Dear Lucas
My mind needed a break from Fallen Idol, because it's about to get interesting. Now, I'm not really of the opinion that Cybersix is dead, but this doesn't work any other way. So I decided to write another first person narrative, and have it in the form of a letter to Lucas (after episode 13) so without further ado, meine freunds, here it is!
Dear Lucas,
I promised myself that this wouldn't be a heartfelt farewell, because I have never been nor will I ever be good at that sort of thing. I promised that I wouldn't say if you're reading this, I'm probably dead. But I also promised that I'd tell you the truth. And so it looks like I've broken a promise or two.
I'm nervous. I shouldn't be, because I may never see you again (it hurts to write these words), but I am. Every minute I spent with you is a lie, because every second of those minutes has been matched in daylight. I never set foot in a café, and yet, we talked there for hours somedays. Your poetry-loving, romantic friend Adrian Seidelman is myself. I have been hiding myself in a dead boy's image since childhood.
You see now why I couldn't tell you what my connection with Cybersix was. I was afraid that you would shun me, keep me out of your life forever. I couldn't bear that, and an argument between friends is always smoothed over. So I avoided telling you, at least until the Isle of Doom showed up. I knew I'd have to either tell you now , or never, but my senses conflicted. I could not tell you, and your kiss only confused me more.
I needed to confess myself to you, or I would have died of guilt before ever reaching Von Reichter (as I plan to do very shortly). By the time you find this letter, you'll have seen the aftermath of my confrontation with the past. I may be dead now, or maybe I will see you tonight.
...I can't think of the words I need to say. Imagine, me, the English teacher, unable to write her own letter. It's almost amusing, isn't it? Ah. Amusement; yes, thank you for that. Without you, my sense of humor wouldn't ever have shown. Julian too. You remember the little urchin I gave my wallet to? That's Julian. He lives in a boat down by the docks; please tell him goodbye for me. Lori too. Did she tell you, dear Lucas, who I was? Thank her for me, and give her my regards about the test she failed. Things being as they are now, I wish I could have given every one of my students an A.
There's my twisted humor again. Lucas, I'm so sorry for keeping myself away from you. Only now, when I know it's too late, do I realize that all along I needed you. I wish I could explain everything to you, but there's no time now. Data 7 will be impatient for me, and I can't delay this any longer. I must protect this city, and you.
I wish I could write everything that I feel for you; I wish I could say it while looking into your eyes, but that can't happen now. My bounty is as boundless as the sea, the more I give to thee, the more I have, for both are infinite. I'm sure you recognize that line. And I'm sorry, dear Lucas, for everything. Farewell.
I love you.
-Cybersix
