It's another normal school day, except for the fact that my friends,
Gautam, Ben, Andrew, Kevin and I are walking down the street to the Bus
stop. (Horrible story why we have to go to a bus stop) When suddenly Gautam
stops, and sniffs the air.
"I smell anime! There!" He points to a box in the middle of the road. Dropping my bag and jumping into the road I dodge between cars and nearly get hit. . . twice. With much huffing and puffing I bring it back to the curb and set it down. Test 1 passed
"What kind do you think it is?" I say with excitement.
"I hope it's DBZ" Ben exclaims.
"It smells like Gundam. . . Wing. . .Post Endless Waltz!" Gautam whispers trembling with excitement.
"But that was never produced. . . legally" I mumble. "We gotta' open this and fast. Oh and Gautam get your teeth off the box that probably wont work." Gautam looks up at me in surprise, still gnawing on the box in a vain attempt to open it. He composes himself quickly.
"Who has a knife?" He says exasperated.
"I have more than that" Andrew claims, pulling a sword from his backpack. "My phat lewt roxxors!" With that he brings down the ornate glowing weapon on the tape, the entire box splits. Test 2 passed
I am very puzzled, this isn't anime! Just some kind of swirly thingy in a glass ball.
"What the hell is this? Some kind of fuggin' joke?" I say picking the orb up. "You said there was anime in here" I mutter coldly glaring at Gautam. Also angered by a lack of Anime, Ben pushes Gautam into me. . . and the orb. It falls to the ground.
"Eamp! It's broken!" Kevin shouts jumping back from the glass shards. That is all he says before vanishing, along with the rest of us. Test 3 passed
All I remember is being surrounded by a swirl of colors that have no name. I look around an apartment, everything is in cartoon! This is like the G- boys apartment from all the fanfics, everything came together! This is the apartment! I look down and at my clothes. . . my eyes widen with shock and horror.
(Exiting 1st person. . . Entering 3rd Person. . . Loading Please Wait. . . Load Successful!)
"What was that?" Wufei says.
"Sounds like the sound of ultimate suffering. . ." Trowa answers.
"We should investigate" Heero suggests. They enter the room and find a small glowing vortex on the ground.
"Hey guys wait for me!" Duo shouts in excitement as he bumps into them. Bumps them into the vortex. All phases complete
Duo stands up and cracks his neck "Eamp! What was that? AHHHH!" This awakens the other guys.
"What happened?" Wufei asks as he stands up.
"I know what happened," Heero says with excitement. . . "We're in the Gundam universe! We have switched bodies with characters from the show."
"So it seems. . ." Trowa says as he stands and looks about himself.
"Everyone say your real name so we know who is who." Heero suggests.
"Andrew" Trowa calls.
"Ben" Wufei replies.
"KevEAMPin" Duo shouts
"Gautam!" Heero says happily.
"Luther" emanates a pained voice from the shadows. From the shadows steps, Quatre!
"Haha! You're the fairy boy!" Guatam laughs.
"I may be that, Heero" Luther says with malice. "But you still got Relena" he whispers coldly.
(Five minutes later)
"You're awake. . ." Trowa/ Andrew says with relief.
"Good thing the G-boys keep smelling salts in their apartment" Luther says still in the body of Quatre. "You can't be unconscious, not today anyway. . . Look!" He says pointing to a calendar, in big red letters it says Meet Girls at Mall 8:00pm.
"What eamp! Time is it now?" Duo/Kevin asks, "There's no T.V. guide channel."
"4:00pm" Andrew says glaring at his watch.
"Leaves us 4 hours for to prepare. . ." Luther says looking around. "But we also have to figure out whose stuff is whose. Wouldn't fit for Duo to be wearing Wufei's stuff,"
"I agree, I don't want to end up being embarrassed like that" Ben replies. So the search begins in the first room. The Spartan setting narrows it down quite quickly.
"It's either Wufei or Heero," Gautam suggests. "I think we need to search around some more."
"I think I found something" Luther calls having pushed aside the bed. "It's some writing on the wall, it reads. . . Stupid stalker girl, must kill. . . then goes on for around 2 more feet." He says standing up.
"This is Heero's place" Gautam concludes, "I better find a different tank top." With much effort and odd discoveries, such as Wufei's blankie and various other horrors, everyone has finished figuring out which room is which and they begin to prepare for the night ahead.
(Exiting 3rd person. . . Entering 1st Person. . . Loading Please Wait. . . Load Successful!)
I couldn't believe it!
"Dude! Where the fugg does this wiener put his jeans and T-shirts? I haven't seen one offensive thing in this guy's closet! And what the? AAAGH!" I run out into the hallway holding up a small ball of material. "Why in God's name does he have black, silk boxers?" Guatam looks at the small ball of silk in my hands and shudders.
"I don't know. . . just put them in the garbage, they're scaring me."
"With pleasure" I say tossing them in the dust bin. "I can't stand this! I'm gonna' get him some real clothes. I'll be out for a second" With that I stomp off down the street looking for a clothing store. Within minutes I arrive at my destination and buy a small mound of T-shirts depicting flames and Rob-Zombie. Plus a large pile of jeans. I return to the apartment and find Kevin wearing Duo's normal clothes, except the priest's collar is stuffed in his pocket. While everyone looks the same. Within a few minutes I return from Quatre's room wearing dark jeans and a dark T-shirt with a flaming city on the back.
"Damn I look good! And the great thing about this body is no glasses!"
"Don't you think the girls will think something's up?" Gautam asks, decked out in standard Heero gear.
"You mean little Quatre has developed a backbone and possibly aesthetic taste?"
"You know what I mean!" Gautam shouts.
"There is no way in hell you can make me dress in that stuff!" I scream back angrily. Everyone backs off.
"Damn. . . never thought I would see Quatre angry. . ." Gautam whispers.
"Will you two stop? We're going to be late!" Ben interjects.
(At the mall: 7:55 pm)
"Eamp! . . . we're here early, what are we going to do to pass the time?" Kevin asks.
"I think we should. . . that smell! That beautiful smell! Fake fruit filling!" Guatam shouts as he is overcome by the chance of a Hostess Fruit Pie.
"And where there are pies there are Pop Tarts!" I exclaim. "A vending machine is afoot! Who's got some quarters?"
"I do Eamp!" Kevin says holding out the keys that would unlock the doors to fake fruit filling! I snatch them from his hands, using Gautam as a guide towards the vending machine.
(At the mall 8:00 pm)
"Oh glorious fruit pies" Gautam mumbles between mouthfuls.
"I shouldn't have eaten so many frosted pop tarts. . . hands. . .won't. . . stop. . . shaking. . ." I say trying to figure out a way to lower the sugar content of my blood. I nearly jump out of my skin when I hear the voice of Relena.
"We're heeeere!" she calls in a sing-song voice. "And Heero. . . why have you taken such a liking to fruit pies? You know I'm allergic to them!"
I notice that Gautam is embarrassed and pleased at the same time.
"Oh reawy? I fahgut!" Gautam's claims, pieces of Fruit Pie flying out of his mouth. I shudder then remember Kevin, who seems to be introducing Hilde to Eamp. While unlike in the series Sally Po and Wufei/Ben are getting along just fine, to many peoples surprise and confusion. Andrew is confused by all of this and asks.
"So, are the other girls late? You know for Lu. . .Quatre and I?" This causes Hilde to freeze, she walks over to Andrew confused. "Wait have you and Quatre broken up?"
"What do you mean?" Andrew asks, utterly lost. Hilde whispers into his ear pointing at me several times. Andrew's eyes widen and become bloodshot. He turns around glaring at me eyes filled with one thought, Kill with EXTREME prejudice. I feel his hands wrap around my throat and drag me in the direction of the bathroom. My neck is stinging a lot, man this body has a low pain tolerance. It's like this wiener never used it for a brawl. The grip tightens as Andrew draws out each word making them laden with malicious intent.
"Why didn't you tell me that we switched bodies with homo. . .sexuals?"
"Um. . . It was on my to-do list?" I say with a smile trying to figure out a way not to be throttled then and there.
"Well. . . this damage is unfixable! Are there any other horrible secrets about these two guys you want to tell me?"
"No this just about sums it up,"
"It better! For your sake!" he says letting me drop unceremoniously on the bathroom floor.
"Sorry man, they never really confirmed it in the series." I apologize. Andrew seems to visibly cool down, extending my life span by a few years.
"Remember we can't let them know we're different people or who knows what could happen." I say, glancing around making sure nobody can hear us.
"Despite the fact that you molded an ultra-innocent character into your twisted image. . ." Andrew points out.
"He needed and you know it!" I reply, pointing out what seems to be an obvious fact. "Anyway let's go back outside, they might think we're making out or something. . ." We both shudder.
We step outside and see that everyone has pulled themselves together; Gautam has even seemed to have removed the gobbets of Fake fruit filling from his mouth.
"So who wants to eat? I know this great French pla-" Relena is cut off by Gautam who is too full on fruit pies. . . eleven of them, to eat anything else.
"How about we walk around the mall instead. . . work up an appetite." He says. Relena is genuinely shocked.
"Why Heero I never thought I would see you full. . . on junk food. Anyway I do have a few things to pick up anyway." At this point in time Andrew and I are edging away as fast as we can without looking conspicuous. Hilde notices our uneasiness and tries to start conversation.
"So Quatre, what's with the new clothes?" I cough suddenly getting ready to change my voice. I then realize. . . DUH! We switched bodies our voices are the same as the originals.
"Oh. . .uh. . . I ran out of silk?" I say trying to think of a better reason I wouldn't look out of place in a mosh pit. "Also I wanted something a little more. conventional."
"Quatre last time I checked conventional wasn't wearing clothes darker than midnight." She muses. Before I think of an answer that makes sense I hear the call of Relena.
"Ok everyone! It's decided! Dinner is delayed we're going to shop around a bit then find a restaurant." I breathe a sigh of relief; maybe this will give me a chance to escape for a second.
"I'm going to a music store!" I say then sprint off in a random direction. I hear voices from behind me.
"Quatre! Wait! We're coming too!" this annoys me, I need a place to collect me thoughts, being in a cartoon characters body, a gay one at that is quite a shock. When I find myself in front of the music store despite the random direction I took, I remember that the G-boys never got lost. I hear many footsteps behind me, and the annoying voice of Relena.
"Wait for me!" Without glancing behind me I duck into the store and quickly search for a place they would never look for Quatre. . . or Luther.
(Five minutes later)
"Quatre? Why are you listening to Rap?" Sally Po says from behind me. I sweat-drop. It feels like a cold spot on the back of your head. Quickly taking off the head phones I turn around to face her.
"Oh? This is rap? They're talking so fast. . . sounds like Arabic. . ." Surprisingly enough she buys it.
"Really? Oh! This is the Arabic Music Section. . ." She says as she leads me over to an aisle coated with CD's and Arabic text. I pretend to browse and hope she goes away. I hear the clicking of her boots fade behind me. I hear some chatter from the next aisle over, knocking away a few boxes, I peek in. Pricking up my ears I hear a few of the words being exchanged. This gives me a slight idea of what they are saying.
"Quatre. . . funny. . .Trowa. . .no! We should fix. . ." My pupils dilate with every word. I whisper to myself two words.
"Oh fugg"
I run about the store, searching for Andrew. If I don't tell him before their plans go into action he will rip out my eyes and feed them to me. I start forming the words together filling in the spaces to confirm my suspicions. Quatre is acting funny Does he like Trowa anymore? No! We should fix them up. It's all hypotheses but I'm pretty sure of it. I look to my side hearing the whining voice of Relena.
"Are you hungry now?"
"No."
"Now?"
"NO!" Gautam shouts jumping up and down like a mad hatter. I smirk for a second before remembering my horrible, horrible dilemma. I spot Andrew ahead of me. But it's too late. . . Sally was already talking with him and he's getting angrier by the minute. I duck into the next aisle.
"Why is this happening to me? It's not fair! I give to charity! No. . . wait. . . I don't. I'm kind to people. . . scratch that. I'm moral. . . except for that time. . . DAMN! I guess I do deserve this. . . well not this specifically. What the fugg am I going to do?" I jump up hitting my head on several CD cases when I feel a shadow loom over me.
"Luther. . ." It's the voice of Andrew. "Since when have you taken a liking in Arabic music?" I look up, unknowing to the reasons I am still alive.
"Sally just started asking me about Arabic music and which did I think you'd like. Apparently she's shopping for a Christmas present or something."
(I sweat drop. again)
I tried to fill in the spaces of the talk between Sally and Hilde once more.
"Quatre likes Arab music. . . that's kinda' funny. I don't want to get him the wrong present for Christmas. I better ask Trowa. Doesn't he like rap? NO! We should fix your memory Sally." Damn I feel like an idiot. The problem is alleviated, but that leaves me with my other problem. Hunger. This is soon solved by the annoying voice of Relena Peacecraft.
"Ok everyone, Heero is hungry now! We can go eat." As Gautam passes by I make the obvious comment.
"You aren't hungry are you?"
"No but she finally shut up" Gautam says with a smile.
"Sounds good to me. So where is she dragging us to eat?"
"I have no idea. . . I wonder why we hate her already."
"Simple, remember Relena-rific?" Gautam looks back into the past and shudders.
"Good point" he says with a small smile. We suddenly arrive at a quaint French restaurant. I wonder if they had Cracker Jacks. We sit down at an especially large table and we are approached by a snooty waiter with an extremely fake French accent.
"So what would you people like to drink?" He says, adding under his breath "Something cheap I bet" I smile inwardly; I was going to have a lot of fun with this man.
"I'll have a large glass of Ice Water" I say trying to stay serious.
"So will we" Relena says, answering for everyone else.
"ActEAMPualy, Hilde and I will have two beers." Kevin says to everyone's surprise. I see Gautam lean over to Kevin and hear their brief exchange.
"What do you mean two beers?"
"This is the only chance at legal alcohol I'll have for a while."
"You've been hanging around Luther for too long"
"At least I'm enjoying my company" Kevin says with a smile. This ends the argument quite quickly leaving Gautam smoldering. By this time the waiter has left. Conversation is not exactly ample. . . in fact the table is completely devoid of it.
"So. . .um. . .read any good books lately?" says Ben trying to displace the uneasy silence.
"Nope. . ."
"Nah"
"No"
"Can't say I have"
"Neither have I"
"Not really"
"N-"The stream of No's is cut off by an exasperated Ben, who seems to be getting more frustrated by the minute.
"I get the point! Nobody has read anything." He slumps down into his chair and tries to think of something else to say. I hear the footsteps of the waiter from behind me and smile. It's show time. The glasses and two mugs are set down on the table. Clink. I turn around to the waiter who still looks like he has an unpleasant smell under his nose and say.
"But waiter, I never asked for Ice Water. . .I said I would have some Rice wine Waiter." I look to the others and wink. As reception to my idea of a good time most are smiling, while Relena and Sally are slightly shocked. I hear him grumble and march off cursing his luck.
"Quatre! That's horrible! And why are you ordering Sake?" says and indignant Relena. I smirk and say.
"If you heard what he was saying about us under his breath you would agree to have some fun at his expense." I say. "Anyhow I'm not done yet. . . so don't worry about me drinking Sake. Oh, look here he comes." Clink. "Hey I never said: I would have Rice Wine Waiter. I said: Have a Nice Time Waiter!"
"Then what do you want? He says, utterly exasperated.
"Oh! I'll have a Coke." I say trying to look as innocent possible.
"Eamp! And we'll have two more beers!" says Kevin with a larger-than- average-grin. The waiter stomps off behind me to fetch us our beverages.
"Ok I'm done now. He's learned his lesson." I say mimicking Kevin's grin.
"Quatre since when have you developed such an odd sense of justice?" Sally Po asks with a frown. "You've been spending too much time with Duo."
"Well it's not exactly like I can move out." I say. "On another note what are we going to have to eat?" I see everyone pick up the encyclopedic menus and search around. I decide to have the Spaghetti Bolognese, while most of the others decide on simple salads, except for Kevin who has ordered Veal, and two more beers. It's not soon that everyone notices Kevin/Duo's sudden attachment to alcohol.
"Ke. . .Duo. . . you better lay off any more beer. You're looking a tad tipsy. . ." Andrew says eyeing his inebriated friend. Kevin glances off to Andrew's right. "Trow-whatever your name is! I'm ok, I just think you want some of my beer, well get some of your own!" I almost jump out of my seat when I hear a thump. I look underneath the table Kevin is asleep underneath the table.
"Yep he's drunk" I say rather callously. "We better finish up and take him back to the apartment." Everyone finishes up quickly and we drag him back to the apartment and heave him onto the couch. The girls leave, leaving us to our own devices.
"Well it could have been worse" Gautam says, "Relena could've kissed me goodnight."
"Or I could've acted like the real Quatre," I say eyeballing Andrew who looks like he's about to slug me. "It's amazing how quickly we've adapted to this, I mean you'd think we'd have gone through shock our something. I guess years of reading fanfics and dreaming of being here has prepared us." Suddenly I jump back as a hole appears in the floor and men in white robes step out. "Wha? Who are you?" Greetings! We are the controllers of the Gundam Wing Reality. You are here because the G-boys, as you call them have needed a vacation. So you switched bodies with them letting you have some fun at the same time. This lets them visit your so-called "Real World" and they will now see through your eyes the world you live in and what you would be doing, they can't control you in the real world, so you are acting how you normally would. I stare at these men.
"Your voices sound familiar. . ."
We are not the scientist!
"I never said you were. . ."
We are not!
"Well how long is their vacation going to last?"
Who knows? It's their choice! "So I guess where here for a while." I say to everyone, who seems to have no problem with this at all.
The end of this chapter. . .
"I smell anime! There!" He points to a box in the middle of the road. Dropping my bag and jumping into the road I dodge between cars and nearly get hit. . . twice. With much huffing and puffing I bring it back to the curb and set it down. Test 1 passed
"What kind do you think it is?" I say with excitement.
"I hope it's DBZ" Ben exclaims.
"It smells like Gundam. . . Wing. . .Post Endless Waltz!" Gautam whispers trembling with excitement.
"But that was never produced. . . legally" I mumble. "We gotta' open this and fast. Oh and Gautam get your teeth off the box that probably wont work." Gautam looks up at me in surprise, still gnawing on the box in a vain attempt to open it. He composes himself quickly.
"Who has a knife?" He says exasperated.
"I have more than that" Andrew claims, pulling a sword from his backpack. "My phat lewt roxxors!" With that he brings down the ornate glowing weapon on the tape, the entire box splits. Test 2 passed
I am very puzzled, this isn't anime! Just some kind of swirly thingy in a glass ball.
"What the hell is this? Some kind of fuggin' joke?" I say picking the orb up. "You said there was anime in here" I mutter coldly glaring at Gautam. Also angered by a lack of Anime, Ben pushes Gautam into me. . . and the orb. It falls to the ground.
"Eamp! It's broken!" Kevin shouts jumping back from the glass shards. That is all he says before vanishing, along with the rest of us. Test 3 passed
All I remember is being surrounded by a swirl of colors that have no name. I look around an apartment, everything is in cartoon! This is like the G- boys apartment from all the fanfics, everything came together! This is the apartment! I look down and at my clothes. . . my eyes widen with shock and horror.
(Exiting 1st person. . . Entering 3rd Person. . . Loading Please Wait. . . Load Successful!)
"What was that?" Wufei says.
"Sounds like the sound of ultimate suffering. . ." Trowa answers.
"We should investigate" Heero suggests. They enter the room and find a small glowing vortex on the ground.
"Hey guys wait for me!" Duo shouts in excitement as he bumps into them. Bumps them into the vortex. All phases complete
Duo stands up and cracks his neck "Eamp! What was that? AHHHH!" This awakens the other guys.
"What happened?" Wufei asks as he stands up.
"I know what happened," Heero says with excitement. . . "We're in the Gundam universe! We have switched bodies with characters from the show."
"So it seems. . ." Trowa says as he stands and looks about himself.
"Everyone say your real name so we know who is who." Heero suggests.
"Andrew" Trowa calls.
"Ben" Wufei replies.
"KevEAMPin" Duo shouts
"Gautam!" Heero says happily.
"Luther" emanates a pained voice from the shadows. From the shadows steps, Quatre!
"Haha! You're the fairy boy!" Guatam laughs.
"I may be that, Heero" Luther says with malice. "But you still got Relena" he whispers coldly.
(Five minutes later)
"You're awake. . ." Trowa/ Andrew says with relief.
"Good thing the G-boys keep smelling salts in their apartment" Luther says still in the body of Quatre. "You can't be unconscious, not today anyway. . . Look!" He says pointing to a calendar, in big red letters it says Meet Girls at Mall 8:00pm.
"What eamp! Time is it now?" Duo/Kevin asks, "There's no T.V. guide channel."
"4:00pm" Andrew says glaring at his watch.
"Leaves us 4 hours for to prepare. . ." Luther says looking around. "But we also have to figure out whose stuff is whose. Wouldn't fit for Duo to be wearing Wufei's stuff,"
"I agree, I don't want to end up being embarrassed like that" Ben replies. So the search begins in the first room. The Spartan setting narrows it down quite quickly.
"It's either Wufei or Heero," Gautam suggests. "I think we need to search around some more."
"I think I found something" Luther calls having pushed aside the bed. "It's some writing on the wall, it reads. . . Stupid stalker girl, must kill. . . then goes on for around 2 more feet." He says standing up.
"This is Heero's place" Gautam concludes, "I better find a different tank top." With much effort and odd discoveries, such as Wufei's blankie and various other horrors, everyone has finished figuring out which room is which and they begin to prepare for the night ahead.
(Exiting 3rd person. . . Entering 1st Person. . . Loading Please Wait. . . Load Successful!)
I couldn't believe it!
"Dude! Where the fugg does this wiener put his jeans and T-shirts? I haven't seen one offensive thing in this guy's closet! And what the? AAAGH!" I run out into the hallway holding up a small ball of material. "Why in God's name does he have black, silk boxers?" Guatam looks at the small ball of silk in my hands and shudders.
"I don't know. . . just put them in the garbage, they're scaring me."
"With pleasure" I say tossing them in the dust bin. "I can't stand this! I'm gonna' get him some real clothes. I'll be out for a second" With that I stomp off down the street looking for a clothing store. Within minutes I arrive at my destination and buy a small mound of T-shirts depicting flames and Rob-Zombie. Plus a large pile of jeans. I return to the apartment and find Kevin wearing Duo's normal clothes, except the priest's collar is stuffed in his pocket. While everyone looks the same. Within a few minutes I return from Quatre's room wearing dark jeans and a dark T-shirt with a flaming city on the back.
"Damn I look good! And the great thing about this body is no glasses!"
"Don't you think the girls will think something's up?" Gautam asks, decked out in standard Heero gear.
"You mean little Quatre has developed a backbone and possibly aesthetic taste?"
"You know what I mean!" Gautam shouts.
"There is no way in hell you can make me dress in that stuff!" I scream back angrily. Everyone backs off.
"Damn. . . never thought I would see Quatre angry. . ." Gautam whispers.
"Will you two stop? We're going to be late!" Ben interjects.
(At the mall: 7:55 pm)
"Eamp! . . . we're here early, what are we going to do to pass the time?" Kevin asks.
"I think we should. . . that smell! That beautiful smell! Fake fruit filling!" Guatam shouts as he is overcome by the chance of a Hostess Fruit Pie.
"And where there are pies there are Pop Tarts!" I exclaim. "A vending machine is afoot! Who's got some quarters?"
"I do Eamp!" Kevin says holding out the keys that would unlock the doors to fake fruit filling! I snatch them from his hands, using Gautam as a guide towards the vending machine.
(At the mall 8:00 pm)
"Oh glorious fruit pies" Gautam mumbles between mouthfuls.
"I shouldn't have eaten so many frosted pop tarts. . . hands. . .won't. . . stop. . . shaking. . ." I say trying to figure out a way to lower the sugar content of my blood. I nearly jump out of my skin when I hear the voice of Relena.
"We're heeeere!" she calls in a sing-song voice. "And Heero. . . why have you taken such a liking to fruit pies? You know I'm allergic to them!"
I notice that Gautam is embarrassed and pleased at the same time.
"Oh reawy? I fahgut!" Gautam's claims, pieces of Fruit Pie flying out of his mouth. I shudder then remember Kevin, who seems to be introducing Hilde to Eamp. While unlike in the series Sally Po and Wufei/Ben are getting along just fine, to many peoples surprise and confusion. Andrew is confused by all of this and asks.
"So, are the other girls late? You know for Lu. . .Quatre and I?" This causes Hilde to freeze, she walks over to Andrew confused. "Wait have you and Quatre broken up?"
"What do you mean?" Andrew asks, utterly lost. Hilde whispers into his ear pointing at me several times. Andrew's eyes widen and become bloodshot. He turns around glaring at me eyes filled with one thought, Kill with EXTREME prejudice. I feel his hands wrap around my throat and drag me in the direction of the bathroom. My neck is stinging a lot, man this body has a low pain tolerance. It's like this wiener never used it for a brawl. The grip tightens as Andrew draws out each word making them laden with malicious intent.
"Why didn't you tell me that we switched bodies with homo. . .sexuals?"
"Um. . . It was on my to-do list?" I say with a smile trying to figure out a way not to be throttled then and there.
"Well. . . this damage is unfixable! Are there any other horrible secrets about these two guys you want to tell me?"
"No this just about sums it up,"
"It better! For your sake!" he says letting me drop unceremoniously on the bathroom floor.
"Sorry man, they never really confirmed it in the series." I apologize. Andrew seems to visibly cool down, extending my life span by a few years.
"Remember we can't let them know we're different people or who knows what could happen." I say, glancing around making sure nobody can hear us.
"Despite the fact that you molded an ultra-innocent character into your twisted image. . ." Andrew points out.
"He needed and you know it!" I reply, pointing out what seems to be an obvious fact. "Anyway let's go back outside, they might think we're making out or something. . ." We both shudder.
We step outside and see that everyone has pulled themselves together; Gautam has even seemed to have removed the gobbets of Fake fruit filling from his mouth.
"So who wants to eat? I know this great French pla-" Relena is cut off by Gautam who is too full on fruit pies. . . eleven of them, to eat anything else.
"How about we walk around the mall instead. . . work up an appetite." He says. Relena is genuinely shocked.
"Why Heero I never thought I would see you full. . . on junk food. Anyway I do have a few things to pick up anyway." At this point in time Andrew and I are edging away as fast as we can without looking conspicuous. Hilde notices our uneasiness and tries to start conversation.
"So Quatre, what's with the new clothes?" I cough suddenly getting ready to change my voice. I then realize. . . DUH! We switched bodies our voices are the same as the originals.
"Oh. . .uh. . . I ran out of silk?" I say trying to think of a better reason I wouldn't look out of place in a mosh pit. "Also I wanted something a little more. conventional."
"Quatre last time I checked conventional wasn't wearing clothes darker than midnight." She muses. Before I think of an answer that makes sense I hear the call of Relena.
"Ok everyone! It's decided! Dinner is delayed we're going to shop around a bit then find a restaurant." I breathe a sigh of relief; maybe this will give me a chance to escape for a second.
"I'm going to a music store!" I say then sprint off in a random direction. I hear voices from behind me.
"Quatre! Wait! We're coming too!" this annoys me, I need a place to collect me thoughts, being in a cartoon characters body, a gay one at that is quite a shock. When I find myself in front of the music store despite the random direction I took, I remember that the G-boys never got lost. I hear many footsteps behind me, and the annoying voice of Relena.
"Wait for me!" Without glancing behind me I duck into the store and quickly search for a place they would never look for Quatre. . . or Luther.
(Five minutes later)
"Quatre? Why are you listening to Rap?" Sally Po says from behind me. I sweat-drop. It feels like a cold spot on the back of your head. Quickly taking off the head phones I turn around to face her.
"Oh? This is rap? They're talking so fast. . . sounds like Arabic. . ." Surprisingly enough she buys it.
"Really? Oh! This is the Arabic Music Section. . ." She says as she leads me over to an aisle coated with CD's and Arabic text. I pretend to browse and hope she goes away. I hear the clicking of her boots fade behind me. I hear some chatter from the next aisle over, knocking away a few boxes, I peek in. Pricking up my ears I hear a few of the words being exchanged. This gives me a slight idea of what they are saying.
"Quatre. . . funny. . .Trowa. . .no! We should fix. . ." My pupils dilate with every word. I whisper to myself two words.
"Oh fugg"
I run about the store, searching for Andrew. If I don't tell him before their plans go into action he will rip out my eyes and feed them to me. I start forming the words together filling in the spaces to confirm my suspicions. Quatre is acting funny Does he like Trowa anymore? No! We should fix them up. It's all hypotheses but I'm pretty sure of it. I look to my side hearing the whining voice of Relena.
"Are you hungry now?"
"No."
"Now?"
"NO!" Gautam shouts jumping up and down like a mad hatter. I smirk for a second before remembering my horrible, horrible dilemma. I spot Andrew ahead of me. But it's too late. . . Sally was already talking with him and he's getting angrier by the minute. I duck into the next aisle.
"Why is this happening to me? It's not fair! I give to charity! No. . . wait. . . I don't. I'm kind to people. . . scratch that. I'm moral. . . except for that time. . . DAMN! I guess I do deserve this. . . well not this specifically. What the fugg am I going to do?" I jump up hitting my head on several CD cases when I feel a shadow loom over me.
"Luther. . ." It's the voice of Andrew. "Since when have you taken a liking in Arabic music?" I look up, unknowing to the reasons I am still alive.
"Sally just started asking me about Arabic music and which did I think you'd like. Apparently she's shopping for a Christmas present or something."
(I sweat drop. again)
I tried to fill in the spaces of the talk between Sally and Hilde once more.
"Quatre likes Arab music. . . that's kinda' funny. I don't want to get him the wrong present for Christmas. I better ask Trowa. Doesn't he like rap? NO! We should fix your memory Sally." Damn I feel like an idiot. The problem is alleviated, but that leaves me with my other problem. Hunger. This is soon solved by the annoying voice of Relena Peacecraft.
"Ok everyone, Heero is hungry now! We can go eat." As Gautam passes by I make the obvious comment.
"You aren't hungry are you?"
"No but she finally shut up" Gautam says with a smile.
"Sounds good to me. So where is she dragging us to eat?"
"I have no idea. . . I wonder why we hate her already."
"Simple, remember Relena-rific?" Gautam looks back into the past and shudders.
"Good point" he says with a small smile. We suddenly arrive at a quaint French restaurant. I wonder if they had Cracker Jacks. We sit down at an especially large table and we are approached by a snooty waiter with an extremely fake French accent.
"So what would you people like to drink?" He says, adding under his breath "Something cheap I bet" I smile inwardly; I was going to have a lot of fun with this man.
"I'll have a large glass of Ice Water" I say trying to stay serious.
"So will we" Relena says, answering for everyone else.
"ActEAMPualy, Hilde and I will have two beers." Kevin says to everyone's surprise. I see Gautam lean over to Kevin and hear their brief exchange.
"What do you mean two beers?"
"This is the only chance at legal alcohol I'll have for a while."
"You've been hanging around Luther for too long"
"At least I'm enjoying my company" Kevin says with a smile. This ends the argument quite quickly leaving Gautam smoldering. By this time the waiter has left. Conversation is not exactly ample. . . in fact the table is completely devoid of it.
"So. . .um. . .read any good books lately?" says Ben trying to displace the uneasy silence.
"Nope. . ."
"Nah"
"No"
"Can't say I have"
"Neither have I"
"Not really"
"N-"The stream of No's is cut off by an exasperated Ben, who seems to be getting more frustrated by the minute.
"I get the point! Nobody has read anything." He slumps down into his chair and tries to think of something else to say. I hear the footsteps of the waiter from behind me and smile. It's show time. The glasses and two mugs are set down on the table. Clink. I turn around to the waiter who still looks like he has an unpleasant smell under his nose and say.
"But waiter, I never asked for Ice Water. . .I said I would have some Rice wine Waiter." I look to the others and wink. As reception to my idea of a good time most are smiling, while Relena and Sally are slightly shocked. I hear him grumble and march off cursing his luck.
"Quatre! That's horrible! And why are you ordering Sake?" says and indignant Relena. I smirk and say.
"If you heard what he was saying about us under his breath you would agree to have some fun at his expense." I say. "Anyhow I'm not done yet. . . so don't worry about me drinking Sake. Oh, look here he comes." Clink. "Hey I never said: I would have Rice Wine Waiter. I said: Have a Nice Time Waiter!"
"Then what do you want? He says, utterly exasperated.
"Oh! I'll have a Coke." I say trying to look as innocent possible.
"Eamp! And we'll have two more beers!" says Kevin with a larger-than- average-grin. The waiter stomps off behind me to fetch us our beverages.
"Ok I'm done now. He's learned his lesson." I say mimicking Kevin's grin.
"Quatre since when have you developed such an odd sense of justice?" Sally Po asks with a frown. "You've been spending too much time with Duo."
"Well it's not exactly like I can move out." I say. "On another note what are we going to have to eat?" I see everyone pick up the encyclopedic menus and search around. I decide to have the Spaghetti Bolognese, while most of the others decide on simple salads, except for Kevin who has ordered Veal, and two more beers. It's not soon that everyone notices Kevin/Duo's sudden attachment to alcohol.
"Ke. . .Duo. . . you better lay off any more beer. You're looking a tad tipsy. . ." Andrew says eyeing his inebriated friend. Kevin glances off to Andrew's right. "Trow-whatever your name is! I'm ok, I just think you want some of my beer, well get some of your own!" I almost jump out of my seat when I hear a thump. I look underneath the table Kevin is asleep underneath the table.
"Yep he's drunk" I say rather callously. "We better finish up and take him back to the apartment." Everyone finishes up quickly and we drag him back to the apartment and heave him onto the couch. The girls leave, leaving us to our own devices.
"Well it could have been worse" Gautam says, "Relena could've kissed me goodnight."
"Or I could've acted like the real Quatre," I say eyeballing Andrew who looks like he's about to slug me. "It's amazing how quickly we've adapted to this, I mean you'd think we'd have gone through shock our something. I guess years of reading fanfics and dreaming of being here has prepared us." Suddenly I jump back as a hole appears in the floor and men in white robes step out. "Wha? Who are you?" Greetings! We are the controllers of the Gundam Wing Reality. You are here because the G-boys, as you call them have needed a vacation. So you switched bodies with them letting you have some fun at the same time. This lets them visit your so-called "Real World" and they will now see through your eyes the world you live in and what you would be doing, they can't control you in the real world, so you are acting how you normally would. I stare at these men.
"Your voices sound familiar. . ."
We are not the scientist!
"I never said you were. . ."
We are not!
"Well how long is their vacation going to last?"
Who knows? It's their choice! "So I guess where here for a while." I say to everyone, who seems to have no problem with this at all.
The end of this chapter. . .
