Chapter 10 (Conclusion)
*You've gotta choose who'll stay behind…. You've gotta choose who'll stay behind…. You've gotta choose…* Clark's words kept echoing again and again in Carey's head.
"How am I supposed to choose?" Carey said feeling defeated. "I…. I… I can't do this! You can't make me do this!" he stood up suddenly, anger written all over his face, hurt shining in his eyes.
"I'm… sorry. I thought it would help" Clark looked down. *I'm never gonna do anything right for him, am I? Everything I do he just twists it around, finds the dark side. I'm his brother and yet… I'm a stranger… the bad guy.*
"How was that supposed to help?!" Carey's raised voice was dangerous, poisonous even. "What the hell made you think that making me choose between the 2 people I care about most was gonna help anything!?
Clark had had enough. "You said that they were too young to die so I tried to give you a chance to go back! You're my little brother and I didn't want to see you hurting. I wanted to give you another chance. But yet, you mistook my actions for something evil, same as you've been doing all day long!"
"Yeah you're a hell of a big brother! All you've ever caused us is pain and now you're trying to hide it by saying that you love us and that you just wanted to give us another chance! You don't care about Clu or me at all! You just think you do." Carey continued his attack on Clark. Meanwhile, Fi and Clu were speechless. This wasn't like Carey; he'd never done something like this before.
"I…I do care," Clark's voice wavered as his eyes filled with tears. "How can you say that I don't? Every day I think about you and Clu, wish that I could be with you and do everything older brothers are supposed to do. I hated having to bring you here, but I was forced to. If it were up to me none of this would have happened. But it's not and it did. All I can do now is give you this opportunity. Just think about it for a while. Please." He turned and walked away, heading for his own room. He collapsed onto a heap on the floor before he broke down completely.
Carey was left speechless. He plopped back down on the couch, leaning back. He realized Clu and Fi were staring at him.
"What?" he asked.
"Why did you blow up at him like that? He was just trying to help." Fi looked in his eyes as she talked to him.
"I dunno why I did it." He admitted truthfully. "I guess there was just all this resentment inside me and he triggered something that made it all come out. I'm pretty sure I meant all I said, though."
"Bro, that was harsh. You made him cry" Clu finally spoke up.
"I know… but he did the same to me. We're even now, I guess."
Carey reached around once again and put his arm around Fi's shoulders. He thought about what he had to do as he absentmindedly stroked her long hair. *Clu's my baby brother and I love him so much, I can't just leave him here. But Fi… Fi's my best friend, the only one who understands me… and I love her more than anything, more than life itself. Heh heh heh, when did I become so poetic? Focus Carey, focus* Carey took a deep breath. *How am I supposed to choose between them?* he thought. *When did everything become so damn complicated?* He kept thinking for over an hour, just sitting holding Fi who was talking to Clu. Then suddenly he remembered something Clark had quoted him on earlier. *Clark said that Fi and Clu were too young to die… then they should be the ones to go back.* He smiled, the problem finally solved.
"Fi… Clu," he said. "I've made my choice." They looked at him in awe. Clark had come back by that time and was now looking expectantly at his brother.
"You did? How… who?" Clark was the only one with the courage to ask. The other two were still completely shocked.
"Both of them," Carey answered simply.
"But only two of you can go back, not three" Clark said.
"I never said three of us were going"
"But that means…" Fi trailed off.
"Yeah, I'm staying here, you're going back," he finished. It hadn't been as hard as he thought it would be. *I can get used to staying here, I guess. It's only for the rest of eternity…*
Clark's mouth curled up into a smile. *I knew he was gonna do this. I'm surprised it took this long for him to figure it out.*
"Carey… don't." Fi was crying once again. *Great, I tell him I love him, then he deserts me.*
"If that's your final choice, then say your goodbyes now. They have to leave soon." Clark told Carey.
"Carey I don't want go back and leave you here" Fi choked out.
"Me neither." Clu added.
"Guys, you have to. You've got your whole lives to live and you're gonna go do that. For me."
"Ok… we'll do it" they answered, still reluctant.
"Guys, you're running out of time" Clark warned.
Clu came over first and hugged his older brother. "I'm gonna miss you bro."
"Me too. But we'll see each other again. That's a promise. I love you. Don't ever forget it. Bye" Carey hugged his brother tightly and placed a kiss on the top of his head. Clu's eyes misted up as he went over to Clark to say good-bye.
"Fi…" Carey began but was cut off as she reached up and kissed him.
"I don't agree with what you're doing, but you've got your reasons and I respect that. I love you Carey and I don't want to leave you behind yet. I… I'm gonna miss you so much. I don't know how I'm gonna get through life without you." She broke down crying, her face buried in his chest. He cried with her while simultaneously trying to soothe her,
"Shhh… it'll be ok…" Carey whispered, not fully believing it himself. Fi's sobs got softer and she looked up at him. "Fi… you've gotta go now. I'm gonna miss you so much" he looked deeply into her eyes, their gazes locking as he pulled her even closer to him, enjoying the way she felt in his arms. Fi reached up once more and brushed her lips against his. The kiss got deeper and more passionate as the two realized this would be the last time they saw each other for (hopefully) a very long time.
Clu was gaping yet looked amused as he watched at his brother and Fi, while Clark was just smirking, happy for both of them. "Fi… last chance, we gotta go now!" Clark said once more, interrupting the kiss. Fi whispered a last goodbye to Carey as she walked over to Clark and Clu. "Guys, this might feel a bit weird at first, but the feeling doesn't last very long. Bye" he said as the two teens started turning into rainbow colored orbs and disappearing.
"They… they're truly gone aren't they?" Carey asked, a bit disbelieving. *I'm alone with him now, probably forever* he thought bitterly *but I don't really regret it*.
"You did the right thing… exactly what I knew you'd do," Clark smiled warmly at his younger brother. "So… do you forgive me?"
"Actually, I do. You came through. You really were trying to help." Carey returned the smile. "And I'm sorry for what I said before"
"Don't worry about it. You were right to be angry."
"So… we're gonna be together here for a while, right?" Carey asked, a hint of disappointment apparent in his voice.
"Yeah, we are. It'll give us time to catch up on what's been happening for the last 15 years." Clark answered with a smile, glad to be able to talk peacefully to his brother.
"Cool… let's do it then" Carey said, happy that Clark was back as he had always remembered him to be: caring and always willing to catch up on gossip.
[Mortal Realm, 20 minutes later]
"Ugh..." Fi groaned as she woke up. It was already getting dark. She looked around and saw Clu sleeping peacefully on the ground. *Where are we?* she wondered. She took a closer look around and realized they were in the park across the street from where the bus was parked.
"Clu, wake up. We've gotta get to the bus" she shook him awake. He mumbled something that sounded suspiciously like "five more minutes, Mom" and rolled over. She giggled and shook him harder until he opened his eyes.
"What?" he snapped, obviously grumpy at being woken up.
"We've gotta get back to the bus and explain some stuff to everybody." She answered patiently. "Like why you're back and Carey's gone."
"Oh… that."
"Damn it, he's really gone. And he's not coming back." She started whimpering and Clu wrapped her up in a hug. "I miss him"
"Me too… me too. We'll see him again eventually… don't worry" Clu said softly. Fi sobbed for a while longer, until she regained her composure, focusing on what she had to do next.
"Come on… let's go to the bus." She got up and helped Clu up as well. They walked back to the bus slowly in complete silence, just thinking about what to say to everybody when they got back on. They hesitated a bit before going into the bus. Everybody was waiting in the community area when Fi and Clu walked in.
"Clu…" they all said in awe. Irene hugged Clu and burst into tears of joy at having her youngest son in her arms once again. Everybody else's reactions were pretty much the same. After everybody got over the initial shock, they realized who was missing.
"Where's Carey?" Molly asked Fi.
"Um…
"Explain everything. Now" Irene commanded.
Fi and Clu sat down next to Jack and Annie as they slowly explained everything exactly as it had happened, no matter how weird it sounded. By the time they were done it was fully dark outside… and in everyone's hearts. Their faces were all full of sorrow. Clu was back… but Carey was gone.
Eventually, Fi excused herself and went to the room she shared with Annie. She turned on the radio and sat on her bed and broke down crying once more, thinking about Carey… the guy she loved. The guy who had sacrificed his own life for hers and Clu's. She listened to the song playing on the radio intently, identifying the lyrics with her feelings.
Hey
If we can't find a way out of these problems
Then maybe we don't need this
Standing face to face
Enemies at war we build defenses
And secret hiding places
I might need you to hold me tonight
I might need you to say it's alright
I might need you to make the first stand
Because tonight I'm finding it hard to be your man
Hey
More than angry words I hate this silence
It's getting so loud
Well I want to scream
But bitterness has silenced these emotions
It's getting hard to breathe
So tell me isn't happiness
Worth more than a gold diamond ring?
I'm willing to do anything
To calm the storm in my heart
I've never been the praying kind
But lately I've been down upon my knees
Not looking for a miracle
Just a reason to believe
I might need you to hold me tonight
I might need you to say it's alright
I might need you to make the first stand
Because tonight I'm finding it hard to be your man
Do you remember not long ago?
When we used to live for the nighttime
Cherish each moment
Now we don't live we exist
We just run through our lives
So alone
That's why you've got to hold me
Hey
If we can't find a way out of these problems
Then maybe we don't need this
Standing face to face
Enemies at war we build defenses
And secret hiding places
I might need you to hold me tonight
I might need you to say it's alright
I might need you to make the first stand
Because tonight I'm finding it hard to be your man
*I wish you were here now. I can't make it without you* she thought to herself. Eventually, she cried herself to sleep, tears still rolling down her cheeks.
[Batakas, meanwhile]
Carey and Clark had been talking for hours. Carey had told Clark everything he could, seeming a bit wistful at the memories. *Most of what he's saying is related to Fi and Clu* he realized.
"You really miss them, don't you?" Clark asked.
"Yeah… I just can't imagine having to live without them for so long." Carey answered wistfully.
Clark contemplated what he could do. Then he realized there was something that would make everything better. *I can retire form my post, escape to the spirit world… and by doing that Carey can go back to the mortal world.*
"Carey… what if you didn't have to?*
"Huh? You're not gonna bring them back here." Carey was very confused.
"I never said I was… I can send you back." Clark answered smiling.
"Really?" Carey jumped up, excited. "But how? What about you? Can you come too?" He didn't want to leave his brother now that things were good between them.
"Carey… I can't go back with you. I've been gone too long… I couldn't go back. It would be too strange, too much to get used to. Way too much explaining, too much awkwardness and speculation would come from it. I'm just gonna go to the spirit world, like I should have when I first died." Clark answered, feeling a twinge of pain as Carey's face fell. "But you can go back. Since I'm gonna retire, well run away really, whoever I brought who is still here can go back. It's a rule."
"But what about the AEF?" Carey asked.
"If I do it fast enough they won't notice. Which means we have to do this now. Plus, they can't hurt me in the spirit world." Clark got up too and hugged his brother.
"You're leaving me again?" Carey's eyes watered as he realized he wouldn't see Clark for a long time.
"Only for a while. I'll always be with you, and I'll try to visit when I can. I love you little bro… I really do. Send my love to Mom and Dad. Now let's do this."
Carey disappeared into orbs at the same time that Clark slowly became translucent, and then totally gone. "Bye bro…" he said in a soft whisper.
[Mortal World]
Carey woke up right outside the bus. *Home… I'm home.* He let out a small groan and tried to get up. He had a massive headache, and a dull pain in his ribs. He fell against the side of the bus, eliciting a thud.
Fi woke up when she heard something hit the bus. She looked out her window and saw the top of a blondish head. *Carey? It can't be him, can it?* She ran out of her room, waking everybody up as she went to open the bus door.
"Carey!!!!!" she screamed happily as she ran and hugged him. She immediately gave him a long, deep kiss. Everybody else ran out of the bus and saw Carey standing there. Yeah, he looked a bit tired and a little bit beat up, but overall he looked ok. His parents quickly wrapped him in a hug, crying tears of joy. Everybody else followed suit.
"Can we please go inside… I'm tired" Carey yawned for emphasis. He walked onto the bus leaning on Fi. He sat down on the couch, still holding Fi, as everyone asked him to explain. He did, including everything about Clark. When he was done, dawn was only an hour away. "I'm sleepy," his voice drowsy as he yawned again, barely able to keep his eyes open.
"Ok… we should all get to bed and get a little sleep." Ned said.
Carey got up and went to his room, where he changed quickly into his pajamas. He lay down on his bed, too tired to even think about everything that had happened. As he was about to fall asleep, Fi came into the room. He drowsily motioned for her to sit down next to him.
"I'm so glad you're back. I missed you so much" she said to him as she sat down.
"Me too" he mumbled back. She brushed a strand of hair out of his face, her hand lingering for a while on his cheek. He looked adorable like that. She saw he was struggling to stay awake, so she said goodnight and started to go towards the door.
"Come back… stay here" Carey mumbled. She hesitated a bit, but then agreed and lay down next to him on the bed. He smiled and just wrapped his arms tightly around her as she snuggled against him. "I love you Fi" Carey murmured before falling asleep.
"I love you too" she answered, her eyes closing. He kissed her forehead softly and they both drifted off into dreamland, glad that everything was finally over.
Clark's stood outside the boy's room, smiling now that everyone was truly happy. He took one final look around the bus, gazing quietly at his family. Then he slowly disappeared with one final wave at his family on the bus.
