(Green Pig:- Last part, sorry I rushed this so much in about ten seconds from beginning to end weeeeheheheh. I think I'm going mad but who cares anyway no one reviews any of my stories that I spend all my time on thinking up great plots and strange new ideas so I may as well just dish out a load of trollop because nobody cares. I didn't even spell-check any of this……geez.)
DISCLAIMER:- Harry Potter belongs to JK Rowling who I am not trying to offend by writing this rubbish, I'm merely having a laugh with myself and my very few friends and even fewer reviewers.
Part Two
Snape came into his office after a hard day's work teaching the rotten children with all their rotten little faces and smelly feet.
He stretched luxuriantly spreading his arms up above him and yawned shakily. Then he saw the broken mirror and remembered who had spoken to him that morning. As if he was about the feed his pet fish and peer into the glass watching them go about their normal fishy lives he looked into the mirror and smiled, showing all his yellow teeth clearly to James and Lily who were indeed still in there fuming at him the moment he came into the room.
"Sod off Snape unless you're going to get Dumbledore and help us out." The little reflection of James snapped looking up from the floor.
"Nah." Snape held up his hand with his wand pointing straight at the glass.
"What are you doing Snape?" Lily asked fearfully.
"Repairing the mirror; should've done that this morning."
"NO!" The two reflections screamed for mercy rushing to the edge of the glass but Snape muttered the spell without a second thought and repaired the cracks so that he could no longer see in or hear their tiny little voices ever again.
"Slimy sod. Look at the way he's smirking at us!" Lily cried gesturing rudely at Snape who could no longer see them, walk away from the mirror and undress for bed.
"Honestly, doesn't he even care that we can see him do all that?" James hissed turning his head away.
"I've had enough of this! SIXTEEN BLOODY AWFUL YEARS IN THIS GLASS PRISON WITH NO MEANS OF ENTERTAINMENT EXCEPT FOR WATCHING HIS UGLY SMELLY DUNGEON OFFICE ALL DAY AND NIGHT WITH HIM WALKING AROUND SCRATCHING HIS BALLS!!!!!!"
"Lily…"
"AND I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF YOUR BLOODY COMPANY TOO YOU AWFUL MAN!! LEAVE ME ALONE! I WANT TO SEE MY HARRY! I WANT TO LIVE LIKE A NORMAL PERSON AGAIN!!!!" She threw her fists against the glass and banged hard on it trying to catch Snape's attention to no avail.
Snape lay down in his bed and turned the light off, then fell asleep. James and lily were tired too so they curled up on their bed of…….dust and slept aswell.
The next day Snape awoke and shaved as he normally did, patted down his greasy hair because there was never any point in combing it and dressed in his sexy black robes as usual just in case any unexpected lady visitors arrived and needed to be shown around the school, including all secret corridors and rooms.
It was a sad reason but he stuck with it because he just couldn't think of any other reason and performed a few test-sneers and test-shouting-to-little-Neville-Longbottom-lookalikes. James and Lily woke up and were watching him; it was their only form of television and they both looked as depressed as children forced to watch the queen's speech on Christmas day when they could be opening more presents.
Snape spun fast so that his robes fanned out and delighted in the knowledge that he made the older seventh year girls swoon when he swept past them. Shame that he couldn't do anything with them, being as he was a teacher, but some of them were very attractive.
Damn. Oh well. Then he suddenly remembered about Lily and James yesterday in the mirror. Well he couldn't let them out could he? They might tell everyone what a vile man he was.
Snape walked over to the mirror and smashed it with a spell. Down there were the two reflections of Lily and James glaring up at him.
"Hmm, this mirror's a bit old. I think I'll have to throw it out." He said as if he hadn't even known they were there at all. He took the mirror off of the wall with Lily and James screaming in outrage at his idea that they'd be put out on the garbage heap, but on second thought Snape decided to just smash the thing up and have done with it.
It was a satisfying smash he felt, except that his glee didn't last long when suddenly the room was filled with blazing white light that seemed to reflect off every wall showing his surprised face.
Lily and James stood up from the remains of the mirror and cheered.
"Yippeeeeeeee!"
"Fantastic!"
"All he needed to do was completely smash the mirror and we were set free!" Snape's eyesight focussed back in and when he saw the two in normal adult size he yelped and leapt back behind his bed.
"Snape you slimy sod get your arse out here now!" Lily ran and jumped, fallen on top of the man and kicked him in the genitals causing James to 'whoop' in agreement and Snape to whimper in pain.
"Let's go see Harry dear."
"Yes okay, and on the way we'll tell Dumbledore and anyone else we meet just how much of a poof this stupid idiot is. Honestly, that is one guy who needs a f**k." And they left the room hand in hand, skipping along like Dorothy and the Scarecrow singing: 'we're off to see the wizard!'
Snape's reputation was ruined forever. McGonagall kicked his butt and sent him away to live at the bottom of the lake with the fishies.
THE BLOODY END
