Twin Streams
Ch 2: Why Not?

The wait was beginning to irritate her.

This was the main point on Sailor Pluto's (a.k.a. Meioh Setsuna) mind.

The wait was getting on her nerves. It could be taken as slightly humorous that such a trivial thing as waiting still could bother Setsuna, after all, she had been sitting in front of a damn doorway for about three thousand freaking years. Then all of a sudden some prick by the name of Rezo the Red Priest (what's up with that long-ass name, anyhow?) pops up out of nowhere, picks a fight, and changes her view on life.

Jackass.

Setsuna allowed herself a little smirk. Not much, but enough to display her pleasure at setting up such a mind-bogglingly devious trap for the little....GRRR.... that no one would be able to escape anything of the sort. In all of her time watching over all of the Time Stream, Setsuna had become intimately acquainted with thousands and thousands of forms of traps. Magical traps were simply an extension of physical traps, reaching into the surrounding area's pool of mana. This in combination with some fairly heavy metal bars, a pressure plate, motion sensors, laser trajectory calculation devices, infrared heat sensors, UV radiation dampers, and a big, big spike practically guaranteed the capture of one arrogant priest, and his subsequent... disposal. All of that technical crap had been absurdly expensive. However, with a little careful manipulation in the past, quite a sizable sum had been saved under one of her aliases, one William Gates. It really wore down on her to have to take on the body of a man from time to time, much more so that of one who looked like a turtle, but it paid off. Big time.

Now if only little Priest-boy would show up and let the trap fall on him.

She had tried looking into the Time Stream for this particular event, but for some reason the future was closed off to her. There was only one being with the power to do such a thing, and that was her future self. Thus meaning that whatever happened, she would be all right in the end. This decided, she then just had to wait until he showed up and let whatever happened happen. There still was a chance that things would not go as planned, but that never stopped her before. She would just have to do everything in her power to make sure that everything turned out OK for her Crystal Tokyo in the end. If that meant ruining five hours of planning and execution by killing him off before gloating over him, then it would have to be done.

In an uncharacteristic display of emotion, Setsuna tilted her head back to laugh maniacally. In truth, it really didn't come out all that impressive as, say, Kodachi's howling fit of banshee-like bursts of evil " HOHOHO"s. Nevertheless, it still had the desired effect on Setsuna's ego, thus making her feel all warm and fuzzy like a kitten who had just caught a mouse. Hm... so that's why all those 'blasted nega-verse creeps' laugh like that, she thought.

"You know, coming from you, that has to be one of the scariest things I have ever heard."

Hearing that voice froze the blood in Setsuna's veins. He was here. And all it would take was the press of the little red button on the little round controller she held in her had to ensnare that bastard in a trap without escape of any kind.

Again she allowed herself a little smirk.

This was going to be fun.

-----------------------------

Rezo had intentionally waited for Setsuna to gather her thoughts in herself before leaving. He knew perfectly well that this little wait had given her enough time to set up any manner of traps. In fact, it had been damn well enough time for her to collect herself and prepare to blast the hell out of him with something like a Giga Slave. If she had enough power for that sort of thing. And a special relationship with the Lord of Nightmares, queen of the Mazoku, the strongest force in all Darkness, the leader of those without souls, and all that other gibberish.

Rezo certainly didn't have that spell at his disposal. If he had, then he would have ruled the word, just for fun. It wasn't that he didn't have enough power for that kind of world shattering thing, it was just that somehow back in the years he had managed to piss of the Lord of Nightmares. Certainly not one of his more... intelligent feats, yet one of them none the less. Somehow, it seemed, the Lord did not take kindly to little jokes and some... shall we say, interesting comments from Rezo regarding the Lord's personal background and upbringing. And mother.

If there is one universal law to abide by, you do not mess with all-powerful, god-like beings and their mothers. The Lord's response was to curse Rezo to wander the earth forever, until he revoked his beliefs that the Lord was a 'a thieving bastard whose mother was a hamster and whose father smelt of elderberries.'

Sound familiar?

Rezo smiled a little bit as he took his little stroll down memory lane. Too bad that he had taken his apparent immortality as a boon of unimaginable proportions, bestowed on him by a forgiving and loving Lord of Nightmares. That just pissed the bitch off more. Now, the Lord had vowed never to pay attention to the little mortal who insulted her, and only to listen to those who wished to kill the jackass.

Oh, well.

Rezo hefted his new battle staff. It was considerably heavy, but nothing more than his previous staff. He could have made it lightweight, but where would the fun be in that? Besides, as the old adage in his priesthood went; 'the heavier the staff, the more will the mind needs to wield it.' Whatever the hell that meant.

It was no secret that Rezo had joined the Priesthood only so that he could cure his eyes, and after some thirty years of selflessly devoting himself to the lessons, toiling day in and day out under the burning sun finding inner peace and calmness so that he might use the more powerful spells in white magic, and studying for endless hours upon hours the ancient texts describing those very techniques that he realized that it was all just a bunch of religious mumbo jumbo surrounding raw power, and if he could harness that raw power without having to sit on a rock at the top of a mountain naked meditating on exactly what the wind was doing to his then straight and flowing hair, then all the better, thank you very much. When he confronted the head priests about this little problem between what he was actually doing and the end result, he had been totally surprised by their reaction.

The entire council of Head Priests, to whom he had devoted much of his life and loyalty to for some thirty years, stood as one, and gave him a long round of applause. This quickly evolved into general hooting and hollering at him in congratulations and general merriment. When the commotion had died down into heavy drinking, they had finally explained to him that the whole thing was just a test. It seemed that the entire host of Head Priests had too figured this out, and had then subsequently been ushered into the higher ranks of the order, where they were then taught the real techniques.

This was upsetting. Thirty long years of hard labor under the burning sun and all that nonsense was REALLY and TRULY ::pause for dramatic effect:: NONSENSE!?!?!?! WHAT THE HELL KIND OF SHIT IS THIS?!?!?!? This was his actual reaction to the news as well, which was also followed by a round of applause. He was then welcomed into the ranks of the Red Order.

Rezo's left eye twitched slightly. If he was going to sit around all day becoming so damn nostalgic about his younger years then he might as well give up on the whole damn time/dimensional travel bit and sit around at home as an old senile man. Which he was not. Three hundred years young, thank you. And with his extensive knowledge of white magic, he would probably never age. All the better, as he still needed to find a cure for his blindness. One time, long ago, he had found a....

Rezo bashed himself over the head with his staff. The ringing in his ears was a good thing. It would keep his mind on the task ahead. Right.

" WAKAZOO!!!" He bellowed, instantly transporting to the Gate of Time.

This time when he appeared, he was standing right next to the Gates. Must've gotten lucky this time... he thought. When he rounded the corner, a strange sight revealed itself before him.

Sailor Pluto was... LAUGHING.

It wasn't just laughing per say, it was more like evil maniacal psycho laughter, kind of like his own psycho laugh only more as a woman. Such differences do make a difference you know. Once, long ago, he had met a....

Rezo abruptly turned and bashed his head against one of the side pillars of the Gates of Time. He was not going to lose control now. Especially with her standing right over there, laughing. What the hell was up with that anyway? Every time he had showed up before, albeit two times, but you really get the feel of someone in the first two times you meet them. There was one time when Rezo had...

Twelve successive head-buts on the pillar later, Rezo had regained enough control to turn around the pillar and speak to Sailor Pluto. "You know, coming from you, that has to be one of the scariest things I have ever heard."

This unexpected arrival had the desired effect on Setsuna, making her freeze up and hunch over in such a way as to totally betray whatever she was planning to do. With her little motion, anyone could tell that she had been planning to do something to the Priest, probably involving the little metal cylinder-thing in her left hand. The motion her body had gone through was an exact replica of what most children do when their hand gets stuck in a cookie jar and their mom shows up and asks them what they think they're doing.

Kind of funny really.

"So, you showed up," Setsuna said, her confidence showing through in her words. "Too bad you wont be leaving." With that said she raised her hand and pushed the red button on the controller.

Out of nowhere, hundreds of bars shot out on all sides, all of them with intended destinations mapped out by the laser trajectory thingies. They all rammed into the body of Rezo, in all of the sensitive areas, as well as firing across and around his body like a. in close metal cage/torture device. Rezo's staff was knocked out of his hand and flew straight out to Setsuna's feet. Now, with his arms and legs pinned together and at the sides of his body, his head held in place by metal bars that threatened to crush his skull at any moment, and a big, big spike positioned over his most vital organ (within which the ability to reproduce is held, you know the one.), he was helpless.

The fact that the bars were enchanted to heat up and burn him to a crisp at any moment did not escape his notice. The same with the now semi-perfected maniacal laughter coming from Sailor Pluto. "So, dear Rezo. Were you expecting such a trick from your Ancient Goddess? OH-HOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!!!"

"Actually I was expecting something a little more involved, but this isn't that disappointing," Rezo said truthfully. It wasn't a bad trick, but with a little bit of work he would be out in no less than two words.

"Do not think about escape, Rezo. If you try any of your black magic on this contraption, it will do no more than make the bars grow hotter. If you do anything more than a simple light spell, you will be destroyed."

"Thank you for the warning," Rezo with real gratitude in his voice. "So, did you have some questions you would like me to answer?"

Setsuna was flabbergasted. The priest seemed totally unconcerned about the existence of the trap she had worked to hard to employ on him. Even the magic, which had been something of a stretch for her to be able to conjure up (as she had little experience in any magic beyond her Dead Scream) should have had anyone fairly well quivering in terror. His willingness to answer questions was maddening.
"All right. What is your real name?"

"Rezo is my real name. There is nothing more than Rezo, and there never was. Next?"

"Where do you come from?"

"At this point I'm fairly certain I'm from another dimension than you, as there is no further mention of you in any more than one book. I imagine that there would be thousands of legends about someone like you, and the Gates of Time. If you really want to be exact though, I came here from 43rd Lightsword Ave., Sairaag, Sairaag 78768. Next?"

"Who the do you think you are coming here? No one has any right to be here beyond myself and my Queen!"

"In honesty, I think I am an all powerful god-like being who can get out of this trap so easily that it's not even funny to think about, and I'm only sitting here because it amuses me to a certain point how stupid you silly mortals can be. It is at this point that I would like to add a brief burst of psychotic laughter to my diatribe, however I do not wish to anger you more than you already have been. Next?"

Sailor Pluto was... angry. There really is no other way to describe the emotion she was feeling at this point beyond that simple word. Any more addition to it and it would be marred by unnecessary detail.

"What do you mean escape from that trap?"

"I mean that this trap will only stop black magic. Nothing else. For example; BLAM BLAZER!!!"

And with a brief burst of blue light, the bars blasted off and melted away around Rezo. The cloud of smoke cleared away from Rezo in a well practiced manner to make him seem all the much greater and more magnificent than he really was. A great magical aura of burning yellow and blue came forth around Rezo, and eerie mists began swirling about him as if he were an ancient god, incarnate on Earth.

"So, Sailor Pluto. We will now begin with your interrogation session."

Setsuna was afraid. For anything to have that kind of magical aura, they had to be one hell of a strong-ass magic user. For any kind of battle aura, one had to be immensely strong, much stronger than she was. They also had to be immensely evil. There was no way that anyone with that kind of power could remain uncorrupted, and the fact that he was using black magic only went further to prove her point. That spell he had used earlier, however, that was definitely not black magic. It was something natural, peaceful in nature. How he could perverse such power to his needs was definitely beyond her. He had to be incredibly skilled in magic... and now he was going to use that skill against her.

Without further blathering, Rezo raised his staff to the sky and crashed it mightily into the ground. The rings crashed together in an almost musical note, shattering the silence of the air. Without warning, the ground all around Setsuna erupted upwards, seemingly like a sentient creature, and enveloped her entire body, except for her face.

"Like it? Its a fairly complicated trick, especially until you get the hang of casting six or seven different spells at the same time, but I'm sure you will be able to figure it out when I'm done. However, please note that there is an enchantment on this thing to constrict if you lie to me. Lie more than three times, and your head will pop off."

"You BASTARD!!!"

"I've been called worse. Besides, I have an old friend who calls me worse than that every time I write to that jackass. Ah, well. Friends are more important than silly disputes, don't you think?"

"I'll KILL YOU!!!"

"Sure you will. But first you will answer a few questions."

"I'D RATHER DIE!!!"

"That can be arranged. Or would you rather stay alive so that you can live to make certain your queen lives through the night using your Gates? I know what you've been doing, its not that hard to guess at it."

"ROT IN HELL!!!"

"I know perfectly well where I'm going when I die, thank you. No need to get huffy over it. Now, Sailor Pluto, what is your name in reality?"

"I.... I... I am called Meioh Setsuna in my reality."

"Setsuna? Thats a nice name. You really shouldn't go around giving out fake names. Sailor Pluto. Bah, that has to be the dumbest name I've ever heard. Anyway, Setsu-chan, what is the name of your queen?"

"...My queen is named Serenity..." The solid rock encasing her began to constrict slightly. "She was Serenity! She was Serenity, then she died and got reborn as Usagi..."

"She knows the Reincarnation spell? Hmm, thats a bit complex for a rabbit, don't you think? Well, if she knows the Reincarnation spell, she has to be a powerful white magic user. Is your queen a powerful white magic user?

"...she is..."

"Very good. Now, you are called Sailor Pluto. Is this a name that you came up with by yourself? Or was it appointed by your queen?"

"...It was appointed..."

"Great. If you would stop pausing before you answer to consider whether or not telling me will compromise your security or whatever, that would be a great help, and I will let you out a little earlier. So, are there any other Sailor whatevers I should know about?"

"No." Again, the rock began to constrict. "I mean yes, there are others."

"Oh. Is that so? All right. How many are there, and what are they guarding?"

"There are one for each planet in my solar system. All of them are guarding the Queen."

"Ah. Aha. I take it you want to hide the number of planets in your solar system. all right. Despite the fact that my world isn't that strong in the science department, we do know how many that is. Thats what, five? Not so bad. How many of them are stronger than you?"

"Only two."

"Two of them are stronger than you. Shouldn't be too bad. Unless one of them has the equivalent of a dragon slave up their sleeve. Tell me, does one of your Sailors have the power to blow up a city in one spell?"

"No." Strictly speaking it wasn't a lie. Sailor Saturn wasn't awake yet, and even though it would be terrible to have someone around who could blow up an entire planet with three words, she would be a great weapon to use against Rezo.

" All right Setsu-chan. I believe you. But for the moment, I think it would be better for you to...take a brief break." Rezo smiled disarmingly. " Oyasumi nasai, Setsuna."

Rezo lifted his arm, and with a slight thought and a flick of the wrist, a powerful sleep spell hit Setsuna, sending her off to lala land faster than she could register it.

Rezo then turned to the Gates of Time. Time to see what this can do.....

-----------------------------

Darkness surrounded Setsuna. It was the darkness at the end of time, she knew. It was the one thing that she knew she could never stop, then end of all things, the Armageddon, the Apocalypse, the End. It was something that had haunted her dreams ever since the first day she took her post as Guardian of Time.

The initiation test for the Senshi of Time was traditionally a brief, straight to the point ceremony, comprising a fifteen minute period when the candidate would see all of the entire future of the Universe. Needless to say, there was a whole fuck of a lot of future to the Universe, but always, no matter how one looked at it, the end of the Universe happened the same way every time, at the exact same point in time. It was the End that truly proved whether or not one was fit to be a Senshi. The test had been known to shatter even the most hardened mind, and there was no defense against nothingness.

Every Senshi had nightmares about the end. It was the one thing out of their control. Therefore, it was the biggest and most terrifying thing to ever occur anywhere on the Time Stream. The fact that time did not exist after it was merely a side effect.

Setsuna stared at the blackness, fearing its cold grip on her. She could not make out anything in the pitch, not her own body, not moving shapes, nothing. The cold clawed at her heart, and the agony of being torn to shreds by invisible forces ripped through her body. There was no defense. All she could do was scream.

Setsuna sat bolt upright, screaming. It was... a dream... No. A nightmare. Setsuna rubbed her head. She glanced around her room within the mists of Pluto. Nothing but an evil dream...

With a jolt she remembered the Red Priest. Everything that had taken place only the day before. Her ordeal at the hands of that foul and evil being, bent solely apon the destruction of the Time Stream and the end of Crystal Tokyo. HE MUST BE DESTROYED!!!!!

Setsuna summoned her Garnet Rod to her side. That bastard had the audacity to waltz on into her realm, challenge her, then incapacitate her, and THEN jam her into her room, possibly while taking advantage of her? She shuddered at the thought. No, it was impossible to remove a Senshi's uniform without casting the proper spell. However, she was dressed as she had been before... Perhaps he knew both the casting and uncasting spells for the uniforms? That would be a definitely bad thing. He would be able to strip the Senshi of their power and dignity within seconds, thus winning any battle with them in moments. Any being with that kind of power had to be evil. There was just no way around it.

She marched out of her rooms and into the mists outside of them. She marched as an executioner would go to the execution of her worst enemy. She wanted him DEAD!!! GRAAAAAAAAAGHHHH!!!!

She continued in this vein of thought before thoroughly faceplanting into the nonexistent ground in front of the Gates of Time. Just in front of the Gates of Time sat Rezo the Red Priest, dressed in loose-fitting khaki pants and a white shirt, sitting on a large sofa, drinking beer, eating potato chips, and idly flicking a remote control at the Gates of Time, changing the image with every press of a button.

Somehow, the image failed to register in her mind.

" WAZZZAAAAAA!!!" Rezo said, spinning around suddenly to face her.

Still, the image failed to register.

" I must say, your world has some damn interesting culture."

Still, blank.

"If I didn't look in on your past, I would think there was something wrong about the fact that you're wearing pink bunny slippers and look hung over."

This snapped Sailor Pluto out of her reverie. "WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK THAT YOU'RE DOING YOU FREAKING MORON!!!"

"Down kitty, I mean you no harm."

"'DOWN KITTY'!?!?!?! WHATTHEFUCKINGHELLDOYOUFUCKING MEAN DOWN KITTY!!!!!!"

"I mean, in my time here, I have done no harm to your little world besides liberating the items you see before you from unseemly fires and such." Rezo waved a hand at the sofa and his clothing. "Took a hell of a time to find stuff that fit. Haha!!! 'Stuff.' What an interesting word. I don't think I know any equivalent to the American word 'Stuff.' Its like a conversation in one word! 'Hey Rezo, what are you doing?' 'Stuff.'"

Setsuna took two deep breaths and whispered out with them "Dead Scream."

The Hissy-Fit Purple Fireball (TM) blasted out of the end of her rod, blasting in toward Rezo's Face. Rezo casualy deflected it with the wave of a hand. "Sweetie, I think you need to stop doing that. Whenever someone throws a fireball around your T.V. here you get bad reception." He indicated the Gates of Time during his statement.

Setsuna was getting pissed. FINE!!! NO MORE PLAY TIME!!!

"DARK DOME ENCLOSE!!!"

"Dark what the what? Setsu-chan, I disabled all of your other spells. Now you can only throw that marginally useful ball of.... whatever it is. Hey cool, Cowboy Bebop is on!!!" Rezo leaned in close toward the Gates of Time. "I love this show. Hey come on, sit down." He patted the bit of sofa next to him.

Setsuna, seeing no other pertinent and non-suicidal action, sat down on the sofa, and attempted to relax and think out what the hell she was going to do with this crazy fool. It was true that he didn't change the Timestream, she could see that in the picture in picture in the lower left part of the screen. Nothing he was doing was truly destructive to her or the Sailors, that was certain. Using the Gates as a television was nothing special, in fact it had been one of her favored activities during the long wait for her Queen to show up.

"Ya know Setsu-chan, you really ought to be less uptight about your visitors. I mean, come on. Its not like you get to meet anyone anyway. You just close yourself off up here in your... wherever this is, doing nothing but sitting around all day watching Spanish soap operas about a man named Juan who has dos mujeres and is screwing them both while you idly sit by and wonder as to why you cant get out and have more fun. Well I say; Live life to its fullest and every second will come with its own enjoyment. You need to take a vacation. You need to get out into that wide blue world and scream out to the masses I AM MEIOU SETSUNA!!! I WILL HAVE FUN!!! If you don't do that, well at least start with small things. Like your hair. You have freaking gorgeous hair. But you always wear white along with it. Try a different color, girl, its a whole new millennium out there. I can think of a way in which you and me can go on a productive vacation for a bit too. Tell ya what; We take a little waltz out into this world of yours for a bit, tell the Sailor whatevers that your going on vacation for a bit, and then search through the world for useful things. Then we hop back up here, and search around through all of time for useful magic and whatnot. I guarantee it'll be fun." Rezo said this last bit with his best grin, calculated perfectly to entice women into his arms.

Thankfully, Setsuna had long since gotten engrossed in Cowboy Bebop and was silently shaking with laughter every time Jet said something funny while he was under the influence of Magical Mushrooms. Otherwise, she would have laughed, slapped Rezo in the face and kicked him out. However, with the influence of the general merriment of the Bebop, she actually considered joining him on his quest to cure his eyes. Not that it was important or anything. Just that she wanted to get out and have some fun and listen to her inner child, that damn nagging bastard inside her who wanted ice cream and chocolate and to run around screaming about the flowers in her hair and the diamond tiara with the HUGE freaking DIAMONDS in it that this SAVIOR had GIVEN her for FREE. Naturally, when considering women and their mental state, it is always best to remember that no matter who they are or what they do, they want their savior to come with huge diamonds which are given for free to them and then to live happily ever after in some castle in Narnia or whatever. It does not have to be in that order however. And besides, five out of six is damn good enough to entice anyone into trying.

"...Sure..." Setsuna said in a mellow, dream-like voice.

Did I do something? Thought Rezo in his head. I didn't use magic or anything... Oh well... I guess she just has no idea how to concentrate on people after spending so damn long in this place... better for me I guess...