OK, this is my second fanfic, my first songfic. The song is 'Sunflowers'
by Everclear. Yay! Everclear *Does the happy little Wolfie dance (which is
very similar to the happy little buffalo dance but it's happier because the
happy little Wolfie ate the happy little (deceased) buffalo)*
I would just like to thank everybody who reviewed my last fic (well those who constructively reviewed it that is ^_^).
I have tried to follow the advice I have been sent by everyone. As such you will not find ANY authors notes throughout this fic (it's harder then it sounds).
It has been thoroughly spell and grammar checked (hopefully ^_^)
It has no Davis bashing (I just totally left him out hehehe) - I really don't mind the guy, I made some cracks about him in my last fic and got totally flamed. Argh, my sense of humor gets me in trouble again!
I really want to thank Renegade for sharing her absolutely weird life experiences with me (do horses taste buds work like human ones? Ask Ren, she'll tell ya)
Together Again for helping me keep AAUK inline ^_^
RockyRobin38 'cos he's a good writer and a nice guy.
Sir Brass of Pen for writing looooong reviews (if you have gotten on from him you'll know what I'm talking about.)
And last but not least Ms.SweetiePie for writing awesome songfics and inspiring me to do this!!!
Disclaimer: I don't own Everclear, but I do own Digimon, no really I do! (If you believe that, I have a plot on the moon I'm willing to sell for US$100 ^_^)
~~~~~
Matt watched as Cody left the garage where he and his band were practicing.
~ I never knew that the whole Angemon/Devimon experience was still haunting T.K. ~
Matt mentally kicked himself, T.K. was his younger brother, he should be the one to notice when he was troubled, not some little kid who just meet T.K. It's not like he didn't expect something like this to happen, he sensed something was wrong but thought that T.K. could sort it out on his own, eventually.
"Yo Ishada! You still in there?" ~ Why the hell are all drummers such big mouths? ~
"Umm, guys, I think we should call it a night, it's getting pretty late, and plus we're damn near perfect" ~ That should stop them from asking questions ~
"Hey Matt, why are you leaving so early, your usually the one who says near perfect is not near enough, did that kid say something to upset you?"
"Oh hahaHA!" The other band members were chatting while the packed up their gear. Matt on the other hand grabbed his bass, shoved it in his carry case and took off.
"Come on T.K., pick up." Matt muttered impatiently.
"Wasssssssup!!!"
"...T.K. what the hell have you been eating?"
".Oh, hehehe, hi Matt"
"Ohhh, now I get it, are you expecting a call from Kaaaaaari?" Matt said in the patronizing big brother voice.
".If you've rung me to start up on that whole me and Kari thing." T.K. sighed, he had heard this many times before.
"Nah, nah, nah, I just rung up 'cause I thought that you would want to know that your little friend Cody has just come 'round to speak to me"
"Oh really, what did he want?"
"It was really inconvenient, as we were right in the middle of pract."
"Mattttt! I don't really need to know all that do I? Please just tell me what Cody wanted, it must have something to do with me if you're ringing me up"
"Well, he just wanted to know, what the deal with you and the 'powers of darkness', you know, why you get pissed every time a new enemy appears." Matt could sense T.K. tense up on the other end of the phone. After a couple of seconds T.K. released the breath he was holding.
".and you told him." T.K. waited for his brother to fill in the blanks.
".I told him about Devimon. He had a right to know because." Matt was just about to justify his actions, he really didn't want to go behind T.K.'s back and tell everybody about his private life, it's just that this could endanger his little brothers life, not to mention the rest of the digidestined.
"Oh, thanks Matt, I hope you made Cody feel better about every thing." T.K. spat out sarcastically. "Talk to you later."
"'Kay, later"
*Click*
Matt couldn't understand, why wouldn't T.K. tell him if he was still concerned about that Angemon/Devimon battle. Sure there was that whole thing about the importance of life outweighing the powers of darkness but it's not like it was....his fault Angemon was deleted. ~ That has to be it! ~ T.K. must blame himself for losing Angemon. But it wasn't his fault. Just like it wasn't your fault when you couldn't protect T.K. all the time. ~ God I hate it when the voices in my head start to make more sense then me. ~
Cody had told Matt how sometimes T.K. would disappear by himself. Once Cody had followed T.K., he had been lead to a big canyon. T.K. sunk to his knees and started to punch the ground until blood started to form on his knuckles.
I know where you go
When you want to fall
Why do you want to be broken?
I know where you go
When you want to fall
Yes your friends they tell me everything
Cody then told Matt how he got as close as possible to T.K. without alerting him. He had over heard T.K. cursing, going on about someone who was weak and pathetic and couldn't protect those who he held dear.
Upon hearing this, Matt automatically assumed that T.K. must have been talking about him. How he couldn't hold the family together and how he couldn't protect T.K. in the digital world. Matt now realized that T.K. must have been talking about himself. He crawled into bed thinking of his baby brother, how he had grown up too fast.
Yes I know where you go
Yes I know what you do
Yes I know the awful things you say
And who you say them to
Yes I know where you go
Yes I know what you do
As the sun filtered through the blinds Matt stretched and smiled. Today the brothers had decided that the whole day, they were going to spend it with each other. Sure they got to see each other more often now, but it was just a 'hi' and 'bye'. ~ Maybe I could ask him what's going on in his life, without chasing him away. damn I need a shower ~ Matt realized that he didn't have a shower after the practice last night, when he really should of. He rolled out of bed and stumbled towards the shower. ~ Damn, what was I thinking telling him to come around so early, it's the weekend and I have to get up at half past eight. ~
After he got out of the shower, Matt was re-energized, he threw on his clothes. Instead of the tight constricting black top and jeans, he settled on a white tank top with a baggy black unbuttoned shirt over the top and.some jeans.they were baggier then usual because the boys had decided to go out rollerblading along the beach. Matt strutted out into the lounge, his father was out again, that's the problem with working in the media.
"And what time do you call this?" A voice startled Matt out of his own little world.
"T.K. I thought we agreed to meet up at half past nine?" Matt eyed up his brother. He was wearing tan cargo shorts, a tight white singlet and a green unbuttoned shirt over the top. Very similar to what he was wearing, this made Matt smile.
"Matt, I thought that you learned how to read a clock in primary school." T.K. said innocently.
If looks could kill, T.K. would be six feet under and pushing up daisies.
"T.K. I checked the clock before I jumped into the shower and it now is. quarter to ten.uhh, sorry bro." Matt apologized.
"Don't worry, I expected as much, you'll probably just looking at yourself in the mirror again."
*WHACK!* The cushion made contact with T.K.'s head.
"Hey! What was that for?!?" T.K. pouted.
"Oh, don't try that crap with me, it may work on Mum but you know perfectly well you deserved that, if not more!"
"Hehehe, oh well, you never know unless you try, so are we going now?"
"Just got to do my hair" Matt made his way, back to his room.
T.K. groaned.
The brothers finally made their way out of the apartment by half past ten.
They made their way to the beach front, sat down on the bench and strapped on their blades. After two hours of racing, dodging and basically having fun, T.K. decided it was more then past lunch time. They made their way to the local beach front café and placed their orders. Matt quickly darted outside and grabbed one of the remaining tables while T.K. waited for their lunch.
"T.K. over here"
T.K. made his way over to the table where his big brother was sitting.
"Here you go, hamburger with extra Tabasco sauce and wasbi, you know, I don't get it how you can eat such weird, hot things and still live" T.K. shook his head in disbelief.
"I take it that this hamburger with jellybeans in it is yours then." T.K. snatched his weird combination off Matt.
"Hey, as I remember, you're the one that made me eat it in the first place!" T.K. poked out his tongue.
"It was a dare you weren't meant to like it" Matt poked his tongue back.
".I suppose we're both as bad as each other then huh?" T.K. smirked.
"Yeah, we're alike in a lot of ways aren't we."
"I suppose so"
"Not just physical things either."
".What are you talking about now, Matt? Has that weird 'food' finally caught up with you?" T.K. asked amused.
"We both have been through things that we can't control, but we still blame ourselves" Matt was looking down as he said this, he slowly looked up and stared into T.K.'s eyes, hoping to find an answer.
"T.K. I know how you feel"
I know how you feel
You get crazy inside
They say it runs in the family
When he realized he wouldn't get an answer Matt continued.
"T.K. I've been there before, I know what you're going through bro." Still no response.
"You know, one of the reasons I thought about us having a day together is that mum actually told me that your starting to act a little strange lately. Sometimes you'll get all silent, otherwise you'll be really moody and then you bugger off by yourself for hours on end. She more or less told me that you were acting like.well, me." Matt said with a wry smile.
I know just how you feel
When you get crazy inside
Your mom said that
You are just like me
"T.K.!!!" Matt was starting to get fed up, but this got T.K.'s attention.
"Look T.K., I know how you feel, you're blaming yourself for something that was completely out of your control" T.K.'s eyes glazed over, he was hiding something.
"I don't know what you're talking about Matt" he spat back, clenching his hands into fists so tight, his knuckles turned white.
"I think I had better get going home now, I suddenly feel exhausted" T.K. stood to leave, "Look Matt don't worry about me, honestly I'll be fine, I'll catch up with you later." With that T.K. left Matt sitting by himself with the two similar but different burgers.
I can see it in your eyes
I can see it in your shaky hands
I think you think I'm stupid
You don't think I understand
I see you and see myself
When I was a younger man
Matt cringed. His mother was right, T.K. was acting just like he used to. Instead of using the people around him to help himself, he pretended that everything was OK, and tried to push everybody away. It didn't seem that long ago that T.K. was a sweet little boy who would find the silver lining in any storm. The little boy who could cheer anybody up, by just being his bright, energetic self.
Matt started to reminisce about the times when T.K. had made all the difference to him. There was one occasion that he would never forget, when they were still living together as a family. Their parents had decided to take a day trip out to the country. They ended up pulling into a plant nursery / café. Matt could distinctly remember being bored out of his skull, walking up a long track, surrounded by some spiny looking flowers. Matt's parents were already about 10 meters in front of Matt, when they told him to get T.K. and meet them in the café. Matt started back up the track to find his little brother, it didn't take long to find him as he was just around the corner.
"Hey, Keru, we better hurry up, Mum and Dad will already be at the café by now.Keru.Hello, is anybody in there?" Matt was for all intensive purposes, talking to himself, as his brother was completely mesmerized by a tall looking flower.
"Come on Keru, let's get going" Matt took his brothers hand and tried to pull him away.
"No, Yama, look at this."
"I saw it Keru, it's a big flower."
"No, it's not just a big flower it's so pretty and bright and strong and, and."
"Big?" T.K. turned his bright eyes toward Matt and smiled.
"Hehehe you read my mind Yama."
"Come on lets just go back now huh?"
Some how when they returned home, T.K. had convinced his parents to let him paint sunflowers in his room. He was always so happy-go-lucky and honest. Matt missed that about his little brother.
When you were a child
You were happy and free
You were my reason to live
I would die when you smiled at me
I can still see you
I remember you painting
Sunflowers in your room
Matt left the café, yet he felt an overwhelming urge to visit his brother and to try and help him out. Instead of catching the train home, Matt started to walk to his mothers and brothers apartment.
After, knocking on the door for ten seconds, he pulled out his key and unlocked the door. He walked into the apartment.
"Mum? T.K.? Anybody home?"
"Matt?"
"Patamon?"
"Oh hey Matt." Patamon came out of his hiding place.
"Hey Patamon, you wouldn't happen to know where my little brother is would you?"
"Your little brother?" the digimon replied with a confused look on his face. "Ohhh, you mean T.K., umm, no I don't know where he went, he might have gone to the digiworld."
"Oh thank you Patamon, now I'll just go through and see what's up with him"
"Umm, Matt, you might want to go upstairs and talk to Cody or Yolie."
"Why is that Patamon , he is my brother, so I'm the one who should be looking out for him not."
"Only the new digidestined can open the portal."
"Oh, hehehe, that's right"
After thanking Patamon, Matt decided to go see Cody as he really didn't want to explain this all to Yolie.
"Hey, Matt, do you want me to take you to the place where I saw T.K.?"
"No, it's alright thank you Cody, I'm pretty sure I know were it is" Matt snapped. "Sorry Cody. do you mind wanting here while I go and find him?"
"No, I don't mind" Cody answered looking at the ground.
Matt didn't mean to snap - it's just that he kinda resented Cody because he seemed to pick up on the fact something was wrong with T.K. before he did. ~ I know he means well, I'll apologize properly when I get back.~
Matt trudged on to the place where he thought his brother would be. ~ Bingo. ~
I know where you go
When you want to fall
Hey don't you want to be happy?
There, kneeling, face down to the ground was T.K. Cody had told Matt about a canyon, after he had thought about it, he knew it had to be the one where Angemon was deleted.
As he crept closer, Matt could bearly make out what T.K. was saying.
"Not only did you lose your digimon but now you're losing your friends. All these years of keeping up this façade, and then Cody sees through it easily. You're so useless. You can't even convince a child of your feelings."
I know where you go
When you want to fall
You're useless friends
They tell me everything
Everything
It really killed Matt to see his baby brother like this. He was only twelve, yet he had seen more pain and suffering then most adults. ~ Kind of ironic that he has the Crest of Hope. ~
Not only had he seen his own digimon deleted in front of his eyes trying to protect him, his family disintegrated around him but he had also seen many digimon die needlessly.
Somehow, T.K. had managed to deal with this all on his own, but now, it was obvious that he wouldn't be able to deal with it by himself for much longer. T.K. had put up an act to everyone. He was viewed as the bright and bubbly digidestined who was never down, but every now and then, his exterior shell cracked. When this happened, T.K. lashed out at what he deemed 'evil'. ~ Ken can sure vouch for that. ~
I see you run around in circles
I see you digging your own hole
I see you fight the fights
You just can't win
I see you losing self-control
What it does to me
Deep down inside
I hope you'll never know
As T.K. got up to leave, Matt crouched back into the shadows, thankfully T.K. was going to another T.V. and not the one Cody was sitting next too. As T.K. passed by, Matt caught the depressed look on T.K.'s face. ~ Poor little guy, he had to grow up so fast. ~
Matt's memory again flashed back to when T.K.'s room had been painted.
"Hey Yama!" T.K. beamed his smile again at his big brother.
"What is it now Keru?" Matt asked as he ruffled the younger boy's hair.
"I painted you a picture! Here, it's Kitty." The smile got bigger as Matt unfolded the picture.
"Hey, that's really good Keru, but there's one problem."
T.K. looked at his big brother questionably.
"Cat's aren't green Keru, hahaha"
"They CAN be!" T.K. poked out his tongue, giggling.
"Well, I suppose they could be. If you painted them!"
The boys started laughing, but ten minutes later, Matt regretted saying that.
"Yamato, could you please come here for a second?"
"Sure mum, what's the matt...." Matt couldn't finish of the sentence, because cowering in the corner was a slightly scared, green cat.
"See Matt!" T.K. beamed yet again. "Told ya there is such a thing as a green cat!"
When you were a child
You were happy and free
You were my reason to live
I would die when you smiled at me
I can still see you
Painting flowers on the wall
I remember you happy
I remember it all
Smiling as he walked back, remembering when his younger sibling was care free, Matt started to frown ~ It's so unfair that he has to go through all this, he is STILL only a little kid! ~ Finally with his mind made up, Matt had decided to confront T.K. about this.
"Are you ready to go back now Matt?" Cody asked quietly.
"Yes I am Cody, and thank you"
"For what?"
"For looking out for my little brother, I'm afraid that our family has a bit of a problem expressing our feelings constructively, as you've probably noticed by now." Matt grinned sheepishly.
"Don't mention it Matt, I'm only glad that I could help." Cody bowed.
~ Nice kid, but he can be kinda freaky with his over-politeness. ~
Once back in the real world, Matt took the elevator to T.K.'s floor. This time instead of waiting, Matt was greeted with a "Coming!"
"Oh, Matt. It's only you"
"Why, were you expecting someone? Oh, I know, you were expecting Kaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar."SLAM!!!
"Oh, that's REALLY mature!!!" Matt yelled through the door.
"Look who's talking" T.K. retaliated when he opened the door grinning.
"Touché"
"Drink?"
"No thanks, got band practice soon, I just stopped by to see how you are."
"I'm fine Matt, really I already told you this!"
"You know, that's exactly what I said back when we first went to the Digital World, right before I was sucked into that freaky dark cave"
"." T.K. suddenly found something very interesting on the floor that took his attention.
"I'm not here to lecture you Keru." T.K. immediately looked up at the mention of this name and smiled slightly.
"I'm just here to tell you that there is always someone to talk to. I know Cody is looking out for you, and so are the rest of the digidestined and of course, you have your wonderful brother here."
"Thank you Matt, I'll keep that in mind." T.K. smiled his first real smile in a long time.
"Well, I gotta go bro, but you're definitely gonna be there tomorrow, right?"
"Of course, I wouldn't miss it for the world, ours or the digital!"
"Good, I got a surprise for you."
Matt stepped out of the doorway.
"Bye Keru."
"Bye Yama."
"Oh and T.K., one more thing." T.K. raised his eyebrow somewhat, suspecting what was coming.
"If you want to talk to someone else, I'm sure Kaaaaaaaaaaaaaaari will want."SLAM!!!
"Hehehe, that was too easy."
All I want to remember
Pretty pictures on the wall
I remember you happy
I remember it all
All I want to remember
Sunflowers in your room
"Hey guys, I know that the concert is tomorrow, but I got a new song for our encore OK?"
"Whatever Matt, like we could stop you anyway"
"Hehehe, thanks guys, it goes like this."
THE BIG EVENT
"I'd like to thank you all one more time, this is our last song which is brand new, it's so new I just wrote it yesterday!" The crowd went wild.
"It's for someone very special to me, some one that I love." The crowd was now very definitely separated. Some people were screaming their congratulations - mostly the guys who HAD to bring their girlfriends. Some were booing, lead mostly by Jun, who was jumping up and down in the mosh pit. Others were resigned to the fact that eventually, a great guy like Matt, would end up finding some one, but they still could dream.
The band started up.
"Well anyways, here it goes.
I know where you go
When you want to fall
Why do you want to be broken?
Ohhh, I know where you go
When you want to fall
Yes your friends they tell me everything
Yes I know where you go
Yes I know what you do
Yes I know the awful things you say
And who you say them to
Yes I know where you go
Yes I know what you do
I know how you feel
You get crazy inside
They say it runs in the family
Ohhh, I know just how you feel
When you get crazy inside
Your mom said that
You are just like me
Ohhh, I can see it in your eyes
I can see it in your shaky hands
Yes, I think you think I'm stupid
You don't think I understand
Yes, I see you and see myself
When I was a younger man
When you were a child
You were happy and free
You were my reason to live
I would die when you smiled at me
I can still see you
I remember you painting
Sunflowers in your room
I know where you go
When you want to fall
Hey don't you want to be happy?
Yeah, I know where you go
When you want to fall
You're useless friends
They tell me everything
Everything
I see you run around in circles
I see you digging your own hole
I see you fight the fights
You just can't win
I see you losing self-control
What it does to me
Deep down inside
I hope you'll never know
When you were a child
You were happy and free
You were my reason to live
I would die when you smiled at me
I can still see you
Painting flowers on the wall
I remember you happy
I remember it all
Yeah, When you were a child
You were happy and free
You were my reason to live
I would die when you smiled at me
I can still see you
I remember you painting
Sunflowers in your room
Ohh, sunflowers in your room
Yeah, sunflowers in your room
All I want to remember
Pretty pictures on the wall
I remember you happy
I remember it all
All I want to remember
All I want to remember
Sunflowers in your room
Ohhh, sunflowers in your room
Ohhh, sunflowers in your room
Yeah, sunflowers in your room.."
The people in the crowd were completely going off.
"That song was for my baby brother, I love you bro."
T.K. smiled a genuine smile, he had the greatest brother in the world.
Matt smiled a genuine smile, he had the greatest brother in the world.
Hmm, well, it was a good idea when I first thought of it, honest! Maybe I shouldn't of had all that chocolate... Oh well...
Argh, so cheesy, oh well, please read and review. Wait, you have probably already read it if you're reading this. Umm, please review? Yeah, that's what I wanted to say.
Oh, and btw, if you're reading this AAUK, notice how it's ALL posted at once, no need for follow ups or extra chapters =^o^=
I would just like to thank everybody who reviewed my last fic (well those who constructively reviewed it that is ^_^).
I have tried to follow the advice I have been sent by everyone. As such you will not find ANY authors notes throughout this fic (it's harder then it sounds).
It has been thoroughly spell and grammar checked (hopefully ^_^)
It has no Davis bashing (I just totally left him out hehehe) - I really don't mind the guy, I made some cracks about him in my last fic and got totally flamed. Argh, my sense of humor gets me in trouble again!
I really want to thank Renegade for sharing her absolutely weird life experiences with me (do horses taste buds work like human ones? Ask Ren, she'll tell ya)
Together Again for helping me keep AAUK inline ^_^
RockyRobin38 'cos he's a good writer and a nice guy.
Sir Brass of Pen for writing looooong reviews (if you have gotten on from him you'll know what I'm talking about.)
And last but not least Ms.SweetiePie for writing awesome songfics and inspiring me to do this!!!
Disclaimer: I don't own Everclear, but I do own Digimon, no really I do! (If you believe that, I have a plot on the moon I'm willing to sell for US$100 ^_^)
~~~~~
Matt watched as Cody left the garage where he and his band were practicing.
~ I never knew that the whole Angemon/Devimon experience was still haunting T.K. ~
Matt mentally kicked himself, T.K. was his younger brother, he should be the one to notice when he was troubled, not some little kid who just meet T.K. It's not like he didn't expect something like this to happen, he sensed something was wrong but thought that T.K. could sort it out on his own, eventually.
"Yo Ishada! You still in there?" ~ Why the hell are all drummers such big mouths? ~
"Umm, guys, I think we should call it a night, it's getting pretty late, and plus we're damn near perfect" ~ That should stop them from asking questions ~
"Hey Matt, why are you leaving so early, your usually the one who says near perfect is not near enough, did that kid say something to upset you?"
"Oh hahaHA!" The other band members were chatting while the packed up their gear. Matt on the other hand grabbed his bass, shoved it in his carry case and took off.
"Come on T.K., pick up." Matt muttered impatiently.
"Wasssssssup!!!"
"...T.K. what the hell have you been eating?"
".Oh, hehehe, hi Matt"
"Ohhh, now I get it, are you expecting a call from Kaaaaaari?" Matt said in the patronizing big brother voice.
".If you've rung me to start up on that whole me and Kari thing." T.K. sighed, he had heard this many times before.
"Nah, nah, nah, I just rung up 'cause I thought that you would want to know that your little friend Cody has just come 'round to speak to me"
"Oh really, what did he want?"
"It was really inconvenient, as we were right in the middle of pract."
"Mattttt! I don't really need to know all that do I? Please just tell me what Cody wanted, it must have something to do with me if you're ringing me up"
"Well, he just wanted to know, what the deal with you and the 'powers of darkness', you know, why you get pissed every time a new enemy appears." Matt could sense T.K. tense up on the other end of the phone. After a couple of seconds T.K. released the breath he was holding.
".and you told him." T.K. waited for his brother to fill in the blanks.
".I told him about Devimon. He had a right to know because." Matt was just about to justify his actions, he really didn't want to go behind T.K.'s back and tell everybody about his private life, it's just that this could endanger his little brothers life, not to mention the rest of the digidestined.
"Oh, thanks Matt, I hope you made Cody feel better about every thing." T.K. spat out sarcastically. "Talk to you later."
"'Kay, later"
*Click*
Matt couldn't understand, why wouldn't T.K. tell him if he was still concerned about that Angemon/Devimon battle. Sure there was that whole thing about the importance of life outweighing the powers of darkness but it's not like it was....his fault Angemon was deleted. ~ That has to be it! ~ T.K. must blame himself for losing Angemon. But it wasn't his fault. Just like it wasn't your fault when you couldn't protect T.K. all the time. ~ God I hate it when the voices in my head start to make more sense then me. ~
Cody had told Matt how sometimes T.K. would disappear by himself. Once Cody had followed T.K., he had been lead to a big canyon. T.K. sunk to his knees and started to punch the ground until blood started to form on his knuckles.
I know where you go
When you want to fall
Why do you want to be broken?
I know where you go
When you want to fall
Yes your friends they tell me everything
Cody then told Matt how he got as close as possible to T.K. without alerting him. He had over heard T.K. cursing, going on about someone who was weak and pathetic and couldn't protect those who he held dear.
Upon hearing this, Matt automatically assumed that T.K. must have been talking about him. How he couldn't hold the family together and how he couldn't protect T.K. in the digital world. Matt now realized that T.K. must have been talking about himself. He crawled into bed thinking of his baby brother, how he had grown up too fast.
Yes I know where you go
Yes I know what you do
Yes I know the awful things you say
And who you say them to
Yes I know where you go
Yes I know what you do
As the sun filtered through the blinds Matt stretched and smiled. Today the brothers had decided that the whole day, they were going to spend it with each other. Sure they got to see each other more often now, but it was just a 'hi' and 'bye'. ~ Maybe I could ask him what's going on in his life, without chasing him away. damn I need a shower ~ Matt realized that he didn't have a shower after the practice last night, when he really should of. He rolled out of bed and stumbled towards the shower. ~ Damn, what was I thinking telling him to come around so early, it's the weekend and I have to get up at half past eight. ~
After he got out of the shower, Matt was re-energized, he threw on his clothes. Instead of the tight constricting black top and jeans, he settled on a white tank top with a baggy black unbuttoned shirt over the top and.some jeans.they were baggier then usual because the boys had decided to go out rollerblading along the beach. Matt strutted out into the lounge, his father was out again, that's the problem with working in the media.
"And what time do you call this?" A voice startled Matt out of his own little world.
"T.K. I thought we agreed to meet up at half past nine?" Matt eyed up his brother. He was wearing tan cargo shorts, a tight white singlet and a green unbuttoned shirt over the top. Very similar to what he was wearing, this made Matt smile.
"Matt, I thought that you learned how to read a clock in primary school." T.K. said innocently.
If looks could kill, T.K. would be six feet under and pushing up daisies.
"T.K. I checked the clock before I jumped into the shower and it now is. quarter to ten.uhh, sorry bro." Matt apologized.
"Don't worry, I expected as much, you'll probably just looking at yourself in the mirror again."
*WHACK!* The cushion made contact with T.K.'s head.
"Hey! What was that for?!?" T.K. pouted.
"Oh, don't try that crap with me, it may work on Mum but you know perfectly well you deserved that, if not more!"
"Hehehe, oh well, you never know unless you try, so are we going now?"
"Just got to do my hair" Matt made his way, back to his room.
T.K. groaned.
The brothers finally made their way out of the apartment by half past ten.
They made their way to the beach front, sat down on the bench and strapped on their blades. After two hours of racing, dodging and basically having fun, T.K. decided it was more then past lunch time. They made their way to the local beach front café and placed their orders. Matt quickly darted outside and grabbed one of the remaining tables while T.K. waited for their lunch.
"T.K. over here"
T.K. made his way over to the table where his big brother was sitting.
"Here you go, hamburger with extra Tabasco sauce and wasbi, you know, I don't get it how you can eat such weird, hot things and still live" T.K. shook his head in disbelief.
"I take it that this hamburger with jellybeans in it is yours then." T.K. snatched his weird combination off Matt.
"Hey, as I remember, you're the one that made me eat it in the first place!" T.K. poked out his tongue.
"It was a dare you weren't meant to like it" Matt poked his tongue back.
".I suppose we're both as bad as each other then huh?" T.K. smirked.
"Yeah, we're alike in a lot of ways aren't we."
"I suppose so"
"Not just physical things either."
".What are you talking about now, Matt? Has that weird 'food' finally caught up with you?" T.K. asked amused.
"We both have been through things that we can't control, but we still blame ourselves" Matt was looking down as he said this, he slowly looked up and stared into T.K.'s eyes, hoping to find an answer.
"T.K. I know how you feel"
I know how you feel
You get crazy inside
They say it runs in the family
When he realized he wouldn't get an answer Matt continued.
"T.K. I've been there before, I know what you're going through bro." Still no response.
"You know, one of the reasons I thought about us having a day together is that mum actually told me that your starting to act a little strange lately. Sometimes you'll get all silent, otherwise you'll be really moody and then you bugger off by yourself for hours on end. She more or less told me that you were acting like.well, me." Matt said with a wry smile.
I know just how you feel
When you get crazy inside
Your mom said that
You are just like me
"T.K.!!!" Matt was starting to get fed up, but this got T.K.'s attention.
"Look T.K., I know how you feel, you're blaming yourself for something that was completely out of your control" T.K.'s eyes glazed over, he was hiding something.
"I don't know what you're talking about Matt" he spat back, clenching his hands into fists so tight, his knuckles turned white.
"I think I had better get going home now, I suddenly feel exhausted" T.K. stood to leave, "Look Matt don't worry about me, honestly I'll be fine, I'll catch up with you later." With that T.K. left Matt sitting by himself with the two similar but different burgers.
I can see it in your eyes
I can see it in your shaky hands
I think you think I'm stupid
You don't think I understand
I see you and see myself
When I was a younger man
Matt cringed. His mother was right, T.K. was acting just like he used to. Instead of using the people around him to help himself, he pretended that everything was OK, and tried to push everybody away. It didn't seem that long ago that T.K. was a sweet little boy who would find the silver lining in any storm. The little boy who could cheer anybody up, by just being his bright, energetic self.
Matt started to reminisce about the times when T.K. had made all the difference to him. There was one occasion that he would never forget, when they were still living together as a family. Their parents had decided to take a day trip out to the country. They ended up pulling into a plant nursery / café. Matt could distinctly remember being bored out of his skull, walking up a long track, surrounded by some spiny looking flowers. Matt's parents were already about 10 meters in front of Matt, when they told him to get T.K. and meet them in the café. Matt started back up the track to find his little brother, it didn't take long to find him as he was just around the corner.
"Hey, Keru, we better hurry up, Mum and Dad will already be at the café by now.Keru.Hello, is anybody in there?" Matt was for all intensive purposes, talking to himself, as his brother was completely mesmerized by a tall looking flower.
"Come on Keru, let's get going" Matt took his brothers hand and tried to pull him away.
"No, Yama, look at this."
"I saw it Keru, it's a big flower."
"No, it's not just a big flower it's so pretty and bright and strong and, and."
"Big?" T.K. turned his bright eyes toward Matt and smiled.
"Hehehe you read my mind Yama."
"Come on lets just go back now huh?"
Some how when they returned home, T.K. had convinced his parents to let him paint sunflowers in his room. He was always so happy-go-lucky and honest. Matt missed that about his little brother.
When you were a child
You were happy and free
You were my reason to live
I would die when you smiled at me
I can still see you
I remember you painting
Sunflowers in your room
Matt left the café, yet he felt an overwhelming urge to visit his brother and to try and help him out. Instead of catching the train home, Matt started to walk to his mothers and brothers apartment.
After, knocking on the door for ten seconds, he pulled out his key and unlocked the door. He walked into the apartment.
"Mum? T.K.? Anybody home?"
"Matt?"
"Patamon?"
"Oh hey Matt." Patamon came out of his hiding place.
"Hey Patamon, you wouldn't happen to know where my little brother is would you?"
"Your little brother?" the digimon replied with a confused look on his face. "Ohhh, you mean T.K., umm, no I don't know where he went, he might have gone to the digiworld."
"Oh thank you Patamon, now I'll just go through and see what's up with him"
"Umm, Matt, you might want to go upstairs and talk to Cody or Yolie."
"Why is that Patamon , he is my brother, so I'm the one who should be looking out for him not."
"Only the new digidestined can open the portal."
"Oh, hehehe, that's right"
After thanking Patamon, Matt decided to go see Cody as he really didn't want to explain this all to Yolie.
"Hey, Matt, do you want me to take you to the place where I saw T.K.?"
"No, it's alright thank you Cody, I'm pretty sure I know were it is" Matt snapped. "Sorry Cody. do you mind wanting here while I go and find him?"
"No, I don't mind" Cody answered looking at the ground.
Matt didn't mean to snap - it's just that he kinda resented Cody because he seemed to pick up on the fact something was wrong with T.K. before he did. ~ I know he means well, I'll apologize properly when I get back.~
Matt trudged on to the place where he thought his brother would be. ~ Bingo. ~
I know where you go
When you want to fall
Hey don't you want to be happy?
There, kneeling, face down to the ground was T.K. Cody had told Matt about a canyon, after he had thought about it, he knew it had to be the one where Angemon was deleted.
As he crept closer, Matt could bearly make out what T.K. was saying.
"Not only did you lose your digimon but now you're losing your friends. All these years of keeping up this façade, and then Cody sees through it easily. You're so useless. You can't even convince a child of your feelings."
I know where you go
When you want to fall
You're useless friends
They tell me everything
Everything
It really killed Matt to see his baby brother like this. He was only twelve, yet he had seen more pain and suffering then most adults. ~ Kind of ironic that he has the Crest of Hope. ~
Not only had he seen his own digimon deleted in front of his eyes trying to protect him, his family disintegrated around him but he had also seen many digimon die needlessly.
Somehow, T.K. had managed to deal with this all on his own, but now, it was obvious that he wouldn't be able to deal with it by himself for much longer. T.K. had put up an act to everyone. He was viewed as the bright and bubbly digidestined who was never down, but every now and then, his exterior shell cracked. When this happened, T.K. lashed out at what he deemed 'evil'. ~ Ken can sure vouch for that. ~
I see you run around in circles
I see you digging your own hole
I see you fight the fights
You just can't win
I see you losing self-control
What it does to me
Deep down inside
I hope you'll never know
As T.K. got up to leave, Matt crouched back into the shadows, thankfully T.K. was going to another T.V. and not the one Cody was sitting next too. As T.K. passed by, Matt caught the depressed look on T.K.'s face. ~ Poor little guy, he had to grow up so fast. ~
Matt's memory again flashed back to when T.K.'s room had been painted.
"Hey Yama!" T.K. beamed his smile again at his big brother.
"What is it now Keru?" Matt asked as he ruffled the younger boy's hair.
"I painted you a picture! Here, it's Kitty." The smile got bigger as Matt unfolded the picture.
"Hey, that's really good Keru, but there's one problem."
T.K. looked at his big brother questionably.
"Cat's aren't green Keru, hahaha"
"They CAN be!" T.K. poked out his tongue, giggling.
"Well, I suppose they could be. If you painted them!"
The boys started laughing, but ten minutes later, Matt regretted saying that.
"Yamato, could you please come here for a second?"
"Sure mum, what's the matt...." Matt couldn't finish of the sentence, because cowering in the corner was a slightly scared, green cat.
"See Matt!" T.K. beamed yet again. "Told ya there is such a thing as a green cat!"
When you were a child
You were happy and free
You were my reason to live
I would die when you smiled at me
I can still see you
Painting flowers on the wall
I remember you happy
I remember it all
Smiling as he walked back, remembering when his younger sibling was care free, Matt started to frown ~ It's so unfair that he has to go through all this, he is STILL only a little kid! ~ Finally with his mind made up, Matt had decided to confront T.K. about this.
"Are you ready to go back now Matt?" Cody asked quietly.
"Yes I am Cody, and thank you"
"For what?"
"For looking out for my little brother, I'm afraid that our family has a bit of a problem expressing our feelings constructively, as you've probably noticed by now." Matt grinned sheepishly.
"Don't mention it Matt, I'm only glad that I could help." Cody bowed.
~ Nice kid, but he can be kinda freaky with his over-politeness. ~
Once back in the real world, Matt took the elevator to T.K.'s floor. This time instead of waiting, Matt was greeted with a "Coming!"
"Oh, Matt. It's only you"
"Why, were you expecting someone? Oh, I know, you were expecting Kaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar."SLAM!!!
"Oh, that's REALLY mature!!!" Matt yelled through the door.
"Look who's talking" T.K. retaliated when he opened the door grinning.
"Touché"
"Drink?"
"No thanks, got band practice soon, I just stopped by to see how you are."
"I'm fine Matt, really I already told you this!"
"You know, that's exactly what I said back when we first went to the Digital World, right before I was sucked into that freaky dark cave"
"." T.K. suddenly found something very interesting on the floor that took his attention.
"I'm not here to lecture you Keru." T.K. immediately looked up at the mention of this name and smiled slightly.
"I'm just here to tell you that there is always someone to talk to. I know Cody is looking out for you, and so are the rest of the digidestined and of course, you have your wonderful brother here."
"Thank you Matt, I'll keep that in mind." T.K. smiled his first real smile in a long time.
"Well, I gotta go bro, but you're definitely gonna be there tomorrow, right?"
"Of course, I wouldn't miss it for the world, ours or the digital!"
"Good, I got a surprise for you."
Matt stepped out of the doorway.
"Bye Keru."
"Bye Yama."
"Oh and T.K., one more thing." T.K. raised his eyebrow somewhat, suspecting what was coming.
"If you want to talk to someone else, I'm sure Kaaaaaaaaaaaaaaari will want."SLAM!!!
"Hehehe, that was too easy."
All I want to remember
Pretty pictures on the wall
I remember you happy
I remember it all
All I want to remember
Sunflowers in your room
"Hey guys, I know that the concert is tomorrow, but I got a new song for our encore OK?"
"Whatever Matt, like we could stop you anyway"
"Hehehe, thanks guys, it goes like this."
THE BIG EVENT
"I'd like to thank you all one more time, this is our last song which is brand new, it's so new I just wrote it yesterday!" The crowd went wild.
"It's for someone very special to me, some one that I love." The crowd was now very definitely separated. Some people were screaming their congratulations - mostly the guys who HAD to bring their girlfriends. Some were booing, lead mostly by Jun, who was jumping up and down in the mosh pit. Others were resigned to the fact that eventually, a great guy like Matt, would end up finding some one, but they still could dream.
The band started up.
"Well anyways, here it goes.
I know where you go
When you want to fall
Why do you want to be broken?
Ohhh, I know where you go
When you want to fall
Yes your friends they tell me everything
Yes I know where you go
Yes I know what you do
Yes I know the awful things you say
And who you say them to
Yes I know where you go
Yes I know what you do
I know how you feel
You get crazy inside
They say it runs in the family
Ohhh, I know just how you feel
When you get crazy inside
Your mom said that
You are just like me
Ohhh, I can see it in your eyes
I can see it in your shaky hands
Yes, I think you think I'm stupid
You don't think I understand
Yes, I see you and see myself
When I was a younger man
When you were a child
You were happy and free
You were my reason to live
I would die when you smiled at me
I can still see you
I remember you painting
Sunflowers in your room
I know where you go
When you want to fall
Hey don't you want to be happy?
Yeah, I know where you go
When you want to fall
You're useless friends
They tell me everything
Everything
I see you run around in circles
I see you digging your own hole
I see you fight the fights
You just can't win
I see you losing self-control
What it does to me
Deep down inside
I hope you'll never know
When you were a child
You were happy and free
You were my reason to live
I would die when you smiled at me
I can still see you
Painting flowers on the wall
I remember you happy
I remember it all
Yeah, When you were a child
You were happy and free
You were my reason to live
I would die when you smiled at me
I can still see you
I remember you painting
Sunflowers in your room
Ohh, sunflowers in your room
Yeah, sunflowers in your room
All I want to remember
Pretty pictures on the wall
I remember you happy
I remember it all
All I want to remember
All I want to remember
Sunflowers in your room
Ohhh, sunflowers in your room
Ohhh, sunflowers in your room
Yeah, sunflowers in your room.."
The people in the crowd were completely going off.
"That song was for my baby brother, I love you bro."
T.K. smiled a genuine smile, he had the greatest brother in the world.
Matt smiled a genuine smile, he had the greatest brother in the world.
Hmm, well, it was a good idea when I first thought of it, honest! Maybe I shouldn't of had all that chocolate... Oh well...
Argh, so cheesy, oh well, please read and review. Wait, you have probably already read it if you're reading this. Umm, please review? Yeah, that's what I wanted to say.
Oh, and btw, if you're reading this AAUK, notice how it's ALL posted at once, no need for follow ups or extra chapters =^o^=
