Chances To Be Given
Chapter 3
Disclaimer: You know what I'm going to say. Sailor Moon is not mine. *YES! IT IS, HAHAHA* Jus joking. No it isn't. The characters belong to their wonderful and smart owners!!
Enjoy!
Chances To Be Given
Chapter 3
8:30 AM: Serena's Dream, Serena's Past
"What's going on here?" I said, trying to look inside the door behind Amy.
"Serena…" Amy began to say…pushing me away from the door. "Look, nothing's going on…um…I'm kind of busy right now…want to come back later?"
"What?! You want me to go away? What are you doing in there? And who's in there with you?" I pushed my way past her and ran inside her apartment before she could grab hold of me.
"Serena!" I heard her protest behind me.
"Oh my God!" My hear felt like a drowning girl, helpless from the truth that if no one came to save her, she would die. It was hard to breathe, and it was as if, I was there to watch my heart crack into pieces as I caught sight of MY Darien…kissing Raye once more before…before what? Before I was allowed inside?
"Serena…it's not what you think." Darien began, dropping Raye on the ground and running towards me.
"Stay away from me! All of you!!" I turned to Amy before I started to stalk away. "And you, Amy, why?"
"Serena, listen to Darien, it's not what you think…" Amy began, her face full of distress.
"And what am I thinking?" I interrupted her.
"Darien is not in love with Raye."
"Of course not, Meatball Head, so before your imagination runs off, why don't you just listen to us?" Raye chipped in, brushing herself off and walking towards me. She had this calm look on her face but still panic in her eyes.
"And what exactly was going on, Raye? What?! Was I imagining that you were kissing MY Darien? That you two were passionately holding each other? That you're lips were passionately…" Tears started rolling down my cheeks. "What, Raye, were my eyes deceiving me again?"
"Serena…" Darien's arm extended towards me…but I left them, before I heard what I didn't want to hear…that Darien had finally given in to Raye.
"Serena! Come back here!"
The scenery changed, I found myself in the bus stop sitting beside Mina.
"Serena, here you are. What's going on? Amy called me and said you had run off. What's wrong?" Mina wrapped her strong arms around me, squeezing my shoulders and brushing my hair. I leaned against her for support and comfort. I felt so lifeless and tired.
"Did you know too, Mina?" I asked her.
"Know what?"
"About…Darien and Raye?"
"Well, of...course I did, Serena, it's hard not to when you had something to do with it." And for the second time, my heart exploded into pieces. I jumped away from her and looked at her as if the touch of her skin burnt mine.
"What? You too, Mina, you too?"
"Serena…what's going on here? Serena!! Come back here!!"
Again the scenery changed, this time I found myself in the park, sitting under a tree for protection from the rain. I was cold. I was crying. I was alone, lonelier that I had ever felt before. My friends had abandoned me, my boyfriend kissed another girl and they all knew about it but me.
"Hey, Meatball Head, what are you doing outside in this weather?"
"Lita?"
"Of course, what, have you forgotten me all ready?"
"No…Oh, Lita, why has everyone gone against me? Why didn't anyone tell me that Darien didn't love me anymore?"
"What are you talking about? Of course, Darien still loves you! Where did you get that idea?"
"I saw them, Lita…Darien and Raye…kissing…hugging…"
"Oh, that…"
"That?" Lita sat beside me, her hands in her jacket pockets.
"Look, Serena…Darien will explain everything to you ok?"
"Explain what?! That he doesn't love me anymore…that…*sob*"
"No…Serena, listen…Darien will always love you, and if you just listen to their reasons, you'll see how stupid you're being."
"Stupid?!! I'm not stupid! Nor am I such a klutz that I spoil everything for everyone!" I jumped up in anger and began running again. And once more, I found myself in a different place. Except darkness cannot be counted as a place.
(Serena's POV)
9:05 AM
I woke up at the sound of a bird singing softly outside the bedroom window. A bird…I opened my eyes a crack to see if Alec was still here, but he wasn't. My eyes darted up to look upon the bird. A robin…a beautiful robin was perched on a little branch sticking close to the window.
"What are you doing here, Mr. Robin?" I croaked. My voice breaking and sounding so…used up.
As if to answer, he began to sing again and I smiled.
"That's true…why shouldn't you be here?" I sat up slowly, my movements almost automatic. And then I felt it, the pain in my arms and in my shoulders. I lifted my sleeve up to see if there were any bruises. And I was right. Alec's hands was like printed on my skin…the bruises formed a resemblance to his to fingers, his palm…his hands.
"Oh God." The previous night played again over in my head.
The previous night:
"Alec…" After I had cried in the bedroom, I had decided to look for my husband. I found him outside on the balcony smoking a cigarette, his face red and his eyes swollen from crying. I slid open the balcony doors and stepped outside hugging myself tightly at the cold I felt.
"Smoking is bad for you, you know that?" I think I startled him. His hands shook and his cigarettes fell from his fingers, descending down pass the other balconies below us.
"Serena, I…" He began, turning towards me.
"Shh…" I didn't want to hear another apology from him so instead I wrapped my arms around his waist and buried my face in his chest. He stroked my hair and hugged me back, strange really.
"It's cold out here, you want to go back inside?" He asked me.
"No, I like the air, it's refreshing."
"Serena, listen…"
"Please don't, Alec. I don't want any explanations. You were worried, it was my fault, I should've left a note or called to tell you where I was." I expected him to retort, but instead I only felt him nod. I flinched.
"We really better go back inside, you should sleep, so should I. We both got work tomorrow, right?"
"Right, you start earlier though."
"What time will you be home tomorrow?"
"I don't know yet, it really depends on how many appointments Dr. Heero has."
"Dr. Heero?"
"I'm going to be his new assistant. His assistant quit or something and he didn't want to bother his daughter anymore so…"
"Right, come on then." I didn't protest when he led me back inside, still holding onto me and me onto him. He laid me down on my bed and tucked me in. Then kissed me on the forehead and said good night. He undressed and changed, then turned out the lights.
"Good night," I said after.
"Work?! Oh darn it, I'm going to be late!!!" I remembered as I glimpsed at the time.
(Third person POV)
The day passed by quickly as appointments after appointments came for Dr. Heero. Serena was busy on her first day…well second. Dr. Heero was too, but both of them had managed.
"Well, that was progress. I thought we would be here until late, but I guess not. Only 9 and we're all done for today, is that right?" Dr. Heero said to Serena as he came out of his office and directed their last patients out of the doors.
"Yes, sir, that's right."
"Sir? You know, Serena, Derek is fine."
"Right, sorry."
"No apologies needed." He gave a small chuckle and took off his hospital coat. "You getting a ride home tonight?"
"Um, no…I think I'll just catch the bus again."
"Nonsense, how about I give you a ride? It's what a gentleman should do."
"I think I would rather not intrude. Besides, it is a beautiful night…I want to go for a little walk right after that bus ride." Dr. Heero looked at his new assistant with respect. He had only just hired her and all ready, he couldn't help but treat her like one of his daughters.
"Well, I suppose that's all right for tonight. Go on, then, I'll lock up here."
"Arigatoo, good night." Serena gave a bow and in return so did he. Then she left and began her walk towards the bus stop.
The streets were empty and quiet. The neighborhood was a nice one, with plenty of trees and plenty of star-filled sky. She took a seat on the bench and sighed. She tilted her head back and stared up at the sky.
"Starlight, star bright, first star I see tonight, I wish I may, I wish I might, have my wish come true tonight." Her eyes focused on the first star she had seen. "I wish, with all my heart, to find my way back to happiness," She whispered.
"A beautiful but sad wish."
"Huh?" Serena jerked her head down, suddenly realizing that she was not alone anymore. She looked at the person beside her, wishing the shadows did not hide the newcomer's face.
"How have you been, Serena? You really don't sound so happy." And suddenly it hit her. That voice was familiar and the person sitting beside her, with short hair and a melodic voice was one of her past friends.
"Amy…what are you doing here?" She asked, shocked, happy but sad at the same time.
"I live around here, Serena, or have you forgotten that? I was out for a walk and then…I saw you, sitting here all alone and wishing for…happiness. I didn't mean to scare you. I just…had to talk to you." Amy's head bowed down, her eyes still fixed at the figure sitting beside her. At the same time, Serena's eyes fell from her friend's shadows and down to her hands, which were folded around each other.
"Why did you run away when we saw you at the Arcade, Serena?" Amy then asked, after such a long silence. A car passed by and her face was finally revealed, but only to be hidden again in the dark.
"I don't know, Amy. I just…didn't want to be right there and then. I didn't want to talk to anybody, you know. A lot of things have been happening and facing you guys, I couldn't do it yet." Amy understood, but she almost cried as she stared at the petite form of her friend. Her face sunken in, her lips quivering with fear, her eyes full of uncertainty and sadness. She didn't see a confident and smiling Serena, the Serena she had grown up with and shared so many secrets with.
"We've missed you, Serena, all of us." There were again a few moments of silence, the two of them just sitting there and looking ahead of them. Neither one knew what to say next and neither one of them wanted to interrupt the peaceful silence.
"Why, Amy?" Serena's whisper broke in the air. Amy could hardly hear what her friend had said, but she did as the wind blew it her way.
"Why?" Amy's face crinkled as she frowned, trying to understand what her friend meant by what she said.
"Why did everyone leave me?" It took only a second for Amy to understand what Serena was talking about. But she took a minute to answer, another car passing by and revealing her thoughtful face once again.
"We never left you, Serena, we were always there. We just didn't know what to say to you. You wouldn't let us explain, you'd always push us away."
"Me? I did?"
"You wouldn't listen to reason…you wouldn't listen to the truth."
"Because I knew the truth, I knew the whole of it." Amy lowered her voice to a whisper, but still strong enough for Serena to hear. She didn't want to hurt Serena even more, but she didn't want to lie either.
"That's just it, Serena, you didn't know any of it." Serena was stunned, yet somehow felt a truth from it. Her vision started to blur as tears started to form at the rim of her eyes. Another car passed by.
"All I wanted was to be happy, Amy, to understand what I saw. All I wanted was reassurance that…that I wasn't alone, but, all of you…you left me." Serena almost breathed the last three words, Amy almost missing what she said.
Another car passed by.
"We never did, Serena. We were there, waiting for you to come to us, we were always waiting."
"But why, why did you wait?"
"We thought…it would be for the best for you to calm down a little, we thought it was the right thing to do, but it wasn't was it? We shouldn't have waited…"
"No…"
And another car passed by.
"I'm so sorry, Serena, I never meant…we never meant to hurt you at all. That was the last thing any of us wanted to do. You have to believe me." Amy inched closer to her friend and let her arms pull her friend towards her. She held onto her, wanting only forgiveness, because ever since they had heard what was going to happen, Amy felt the guiltiest of all. Because she allowed them to do it, she allowed Serena to see what she shouldn't have seen.
"Will you tell me why, why I saw what I did?"
"It was an experiment," Amy replied.
"Experiment?" Serena pulled back a little, seeming like a child looking at her mother for some explanation.
"Yes, it was for the play."
"Play?"
"Yes, the Beauty and the Beast play Darien and Raye were in. We didn't tell you about it, because Darien didn't really want to tell you that he would be the prince and kissing another girl, and that that girl was Raye. He didn't want you to feel jealous or…he didn't…I don't know what he didn't or did want but…he just made us promise not to tell you, he said he would."
"Oh," Minutes passed again with silence.
Another car passed by.
"That's stupid, I'm miserable now because…I mean…" Serena tried to hide the fact that she had just said she was miserable. But she knew Amy would not fall for it.
"Miserable, Serena? Why?" Amy asked.
"Oh Amy…If I told you, you'd worry, you'd be as unhappy as me and that would be last thing I would want to do, to burden other people of my problems. Look at me, crying like I was a teenager again." Serena wiped away her tears and pulled back from her friend's embrace. "I hate crying, you know. I hated it then, and I hate it even more now."
"But crying helps, Serena. When no one is there to listen, you're tears will be there as a substitute. They lessen the feeling of loneliness…they make you realize what it is you want and what it is you have to do to make things right again so that you will never have to cry again."
"Hmm, just like you to say something like that. You haven't changed at all."
"But I have, Serena. Everyone has, ever since you left our world." The bus finally arrived.
"Serena…I don't know if you'll want to…but, would you talk to the others again? Will you meet them at the Arcade again?" Serena did not turn to look at her friend as she gave her answer.
"I can only do so much right now, Amy. And I can only face so many memories."
"I understand."
"I'm glad one of us does,"
Serena took a seat at the back. The bus was quite empty and only another 2 passengers were on it. A couple that leaned against each other and soothed each other's fears. She envied them. She wished them happiness.
'Why did I have to be so stubborn? Why did I have to be so stupid! I deserved it! Everything that happened to me, I deserved it. Every pain I felt, every tear I shed, and cry I let out, I deserved it. If I hadn't been so stupid! If only I had heard what they were trying to say, everything would be so different. I wouldn't be on this stupid bus, dying because I made a stupid mistake of being deaf!! Dear God, why did you let me be so…so…STUBBORN!!'
9:30 PM: Apartment
She turned the key slowly, making sure that if Alec were sleeping that she would not distract him. But she frowned when she found the place dark and unchanged from the way she had left it this morning. She saw neither Alec's shoes nor his socks. She saw the dinner in the fridge untouched. And she saw nobody lying on the bed besides hers.
"Well, I guess he must be working late." She told herself, taking a shower and changing her clothes. She glimpsed at the microwave telling her the time. Only 10:30, he would surely be home soon. She wrapped a blanket around her and stepped outside on the balcony. The suite beside hers was dark, but another window beside the balcony was lit. She sat down and looked across at the balcony, a sense of familiarity growing in her stomach. The two balconies were almost touching. Behind her, past their bedroom window, another balcony stood, loud music coming from it once more. She shook her head and looked again at the balcony besides hers.
"I wonder who lives there." The lights suddenly turned on as she heard the doorbell ring.
"COMING! Hold your horses," A man's voice exclaimed. Another familiar feeling washed over the other one.
"Hey, what are you guys doing here?"
"We've got news, right A (loud blaring of music)" Who? Oh, damn music!!
"What news?"
"About (loud electric guitar playing blurs out the words)"
"Oh come on, how is a girl suppose to eavesdrop if she can't even hear a thing!" she whispered to herself, occasionally shooting a bad look behind her.
"What did she say to you?"
"She's unhappy (solo drumming)"
"This isn't any of my business anymore, she's married for God's sake."
"Not because she wanted to be, you fool!" Serena heard.
"There's at least 4 other girls in there with him. Sisters? Cousins? Friends? Girlfriends?" the last suggestion made her laugh. "As if all his girlfriends would visit him at the same time."
"You're mad at her!! It's not her fault she didn't know about what was going on! It wasn't her fault that her heart was broken when it shouldn't have been. Why…I ought to kill you for saying you don't care Da (words of foul language)"
"Turn that damn music down!!" She screamed, and then covering her mouth, hoping no one on the other side had heard her.
"What was that?" The man said.
"What? Oh, don't you change the subject! You can't just abandon her again."
"Again? I never abandoned her at all! She wouldn't trust me! She abandoned me! She married that fool of a boy who call himself a man!"
"And she, was forced to do it! You understand! So don't go blaming everything on her!"
"Stop it, all of you! I want to be left alone, I don't know why you even bother to tell me news about her."
"Because we know the truth, Chi (TOOT!!)"
"What truth?"
"That you love her, and you always have and you always will!" (Loud swearing words being sang)
"Damn it!! That's it, I'm going over there and telling them to turn the damn music down!" Serena screamed, very annoyed that she didn't catch any names at all! Was it a coincidence or what? (Of course it is)
(Darien's POV)
"Because we know the truth, Chiba!"
"What truth?"
"That you love her, and you always have and you always will!"
I didn't deny their truth; I didn't ignore it either, because it was the truth. My heart ached for her so badly, and when they told me that she was unhappy, my heart only wanted to find her and make her smile again.
"You know we're right, Darien, so why are you doing this to yourself?" Lita proclaimed, her anger lessening at the sight of my downcast eyes.
"I have a huge exam tomorrow, I'd appreciate it if you girls leave,"
"What?! You selfish fool! You call yourself a man?!"
"Lita…we told him what we thought he'd like to hear. We should go, we're not wanted anymore." Raye grabbed Lita's arms and pulled her with them outside the door. I followed them and held the door open until I saw them get on the elevator. The door beside mine opened, but I didn't really want to meet the new tenants right now, I was in the most depressing mood.
(Serena, third person POV)
She opened the door, blanket still wrapped around her and walked steadily towards the loud music. She pressed the buzzer, one right after the other, uncaring if she was disturbing somebody. An old man of 60 opened the door and greeted her with a frown on his face. Serena didn't know what to do. She had expected a young man to be listening to that kind of music but…an old man? It made her shiver.
"YES?" He said, his hands going to his jacket pocket.
"Hi, we live next door. And, well, I'm just trying to get some rest you see and…well, I would really appreciate it if you…well…you know, it's a beautiful night to enjoy the peace…and well…I was wondering if you could turn down the music, just a tiny bit?"
"Is it loud again? JOSHUA, TURN DOWN THAT RACKET!!" Joshua? Serena mouthed. Instantly the music was only a little loud.
"Thank you,"
"Sorry if our grandson was bothering you, he often does that. And well, it's hard for us to tell, we're half deaf you see."
"That's all right, doomo arigatoo." Serena nodded her head, and then said good night, waving a little then stepping back inside the apartment building. She glimpsed again at the time. 11:30. Where are you, Alec?
"Stop waiting around, Serena. You have work tomorrow, if he gets mad at you for not waiting up for him, then it's his problem…or not…but you're tired, go to sleep." She was unsure if she should…should she? Would he…but no, he wouldn't. She'd take the risk and sleep.
2 AM: Apartment still. :O)
In the middle of the night she heard rustling outside the door. She froze and hoped that it wasn't a burglar or anything like that. She opened her eyes in the darkness and saw a form hanging over her. Instantly she closed her eyes, wishing it would go away.
"It's only me, Serena," Serena was relieved, but she did not make a move to tell him she was actually awake, because she knew that he was only taking a guess. After a few minutes, she opened her eyes and saw Alec's sleeping form. She looked at the alarm clock by his bed. It was 2 A.M.
'You couldn't have been working that long, Alec…where were you?' She wouldn't bother him about it tomorrow. She didn't really want to know, because not knowing the truth was so much better…for her anyway. But she fell back to sleep.
(Darien's POV again)
"You can't deny it, Darien Chiba. You're still in love with that girl, and you always will be? Why were you so scared that she would be mad at you for playing a damn prince! The play didn't even turn out good! Why didn't you trust her to understand?? Why did you let Raye practice that kiss with you?!! Why…?" I lay in bed, the picture of Serena clearly painted in my closed eyelids. It was no use trying to pretend that I didn't miss her. It was no use trying to pretend that it was my entire fault.
"Too late now, Chiba. You ruined your chance, get over it." I glanced at the small alarm clock on my bedside table. 3 o'clock in the morning. I couldn't sleep. I was wide-awake.
"Give me another chance, Serena, would you? I don't care if you're married, I just want to be with you!"
--end chapter 3--
that's it for now for ch. 3. stay tuned for 4 next wk!! or something like that.
lil_poetic_gal@hotmail.com
Chapter 3
Disclaimer: You know what I'm going to say. Sailor Moon is not mine. *YES! IT IS, HAHAHA* Jus joking. No it isn't. The characters belong to their wonderful and smart owners!!
Enjoy!
Chances To Be Given
Chapter 3
8:30 AM: Serena's Dream, Serena's Past
"What's going on here?" I said, trying to look inside the door behind Amy.
"Serena…" Amy began to say…pushing me away from the door. "Look, nothing's going on…um…I'm kind of busy right now…want to come back later?"
"What?! You want me to go away? What are you doing in there? And who's in there with you?" I pushed my way past her and ran inside her apartment before she could grab hold of me.
"Serena!" I heard her protest behind me.
"Oh my God!" My hear felt like a drowning girl, helpless from the truth that if no one came to save her, she would die. It was hard to breathe, and it was as if, I was there to watch my heart crack into pieces as I caught sight of MY Darien…kissing Raye once more before…before what? Before I was allowed inside?
"Serena…it's not what you think." Darien began, dropping Raye on the ground and running towards me.
"Stay away from me! All of you!!" I turned to Amy before I started to stalk away. "And you, Amy, why?"
"Serena, listen to Darien, it's not what you think…" Amy began, her face full of distress.
"And what am I thinking?" I interrupted her.
"Darien is not in love with Raye."
"Of course not, Meatball Head, so before your imagination runs off, why don't you just listen to us?" Raye chipped in, brushing herself off and walking towards me. She had this calm look on her face but still panic in her eyes.
"And what exactly was going on, Raye? What?! Was I imagining that you were kissing MY Darien? That you two were passionately holding each other? That you're lips were passionately…" Tears started rolling down my cheeks. "What, Raye, were my eyes deceiving me again?"
"Serena…" Darien's arm extended towards me…but I left them, before I heard what I didn't want to hear…that Darien had finally given in to Raye.
"Serena! Come back here!"
The scenery changed, I found myself in the bus stop sitting beside Mina.
"Serena, here you are. What's going on? Amy called me and said you had run off. What's wrong?" Mina wrapped her strong arms around me, squeezing my shoulders and brushing my hair. I leaned against her for support and comfort. I felt so lifeless and tired.
"Did you know too, Mina?" I asked her.
"Know what?"
"About…Darien and Raye?"
"Well, of...course I did, Serena, it's hard not to when you had something to do with it." And for the second time, my heart exploded into pieces. I jumped away from her and looked at her as if the touch of her skin burnt mine.
"What? You too, Mina, you too?"
"Serena…what's going on here? Serena!! Come back here!!"
Again the scenery changed, this time I found myself in the park, sitting under a tree for protection from the rain. I was cold. I was crying. I was alone, lonelier that I had ever felt before. My friends had abandoned me, my boyfriend kissed another girl and they all knew about it but me.
"Hey, Meatball Head, what are you doing outside in this weather?"
"Lita?"
"Of course, what, have you forgotten me all ready?"
"No…Oh, Lita, why has everyone gone against me? Why didn't anyone tell me that Darien didn't love me anymore?"
"What are you talking about? Of course, Darien still loves you! Where did you get that idea?"
"I saw them, Lita…Darien and Raye…kissing…hugging…"
"Oh, that…"
"That?" Lita sat beside me, her hands in her jacket pockets.
"Look, Serena…Darien will explain everything to you ok?"
"Explain what?! That he doesn't love me anymore…that…*sob*"
"No…Serena, listen…Darien will always love you, and if you just listen to their reasons, you'll see how stupid you're being."
"Stupid?!! I'm not stupid! Nor am I such a klutz that I spoil everything for everyone!" I jumped up in anger and began running again. And once more, I found myself in a different place. Except darkness cannot be counted as a place.
(Serena's POV)
9:05 AM
I woke up at the sound of a bird singing softly outside the bedroom window. A bird…I opened my eyes a crack to see if Alec was still here, but he wasn't. My eyes darted up to look upon the bird. A robin…a beautiful robin was perched on a little branch sticking close to the window.
"What are you doing here, Mr. Robin?" I croaked. My voice breaking and sounding so…used up.
As if to answer, he began to sing again and I smiled.
"That's true…why shouldn't you be here?" I sat up slowly, my movements almost automatic. And then I felt it, the pain in my arms and in my shoulders. I lifted my sleeve up to see if there were any bruises. And I was right. Alec's hands was like printed on my skin…the bruises formed a resemblance to his to fingers, his palm…his hands.
"Oh God." The previous night played again over in my head.
The previous night:
"Alec…" After I had cried in the bedroom, I had decided to look for my husband. I found him outside on the balcony smoking a cigarette, his face red and his eyes swollen from crying. I slid open the balcony doors and stepped outside hugging myself tightly at the cold I felt.
"Smoking is bad for you, you know that?" I think I startled him. His hands shook and his cigarettes fell from his fingers, descending down pass the other balconies below us.
"Serena, I…" He began, turning towards me.
"Shh…" I didn't want to hear another apology from him so instead I wrapped my arms around his waist and buried my face in his chest. He stroked my hair and hugged me back, strange really.
"It's cold out here, you want to go back inside?" He asked me.
"No, I like the air, it's refreshing."
"Serena, listen…"
"Please don't, Alec. I don't want any explanations. You were worried, it was my fault, I should've left a note or called to tell you where I was." I expected him to retort, but instead I only felt him nod. I flinched.
"We really better go back inside, you should sleep, so should I. We both got work tomorrow, right?"
"Right, you start earlier though."
"What time will you be home tomorrow?"
"I don't know yet, it really depends on how many appointments Dr. Heero has."
"Dr. Heero?"
"I'm going to be his new assistant. His assistant quit or something and he didn't want to bother his daughter anymore so…"
"Right, come on then." I didn't protest when he led me back inside, still holding onto me and me onto him. He laid me down on my bed and tucked me in. Then kissed me on the forehead and said good night. He undressed and changed, then turned out the lights.
"Good night," I said after.
"Work?! Oh darn it, I'm going to be late!!!" I remembered as I glimpsed at the time.
(Third person POV)
The day passed by quickly as appointments after appointments came for Dr. Heero. Serena was busy on her first day…well second. Dr. Heero was too, but both of them had managed.
"Well, that was progress. I thought we would be here until late, but I guess not. Only 9 and we're all done for today, is that right?" Dr. Heero said to Serena as he came out of his office and directed their last patients out of the doors.
"Yes, sir, that's right."
"Sir? You know, Serena, Derek is fine."
"Right, sorry."
"No apologies needed." He gave a small chuckle and took off his hospital coat. "You getting a ride home tonight?"
"Um, no…I think I'll just catch the bus again."
"Nonsense, how about I give you a ride? It's what a gentleman should do."
"I think I would rather not intrude. Besides, it is a beautiful night…I want to go for a little walk right after that bus ride." Dr. Heero looked at his new assistant with respect. He had only just hired her and all ready, he couldn't help but treat her like one of his daughters.
"Well, I suppose that's all right for tonight. Go on, then, I'll lock up here."
"Arigatoo, good night." Serena gave a bow and in return so did he. Then she left and began her walk towards the bus stop.
The streets were empty and quiet. The neighborhood was a nice one, with plenty of trees and plenty of star-filled sky. She took a seat on the bench and sighed. She tilted her head back and stared up at the sky.
"Starlight, star bright, first star I see tonight, I wish I may, I wish I might, have my wish come true tonight." Her eyes focused on the first star she had seen. "I wish, with all my heart, to find my way back to happiness," She whispered.
"A beautiful but sad wish."
"Huh?" Serena jerked her head down, suddenly realizing that she was not alone anymore. She looked at the person beside her, wishing the shadows did not hide the newcomer's face.
"How have you been, Serena? You really don't sound so happy." And suddenly it hit her. That voice was familiar and the person sitting beside her, with short hair and a melodic voice was one of her past friends.
"Amy…what are you doing here?" She asked, shocked, happy but sad at the same time.
"I live around here, Serena, or have you forgotten that? I was out for a walk and then…I saw you, sitting here all alone and wishing for…happiness. I didn't mean to scare you. I just…had to talk to you." Amy's head bowed down, her eyes still fixed at the figure sitting beside her. At the same time, Serena's eyes fell from her friend's shadows and down to her hands, which were folded around each other.
"Why did you run away when we saw you at the Arcade, Serena?" Amy then asked, after such a long silence. A car passed by and her face was finally revealed, but only to be hidden again in the dark.
"I don't know, Amy. I just…didn't want to be right there and then. I didn't want to talk to anybody, you know. A lot of things have been happening and facing you guys, I couldn't do it yet." Amy understood, but she almost cried as she stared at the petite form of her friend. Her face sunken in, her lips quivering with fear, her eyes full of uncertainty and sadness. She didn't see a confident and smiling Serena, the Serena she had grown up with and shared so many secrets with.
"We've missed you, Serena, all of us." There were again a few moments of silence, the two of them just sitting there and looking ahead of them. Neither one knew what to say next and neither one of them wanted to interrupt the peaceful silence.
"Why, Amy?" Serena's whisper broke in the air. Amy could hardly hear what her friend had said, but she did as the wind blew it her way.
"Why?" Amy's face crinkled as she frowned, trying to understand what her friend meant by what she said.
"Why did everyone leave me?" It took only a second for Amy to understand what Serena was talking about. But she took a minute to answer, another car passing by and revealing her thoughtful face once again.
"We never left you, Serena, we were always there. We just didn't know what to say to you. You wouldn't let us explain, you'd always push us away."
"Me? I did?"
"You wouldn't listen to reason…you wouldn't listen to the truth."
"Because I knew the truth, I knew the whole of it." Amy lowered her voice to a whisper, but still strong enough for Serena to hear. She didn't want to hurt Serena even more, but she didn't want to lie either.
"That's just it, Serena, you didn't know any of it." Serena was stunned, yet somehow felt a truth from it. Her vision started to blur as tears started to form at the rim of her eyes. Another car passed by.
"All I wanted was to be happy, Amy, to understand what I saw. All I wanted was reassurance that…that I wasn't alone, but, all of you…you left me." Serena almost breathed the last three words, Amy almost missing what she said.
Another car passed by.
"We never did, Serena. We were there, waiting for you to come to us, we were always waiting."
"But why, why did you wait?"
"We thought…it would be for the best for you to calm down a little, we thought it was the right thing to do, but it wasn't was it? We shouldn't have waited…"
"No…"
And another car passed by.
"I'm so sorry, Serena, I never meant…we never meant to hurt you at all. That was the last thing any of us wanted to do. You have to believe me." Amy inched closer to her friend and let her arms pull her friend towards her. She held onto her, wanting only forgiveness, because ever since they had heard what was going to happen, Amy felt the guiltiest of all. Because she allowed them to do it, she allowed Serena to see what she shouldn't have seen.
"Will you tell me why, why I saw what I did?"
"It was an experiment," Amy replied.
"Experiment?" Serena pulled back a little, seeming like a child looking at her mother for some explanation.
"Yes, it was for the play."
"Play?"
"Yes, the Beauty and the Beast play Darien and Raye were in. We didn't tell you about it, because Darien didn't really want to tell you that he would be the prince and kissing another girl, and that that girl was Raye. He didn't want you to feel jealous or…he didn't…I don't know what he didn't or did want but…he just made us promise not to tell you, he said he would."
"Oh," Minutes passed again with silence.
Another car passed by.
"That's stupid, I'm miserable now because…I mean…" Serena tried to hide the fact that she had just said she was miserable. But she knew Amy would not fall for it.
"Miserable, Serena? Why?" Amy asked.
"Oh Amy…If I told you, you'd worry, you'd be as unhappy as me and that would be last thing I would want to do, to burden other people of my problems. Look at me, crying like I was a teenager again." Serena wiped away her tears and pulled back from her friend's embrace. "I hate crying, you know. I hated it then, and I hate it even more now."
"But crying helps, Serena. When no one is there to listen, you're tears will be there as a substitute. They lessen the feeling of loneliness…they make you realize what it is you want and what it is you have to do to make things right again so that you will never have to cry again."
"Hmm, just like you to say something like that. You haven't changed at all."
"But I have, Serena. Everyone has, ever since you left our world." The bus finally arrived.
"Serena…I don't know if you'll want to…but, would you talk to the others again? Will you meet them at the Arcade again?" Serena did not turn to look at her friend as she gave her answer.
"I can only do so much right now, Amy. And I can only face so many memories."
"I understand."
"I'm glad one of us does,"
Serena took a seat at the back. The bus was quite empty and only another 2 passengers were on it. A couple that leaned against each other and soothed each other's fears. She envied them. She wished them happiness.
'Why did I have to be so stubborn? Why did I have to be so stupid! I deserved it! Everything that happened to me, I deserved it. Every pain I felt, every tear I shed, and cry I let out, I deserved it. If I hadn't been so stupid! If only I had heard what they were trying to say, everything would be so different. I wouldn't be on this stupid bus, dying because I made a stupid mistake of being deaf!! Dear God, why did you let me be so…so…STUBBORN!!'
9:30 PM: Apartment
She turned the key slowly, making sure that if Alec were sleeping that she would not distract him. But she frowned when she found the place dark and unchanged from the way she had left it this morning. She saw neither Alec's shoes nor his socks. She saw the dinner in the fridge untouched. And she saw nobody lying on the bed besides hers.
"Well, I guess he must be working late." She told herself, taking a shower and changing her clothes. She glimpsed at the microwave telling her the time. Only 10:30, he would surely be home soon. She wrapped a blanket around her and stepped outside on the balcony. The suite beside hers was dark, but another window beside the balcony was lit. She sat down and looked across at the balcony, a sense of familiarity growing in her stomach. The two balconies were almost touching. Behind her, past their bedroom window, another balcony stood, loud music coming from it once more. She shook her head and looked again at the balcony besides hers.
"I wonder who lives there." The lights suddenly turned on as she heard the doorbell ring.
"COMING! Hold your horses," A man's voice exclaimed. Another familiar feeling washed over the other one.
"Hey, what are you guys doing here?"
"We've got news, right A (loud blaring of music)" Who? Oh, damn music!!
"What news?"
"About (loud electric guitar playing blurs out the words)"
"Oh come on, how is a girl suppose to eavesdrop if she can't even hear a thing!" she whispered to herself, occasionally shooting a bad look behind her.
"What did she say to you?"
"She's unhappy (solo drumming)"
"This isn't any of my business anymore, she's married for God's sake."
"Not because she wanted to be, you fool!" Serena heard.
"There's at least 4 other girls in there with him. Sisters? Cousins? Friends? Girlfriends?" the last suggestion made her laugh. "As if all his girlfriends would visit him at the same time."
"You're mad at her!! It's not her fault she didn't know about what was going on! It wasn't her fault that her heart was broken when it shouldn't have been. Why…I ought to kill you for saying you don't care Da (words of foul language)"
"Turn that damn music down!!" She screamed, and then covering her mouth, hoping no one on the other side had heard her.
"What was that?" The man said.
"What? Oh, don't you change the subject! You can't just abandon her again."
"Again? I never abandoned her at all! She wouldn't trust me! She abandoned me! She married that fool of a boy who call himself a man!"
"And she, was forced to do it! You understand! So don't go blaming everything on her!"
"Stop it, all of you! I want to be left alone, I don't know why you even bother to tell me news about her."
"Because we know the truth, Chi (TOOT!!)"
"What truth?"
"That you love her, and you always have and you always will!" (Loud swearing words being sang)
"Damn it!! That's it, I'm going over there and telling them to turn the damn music down!" Serena screamed, very annoyed that she didn't catch any names at all! Was it a coincidence or what? (Of course it is)
(Darien's POV)
"Because we know the truth, Chiba!"
"What truth?"
"That you love her, and you always have and you always will!"
I didn't deny their truth; I didn't ignore it either, because it was the truth. My heart ached for her so badly, and when they told me that she was unhappy, my heart only wanted to find her and make her smile again.
"You know we're right, Darien, so why are you doing this to yourself?" Lita proclaimed, her anger lessening at the sight of my downcast eyes.
"I have a huge exam tomorrow, I'd appreciate it if you girls leave,"
"What?! You selfish fool! You call yourself a man?!"
"Lita…we told him what we thought he'd like to hear. We should go, we're not wanted anymore." Raye grabbed Lita's arms and pulled her with them outside the door. I followed them and held the door open until I saw them get on the elevator. The door beside mine opened, but I didn't really want to meet the new tenants right now, I was in the most depressing mood.
(Serena, third person POV)
She opened the door, blanket still wrapped around her and walked steadily towards the loud music. She pressed the buzzer, one right after the other, uncaring if she was disturbing somebody. An old man of 60 opened the door and greeted her with a frown on his face. Serena didn't know what to do. She had expected a young man to be listening to that kind of music but…an old man? It made her shiver.
"YES?" He said, his hands going to his jacket pocket.
"Hi, we live next door. And, well, I'm just trying to get some rest you see and…well, I would really appreciate it if you…well…you know, it's a beautiful night to enjoy the peace…and well…I was wondering if you could turn down the music, just a tiny bit?"
"Is it loud again? JOSHUA, TURN DOWN THAT RACKET!!" Joshua? Serena mouthed. Instantly the music was only a little loud.
"Thank you,"
"Sorry if our grandson was bothering you, he often does that. And well, it's hard for us to tell, we're half deaf you see."
"That's all right, doomo arigatoo." Serena nodded her head, and then said good night, waving a little then stepping back inside the apartment building. She glimpsed again at the time. 11:30. Where are you, Alec?
"Stop waiting around, Serena. You have work tomorrow, if he gets mad at you for not waiting up for him, then it's his problem…or not…but you're tired, go to sleep." She was unsure if she should…should she? Would he…but no, he wouldn't. She'd take the risk and sleep.
2 AM: Apartment still. :O)
In the middle of the night she heard rustling outside the door. She froze and hoped that it wasn't a burglar or anything like that. She opened her eyes in the darkness and saw a form hanging over her. Instantly she closed her eyes, wishing it would go away.
"It's only me, Serena," Serena was relieved, but she did not make a move to tell him she was actually awake, because she knew that he was only taking a guess. After a few minutes, she opened her eyes and saw Alec's sleeping form. She looked at the alarm clock by his bed. It was 2 A.M.
'You couldn't have been working that long, Alec…where were you?' She wouldn't bother him about it tomorrow. She didn't really want to know, because not knowing the truth was so much better…for her anyway. But she fell back to sleep.
(Darien's POV again)
"You can't deny it, Darien Chiba. You're still in love with that girl, and you always will be? Why were you so scared that she would be mad at you for playing a damn prince! The play didn't even turn out good! Why didn't you trust her to understand?? Why did you let Raye practice that kiss with you?!! Why…?" I lay in bed, the picture of Serena clearly painted in my closed eyelids. It was no use trying to pretend that I didn't miss her. It was no use trying to pretend that it was my entire fault.
"Too late now, Chiba. You ruined your chance, get over it." I glanced at the small alarm clock on my bedside table. 3 o'clock in the morning. I couldn't sleep. I was wide-awake.
"Give me another chance, Serena, would you? I don't care if you're married, I just want to be with you!"
--end chapter 3--
that's it for now for ch. 3. stay tuned for 4 next wk!! or something like that.
lil_poetic_gal@hotmail.com
