"Okay...." said Zim. He walked past Gir, down the street, and into the home base (which they thankfully landed quite near). Gir, who was humming the Doom Song, skipped along behind Zim and followed him inside.

"I must test myself to discover if I am a carrier of Irken Brain Fungus.... But how could Dib get it? And why aren't my brain cells exploding, evacuating, catching flame and whatnot? COMPUTER! Take me to the labs!" The slab of floor underneath Zim formed a circular platform and descended to one of Zim's labs.

Meanwhile, back in front of the convention area, nightfall had set in, and Dib had somewhat regained control of his spasms. Ms. Bitters was slapping herself with slices of clown kidneys across the street. She didn't seem to notice that Dib was still there. (All the freakish, snobby nerds had left long ago.)

Then, the brain malfunction set in again without warning. Dib doubled over, shouting, "I have peppermint flavored blood, and I have the power to speak to snails!!"

Back in the lab, Zim was pressing various buttons to test some of his cells (and perhaps give himself a new set of antennae), when all of a sudden, his right eye imploded upon itself.

"AHHHHHHHHH!!!" exclaimed Zim as he covered his eye with both of his hands. He quickly re-gained his composure and decided to wait until a new one grew back.

*Six Weeks Later*

Zim opened his eyelid and a new eye had grown where the other had imploded. He resumed the scan for the Irken Brain fungus, and was relieved to know that he was only a carrier and not infected. "But how did Dib get it..?" wondered Zim.

"Maybe it was when he was snooping around the house two nights ago?" asked Gir.

"You knew this and you didn't tell me?" replied Zim.

"I must've forgotten. The scary monkey show was on," replied Gir.

"What happened?" demanded Zim, looming over GIR and looking very cross.

"Well, I went down to the store to get a Brainfreezy when I decided that I was going use a pair of tweezers on the guy at the taco place and maybe giraffes would be good to lick, I'm not sure, what do nose hairs taste like?"

"Excuse me?" said Zim, squinting his newly regrown eye and looking a bit worried.

"One time, a bunch of homicidal mimes attacked this guy, and they ate his eyelids 'cause they were cannabalistic, and that's how Einstein's theory of relativity came about."

"But that's nonsensical!"

"And so is my popcorn juice," replied Gir.

"GIR! Explain yourself!!" shrieked Zim impatiently.

"I have ammunition and various types of weaponry in my pants!"

"Gir, you aren't wearing any pants!"

"I know, Master, but they're there! I can sense them with my ability to see through skin!" Gir said in a freakishly excited way.

Zim gave up. He then recalled that Ms. Bitters was saying strange, pointless things at the convention, and Dib, obviously was freaking out too. And now GIR, who, after his murderous spasms, was saying even more nonsensical things than usual. Perhaps they all had become infected with Irken Brain Fungus...but GIR didn't have a brain.....it was all so....wrong....

GIR walked down the street and spotted George Lucas walking down the very same street. George's trademark flannel shirt set off Gir's murderous rage once again and pounced on George Lucas. Gaz was walking by as well, and quickly ran over and pulled Gir off George Lucas. "That's one messed up droid!" exclaimed George Lucas. He then ran screaming.

Gaz and Gir didn't notice Jhonen Vasquez crossing the street, trying to negotiate the rights to Noodle Man with Johnny, The Homicidal Maniac.

"Freak," muttered Gaz, looking down at GIR with an evil eye. GIR looked up and began drooling as he saw Jhonen come walking toward them. Zim, who was worried that GIR was going to kill someone else, came running out of the home base door and looked wildly around. He saw a tall, thin guy wearing glasses, and a trench coat; and then there was GIR, who was having another spasm (non-homicidal, there wasn't any flannel in sight anymore) and was again saying nonsensical things.

Zim's mind may as well have burst into pieces, as he looked on, unsure of what to do, if he could do anything. "Gubernatorial fajitas! NO!!! I TOLD YOU NOT TO PULL THE TRIGGER!!! Beware, for the horsefly will command you!!"

GIR was foaming at the mouth (if it's possible for a robot to do). "I must go lick some hubcaps in motion now!"

Zim grabbed Gir and ran back into the house, where he hooked Gir up to the computer, in hopes of finding out when, how, and why Dib broke into Zim's lair. He sorted through Gir's files, which contained just three items: Pink rubber piggies, a nachos recipe, and 101 ways to eat a taco. (The last one was a work in progress.) Zim almost gave up hope when he noticed another file marked "Dib." Zim clicked on the file, and was treated to footage of Dib walking around the lair.

"Is my security that bad?" wondered Zim to himself, again thoughtfully rubbing a sore where his right antennae had once been.

GIR seemed not to notice that he had been hooked up to a computer, and began to hum "Around the World" by ATC. Zim's attention remained on the monitor, which showed Dib carefully creeping around corners into the kitchen, where he ate a cupcake from an earlier batch of GIR's! Zim decided that whatever had infected him was in the cupcakes.

"GIR!"

"Yes, Master?"

"What do you put in your cupcakes?"

"Oh....lotsa stuff. Grapefruit juice, ketchup, milk..."

"Maybe that's where it comes from, it's not Irken Brain Fungus at all...but how did Ms. Bitters begin raving nonsensical thingies?"

Suddenly, the video feed got really staticy, then the video returned. Instead of Dib, it was Miss Bitters stealing a cupcake.

"My security is that BAD!!!" exclaimed Zim.

"AHHHHHHHHH!!!!" screamed Gir, who promptly got up and went to go watch the Scary Monkey show.

"The cupcakes are it! They are the source of the mysterious brain rot!" exclaimed Zim.

And then from GIR in the other room --- "WAHOOO! Brainfreezy! LICK ME, JOHNNY!!!"

Zim didn't want to know. He really didn't. He pressed a button on his computer panel and his antennae sores began to glow lime green. Suddenly, a pair of new antennae shot out of his head and replaced the old ones. He ignored this. He was more worried by GIR's last comments. Zim shut his eyes and took a lift to ground level to check on GIR.

[Less Demented, yet Handsomely dashing Author's Note: I should point out at this incredibly odd point that we are not saying Dib is a nerd, but instead is going to a convention frequented by scary nerds. That is all. We will now return to your regularly scheduled story, already in progress...]

Zim found, much to his surprise, Gir sitting on the sofa, with a Brainfreezy (Chocolate Mint, of course.) and reading the latest Johnny, the Homicidal Maniac book. Zim breathed a huge sigh of relief until Jhonen Vasquez walked out of the bathroom wearing nothing but a frilly pink bathrobe. He went into convulsions and passed out.