Usual disclaimers apply.

SECRET SANTA WISH

"Oh Misao-chan will you hold on a moment?"

"Huh?" I turned around looking at Okon. She walked back into the kitchen waving for me to follow and got out a piece of writing paper and writing utensils. I looked at her confused and Okon spoke.

"I decided we should have a little family holiday known as Christmas Misao-chan. Only the household members in the Aoiya are invited because I want it to be just us. I was shopping in the markets and came across this lovely western man who began talking about 'Secret Santa's' anyway, I need you to write your name down."

"Secret Santa's?" I replied a little intrigued.

"Yes, you see everyone needs to write there names down and they each pick one out a name out of a jar, making sure not to let anyone know who they have picked and buy them a gift. It's sort of a guessing game because you just write the person's name on it and not yours. Sometime during next week we'll have the special dinner but before that happens you must place the gift inside the main room in the corner under the tree, hopefully when no one will see you." I nodded my head in understanding, wrote my name down and turned to leave when Okon spoke again.

"Will you take this to Aoshi-san? Tell him to write his name down." I nodded my head even though I was full of uncertainty. Would Aoshi-sama really go for this? He isn't one for celebrations. He isn't one for much at all these days. I sighed out loud leaving the Aoiya. Oh please let him be in the spirit of it somehow. I spoke inside my head.

* * * *

"You can come in Misao." I jolted from the doorway of the room I was standing in. Aoshi-sama was kneeling on the floor in his usual clothes he wore at the temple. Even though he was facing the doorway eyes closed with incense burning around him he could still make out that I was in the room. Well he is the okashira Misao. He has been for such a long time now. A voice spoke inside my head. He's the okashira. I sighed softly, lowering my eyes and frowned coming to terms that he'll always be the okashira no matter what. Funnily enough even though I tried my hardest he was always there and I knew the others loved me but he was a born leader after all. My eyes widened when he spoke again.

"What is the matter Misao?" I placed a smile on my face walking closer towards him and spoke trying to cover up my sadness.

"Nothing Aoshi-sama, I just came here to ask a favour of you." I kneeled on the floor a couple of feet away from him and watched his face lift up looking over at me but those beautiful and very secretive eyes were protected by his long bangs.

"A favour?" He had spoken in his usual emotionless voice. It was so rich and if he ever spoke more the others would notice it was deep and full of emotions. His tone was low; his ninja skills still within him. I nodded my head bringing out the paper and writing utensils and spoke once more.

"I just need you to write your name that's all." He sat emotionless in front of me and I bowed my head telling him what it was for knowing he wouldn't unless there was some sort of explanation.

"Okon said something about a Christmas dinner for the Aoiya members and you need to write down your name for Secret Santa's. You see everyone places thei-"

"I know what it's for. It is a mere childish game." I frowned at his cold words and fisted my hands on my knees and spoke once more.

"No it wasn't me Aoshi-sama. You may think me a child but I am not a child anymore. The game is not childish either! This is all in spirit of Christmas because Okon wants this and I know the others will be excited as well. Okon thought it would be nice to spend an evening in celebration with just the Oniwabanshuu members and no one else. I'm sorry I even bothered." I got up at that, turned around and headed for the door. Once I got back to the Aoiya I knew I would scream. He can be so frustrating I felt like I wanted to slap some sense into him. I reefed the door slightly open in my anger but faulted in my footsteps when I heard Aoshi-sama's low voice once more.

"Misao wait." I turned slightly around noticing he was behind me and placed out the piece of paper and writing tools waiting wordlessly for me to take them from him. I looked down noticing he had written his name and I smiled brightly up at him taking it.

"Arigatoo Aoshi-sama!" I finally answered and left the room closing the door silently behind me. I was skipping back to the Aoiya smiling happily not needing to scream anymore.

* * * *

"MISAO-CHAN DINNER." I walked downstairs and into the dining room nearly dying of a heart attack as Aoshi-sama was here as well. He was usually late, always wanting to eat in peace and yet didn't mind my company as I waited for him to finish his meal. It warmed my heart thinking he didn't mind that I was in the room with him. I moved to where I usually sat and listened to Shiro and Kuro talking. Out of the corner of my eye Aoshi-sama was sipping some tea quietly. Okon was moving around the table with a jar full of our names in it while Omasu placed some food on the table with Okina's help funnily enough.

"What happens if we pick out our own names?" Shiro questioned.

"You place it back in and draw out another one." Everyone including myself looked over at Aoshi-sama who had spoken this. It was as though we all imagined it as he was sipping on his tea as though he hadn't uttered a single word.

"Ah, that's exactly right Aoshi-san. Now remember you can't tell anyone who you picked or else it ruins the surprise of trying to guess." There were mumbles of agreements and I watched as Okon moved over to me letting me pick out a name and then the last one went to Aoshi-sama. I watched as he opened it up, scanning the name and placed it in the inside of his trench coat.

"Let's eat." Okina had spoken enthusiastically and everyone began passing dishes around. I sat silently watching everyone begin eating and talking about what they had done today and about this Christmas celebration we would be having next week.

"Misao?" I turned my head facing Aoshi-sama as he was just opposite me. I knew a light blush crossed my cheeks as he held the bowl of steamed vegetables waiting for me to take it from him. I smiled my thanks at him and took it from his hands beginning to fill my bowl up with food before the others devoured it.

* * * *

Morning had come pretty quickly and I raced downstairs and out the door making sure to leave a note saying I would be going into town. I had saved all the money I had during the year but now was the time to buy some presents. I picked Okon out of the jar and knew exactly what she was after. I know she and Omasu thought I only ever day dreamed about Aoshi-sama and never keeping my ears open about anything. I remember her talking about a certain kimono in a store in town and that's where I was headed. I constantly heard her moaning and groaning to Omasu about needing new kitchen knives so I'd get her some of those as well.

* * * *

I had been in town for at least a couple of hours running into Okina down here but he scurried off saying something about meeting some nice pretty ladies. I shook my head knowing that was a complete lie as he was down here shopping too. I already got Okon's gifts; pre wrapped as well and was lazily walking home. I haltered in my walking looking into a store I hadn't noticed before. There were some really nice things inside and I walked in looking around. I had plenty of money left over and knew I wouldn't leave unless I had bought something for Aoshi-sama as well. He wasn't my secret santa but I truly was saving up to buy him a gift and now this celebration just made it official. I finally found what I was looking for. I asked the storeowner a couple of questions and he came back over towards me after being in the back room of the store and handed me the gifts I chose. I paid him the amount it cost and a bit extra for his trouble and left walking home excitedly. I hope he'll like them. I silently thought inside my head.

* * * *

I raced upstairs to my room placing his gifts inside and walked back downstairs and into the dining room. No one was around and I quickly placed Okon's present under the tree and left to go back upstairs.

I closed my bedroom door and opened a box up with one of Aoshi-sama's gifts inside. I had been eyeing them for sometime at a different shop but they were most expensive. The shop I had found today had them on sale and it was the perfect opportunity to grab them. I lightly fingered the black waishatsu I had bought Aoshi-sama and placed the lid back on the box covering it up once more. I opened the other box, which was long and thin. Inside was a new sheath for his kodachi's. I had asked the owner if he was able to engrave it with a couple of words and that's why it took so long. I also asked the man to place a hole at the bottom just like Aoshi-sama's other sheath so he could fit his smaller kodachi in it as well. An engraving of a dragon was already on the dark wood but nothing was placed on the other side. The owner had now engraved the characters of the words 'forgiven leader' on the blank side. He also polished it up making it look nice and shiny too. I placed the lid back on and began thinking of a way to give it to Aoshi-sama.

* * * *

The week was flying by quickly and everytime I bought the parcels with me to the temple I made a silly excuse saying I was delivering them to people in town not having the courage to tell him they were his.

* * * *

Today Misao, today is the day you give it to him. NO EXCUSES! I spoke determinedly inside my head. I was sitting down with the parcels beside me preparing some tea for Aoshi-sama. Minutes of silence filled the entire room but it was broken by Aoshi-sama.

"Misao what is with the parcels? You have been carrying the same ones around all week." I looked at him with wide surprised eyes.

"I do pay attention Misao and you really are a bad liar." I smiled sheepishly at him and he spoke again.

"Misao what are they for?" I slide them across the floor and placed them in front of him. I looked up seeing his lips slightly parted and he closed them finally realising I now had the courage to give them to him. He silently stared at me and I spoke.

"You're not my Secret Santa Aoshi-sama but I wanted to get you something in honor of this Christmas Okon keeps referring to." I knew a slight blush creeped over my cheeks and I silently observed as he bent his head down once more opening up the parcel with his waishatsu inside. I watched the rough tips of Aoshi-sama's right hand brush over the soft material of the black shirt and he placed the lid over it once more, turning his attention to the other box. I watched as he brought out the long sheath placing it in one hand while the other traced over the contours of the engraved dragon. I bit my lip as he turned it over looking at the two words inscribed. I clasped my hands together in my lap as his head lifted up and I knew those blue-green eyes burned into my ocean-blue ones even though they were hidden from view. I could feel the heat rise in my cheeks as I spoke my explanation.

"I thought it would be nice to see you at the celebration wearing something different, but you don't have to wear it if you don't want to. I won't be offended or anything." How am I going to explain the sheath? I spoke inside my head. I took a deep breath and spoke again.

"Your other sheath is worn out and rather scared, so to speak. I thought it would be nice for you to start off fresh, have something new, a clean slate maybe." I bowed my head slightly hoping he'd understand my hidden message as well. I knew my cheeks burned redder then usual as I felt the slight touch of Aoshi-sama's warm hand cover my smaller ones resting on my knees. He squeezed them and I turned my head up to look at him and relished the words that fell from his mouth.

"Thank you Misao." I placed on the brightest smile I could have ever shown and watched as he moved away grabbing his tea and sipping it quietly once more.

"I should be going Aoshi-sama, Okon needs my help." I watched as he nodded silently and I got up leaving the room. I made it to the front of the temple finally realising a light shower was falling. This just made the day even better then it already was. I began skipping through the rain lightly humming to myself feeling as though nothing could be better then what occurred between Aoshi-sama and myself today.

* * * *

It was now late afternoon as we all sat at the table, minus Aoshi-sama as it was time to open up the presents. Okon was handing them around and I finally received mine. I smiled happily as the others tore into their gifts speaking excitedly about what was inside. The only gift that was left under the tree was Aoshi-sama's. I got up forgetting about opening my own present and picked his up. I left the room undetected with my gift and his. I walked upstairs and into his old room but stood surprised as he was sitting on his futon with the window shutters drawn open.

"A-Aoshi-sama?" I spoke bewildered at his presence. I watched as he turned his head to look over his shoulder as his back was to me.

"I'm sorry I'll come back later…" I spoke absently while turning away.

"Is everyone downstairs Misao?" I nodded my head and walked over placing the gift in his lap and left the room without saying anything.

* * * *

I sat on my bed looking at the contents inside the box. My hands were shaking as I lifted out the small wooden box with my name carved into the lid with cherry blossoms around it. I opened it up noticing a dozen new kunais' where inside. I placed it beside me looking at the silver clip. It glittered in the candlelight and I placed it on the wooden box and pulled out the kimono. I had never been given a kimono before and I pulled it out noticing it was a deep sea blue and the under kimono was made of complete silk. Silver sakura blossoms and leaves where etched into the outer kimono and sparkled in the candlelight. I closed my eyes hugging it to me and opened my eyes gasping at the small card, which was placed at the bottom of the box: '…to start off fresh, have something new, a clean slate maybe.' Tears glistened in my eyes as my gifts where from the one person that always made my heart beat faster then normal. I stood up stripping out of my usual clothes and placed on the kimono.

Minutes passed as my face scrunched up in annoyance as I was still trying to tie the kimono up. I let out a sigh of relief when I finally did it up properly, having watched Okon and Omasu a dozen times. The others are going to die of a heart attack when they see this! I spoke inside myself. I grabbed my brush off the table and undid my usual braid letting my hair fall down my back and over my shoulders in soft wavy curls. I grabbed the clip pulling some hair away from my face even though loose parts still fell over my shoulders and framed my face.

* * * *

"OH MY GOD!" I screamed in return being totally unprepared for everyone yelling at me as though they were going to die of heart attacks. I stood in the room looking around at their surprised gazes. Okina walked over giving me a bear hug nearly breaking my small form and babbled happily about how I'd grown into a lovely young lady. Okon and Omasu giggled happily and jumped around at finally seeing me in a kimono and the others still stared stunned, as this wasn't the Misao-chan they knew.

"It's nearly time to eat Misao-chan, please drag Aoshi-san down." I smiled and reached the doorway but was haltered by Okon as she spoke once again.

"Thank you Misao-chan." I turned around hugging her briefly and walked slowly upstairs still not used to the kimono. I noticed Aoshi-sama's door was open and I looked inside seeing him standing at the table tracing his fingers over what looked like his gift. I took a deep breath hoping my blush was down to a minimum as he was very handsome bathed in candlelight. I slowly walked inside and stood beside him looking down at the woodcarving. It was of the Aoiya with 'Sumai' up the top in the middle. The building and gardens, minus the backyard, where carved into the wood. 'Shinomori Aoshi' was placed just below the steps of the main door and under that was the carving of the stone wall surrounding the Aoiya. What got my attention more then anything was the small word carved into the wood just under the gate. It was the word 'kazoku'. It was so beautifully down and I know this would have effected Aoshi-sama deeply. He didn't think he had the right to be apart of the Aoiya any longer but this was a sign that all was forgiven and he was family as he always has been. It was just like the two words written on his sheath. We all secretly hoped he'd understand that his mistakes should be left in the past and that it was time to move on.

"It's beautiful Aoshi-sama…from Okina I'd imagine." I spoke softly to him still looking down at the woodcarving, fearing if I starred up at him any longer I'd faint at how beautiful he looked.

"Yes, but so is this…" My eyes widened looking up at him as his fingers softly caressed my now reddened cheeks. My mouth parted but I was unable to say anything more as Aoshi-sama walked past me and obviously downstairs to eat as I could smell the aromas of the food.

* * * *

Hours passed, as everyone seemed to be in celebration mode. I couldn't stop thinking about what Aoshi-sama had said upstairs. I scanned the room noticing he was no where in sight and ascended the stairs once more. I walked into his room noticing the window still open and the candle still alight while flickering in the slight breeze. I walked inside and over to the window looking out into the moonlit backyard. I gasp happily seeing the first lots of snow begin to fall. I reached my hand out wanting to touch it and out of the corner of my eye I see a lone figure walking. I stopped what I was doing knowing exactly who it was. He wore his long trench coat covering himself up from the cold and sat down on one of the bench seats draping his arms over the back as though he owned it. I smiled looking over at him and was slightly stunned when his face seemed to turn my way as though he knew I was around and watching over him. I slowly backed away from the window and walked quickly, but quietly down the stairs, placed on some slippers and walked out into the back yard. I made my way over to the bench seat standing behind him. His hair blew around slightly ruffling it up but it glowed in the moonlight. It looked like fine silk and I wanted to touch it but dare not. This was of course Aoshi-sama, someone who loathed physical contact, any type of contact for that matter.

"What is it Misao?" I frowned slightly at his usual tone of voice and spoke what was running around in my mind.

"Why can't you at least be semi-happy for once Aoshi-sama. It's not going to kill you or ruin the so called reputation you have earned as a fearless leader and ninja who doesn't show any weakness. Why can't you show SOMETHING for once!" I turned abruptly around and began walking off. My frustration was back again.

"Misao please stop." I haltered hearing his deep voice full of emotion, more like uncertainty. My hands shook nervously and I waited for his next words but never faced him.

"Don't go…please don't go…" I turned around hearing the slight whisper and found him standing up. The wind blew his long bangs away from his eyes. My lips parted as they sparkled full of life and emotions. I trailed my eyes down his chest and over to his right gloved hand, which was held out beckoning me to come back over to him. Seconds later my feet began walking on their own accord but I never took my eyes off of his. I walked around the bench to stand a couple of feet in front of him and gasped as I realised he was wearing the waishatsu I bought him. I reached my hand out but quickly dropped it not having any sort of permission to touch him. I watched as he sat down once more and patted the space beside him. I sat down a little nervously and looked up at him to see he was looking out into the yard. His face was soft, no tension in it like at the temple. I bit my lip dreading if what I did would be bad for me. Dear god, please don't let him push me away anymore. I spoke inside my head. I leaned closer; closing my eyes for a brief moment as my lips came in contact with his slightly chilled cheek from the night air. I pulled back rather quickly as I watched his head turn and his gaze focused on my eyes and I spoke.

"M-Merry Christmas…Aoshi…" I spoke in a slight whisper and bit my lip hoping he didn't mind me calling him that. I watched with wide eyes as his right hand reached out and his soft gloved fingers brushed lightly against my cheek.

"You called me Aoshi." I smiled as he didn't mind one bit. I gasped softly in surprise as his arm circled over my shoulders, holding his coat open and bringing me closer to his warmth. I scooted over more leaning my head on his shoulder and cast my gaze over to his arm that draped slightly over my shoulders holding me close giving me some of his warmth. I smiled happily closing my eyes for a brief moment and opened them up and noticed Aoshi's shirt was slightly parted open. I could see a faint scar etched into his skin just where his heart lay underneath. Without even thinking about anything I placed my hand over the scar inside his shirt. I received a surprised gasp coming from Aoshi's throat at feeling the cold touch of my hand against his warm skin. I began pulling it out but was stopped as his left hand was placed over mine moving it back over to his heart. I smiled curling up closer to him, my legs draping over his right one and caught in between his lower thighs by his left leg trapping them there. I sighed contently and stared into the yard in front of us watching the snow fall onto the grass, trees, and flowers and into the pond.

"Aoshi it's so beautiful…" I spoke looking in awe at the yard slowly turning a glistening white.

"Shhh, just watch this with me." I closed my eyes feeling his hot breath trickle down my cold ear and neck. My left arm snaked around his lower waist, making sure he was unable to leave my embrace. I felt the slight pressure of his head leaning over mine, the tips of his long bangs brushing the side of my face. I was right at how soft they were. I sighed out loud once more closing my eyes in relaxation and happiness.

* * * *

I groaned awake and rolled over bumping into something. I opened my eyes blinking at the black shirt covered back. My eyes widened when a slightly sleepy Aoshi turned over looking at me.

"You fell asleep." I looked into those eyes and knew what was held there even if he tried to hide it from me. Fear that I was going to hate him for staying here with me. Yeah right, Aoshi-sama's in MY bed; no way will I hate him for that! I spoke inside my head. I smiled over at him and scooted closer wrapping my right arm around him holding him close to me and placed my head against his beating heart. His body stiffened for a few seconds in unease, not knowing the filling of someone being so close, but soon relaxed. My heartbeat grew faster against his chest as his left arm wrapped around me holding me close and his left leg draped over mine pulling me closer to him. That's when I felt the silk of the under kimono rub against my back. I pressed my hands against Aoshi's chest and pulled away and spoke looking up at him.

"Why am I only wearing this?" Those eyes gazed around the room but never on me.

"It was snowing Misao." I gasped as he rolled over leaning over me. He was heavier then myself, but it felt right, so right to have him above me. I slightly shook in nervousness as he truly was the stronger one and he did have the upper hand.

"Besides…this does look VERY nice on you Misao, much better then the outer kimono." A not so unpleasant shiver raced up my spine as Aoshi's finger brushed my collarbones. I felt the heat rise in to my cheeks looking up into his sparkling blue-green eyes.

"I never did give you my real present Misao." I parted my lips to speak but was unable to as his lips pressed softly against mine. I wrapped my shaky hands around his shoulder wanting him closer and kissed him back. He returned the kiss passionately, his full body leaning over mine letting me feel the contours of his muscled body against my heated one. A small sob/moan escaped my throat at this feeling of us finally being together like this. I opened my eyes to see Aoshi looking down at me as he had stopped so we could regain our breaths. I bit my lip to stop it from trembling and watched as Aoshi turned over onto his back taking me with him as I was now looking down at him, my body pressed tightly to his now, so he could feel all my curves.

"I'm sorry Misao…so sor-" He was unable to continue as I placed my lips against his once more. I lifted up looking into his blue-green eyes and spoke once more as he wiped my tears away.

"Shhh, it doesn't matter, I've got what I have always wanted and dreamed about my entire life." I watched a confused expression run over Aoshi's facial features for a few seconds and I spoke placing my hand over his heart and bent my head brushing my lips lightly over his.

"This…" I kissed him once more, loving the feel of his dry but soft lips against mine. A sigh left my throat as I placed my head down onto his chest and closed my eyes. Aoshi's arms enveloped me and I snuggled in closer sighing happily once more. This is the best place to be, wrapped in my Aoshi's arms feeling his warmth surround me as he protects me from the cold weather blowing outside.

"Merry Christmas Misao-mine." A bright smile spreads over my face as I silently blessed Okon for deciding to have a Christmas celebration.

THE END

Glossary:

Okashira - Leader

Waishatsu - Man's shirt

Sumai - Home

Kazoku - Family