Warnings in this chapter, uhn, nothing much but EXTREME OVERCHARACTERIZATION!! Gomen for my idiocy in this chapter.
-Kementari
The Frog Emperor
********************
A ripoff fic brought to you by Kementari & Akai Ku
Sooo...
The next day Tasuki, Chichiri, Chiriko, and Hotofroggy mounted their
respective horsies, with Hotofroggy perched atop Chichiri's kasa. Before
leaving, everyone felt the need to make an insane, nonsensical comment:
"I'm beginning to hate 'love'...writing it, anyway."
"At least I can *****n' BREATHE on this ****** ride!!"
"*ribbit* I just want to go now so I can be kawaii and shounen again
*ribbit*"
"Well let's go Tai... Tai... Tai... Tai-Dye na no da?"
*WHAP!!*
"I never thought YOU'd forget my name, Chichiri!" said Tai-Cranky-Lady-Who's-Name-We-Once-Again-Have-Forgotten.
Akai: Hey, I can't help it na no da!
Now as stories go, people march along for a while but it gets boring
so they end up in a city. This time, however, Tasuki had decided
to lead them and they ended up going the wrong way..
And then ended up in uhn.. Konan? Kotou?
It wasn't a good place to be anyway.
Some people looked at them funny, since it's odd to see a froggy on
top of a monk's head, but most of the people in the Konan marketplace.
Akai: (I think you mean Kutou; Konan is Hotohori's country no da)
Kementari: ( Ka, I figured.)
As they continued down the street, they suddenly heard a very low,
eeevil cackle.
This belonging to the crazed psycho homo Tomo, hey!! Rhyme!
Ba da dum!!
"KAKAKKA!!" Tomo grinned evilly.
"AW give us a !**!^*!^* break here! We have a !*^**!^ emperor
turned into a *^*!^* frog and you wanna *!*^!*^
BUG US?!"
Tomo blinked.
Chiriko sighed. "Didn't you ALREADY get brought back once?" Tomo blinked.
Again.
"Ka?"
"Da!"
*ribbit!*
*sweatdrop*
Well, the conversation was going many places quickly, nowhere among
them...
"Let the genius remember the most minor of minor details," Tomo muttered
darkly. Chichiri sweatdropped.
"Anou, what are dead people doing here na no da?"
The boy seishi raised his hand timidly.
"I...uhm...can see him...?"
Silence.
*POW!!!*
"OUCH!!! TASUKI-SAN!!!!!!!!"
Hotohori shot Tasuki a menacing glare, something I guess only an emperor
in a frog's body can do if the emperor was once totally utterly kawaii
and shounen and nice-smelling. "That is enough, Tasuki."
"Bu-"
"No."
"If-"
"No."
"Wh-"
"NO."
"I'll-!"
"NO!"
*pout*
"Daaaaaa..."
"Kakakaaaaaa," Tomo said nervously. "Kaugh kaugh, I'm here because...."
"I've come to hunt down those twins and RIP THEIR THROATS OUT!! KAKAKA!!"
Tomo cackled evilly. "And also, they were having a sale on shampoo."
"Shampoo?" Hotohori perked up. "Green tea type or eucalyptus
leaves?"
"Kakaka, uhn, I think it was tea leaves plus conditioner?"
"The expensive kind?"
"HAI!" Immediately the two shounen launched into a long talk about
hair care, both realizing they belonged to the same hair club. And
since hair club members always help out in a crisis, even if they hate
each other with a passion, Tomo offered assistance.
"Kakaka, I think Nakago is holding a princess in a castle in another
country," Tomo said as he was paying for his shampoo.
"But the *!^*!*!^!^ blondie's !^**!^ dead.." Tasuki interjected.
"HE IS?!"
Chichiri sweatdropped. "THAT was bright na no da...." Tomo no Psycho
Homo was in hysterics.
"Nakkie-poo!! NAKKIE-POO HAS GONE!! KAWAHAWAHAWHAAAa...*sniffle*
"This is more than slightly odd," Chiriko managed to get out before
Tasuki clamped rough hands over his eyes and ears. "Not fer ya t'$%$# hear...
Oy..."
Now, as we've stated before, Hair-Club members stick together. So Hotofroggy
KNEW he HAD to help Tomo.
"Ribbit," he said calmly as he hopped up Tomo's shoulder, "When we
go to get the princess ribbit, we'll find Nakago for you ribbit."
Tomo sniffled. "You really...think so...?" Tasuki rolled his eyes.
"Of course ya ^#$%^% little #$%!!! Now stop @#$%# cryin' 'cause yer
smearin' yer $%#$%^ make-up an' it #$%#$ looks even $#$% MORE $%$%^-up
like that!!!"
Of course, Tasuki knew nothing about TOTALLY make-up less Tomo. Not
that _I_ care but...
Tomo smiled through his tears. He said joyously:
"KAAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKKAKAKAKKAAKAKAAKAA!!!"
So, heading deeper into the marketplace, along with Tomo who was carefully
reapplying his makeup, the uhh.. Tasuki, Hotofroggy, Chichiri, Chiriko,
and Funny Lady Tai-kun all went around the abandoned Kotou castle where
they could ifnd out where the princess was.
The castle looked like a castle, except bare. So, uhn.
Tomo led them to Nakago's room which was full of posters of beach chicks
and eeevil plans and lots of loud cds that had kept all the other Seiryu
up all night and made them grumpy and eeevil.
There, Tomo grabbed Nakago's diary and began to read through it.
"Dear Diary," Tomo began as he opened the fuzzy pink book. "Today..."
*sweatdrop*
"Today..."
Chiriko tapped his foot.
Hotohori stretched froggishly.
Tasuki donked his tessen against his shoulder agitatedly.
Chichiri was listening to a walkman.
Tai-Funny-Lady growled. "WELLLL?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Tomo sighed. "Ka... Well, seiryu seishi never had to learn to read,
really..." He laughed nervously as the veins slowly began to pop on the
old hag's forehead. "Kakakakakaa...." He quickly handed the
book of to Tasuki, who immediatly dropped it on the floor.
"GHAAA!!! 's $%$%^#n' PINK!!!!...an' besides, what th' $%@# makes ya
$%^# think that bandits KEN read!?" Tai-Qwan-Doe handed the book
to Chichiri with an annoyed look on her ugly mug.
"I don't have all day!!"
She thrust the open book into Chichiri's hands so Hotohori could read.
The Frog Emperor sighed.
"Gomen ne Taiit...tia... Oracle-sama," he sweatdropped, "but these
froggish eyes do not allow me to see clearly...."
Tai-Tan-Ic half roared as she called out to her former disciple.
"CHICHIRIIIII!!! READ IT!!!"
Blank stare.
The monk continued to listen, nodding his head and daing softly from
time to time...
Everyone sweatdropped. Tai-Pu-Writer was losing her cool.
...
Out of nowhere-
"NAGARATE-YUKU!!! MIZU NI UTSURUUUUUUU!!!!!!!"
OO;;;
**********************************
