, I thought we should talk." He
followed her to the living room and when he spotted Angel, he smiled as
well, "Angel, so good to see you," he said and the two men hugged. "Although
I wish..."
"I know," Angel replied with a nod. "I wish the same. Never in a million
years I would've pictured our meeting like this."
"No," Connor agreed. "And there's something I need to say first. Angel, I
had no idea what was going on when Riley married Buffy. I'm sorry I nearly
threw you out of the church that afternoon."
Angel chuckled slightly when Buffy gasped, "You did, what?"
Connor had to smile, "I... well, I saw him coming from your room that
afternoon and... we had a fight. Not with fists, but I shouted at him and -"
"Connor," Angel interrupted him, "Forget it, will you. It's so long ago. It
seems unreal today."
"Yes it does, doesn't it," Riley's brother said with a slight shake of his
head. "He changed so much the last two years. I had no idea what happened,"
he laughed harshly, "Well, now we all know. He killed a man and couldn't
live with it."
"He didn't actually kill him in the strictest sense," Buffy said placing a
cup of coffee in front of Connor.
"I know that," he replied. "I just..." he shook his head again, "I'm just
having a hard time digesting all this. I talked to your lieutenant this
morning and he told me a lot of things. He said that Riley was blackmailing
a woman. He even," his face contorted in disgust, "forced her to have...
God, I can't say it. It's too disgusting."
"Don't," Buffy put a hand over Connor's. "Don't torture yourself by seeing
only the bad things he did. I did that too and it's not good. Try to think
about the times when he made a joke, when you laughed together."
"How can you be so... so forgiving?" Conner asked, in utter shock.
"I'm not. Riley did many terrible things. Some of them to me. But he's dead.
And it's of no use to dwell on it. And about the blackmailing. Yes, it was
wrong, but at least he did it for Eunice. He tried to help her."
"She's right," Angel said, giving Riley's brother a warm smile. "I had a lot
of good times with him and I'd prefer to remember them."
"He called me," Connor said suddenly, "About a week ago he called me in my
office. I hadn't heard from him in over a year. I tried to call him, but he
never answered his phone, never returned my calls. And suddenly he did. He
was stone drunk. I think he didn't even remember afterwards that he called
me at all." Frowning he ran a finger over the handle of his cup. Not looking
up he said, "He told me, he tried to rape you. And he cried."
"Connor-" Buffy tried to say, but he held up a hand.
"No, don't. I don't want to hear any excuses. And from the way you're
looking at me, I know it's true. What I want to know is, why he became what
he was in the end? He was my brother, Buffy. I knew him better than anyone
else, maybe even better than Angel, and all of a sudden I feel as if I
didn't know him at all. And I find myself asking, how was this possible."
"We tried to find an answer just before you came," Angel said and shrugged,
"We haven't found one."
Connor laughed shortly, "Really comforting. I..." again he shook his head,
"He loved you," he said, looking at Buffy. "The only thing I am absolutely
certain of is that he loved you. I've never seen him happier than on the day
you became his wife. The fact that he let you slip away from him shows me
that he was really messed up."
He suddenly shook his upper body as if to get rid of all the grief and pain
and straightened on the chair, then reached in his pocket and produced a
sealed envelope. "This is for you both," he said handing it to Buffy and
Angel. "It was in a box he sent to me the day before he died. I have no idea
what's in it." All of a sudden he stood and the others did as well. "And
anyways. I need to go. I promised my kids to read them a story tonight. And
if I've learned anything from all this, then it's to never take another
person for granted. Tomorrow it could be too late already."
"Thanks for coming, Connor," Buffy said and hugged him. "You have a lovely
wife and beautiful children. You're a lucky man."
"Yeah," he nodded, "I suppose I am. Angel," he turned towards his brother's
long-time friend. "I know he envied you. But he loved you too. Don't believe
that he wasn't your friend. Because he was."
"I know that, Connor. And I want to remember that."
The two men embraced for a short moment, then exchanged a long look that
spoke more than any words. With a last nod, he opened and door and slipped
from the apartment.
Buffy and Angel stood there for a moment, just looking at each other, then
without a word they went back to the living-room and she took the envelope
and ripped it open. The moment the contents were on the table, Angel looked
at the blond, who stared at him through wide eyes. "Are you thinking the
same as I?" she asked.
"Yes," Angel confirmed. "I should call Cordelia immediately," he pulled his
cell phone from his pocket. "And while I'm at it," he said, "You should call
Xander and Spike."
She nodded, the phone already in her hand, "And after that I'm calling the
pizza delivery service." She smiled when she saw him raising a brow, "We'll
get hungry soon. And as I see it there's a lot we have to talk about."
He smiled back, and then waited for Cordelia to answer her phone.
*****
Tuesday, September 5th, 10.00 a.m., Los Angeles
"And what does Cordelia Chase think about these?" Giles asked and put the
pictures he'd been holding on his desk. The expression on his face was a
mixture of disbelief, worry and anger. If the situation hadn't been that
serious it would've been almost funny to seem them all playing out on his face..
"Probably the same you do," Angel replied rubbing his eyes and exchanging a
look with Spike who was sitting by his side. It had been a long night with
Xander, Doyle and Cordelia in Buffy's apartment, sorting through the
contents of the envelope and discovering things none of them had thought
possible. "I'd say the evidence is pretty obvious."
Giles sighed, raked a hand through his hair. When he caught the eyes of the
two detectives looking at him expectantly, he nodded, "Yes, yes, I agree,"
he said. "There's not much to say. These pictures tell their own story.
Still, I have trouble believing my own eyes."
"It's never easy to see evidence against a colleague," Spike remarked.
"I've worked with this person for a long time. I've trusted-" Giles stopped
himself, shaking his head again in disbelief. When Spike and Angel had
entered his office this morning he'd already known that it wouldn't be
something pleasant they had to tell him. The expression on their faces had
been grim, their movements agitated, but there had also been an underlying
weariness. And Giles had instantly known what it meant. They'd identified
the dirty cop. And they hadn't liked it one bit.
Angel couldn't sit any longer so he stood up from his chair and walked
towards the window, staring into the outer office. Buffy looked up the very
same moment and their eyes met. A long look passed between them. A look that
spoke of love, friendship, understanding and the sharing of the same
undeniable truth. Not taking his eyes from the blonde's face, he asked,
"What are we going to do now? I mean, yeah we do have the pictures and they
tell us who the person is, but that's still not enough. We need more to make
this case waterproof. Cordelia says she needs more to be absolutely certain,
to convince a jury hundred percent."
"Damn," Giles swore under his breath but the others heard it nevertheless.
"I hate this. But I agree it's not enough for a jury. A smart lawyer could
turn it upside down. Well, you have to continue following the person, I
guess."
"There's just a problem, Sir," Spike said slowly, for the first time using
the word "sir".
Under normal circumstances Giles would've been tempted to grin, but as it
was, his expression stayed grim and unmoving. "Yes?"
"With the Finn-incident a week ago, I think it's a safe bet that it's out
there that we're working for Internal Affairs."
The lieutenant swore again, and then exhaled sharply, "Yeah," he said
finally, "you're probably right." He slapped a flat hand on his desk, "God,
dammit, that's a bloody mess." Raking his hand through his hair, he exhaled
again, "Okay, let's deal with what we have. There are these," he pointed at
the pictures scattered over his desk, "and we have the letter from Finn,
where he tells us all he knows. Even that he was blackmailed, because his
sister was his weak spot, and although he tried to be careful, he obviously
wasn't careful enough. But he's dead now and not able to certify his written
statement by testifying in person."
Not able to sit any longer, Giles stood as well and jammed his hands in his
pockets, "So although we do have his written word, we can't use it. To top
this our suspect probably knows that you're on his trail. What a mess. What
a bloody mess."
"Buffy and Xander are going to tail him," Angel spoke after a moment of
silence, then with a last glance at the blond in the outer office her turned
towards Giles. "Our suspect doesn't know they're involved as well. They
arrived later when Riley was shot, there's no way they'd connect them with
the IA-investigation. It's pretty unlikely to use detectives from the
department to spy on their colleagues. So I think, nobody will suspect
them."
Slowly Giles nodded, "Alright. Buffy and Harris are going to take care of
our suspect. But I want you to stay in contact with them."
"That goes without saying," Angel replied, hating the situation more by the
second. Of course Buffy and Xander were trained and experienced cops. Of
course they knew how to act in such a situation. But his gut turned into one
gigantic knot at the thought of the woman he loved being exposed to danger.
Not that she wasn't exposed to it every day, she was a cop after all. But
this was different. They were going against a powerful enemy, and besides,
this was his job. He was supposed to take care of the dirty cop, not Buffy. He
was supposed to face the danger, not a woman who just went through an
emotional roller coaster.
"We'll be connected to their car all times," Spike stood now as well. "We're
their backup."
"Alright," Giles nodded, "let's do it."
Spike nodded back and slipped from the office. Angel was about to follow him
when Giles' voice held him back. "Yes?" he asked.
"I heard you stayed with Buffy this past week," the lieutenant began.
Angel frowned slightly at that, "Yeah, and?"
"I suppose I don't have to tell you how vulnerable she is at the moment. The
news about Riley and Mike, Riley's death... Be careful with her. Don't hurt
her."
The dark-haired man's features softened into a slight smile, "I don't intent
to," he said. "I love her." A looked passed between the two men, before Angel
left the office as well.
*
"You think," Kate said, tipping her index finger speculatively against her
chin while she stared over the desk at Buffy, who was sitting at the other
end of the outer office, eyes fixed on Angel behind the window of Giles'
room, "that there's something going on again between Buffy and Angel?"
"What?" Darla's head came up with a jerk. She stared at Kate for a moment,
then turned and eyes narrowing let her gaze wander from the blond woman to
the dark-haired man, who had been her lover what seemed like ages ago. Years
of training made it possible that she could turn back and give her partner
an indifferent shrug, "Who knows," she said, casting her eyes back on the
report she was reading.
Kate tilted her head and let her inquiring eyes rest on the bent head of her
blond partner. Darla gave the picture of indifference but they had been
partners too long, for Kate to be fooled that easily. Besides, Kate wasn't a cop
for nothing. "Don't even try to tell me that you're not interested," she said,
waiting for her partner's reaction. When Darla's head came up again, she
continued, "And don't try to tell me that you're over him. You were never,
not for one moment, over Angel Reardon. He's in your blood, honey. He's been
ever since you laid eyes on him."
"That's none of your damned business," Darla snarled, her voice barely above
a whisper. Kate Lockley might be her partner, and she was a damned good one,
but the two women had never been friends, and Kate certainly wasn't someone
Darla would confess to.
Kate laughed slightly, knowing that she'd hit right on the money. "Whatever
you say, Darla. Whatever you say," she grinned now, tipping her finger at
her chin. Buffy was reading a file now and Angel was talking to Giles
again, "But I would bet a year's salary that something's going on there."
*****
same day, 2.00 p.m.
"Listen to me," the voice growled at the other end of the line. "They know.
They know everything. I need to get away from here."
Floyd Brady, David Griffin's right hand, and if you believed rumors on the
street, one of the most vicious people on this planet rolled his eyes,
"Don't panic," he said, clearly annoyed. He hated weakness and fear and it
was panic that came through the line. "They don't know a thing. If they did
they'd arrested you by now. But you're still running around free."
"Is that meant to make me feel better?" the voice hissed now. "Because it
doesn't."
"Stay put," Floyd replied and waved one of his hands in, signaling him to
sit down. He took the sheets the other man handed him and only
half-listening to what the detective was saying on the phone, scanned their
content. At the end he nodded to the man opposite to him with a question in
his eyes.
"It just came in," the man, who called himself Lyle, reported. "It's hot
news."
"Agreed," Floyd, said, shifting his attention back to the phone. "Listen,"
he hissed, "Listen to me. Stay put. Don't do anything stupid. We'll take
care of the rest. Behave normal. And don't call again. If you need to know
anything, I'm going to contact you."
"But-"
"No buts, do you hear me? We're doing this my way now." Without waiting for
a reply, he shut off the phone. "Idiot," he muttered, then sighed and
scanned the papers in his hand again. Looking up he gazed at Lyle, "That's
really interesting. So Finn has kept records, huh? Damn," he slapped his
hand on the desk, which made Lyle jump in his chair. "Why didn't anyone
check this before Zack took care of him?"
"W-well," Lyle stuttered, knowing how easily his boss' temper could blow up.
"W-we didn't know about the brother."
"Obviously," Floyd replied bitingly. "Well, the damage is done. There's
nothing we can do now. But, as I said before, if the proof was good enough,
they would've already arrested our contact. But they haven't. And that tells
us two things. The proof isn't enough *and* they're going to try to find
more. They're going to try to make this waterproof." He smiled, a very slow
smile, Lyle had seen before, and it send shivers down his back, "Get me Zack
on the phone, I think I need him for another job."
*****
same day, 8.00 p.m., Los Angeles
Putting the fork down, Buffy sighed in contentment and gazed at Angel over
her kitchen table with a smile, "That was delicious. Absolutely perfect. But
you can't go on doing this."
He smiled back at her, "All I did was call the restaurant and they
delivered," he replied, "Oh, yeah, and I set the table. Really hard work,"
he ended with a grin."
"It's very sweet. But it's not what I meant, and you know that, Angel,"
Buffy said, leaning her elbows on the table and resting her chin in the palm
of one hand. "What I meant is, you can't keep spoiling me like this. Angel,
you've more or less lived here ever since... Anyway. This has to stop, I'm a
grown up person, and I can't go on using your friendship. I need to take my
life in my own hands again."
His smile faded and he put down his own fork with great care, "Is that how
you feel?" he asked slowly. "That we're friends?"
Buffy frowned for a moment, then a bit irritated, she replied, "Well, yeah."
A tight fist seemed to squeeze his heart and Angel felt as if he'd been
punched in the gut, but managed to sound cool, "I see," he said,
concentrating on breathing slowly, not to lose control. He didn't know why
her answer surprised him so much. Sure, they had kissed once, outside the
Splash, and yeah, she'd reacted, passionately even, but of course that
didn't have to mean anything. What had been one of the most intense moments
for him might have just been a spark of passion for her. He had been so
sure, she had felt it too, but then, he barely knew her anymore. Four years
had passed and although they had spent the last week more or less together,
nothing in her behavior had hinted more than friendship.
She must have sensed the change in his mood because suddenly uncertain, she
reached over the table and covered his large hand with her small one, "Or
did I get that wrong?" she asked anxiously, "I really want you to be my
friend and I want to be yours. That's important for me."
Slowly he raised his head and his eyes met her pleading ones. And if it
might kill him, how could he say no to those eyes, "No, you didn't get that
wrong. Of course I'm your friend." She let go of his hand and obviously
relieved sank back into her chair.
"Good," she smiled. "Still, I think it's time for me to get my life back in
order. And to start I need to sleep on my own again. It was wonderful of you
to stay here. It made me feel safe and all, but you have your own
apartment."
Okay, if she wanted it that way, friendship it was. He closed his eyes for a
moment, then took a deep breath and said with forced cheerfulness, "That's
true, although I'm not so sure that Spike and Dru will be so pleased about
my return."
Her eyes widened for a moment, before she said, "So this is serious, huh?
Who would've thought? They are so... different, I guess. Spike is tough and
forward while Dru's so shy."
"Spike only seems forward. He's actually quite vulnerable, just covers it up
very well," Angel told her, carefully holding on to his control.
"Really?" she asked, and then shrugged, "Well, he certainly does it well. I
would've never guessed it. But Dru was hot for him the moment she saw him."
She rolled her eyes and laughed, "'He's so cute', she said."
They laughed for a moment, and then silence settled over the kitchen.
Clearing his throat, Angel pushed his chair back and stood. "I'm just
putting the dirty stuff away, then I'll be gone."
"Oh no," she stood as well. "I can't let you do that. You ordered the food,
and set the table. The least I can do is clean up afterwards. Besides, I
don't want to keep you, if you have better things to do," she said quickly,
averting her eyes and reaching for the dirty plates.
The moment Angel saw her taking them with trembling fingers he understood.
God, he really was an idiot. Why hadn't he seen it before? "Buffy," he said
and when she didn't look at him, just continued collecting plates and
silverware, he repeated, "Buffy. Look at me."
Slowly her head came up and he could see tears in her eyes. Reaching out he
took the forks from her hands, "You don't want me to go, do you?" he asked,
his eyes never letting go of hers.
"Wha-" her voice cracked and she had to clear her throat, "I don't?"
Slowly he shook his head and took her hand in his, pulling it to his mouth,
while his eyes were still holding hers captured. With great care he planted
a kiss on each of her fingers, then turned her hand and planted another on
her palm.
He felt the shiver running through her arm and her body, heard her breath
catch in her throat, "I already told you that the past is the past," he said
quietly, "This is the future, Buffy. What are you afraid of? Is it really
just friendship you want?"
"I-" her voice cracked a second time, and annoyed with herself she shook her
head, then let out a little self-conscious laugh, "I hurt you very much
and... And I know you said you don't blame me... and... And I know you
kissed me, but that doesn't have to mean anything... and-"
Her rambling ended in a gasp when he pulled her to him, "You're thinking too
much," he growled and her eyes widened in surprise, "Why don't you try
feeling for a change?" he asked, and covered her lips with his.
The instant his lips met hers, passion slammed through him like an
unstoppable runaway train. Touching her face, deepening the kiss, wasn't
enough, he realized with a mixture of joy and despair. God it would never be
enough. He wanted her, all of her, wanted to devour her, wanted to strip her
naked and kiss every part of her body, and then he-
Panting he pulled back, tempted to smile when he saw her closed lids, her
parted lips, slightly swollen from his kiss, "Do you still want me to go?"
he whispered against her mouth.
Her eyes opened slowly, and she looked at him from them, glazed over with
passion that made his groin tighten, "No," she whispered back. "I don't want
you to go." And with this she pulled his head back down.
Her lips parted, and her tongue flicked out, tracing his mouth, probing for
entry. He groaned, and thrust one hand into her hair, pulling her even
closer, her hot mouth tightly locked with his, he clamped his other arm
around her hips, dragging her soft body against his groin.
His mind and body had been waiting for this so long it was like touching
fire. He had the feeling that he wasn't able to move anymore, wasn't able to
breathe. All he could do was feel and taste. Her silken lips against his,
her breasts pressed to his chest, her hips undulating against his growing
erection.
There was a split second when he might have been able to pull back, but then
she moaned in his mouth, her arms tightening around his neck, and Angel was
lost. His heart was in frenzy, his body was screaming for fulfillment, while
light seemed to explode behind his eyes. This was Buffy, this was what
he had dreamed of in the nights of four long, lonely years and now she was
here, in his arms, and wanting him the same way he wanted her.
He made a low sound in his throat and lifted her in his arms. Without
breaking the kiss he walked towards the living room, stripping him and her
in the process. When they finally reached her couch, they were standing in
front of each other in their underwear.
She opened her eyes for the second time tonight, when he broke the kiss for
a moment, and looked around a little bit disoriented. "Buffy?" he forced
himself to ask. She nodded, and that was all the invitation he needed.
Their lips met again, and Angel instantly deepened the kiss with a deep,
slow slide of his tongue, tasting her tenderly, thoroughly this time. Then
his mouth left hers and began to explore, nipping at her neck, at her
earlobe, his lips whispered over her face, her chin, down to her throat,
along the line of her bra and he felt her arch her back to him.
"You're beautiful," he murmured, "so very beautiful."
She moaned again, pulling him closer, her hands traveling lower, tugging at
his boxers, and he helped her get rid of them. With another move he'd
removed her slip and her bra and then it was skin to skin, with no more
barriers, no more layers between them. They were laying on the living room
carpet, the moon shining through the window, bathing the two bare bodies
into a silver light.
Angel continued kissing her body, his mouth traveling lower, his tongue
darting in her belly-button, circling it, the action making her moan again.
"Angel," she hissed, almost mad with passion.
"Easy, baby, easy," he murmured again, breathing kisses against her inner
thighs, then traveling up again, until he found her already dripping center.
He heard her drawing a sharp breath when his tongue stroked slowly over her
clit, and she buried her hands in his hair, her hips arching against his
mouth.
"Oh God," he heard her moan. "Oh God, Angel. No, I want..."
"What?" he looked up, "What do you want, sweet?"
"I want you," she croaked.
"You've got me," he said with a smile in his voice, lowering his head again.
But her hands held him back. "No," she shook her head wildly, her eyes
opening, she looked at him frantically, "I want you inside of me," she said,
already spinning out of control, "I want to come with you inside of me."
Her words made his restraint snap. He moved upward, grasped her waist and
roller her on top of him.
Her eyes flew open, "Angel, what-"
Without words he curled upward to take her nipple into his mouth. She cried
out at the pleasure. Angel made a rough sound in his throat and took her
nipple between his teeth, rubbing them across, while he shifted her in his
lap, his arousal teasing her dripping entrance. "Oh... God," she gasped,
wiggling to get him inside of her.
He shifted her for a second time, pulling her legs on either side of his
hips, clamped his hands on her waist, lifted her for a moment only to
bring her down on his aching, rock hard erection. Buffy hissed again,
feeling him fill her, feeling every inch of him entering her. Her eyes
opened and widened, her breath caught. He smiled into her eyes and then
brought her down the rest of the way.
The world exploded in a shower of stars and Buffy screamed, clutching his
shoulders, holding him, and craving him.
With a fluid motion he rolled them around, so that he was on top, still
deeply imbedded in her and then he started to move. "Open your eyes," he
ordered, and she did, "I want you to look at me," he told her, his voice
almost a growl.
Buffy had the feeling she would either dissolve or die. It
was too much. It was too good, too...
Suddenly his big body tensed above hers, he began to shudder, a low moan
coming from his mouth and with a final trust he cried out her name, "BUFFY!"
That was enough for her, the expression on his face, and the expression of
love in his eyes, the way he cried out her name - it drove her over the
edge. With a sob she followed him into oblivion.
*
It was some time later until Buffy found enough energy to open her eyes
again. They were still intimately entwined, Angel still lying partly on top
of her on the living room floor.
Feeling her move under him, he opened his eyes as well, "I'm sorry," he
said, his voice sleepy, "I didn't mean to crush you."
"No," she tightened her arms, to hold him in place, not willing to let him
go. "I like feeling your weight," she protested, but he nevertheless rolled
them around so that she was now lying on top of him.
"I'm too heavy," he said with a smile, one hand coming up, tracing the line
of her brow. "Especially with the carpet underneath us."
"That's what I was wondering," she replied resting her chin on his chest.
"Why didn't you take the bed?"
"I'm not really interested in making love to you in a bed where you and..."
he just trailed off, but Buffy had no problems understanding him.
"Riley and I never made love there."
"Oh, sure, you were married for four years-"
"Three and a half, we were only living together for three and a half," she
insisted.
"Okay, so three and a half," he replied, annoyance rising in him. Did one
time more or less matter? "But you can't tell me you never slept with him."
"I didn't say that. Of course I slept with him," she told him and when he
raised a brow, she slapped his shoulder, "Don't look at me like that. I said
we never made love. How could we?" her voice changed all of a sudden, "You
can only make love when it means something to you, and I can only make love
when I'm in love, so as far as I'm concerned I made love only with one man
in my life."
His throat was suddenly dry as emotions were threading to choke him. With a
muffled sound, he pulled her close and held her. He was a bit rough, but
they both didn't care, "God, I love you," he said hoarsely, kissing the top
of her head, his hands warm on her back.
"You... love me?" her eyes were suddenly moist and she was staring at him
with disbelief.
"Of course I love you," he replied. "I never stopped loving you."
"Oh, Angel," now she couldn't stop the tears anymore. "I love you too. I
love you so much. I never stopped either."
"There were days," he admitted, his voice hoarse, "when I thought I'd die. I
missed you so much. I-" he shook his head, blinking tears away, the emotions
too deep to put into words.
"It was the same for me," she assured him, pressing her mouth to his chest,
inhaling his scent, loving the smooth feeling of his skin under her lips.
"And I thought you'd never forgive me for what I'd done," she admitted
brokenly. "I love you," she cried, her mouth, wet with her tears and soon
with his met his again. "Please love me, Angel. Love me."
"Always," he replied and they lost themselves in each other again.
... to be continued
By Jill
Monday, September 4th, 6.00 p.m. Los Angeles
It was quiet in Buffy's apartment, now that she and Angel were sitting on
her sofa in the living room, her head resting on his shoulder, her eyes
closed. The week had gone by in a blur.
The FBI had taken Eunice Montez into protective custody and they would
provide her with a new identity as soon as possible. In return Eunice would
give all information she had, and regarding the fact that she'd been living
more than 20 years with one of the most wanted drug dealers in South
America, it was quite a lot. Actually the FBI could hardly believe their
luck and were only too willing to help Eunice in any way possible.
The coroner had confirmed their suspicion that Riley had been shot with a
wide-range weapon and so they had no idea who the killer could be. The whole
department was investigating his murder but so far they had only pulled
blanks. The news that Riley had shot Mike had spread rapidly and to spare
Buffy the whisper behind her back and the curious looks, Giles had given her
several days off.
Buffy was grateful for it. There was a lot to do regarding Riley's funeral,
because although they'd been in the process of a divorce and were not living
with each other anymore, legally she was still his wife and responsible for
all the things that had to be done. Angel was by her side the whole time,
helping her whenever she needed him, taking care of formalities, or just
cooking dinner for her.
Riley's funeral had been a quiet affair. His brother, Connor, came with his
family and with the help of the FBI they even arranged for Connor to meet
his sister Eunice for a while. A lot of cops attended Riley's funeral. The
fact that he was responsible for the death of Buffy's brother didn't present
a problem. Nobody doubted the words of a dying man that it had been an
accident and so the file of Mike Danicki was officially closed.
"It's the first time in a week that I have the feeling that I'm able to
breathe." Buffy looked up and her eyes met Angel's, "The whole week was
so... unreal," she shook her head, "I don't know. I still can't believe he's
dead. Just like that," she snapped her fingers.
"I know," he replied quietly, reaching out and taking her hand. "There's so
much I can't quite grasp. He killed Mike. It's so... strange. I didn't
suspect him. Not for a second. When Mike went down that night, I was sure it
had been one of the bank robbers. Then when the report came, telling us it
was my weapon..." he trailed off and shook his head. He had still trouble
understanding what had happened. All the things Riley had said to him before
he had died. About his permanent jealousy. When had it started, Angel
wondered. When had friendship changed into something ugly?
"Maybe I should feel sorry for him," Buffy mused, frowning slightly, "Maybe
I should, but I can't. He did so many terrible things. And I am not talking
about Mike. I can believe that was an accident. And I can even believe he
suppressed what he knew, that happens, I've seen it more than once. But
later. When he found out about Mike. He lied to me, Angel. He didn't even
try to tell me."
He was quiet for a long time, and then suddenly said, "I wonder-" but broke
off again.
"You wonder, what?" she probed.
"You remember the day when he gave you Mike's file," it wasn't really a
question. Angel didn't doubt for a moment that Buffy remembered the day.
"Yeah, sure. Why?"
"I wonder if he wanted you to read it. Maybe he... maybe he wanted you to
know," he shook his head and released a long breath and ran a hand through
his hair, then over his face. "God, Riley was so screwed up. Maybe I'm just
trying to find the good in him. I don't know. Maybe a part of me just
refuses to see him for what he was."
"But that's just the point," she replied, reaching for the coffee cup on the
table, "Who was he? I think I've asked myself that question a million times
this week. And you know what? I still don't have the right answer. Maybe
we'll never know."
Angel was about to say something when the doorbell rang. He wanted to get
up, but Buffy shook her head and went herself. She smiled when she saw her
visitor, "Connor, come in," she invited. "It's good to see you. We barely
had a minute to talk."
"That's the reason I came. Lenore, the kids and I, we're going to fly back
to Washington tomorrow morning. And... well, I thought we should talk." He
followed her to the living room and when he spotted Angel, he smiled as
well, "Angel, so good to see you," he said and the two men hugged. "Although
I wish..."
"I know," Angel replied with a nod. "I wish the same. Never in a million
years I would've pictured our meeting like this."
"No," Connor agreed. "And there's something I need to say first. Angel, I
had no idea what was going on when Riley married Buffy. I'm sorry I nearly
threw you out of the church that afternoon."
Angel chuckled slightly when Buffy gasped, "You did, what?"
Connor had to smile, "I... well, I saw him coming from your room that
afternoon and... we had a fight. Not with fists, but I shouted at him and -"
"Connor," Angel interrupted him, "Forget it, will you. It's so long ago. It
seems unreal today."
"Yes it does, doesn't it," Riley's brother said with a slight shake of his
head. "He changed so much the last two years. I had no idea what happened,"
he laughed harshly, "Well, now we all know. He killed a man and couldn't
live with it."
"He didn't actually kill him in the strictest sense," Buffy said placing a
cup of coffee in front of Connor.
"I know that," he replied. "I just..." he shook his head again, "I'm just
having a hard time digesting all this. I talked to your lieutenant this
morning and he told me a lot of things. He said that Riley was blackmailing
a woman. He even," his face contorted in disgust, "forced her to have...
God, I can't say it. It's too disgusting."
"Don't," Buffy put a hand over Connor's. "Don't torture yourself by seeing
only the bad things he did. I did that too and it's not good. Try to think
about the times when he made a joke, when you laughed together."
"How can you be so... so forgiving?" Conner asked, in utter shock.
"I'm not. Riley did many terrible things. Some of them to me. But he's dead.
And it's of no use to dwell on it. And about the blackmailing. Yes, it was
wrong, but at least he did it for Eunice. He tried to help her."
"She's right," Angel said, giving Riley's brother a warm smile. "I had a lot
of good times with him and I'd prefer to remember them."
"He called me," Connor said suddenly, "About a week ago he called me in my
office. I hadn't heard from him in over a year. I tried to call him, but he
never answered his phone, never returned my calls. And suddenly he did. He
was stone drunk. I think he didn't even remember afterwards that he called
me at all." Frowning he ran a finger over the handle of his cup. Not looking
up he said, "He told me, he tried to rape you. And he cried."
"Connor-" Buffy tried to say, but he held up a hand.
"No, don't. I don't want to hear any excuses. And from the way you're
looking at me, I know it's true. What I want to know is, why he became what
he was in the end? He was my brother, Buffy. I knew him better than anyone
else, maybe even better than Angel, and all of a sudden I feel as if I
didn't know him at all. And I find myself asking, how was this possible."
"We tried to find an answer just before you came," Angel said and shrugged,
"We haven't found one."
Connor laughed shortly, "Really comforting. I..." again he shook his head,
"He loved you," he said, looking at Buffy. "The only thing I am absolutely
certain of is that he loved you. I've never seen him happier than on the day
you became his wife. The fact that he let you slip away from him shows me
that he was really messed up."
He suddenly shook his upper body as if to get rid of all the grief and pain
and straightened on the chair, then reached in his pocket and produced a
sealed envelope. "This is for you both," he said handing it to Buffy and
Angel. "It was in a box he sent to me the day before he died. I have no idea
what's in it." All of a sudden he stood and the others did as well. "And
anyways. I need to go. I promised my kids to read them a story tonight. And
if I've learned anything from all this, then it's to never take another
person for granted. Tomorrow it could be too late already."
"Thanks for coming, Connor," Buffy said and hugged him. "You have a lovely
wife and beautiful children. You're a lucky man."
"Yeah," he nodded, "I suppose I am. Angel," he turned towards his brother's
long-time friend. "I know he envied you. But he loved you too. Don't believe
that he wasn't your friend. Because he was."
"I know that, Connor. And I want to remember that."
The two men embraced for a short moment, then exchanged a long look that
spoke more than any words. With a last nod, he opened and door and slipped
from the apartment.
Buffy and Angel stood there for a moment, just looking at each other, then
without a word they went back to the living-room and she took the envelope
and ripped it open. The moment the contents were on the table, Angel looked
at the blond, who stared at him through wide eyes. "Are you thinking the
same as I?" she asked.
"Yes," Angel confirmed. "I should call Cordelia immediately," he pulled his
cell phone from his pocket. "And while I'm at it," he said, "You should call
Xander and Spike."
She nodded, the phone already in her hand, "And after that I'm calling the
pizza delivery service." She smiled when she saw him raising a brow, "We'll
get hungry soon. And as I see it there's a lot we have to talk about."
He smiled back, and then waited for Cordelia to answer her phone.
*****
Tuesday, September 5th, 10.00 a.m., Los Angeles
"And what does Cordelia Chase think about these?" Giles asked and put the
pictures he'd been holding on his desk. The expression on his face was a
mixture of disbelief, worry and anger. If the situation hadn't been that
serious it would've been almost funny to seem them all playing out on his face..
"Probably the same you do," Angel replied rubbing his eyes and exchanging a
look with Spike who was sitting by his side. It had been a long night with
Xander, Doyle and Cordelia in Buffy's apartment, sorting through the
contents of the envelope and discovering things none of them had thought
possible. "I'd say the evidence is pretty obvious."
Giles sighed, raked a hand through his hair. When he caught the eyes of the
two detectives looking at him expectantly, he nodded, "Yes, yes, I agree,"
he said. "There's not much to say. These pictures tell their own story.
Still, I have trouble believing my own eyes."
"It's never easy to see evidence against a colleague," Spike remarked.
"I've worked with this person for a long time. I've trusted-" Giles stopped
himself, shaking his head again in disbelief. When Spike and Angel had
entered his office this morning he'd already known that it wouldn't be
something pleasant they had to tell him. The expression on their faces had
been grim, their movements agitated, but there had also been an underlying
weariness. And Giles had instantly known what it meant. They'd identified
the dirty cop. And they hadn't liked it one bit.
Angel couldn't sit any longer so he stood up from his chair and walked
towards the window, staring into the outer office. Buffy looked up the very
same moment and their eyes met. A long look passed between them. A look that
spoke of love, friendship, understanding and the sharing of the same
undeniable truth. Not taking his eyes from the blonde's face, he asked,
"What are we going to do now? I mean, yeah we do have the pictures and they
tell us who the person is, but that's still not enough. We need more to make
this case waterproof. Cordelia says she needs more to be absolutely certain,
to convince a jury hundred percent."
"Damn," Giles swore under his breath but the others heard it nevertheless.
"I hate this. But I agree it's not enough for a jury. A smart lawyer could
turn it upside down. Well, you have to continue following the person, I
guess."
"There's just a problem, Sir," Spike said slowly, for the first time using
the word "sir".
Under normal circumstances Giles would've been tempted to grin, but as it
was, his expression stayed grim and unmoving. "Yes?"
"With the Finn-incident a week ago, I think it's a safe bet that it's out
there that we're working for Internal Affairs."
The lieutenant swore again, and then exhaled sharply, "Yeah," he said
finally, "you're probably right." He slapped a flat hand on his desk, "God,
dammit, that's a bloody mess." Raking his hand through his hair, he exhaled
again, "Okay, let's deal with what we have. There are these," he pointed at
the pictures scattered over his desk, "and we have the letter from Finn,
where he tells us all he knows. Even that he was blackmailed, because his
sister was his weak spot, and although he tried to be careful, he obviously
wasn't careful enough. But he's dead now and not able to certify his written
statement by testifying in person."
Not able to sit any longer, Giles stood as well and jammed his hands in his
pockets, "So although we do have his written word, we can't use it. To top
this our suspect probably knows that you're on his trail. What a mess. What
a bloody mess."
"Buffy and Xander are going to tail him," Angel spoke after a moment of
silence, then with a last glance at the blond in the outer office her turned
towards Giles. "Our suspect doesn't know they're involved as well. They
arrived later when Riley was shot, there's no way they'd connect them with
the IA-investigation. It's pretty unlikely to use detectives from the
department to spy on their colleagues. So I think, nobody will suspect
them."
Slowly Giles nodded, "Alright. Buffy and Harris are going to take care of
our suspect. But I want you to stay in contact with them."
"That goes without saying," Angel replied, hating the situation more by the
second. Of course Buffy and Xander were trained and experienced cops. Of
course they knew how to act in such a situation. But his gut turned into one
gigantic knot at the thought of the woman he loved being exposed to danger.
Not that she wasn't exposed to it every day, she was a cop after all. But
this was different. They were going against a powerful enemy, and besides,
this was his job. He was supposed to take care of the dirty cop, not Buffy. He
was supposed to face the danger, not a woman who just went through an
emotional roller coaster.
"We'll be connected to their car all times," Spike stood now as well. "We're
their backup."
"Alright," Giles nodded, "let's do it."
Spike nodded back and slipped from the office. Angel was about to follow him
when Giles' voice held him back. "Yes?" he asked.
"I heard you stayed with Buffy this past week," the lieutenant began.
Angel frowned slightly at that, "Yeah, and?"
"I suppose I don't have to tell you how vulnerable she is at the moment. The
news about Riley and Mike, Riley's death... Be careful with her. Don't hurt
her."
The dark-haired man's features softened into a slight smile, "I don't intent
to," he said. "I love her." A looked passed between the two men, before Angel
left the office as well.
*
"You think," Kate said, tipping her index finger speculatively against her
chin while she stared over the desk at Buffy, who was sitting at the other
end of the outer office, eyes fixed on Angel behind the window of Giles'
room, "that there's something going on again between Buffy and Angel?"
"What?" Darla's head came up with a jerk. She stared at Kate for a moment,
then turned and eyes narrowing let her gaze wander from the blond woman to
the dark-haired man, who had been her lover what seemed like ages ago. Years
of training made it possible that she could turn back and give her partner
an indifferent shrug, "Who knows," she said, casting her eyes back on the
report she was reading.
Kate tilted her head and let her inquiring eyes rest on the bent head of her
blond partner. Darla gave the picture of indifference but they had been
partners too long, for Kate to be fooled that easily. Besides, Kate wasn't a cop
for nothing. "Don't even try to tell me that you're not interested," she said,
waiting for her partner's reaction. When Darla's head came up again, she
continued, "And don't try to tell me that you're over him. You were never,
not for one moment, over Angel Reardon. He's in your blood, honey. He's been
ever since you laid eyes on him."
"That's none of your damned business," Darla snarled, her voice barely above
a whisper. Kate Lockley might be her partner, and she was a damned good one,
but the two women had never been friends, and Kate certainly wasn't someone
Darla would confess to.
Kate laughed slightly, knowing that she'd hit right on the money. "Whatever
you say, Darla. Whatever you say," she grinned now, tipping her finger at
her chin. Buffy was reading a file now and Angel was talking to Giles
again, "But I would bet a year's salary that something's going on there."
*****
same day, 2.00 p.m.
"Listen to me," the voice growled at the other end of the line. "They know.
They know everything. I need to get away from here."
Floyd Brady, David Griffin's right hand, and if you believed rumors on the
street, one of the most vicious people on this planet rolled his eyes,
"Don't panic," he said, clearly annoyed. He hated weakness and fear and it
was panic that came through the line. "They don't know a thing. If they did
they'd arrested you by now. But you're still running around free."
"Is that meant to make me feel better?" the voice hissed now. "Because it
doesn't."
"Stay put," Floyd replied and waved one of his hands in, signaling him to
sit down. He took the sheets the other man handed him and only
half-listening to what the detective was saying on the phone, scanned their
content. At the end he nodded to the man opposite to him with a question in
his eyes.
"It just came in," the man, who called himself Lyle, reported. "It's hot
news."
"Agreed," Floyd, said, shifting his attention back to the phone. "Listen,"
he hissed, "Listen to me. Stay put. Don't do anything stupid. We'll take
care of the rest. Behave normal. And don't call again. If you need to know
anything, I'm going to contact you."
"But-"
"No buts, do you hear me? We're doing this my way now." Without waiting for
a reply, he shut off the phone. "Idiot," he muttered, then sighed and
scanned the papers in his hand again. Looking up he gazed at Lyle, "That's
really interesting. So Finn has kept records, huh? Damn," he slapped his
hand on the desk, which made Lyle jump in his chair. "Why didn't anyone
check this before Zack took care of him?"
"W-well," Lyle stuttered, knowing how easily his boss' temper could blow up.
"W-we didn't know about the brother."
"Obviously," Floyd replied bitingly. "Well, the damage is done. There's
nothing we can do now. But, as I said before, if the proof was good enough,
they would've already arrested our contact. But they haven't. And that tells
us two things. The proof isn't enough *and* they're going to try to find
more. They're going to try to make this waterproof." He smiled, a very slow
smile, Lyle had seen before, and it send shivers down his back, "Get me Zack
on the phone, I think I need him for another job."
*****
same day, 8.00 p.m., Los Angeles
Putting the fork down, Buffy sighed in contentment and gazed at Angel over
her kitchen table with a smile, "That was delicious. Absolutely perfect. But
you can't go on doing this."
He smiled back at her, "All I did was call the restaurant and they
delivered," he replied, "Oh, yeah, and I set the table. Really hard work,"
he ended with a grin."
"It's very sweet. But it's not what I meant, and you know that, Angel,"
Buffy said, leaning her elbows on the table and resting her chin in the palm
of one hand. "What I meant is, you can't keep spoiling me like this. Angel,
you've more or less lived here ever since... Anyway. This has to stop, I'm a
grown up person, and I can't go on using your friendship. I need to take my
life in my own hands again."
His smile faded and he put down his own fork with great care, "Is that how
you feel?" he asked slowly. "That we're friends?"
Buffy frowned for a moment, then a bit irritated, she replied, "Well, yeah."
A tight fist seemed to squeeze his heart and Angel felt as if he'd been
punched in the gut, but managed to sound cool, "I see," he said,
concentrating on breathing slowly, not to lose control. He didn't know why
her answer surprised him so much. Sure, they had kissed once, outside the
Splash, and yeah, she'd reacted, passionately even, but of course that
didn't have to mean anything. What had been one of the most intense moments
for him might have just been a spark of passion for her. He had been so
sure, she had felt it too, but then, he barely knew her anymore. Four years
had passed and although they had spent the last week more or less together,
nothing in her behavior had hinted more than friendship.
She must have sensed the change in his mood because suddenly uncertain, she
reached over the table and covered his large hand with her small one, "Or
did I get that wrong?" she asked anxiously, "I really want you to be my
friend and I want to be yours. That's important for me."
Slowly he raised his head and his eyes met her pleading ones. And if it
might kill him, how could he say no to those eyes, "No, you didn't get that
wrong. Of course I'm your friend." She let go of his hand and obviously
relieved sank back into her chair.
"Good," she smiled. "Still, I think it's time for me to get my life back in
order. And to start I need to sleep on my own again. It was wonderful of you
to stay here. It made me feel safe and all, but you have your own
apartment."
Okay, if she wanted it that way, friendship it was. He closed his eyes for a
moment, then took a deep breath and said with forced cheerfulness, "That's
true, although I'm not so sure that Spike and Dru will be so pleased about
my return."
Her eyes widened for a moment, before she said, "So this is serious, huh?
Who would've thought? They are so... different, I guess. Spike is tough and
forward while Dru's so shy."
"Spike only seems forward. He's actually quite vulnerable, just covers it up
very well," Angel told her, carefully holding on to his control.
"Really?" she asked, and then shrugged, "Well, he certainly does it well. I
would've never guessed it. But Dru was hot for him the moment she saw him."
She rolled her eyes and laughed, "'He's so cute', she said."
They laughed for a moment, and then silence settled over the kitchen.
Clearing his throat, Angel pushed his chair back and stood. "I'm just
putting the dirty stuff away, then I'll be gone."
"Oh no," she stood as well. "I can't let you do that. You ordered the food,
and set the table. The least I can do is clean up afterwards. Besides, I
don't want to keep you, if you have better things to do," she said quickly,
averting her eyes and reaching for the dirty plates.
The moment Angel saw her taking them with trembling fingers he understood.
God, he really was an idiot. Why hadn't he seen it before? "Buffy," he said
and when she didn't look at him, just continued collecting plates and
silverware, he repeated, "Buffy. Look at me."
Slowly her head came up and he could see tears in her eyes. Reaching out he
took the forks from her hands, "You don't want me to go, do you?" he asked,
his eyes never letting go of hers.
"Wha-" her voice cracked and she had to clear her throat, "I don't?"
Slowly he shook his head and took her hand in his, pulling it to his mouth,
while his eyes were still holding hers captured. With great care he planted
a kiss on each of her fingers, then turned her hand and planted another on
her palm.
He felt the shiver running through her arm and her body, heard her breath
catch in her throat, "I already told you that the past is the past," he said
quietly, "This is the future, Buffy. What are you afraid of? Is it really
just friendship you want?"
"I-" her voice cracked a second time, and annoyed with herself she shook her
head, then let out a little self-conscious laugh, "I hurt you very much
and... And I know you said you don't blame me... and... And I know you
kissed me, but that doesn't have to mean anything... and-"
Her rambling ended in a gasp when he pulled her to him, "You're thinking too
much," he growled and her eyes widened in surprise, "Why don't you try
feeling for a change?" he asked, and covered her lips with his.
The instant his lips met hers, passion slammed through him like an
unstoppable runaway train. Touching her face, deepening the kiss, wasn't
enough, he realized with a mixture of joy and despair. God it would never be
enough. He wanted her, all of her, wanted to devour her, wanted to strip her
naked and kiss every part of her body, and then he-
Panting he pulled back, tempted to smile when he saw her closed lids, her
parted lips, slightly swollen from his kiss, "Do you still want me to go?"
he whispered against her mouth.
Her eyes opened slowly, and she looked at him from them, glazed over with
passion that made his groin tighten, "No," she whispered back. "I don't want
you to go." And with this she pulled his head back down.
Her lips parted, and her tongue flicked out, tracing his mouth, probing for
entry. He groaned, and thrust one hand into her hair, pulling her even
closer, her hot mouth tightly locked with his, he clamped his other arm
around her hips, dragging her soft body against his groin.
His mind and body had been waiting for this so long it was like touching
fire. He had the feeling that he wasn't able to move anymore, wasn't able to
breathe. All he could do was feel and taste. Her silken lips against his,
her breasts pressed to his chest, her hips undulating against his growing
erection.
There was a split second when he might have been able to pull back, but then
she moaned in his mouth, her arms tightening around his neck, and Angel was
lost. His heart was in frenzy, his body was screaming for fulfillment, while
light seemed to explode behind his eyes. This was Buffy, this was what
he had dreamed of in the nights of four long, lonely years and now she was
here, in his arms, and wanting him the same way he wanted her.
He made a low sound in his throat and lifted her in his arms. Without
breaking the kiss he walked towards the living room, stripping him and her
in the process. When they finally reached her couch, they were standing in
front of each other in their underwear.
She opened her eyes for the second time tonight, when he broke the kiss for
a moment, and looked around a little bit disoriented. "Buffy?" he forced
himself to ask. She nodded, and that was all the invitation he needed.
Their lips met again, and Angel instantly deepened the kiss with a deep,
slow slide of his tongue, tasting her tenderly, thoroughly this time. Then
his mouth left hers and began to explore, nipping at her neck, at her
earlobe, his lips whispered over her face, her chin, down to her throat,
along the line of her bra and he felt her arch her back to him.
"You're beautiful," he murmured, "so very beautiful."
She moaned again, pulling him closer, her hands traveling lower, tugging at
his boxers, and he helped her get rid of them. With another move he'd
removed her slip and her bra and then it was skin to skin, with no more
barriers, no more layers between them. They were laying on the living room
carpet, the moon shining through the window, bathing the two bare bodies
into a silver light.
Angel continued kissing her body, his mouth traveling lower, his tongue
darting in her belly-button, circling it, the action making her moan again.
"Angel," she hissed, almost mad with passion.
"Easy, baby, easy," he murmured again, breathing kisses against her inner
thighs, then traveling up again, until he found her already dripping center.
He heard her drawing a sharp breath when his tongue stroked slowly over her
clit, and she buried her hands in his hair, her hips arching against his
mouth.
"Oh God," he heard her moan. "Oh God, Angel. No, I want..."
"What?" he looked up, "What do you want, sweet?"
"I want you," she croaked.
"You've got me," he said with a smile in his voice, lowering his head again.
But her hands held him back. "No," she shook her head wildly, her eyes
opening, she looked at him frantically, "I want you inside of me," she said,
already spinning out of control, "I want to come with you inside of me."
Her words made his restraint snap. He moved upward, grasped her waist and
roller her on top of him.
Her eyes flew open, "Angel, what-"
Without words he curled upward to take her nipple into his mouth. She cried
out at the pleasure. Angel made a rough sound in his throat and took her
nipple between his teeth, rubbing them across, while he shifted her in his
lap, his arousal teasing her dripping entrance. "Oh... God," she gasped,
wiggling to get him inside of her.
He shifted her for a second time, pulling her legs on either side of his
hips, clamped his hands on her waist, lifted her for a moment only to
bring her down on his aching, rock hard erection. Buffy hissed again,
feeling him fill her, feeling every inch of him entering her. Her eyes
opened and widened, her breath caught. He smiled into her eyes and then
brought her down the rest of the way.
The world exploded in a shower of stars and Buffy screamed, clutching his
shoulders, holding him, and craving him.
With a fluid motion he rolled them around, so that he was on top, still
deeply imbedded in her and then he started to move. "Open your eyes," he
ordered, and she did, "I want you to look at me," he told her, his voice
almost a growl.
Buffy had the feeling she would either dissolve or die. It
was too much. It was too good, too...
Suddenly his big body tensed above hers, he began to shudder, a low moan
coming from his mouth and with a final trust he cried out her name, "BUFFY!"
That was enough for her, the expression on his face, and the expression of
love in his eyes, the way he cried out her name - it drove her over the
edge. With a sob she followed him into oblivion.
*
It was some time later until Buffy found enough energy to open her eyes
again. They were still intimately entwined, Angel still lying partly on top
of her on the living room floor.
Feeling her move under him, he opened his eyes as well, "I'm sorry," he
said, his voice sleepy, "I didn't mean to crush you."
"No," she tightened her arms, to hold him in place, not willing to let him
go. "I like feeling your weight," she protested, but he nevertheless rolled
them around so that she was now lying on top of him.
"I'm too heavy," he said with a smile, one hand coming up, tracing the line
of her brow. "Especially with the carpet underneath us."
"That's what I was wondering," she replied resting her chin on his chest.
"Why didn't you take the bed?"
"I'm not really interested in making love to you in a bed where you and..."
he just trailed off, but Buffy had no problems understanding him.
"Riley and I never made love there."
"Oh, sure, you were married for four years-"
"Three and a half, we were only living together for three and a half," she
insisted.
"Okay, so three and a half," he replied, annoyance rising in him. Did one
time more or less matter? "But you can't tell me you never slept with him."
"I didn't say that. Of course I slept with him," she told him and when he
raised a brow, she slapped his shoulder, "Don't look at me like that. I said
we never made love. How could we?" her voice changed all of a sudden, "You
can only make love when it means something to you, and I can only make love
when I'm in love, so as far as I'm concerned I made love only with one man
in my life."
His throat was suddenly dry as emotions were threading to choke him. With a
muffled sound, he pulled her close and held her. He was a bit rough, but
they both didn't care, "God, I love you," he said hoarsely, kissing the top
of her head, his hands warm on her back.
"You... love me?" her eyes were suddenly moist and she was staring at him
with disbelief.
"Of course I love you," he replied. "I never stopped loving you."
"Oh, Angel," now she couldn't stop the tears anymore. "I love you too. I
love you so much. I never stopped either."
"There were days," he admitted, his voice hoarse, "when I thought I'd die. I
missed you so much. I-" he shook his head, blinking tears away, the emotions
too deep to put into words.
"It was the same for me," she assured him, pressing her mouth to his chest,
inhaling his scent, loving the smooth feeling of his skin under her lips.
"And I thought you'd never forgive me for what I'd done," she admitted
brokenly. "I love you," she cried, her mouth, wet with her tears and soon
with his met his again. "Please love me, Angel. Love me."
"Always," he replied and they lost themselves in each other again.
... to be continued
