The sad tale of the Yaoi Flamer or Why you shouldn't send angry emails to
fans of yaoi/shonen-ai fanfic writers by Shy Violet
"The kissy-lovey-fluff fest of Yaoi (two guys kissing/ having sex)" the banner proclaims. And sitting ever so sweetly under it, are our boys. Trowa snuggled closer to his koi on the big overstuffed laz-y-boy. "I luv you Quatre." He says chibily, kissing his forehead. Quatre grins and blushes. "I luv you too, Trowa-chan" he said, blinking large hopeful eyes in his boyfriends direction.
They wrapped each other in a long embrace- "HE?" A tiny red demon carrying a pitchfork runs in, shouting angrily and trying to look scary, completely ignoring the large warning banner. "But the first one was a he too! They're kissing." he shudders. "And embracing.. That is just sick!" Trowa blushes and blinks cutely. "Who are you?" the demon glares at him, shaking the pitchfork in his general direction. "What? You've never heard of me! I'm the third strongest demon on the Internet, behind my adopted cousins, Parental Restrictions and Slowly Loading Graphics. I am the Yaoi flamer!"
Quatre stuck his tongue out and leaned over to whisper into Trowa's ear. "I've heard of him all right. He's weak and not very smart, and seems to have no life at all. I suggest we ignore him and you can ravish me like we did last night. Ok?" Trowa just laughed. "Did he just say he was a flamer?" He turned to the demon, hopping mad by now and grinned a lecherous grin. "You don't really seem like the flaming type.but whatever floats your boat." The Yaoi flamer stomped his chubby and deceptively cute little foot, causing a puff of smoke to appear. "No No No! I am not A flamer! I am THE flamer! I flame things! See?" He pulled his clawed harnds back and began to chant. " U suck! Pervert! Write some straight stuff! YAOI IS NASTY AND SO R U! YAOI FLAMER!!!"
With an almost Elton Jon-esk flourish, he shot forth a pea sized glob of sickly gray fire to skitter at the boy's feet. Quatre rose from his chair, sighing heavily. "Look little buddy, it's like I told you when you visited my web site last week.I'm not gonna just change for a little idiot like you!" The demon's normally red face when ashen and pale. "It's.It's you! HentaiBondageYaoiLemonWriter-chan!" Quatre grinned. "On my better days." Trowa looked confusedly from one flamer to the next. The Yaoi flamer offended, by that last sentence, glared at him. "What's wrong fairy-boy? Didn't know what a perv your.." He shudderd as if the next word burned his lips. ".koi.is?" Trowa grinned "Nah, I already knew that.the name is surprising though."
Quatre advanced on the tiny creature. "So you don't like YAOI huh?" He cackles evilly. "Well" the two chibis say together as they advance on the tiny flamer. "we HATE flamers."
Exactly 3 belly-poking-feet tickling-forced dojinshi reading-"Fake"watching hours later..
The YAOI flamer was tied to a pole, uner a fire lit with old issues of "Playboy", shuddering. "No! Please don't make me say it!" Trowa grinned, brandishing another "Duo fights for top" dojinshi. "Say it Flamer! Or you'll be sorry." The demon took a long breath. "Tamahome should ditch Miyaka for an 3 way with Hotohori and Nuriko" He wailed and dissovled into sobs. "WAH!!! I wish I was dead." Quatre grinned and poked him with an ever so handy stick. "Ooo! Angst! You may have it in you yet, little guy." He coughed. "And I do mean.little." he winked and pinched the Creature's chubby pink cheek. "By the way.has anyone ever told you you're.cute.when you're angry?" NOOOOOO!!!
Author's Note- Don't flame me.I don't like it at all.see above nonsense for more info..
"The kissy-lovey-fluff fest of Yaoi (two guys kissing/ having sex)" the banner proclaims. And sitting ever so sweetly under it, are our boys. Trowa snuggled closer to his koi on the big overstuffed laz-y-boy. "I luv you Quatre." He says chibily, kissing his forehead. Quatre grins and blushes. "I luv you too, Trowa-chan" he said, blinking large hopeful eyes in his boyfriends direction.
They wrapped each other in a long embrace- "HE?" A tiny red demon carrying a pitchfork runs in, shouting angrily and trying to look scary, completely ignoring the large warning banner. "But the first one was a he too! They're kissing." he shudders. "And embracing.. That is just sick!" Trowa blushes and blinks cutely. "Who are you?" the demon glares at him, shaking the pitchfork in his general direction. "What? You've never heard of me! I'm the third strongest demon on the Internet, behind my adopted cousins, Parental Restrictions and Slowly Loading Graphics. I am the Yaoi flamer!"
Quatre stuck his tongue out and leaned over to whisper into Trowa's ear. "I've heard of him all right. He's weak and not very smart, and seems to have no life at all. I suggest we ignore him and you can ravish me like we did last night. Ok?" Trowa just laughed. "Did he just say he was a flamer?" He turned to the demon, hopping mad by now and grinned a lecherous grin. "You don't really seem like the flaming type.but whatever floats your boat." The Yaoi flamer stomped his chubby and deceptively cute little foot, causing a puff of smoke to appear. "No No No! I am not A flamer! I am THE flamer! I flame things! See?" He pulled his clawed harnds back and began to chant. " U suck! Pervert! Write some straight stuff! YAOI IS NASTY AND SO R U! YAOI FLAMER!!!"
With an almost Elton Jon-esk flourish, he shot forth a pea sized glob of sickly gray fire to skitter at the boy's feet. Quatre rose from his chair, sighing heavily. "Look little buddy, it's like I told you when you visited my web site last week.I'm not gonna just change for a little idiot like you!" The demon's normally red face when ashen and pale. "It's.It's you! HentaiBondageYaoiLemonWriter-chan!" Quatre grinned. "On my better days." Trowa looked confusedly from one flamer to the next. The Yaoi flamer offended, by that last sentence, glared at him. "What's wrong fairy-boy? Didn't know what a perv your.." He shudderd as if the next word burned his lips. ".koi.is?" Trowa grinned "Nah, I already knew that.the name is surprising though."
Quatre advanced on the tiny creature. "So you don't like YAOI huh?" He cackles evilly. "Well" the two chibis say together as they advance on the tiny flamer. "we HATE flamers."
Exactly 3 belly-poking-feet tickling-forced dojinshi reading-"Fake"watching hours later..
The YAOI flamer was tied to a pole, uner a fire lit with old issues of "Playboy", shuddering. "No! Please don't make me say it!" Trowa grinned, brandishing another "Duo fights for top" dojinshi. "Say it Flamer! Or you'll be sorry." The demon took a long breath. "Tamahome should ditch Miyaka for an 3 way with Hotohori and Nuriko" He wailed and dissovled into sobs. "WAH!!! I wish I was dead." Quatre grinned and poked him with an ever so handy stick. "Ooo! Angst! You may have it in you yet, little guy." He coughed. "And I do mean.little." he winked and pinched the Creature's chubby pink cheek. "By the way.has anyone ever told you you're.cute.when you're angry?" NOOOOOO!!!
Author's Note- Don't flame me.I don't like it at all.see above nonsense for more info..
